


Harry Potter and the Nightmare War

by bipolarmario



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-24
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:54:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 16
Words: 132,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25478734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bipolarmario/pseuds/bipolarmario
Summary: "Behold the yew wand. The wizard who wields it is Death ... and Hell follows with him". Only Harry and Hermione, and the elusive Power He Knows Not, stand in the way of Voldemort and Total Victory against the heart of Magic itself. Post HBP AU [Dark themes]
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Harry Potter
Comments: 41
Kudos: 83





	1. Chapter 1: Ènouement

Hello all, I have been a fanfiction reader since 2003. When there was a break between books being published, fanfiction is how I kept myself going. I have written a few different short fanfictions, but never posted them. I started writing this in 2015 when I had a plot bunny that I couldn't get out of my head. I finally decided that I have done enough edits with my wife to start posting this story.

A few notes:

1\. This is a dark dark story. This a story about war, and what war really looks like. Lots of tough topics will be mentioned. Many aren't super fun. But they won't be gratuitous or anything and mostly will occur off screen. But heavy topics will be mentioned.

2\. This is a H/Hr story, I try to stay away from the tropes as much as possible, but there are a few that worked too well with the plot that I wanted to use, that I left them in.

3\. The characters might seem OOC from a certain perspective. Since I am writing them how I feel real teenage Harry would act. Not the kid version in the book, a Harry that swears and does things that you would expect a 17 year old to do. And someone put under life and death stress on constant occasions, these things change a person and I wanted to explore that. I do my best to keep the OOC reasonable and believable as much as possible.

4\. This story is completed. It clocks in just under 300k words. I won't leave it abandoned or stop posting, so if you are one of the people (like me) that doesn't like to risk getting invested in a story that might be dropped before it is done, that won't happen here.

5\. And finally, I know I'm not perfect. I'm also from the US, so there is probably a lot of room for britpicking, but I didn't know how to do that in a realistic way, so I decided to not try to fake it that often. If there are suggestions, feel free to drop them in the comments.

I hope you enjoy this story as much as I have enjoyed writing it. Without further ado:

Harry Potter and the Nightmare War

PART 1:

**Chapter 1: Ènouement:**

_The bittersweetness of having arrived in the future, seeing how things turn out, but not being able to tell your past self._

**Saturday, July 27th, 1997**

* * *

The walls of his 'bedroom' at Privet Drive seemed to close in a small bit closer every time Harry took note of them. The room had always been small, after all, some 6 years ago this very room had been used for Dudley's extra toys. Harry rolled his shoulder uncomfortably. The feeling of tingling between his shoulder blades seemed to creep up and down his back. He tried to tell himself that the discomfort came from the fact that he was trapped at the Dursley's again, but he knew that wasn't true.

The tightness in his throat started to rise and he felt himself start to breath faster. Sweat broke out on his forehead and he could feel his glasses start to slide down his nose. This mental battle that would happen every night was starting to wear him down physically and mentally. If his thoughts started to wander too far images plagued him and refused to leave him in any semblance of peace. Clear your mind indeed. The clearer he tried to keep his mind, the more intruding thoughts started racing into the space.

Harry tried to force the thoughts away but he found that he couldn't. Like a sticking charm the thoughts and voices seemed to swirl around his head and stick on to anything. Word strings started to blend together. Lines of thought streaming off of any word that seemed to spark a new idea. He closed his eyes as the voices, some his own and some not, started to scream things at him.

_"Of course I'm not afraid Harry, you are with me."_

_"Books and cleverness, there are more important things, like friendship and bravery."_

_"It is time to choose between what is right and what is easy."_

_"Avada Kedevera!"_

The responsibility was what was crushing him. The idea that there were people out there that were counting on him for their very lives. Dumbledore had trusted him, and he had let him down the night on the tower. Hermione and all the other muggle born students and families were all counting on him. There was an entire country waiting for him to save the day like he had when he was a baby. Did his mother get credit for saving his life and ultimately being the one to destroy Voldemort the first time? No, it was somehow the doing of a baby boy. Now, over a decade later, the world was looking to him to do it again. Never-mind the way they had treated him in recent memory, they still looked to him.

And now Dumbledore was gone. Hermione didn't trust him anymore after the Department of Mysteries, for good reason, he added as an afterthought. And Snape was a murderer on the run. Their voices echoed around him. The taunts for Snape in his 'potions' lessons. The looks of disbelief and pity on Hermione's face when he described worrying about Malfoy. The look on Dumbledore's face while he drank the potion in a poorly lit cave. The hate on Snape's face when he fired the curse at Dumbledore. The limp form of him falling off the tower. The images and sounds were overwhelming and before Harry could stop himself, he had drawn his knees up to his chest and had his eyes tightly screwed shut.

He had been so close to having help with this mission. He had been so close to having a chance and then it was all taken away in a second and a flash of light. He had felt like there was a chance for him to survive the prophecy up until that moment. Harry knew there was a lot of grief pent up inside of him for the lost mentor. He was ashamed to admit the other reason he was taking it so poorly was because he was scared. When he had seen the Professor fall, the last line of defense Harry had against the real world fell from the parapets as well. And now all Harry could feel was panic and fear.

Dumbledore had made an attempt this past year to try to mentally prepare Harry for what was to come. To give him a few more tools in this war that had found itself resting firmly on his shoulders. The nine months that they had spent attempting to better understand the darkest wizard of their time had certainly not been wasted, but at the end of the day Harry still felt woefully unprepared for what was ahead of him. The knowledge of what Voldemort had done and the extent he had gone to protect his idea of immortality was precious in the light of understanding what was necessary to destroy him. However, Tom Riddle had been an incredibly gifted wizard before his decent into madness, and the years and transformations had not made him weaker, despite his skeletal appearance. Making Tom Riddle mortal again was only half the battle. Besting him in a performance of magic...Harry knew the odds well enough to estimate his chances of surviving that duel.

The walls closed in on Harry a little more. The room feeling even more stifling than it had even just a minute previous. He had seen so many people die, and now he was all alone in his room. The same way how he was alone in all of this. That final moment, facing off against Lord Voldemort, what would likely be Harry's last moments as well, he would be all alone.

Harry squeezed his legs harder and felt the muscles in his arms weaken a bit with the strength he was exerting on trying to make himself as small as possible. After about fifteen minutes of the feelings of overwhelming panic seemed to wash aside, he opened his eyes and looked around.

He tried to absorb the room around him. The late afternoon sun sparkled through the windows and refracted across some of the more shiny things in his room. Headwig's perch, his glasses sitting on the bedside table, and the pictures of him and his friends that he had put up to try remind him that for the moment he might not be as alone as he felt.

The pictures didn't do anything to make him feel better. Sitting next to the pictures was a small stack of letters. Well it wasn't that small anymore. It had started off as a small stack of letters at the start of the summer, but it had grown substantially since then.

Hermione's letters...they had gone unanswered. He wasn't sure what to do about them. There was a decent mixture of shame and fear when he stared at that stack of letters. The truth was, he didn't know what to say. There was a part of him that wanted to leave them unanswered so that way she would be safe. If he just didn't answer and disappeared after his birthday then maybe she would be safe. She had a family, a life ahead of her, careers to have. Hermione had so much in her life that she could fall back on, it was selfish of him to want her with him the entire way to Voldemort.

The shame bubbled up then. She had distanced herself from him last year for good reasons. Hermione had been focused on her grades, her tests and the book that Harry was using. Lavender and Ron provided some distraction for her as well it seemed, but in the end she hadn't believed him because the last time he had asked her for help, he had been dead wrong, and she had almost just been dead. Over the years his 'adventures' had always turned out to be correct hunches or a matter of life and death where a decision had to be made. The Department of Mysteries was different. He had been completely wrong, led them all into danger, and ended up getting his Godfather killed and facing down Lord Voldemort. She had been right to walk away, he was useless without guidance from someone else. Dumbledore had been out of the castle and he had made a decision about saving Sirius, Hermione had tried to stop him, to make him see sense, but he hadn't been able to hear her.

When the decision had come down to Harry, he had been wrong. When it had come to step up and help Dumbledore on a mission, the Headmaster had ended up dead. Harry wasn't good enough to function on his own and Hermione was completely right to step away from that life.

The selfish part of him wanted her to stay. Ron as well. He wanted them there, he wanted their friendship and support, but it was coming to a breaking point where he couldn't ask that of either of them anymore without asking them to more or less sacrifice their lives for this. Something he was not willing to ask them to do.

Enough people had died trying to keep him alive, he wouldn't let the same thing happen to his friends.

The letters were unanswered because he knew he wasn't strong enough to tell her to stay away from him. Her and Ron were the backbone of what he was trying to do, they always had been, but now it was time for him to handle things on his own. At least that is what Harry kept trying to tell himself. At the end of the day he wasn't scared of losing to the Dark Lord because he was scared of dying, because he wasn't. He was scared of other people dying for him if he didn't work fast enough. He was scared for the others and hoped that if he left them behind he wouldn't have to hold on to that feeling.

So there they sat and Harry couldn't take his eyes off them sometimes. He had been able to answer Ron's letters without too much problem. A couple lines about Quidditch and a few lines about how the muggles were treating him and Ron didn't expect much more than that. Hermione on the other hand, Harry cringed, there were two options. Either she would be far more invasive than he wanted and he would have push her away. Or she would be avoiding the subject completely, meaning that she had for sure walked away from this. They both made his stomach turn.

He moved to the desk, unfurling himself from the ball he had made of himself on the bed. Sitting down he sighed. He was tired since he had trouble sleeping these days, but taking another nap didn't seem like a good use of his time. His fingers drummed on the desk in a repeated fashion. The soft crinkle of Hermione's letters crunched out from underneath his fingers, but he kept the rhythm. Hedwig had been gone for longer than she should have been at this point. He had sent her to the Burrow yesterday with an update letter for Ron. Ron had wanted to come and rescue Harry again a-la-Second year, but Harry had managed to persuade him against it. She should have been back by now though.

As if summoned by his dreary thoughts, Harry heard the soft whip of feathers and sound of air brushing over feathers as the snowy white owl winged into the room. The afternoon sunlight reflected in her amber eyes as she stared him down disapprovingly. Harry knew Hedwig was quite upset that he hadn't answered Hermione's letters. Many times after a wizard and a pet such as an owl spent enough time together, they formed a bond that went beyond that of normal pets. Harry was sure that his familiar more than understood what was going on and she was probably very upset that they were still at the Dursley's as well. Regardless there wasn't a whole lot that Harry could do about the Owl's mood other than to offer her some treats and rest after her journey.

She dropped the small parcel and letters on the desk and turned her back to him. Dipping her beak in the water cup on his desk before hopping over to her perch.

"What did you bring me today girl?" Harry asked softly, surprised at the sound of his voice, seeing as he had only used it a few times since arriving here earlier that summer.

Her hoot of indignation answered him enough.

He knew that she had dropped off more from Hermione. Hedwig was taking it personally that he wasn't sending as many letters as she would like.

He reached for the parcel first and tore the brown paper away from it only to find himself staring at a small mirror. It was nondescript, but didn't appear to have any impurities or scratches on the face of it. Harry turned it over, not really sure what to do with it. He knew that Sirius had given him something similar in his 5th year, but he wasn't sure who had sent this to him and he knew that the mirrors that he had previously owned, were shattered. Placing it gingerly on the desk, Harry opened Hermione's letter, thinking she would be the logical choice in the matter.

_Harry,_

_You have a map that works similar to the way the mirror does._

_Hermione_

Harry winced as he read the note. There was a definitive lack of personality in the note. Even the way she used punctuation screamed that she was restraining herself. Harry could almost hear the clipped tone in her voice and the line appearing between her eyebrows that was a warning sign to her anger. The only other option was that she was in danger and reaching out to him.

He knew that activating the mirror meant one of two things. Either Hermione was in trouble, or Harry was in trouble with Hermione. Either way the conversation was going to be unpleasant, but Harry's concern for her safety finally won out in the end.

"I solemnly swear that I am up to no good" Harry intoned slowly.

The mirrors face fogged over for just a moment before a familiar face came into view. The fog on the face dissipated and Harry could see all the tell tale signs that she was quite angry.

The question was, who was she angry with? Harry didn't actually need to ask the question, and yet he hoped that he was wrong.

"Harry Potter, you selfish bastard." She threatened.

He wasn't wrong. Damn.

The corners of her eyes were tight and Harry could tell that she had not been sleeping much recently. "Did you even bother to read my letters or did you just decline to comment?" Her tone was fury, but he could see in her eyes that she was also somewhat relieved that he had answered. She had been worried about him, which had clearly caused her distress. Double damn.

He didn't even have the mental strength to argue with her. If she was that mad at him, then maybe it would make the decision for her and he wouldn't have to put her in danger.

"'lo Hermione" He mumbled. Again surprised at the sound of his horse voice.

She waited with a stern look on her face, not deterred by a second at his disheveled appearance.

"I'm sorry I didn't write back. I don't really have a good answer as to why." He said meekly, not coming up with anything to side track her away from his real reasons. Leaving it open ended just begged for her to open this conversation up again at a later date. Harry hated the small part of his brain that screamed at him that there would never be a 'later'.

"So you don't even send me a note saying you are," she waved her arms around for a second searching for the word, "not feeling social and that you were safe?! I've been worried about you!" She said, the anger not coming off her face yet. "If I hadn't heard from Ron that he got a letter from you I would have thought something was really wrong!"

"Sorry Hermione I just didn't think it was important." Harry said, letting a little of the truth slip out.

"I'm not important enough to send a quick note to?" Hermione asked, looking hurt.

"That's not what I meant." Harry said lamely. "I just figured after last year I would respect your wishes a bit more." The words floated out of his mouth before he had a chance to snag them again and put them back.

"Respect my wishes?" Hermione anger seemed to falter and the small line between her eye brows faded. "What does that mean?"

"It's not important Hermione, I just wanted to give you the space you needed. I saw you and Ron at the funeral, I didn't want to intrude or make things more difficult, and I know last year was a lot of academic stuff, and you were mad at me about the book and..." Harry realized he was rambling all the insecurities that he had felt over the last few weeks to her. He snapped his mouth shut. "Really it is just not important."

"The hell it isn't." Hermione said in a softer tone then the words could have warranted. "I don't want to have this conversation through the mirror. I will be there in 2 hours to pick you up. You are staying the rest of the weekend with me and my family. Before you argue, I don't really care. I'm older than you, I'm of age, and if I really wanted to take you out of that house, we both know you can't do a damn thing to stop me. I'll be there in 2 hours. Have your things packed." She snapped out the words in a rush as if she had summoned the strength just to say as much as she had.

Harry sighed staring at his wand on the bedside table. The wand seemed to mock him. Despite knowing that he wasn't going back to Hogwarts this coming term, he also knew that he didn't want the Ministry following him around in an attempt to snap his wand this summer. A few more days of no magic wouldn't be the end of the world. The anonymity it would buy him if he remained under the Ministry radar was worth far more than arguing with Hermione when she was set on something such as this.

Harry packed his things quietly. He knew that he wouldn't miss Privet Drive, but he also knew that leaving here would be leaving behind the last semblance of a childhood he had ever had. Miserable and lonely though it had been, running from Dudley and his gang had been a sight more innocent than running away from Death Eaters that would murder you as soon as saying hello. The loneliness of childhood had hidden a greater gift than he had ever realized as well. Loneliness was a burden that he had to bear while he was young, but it was far less of a burden that knowing that you could be responsible for your friends deaths. His time with the Weasley's had taught him that. Being afraid for the lives of people you cared about was the greatest fear one could have and it made the fear of childhood bullies fade into an annoying buzz in his memory.

This bedroom had been his childhood home and prison through the summers. But even so, it was without the responsibility of the future. The mistakes of childhood didn't result in people dying. It didn't result in families being destroyed. The walls around him closed him in, kept him boxed here. Stationary. Just as restricting as they were, they had protected him for a time. Kept him in the season of life that had allowed him to become strong in his own time. Even without relatives that gave a damn, this had been a soft place to fall. A shred of normalcy in a world that had gone to hell. These walls had kept him locked in childhood, and despite the growing fear in the pit of his stomach, Harry knew that it was time to leave. These walls would no longer protect him ever again. As Hermione had said years ago "Everything is going to be different now, isn't it?"

Harry walked down the stairs to the sound of the start of the evening news. He had just over fifteen minutes before Hermione would arrive. She would be punctual as always he knew. Before she showed up he wanted to at least say a few things to his relatives. They deserved to know at least what was about to happen.

"Recent reports show that has been another house fire recently. This time closer to London. These house fires are becoming more and more destructive as the summer continues. Gas leaks and faulty electrical work seems to be the cause of many of them, but that doesn't explain why now and why so many. We'll have more on this story and more at 9."

The 6pm news had always just been an hour long advertisement for the 9pm news. However in this case Harry had heard enough.

"You know as well as I do that those are not house fires by accident." Harry said quietly.

His Aunt didn't look at him, and his Uncle's only response was to start turning purple around the ears. "Well, it's none of our concern either way Boy." He muttered sharply.

"It will be after my birthday. The protections here will fade and they will come for you. They will want to know where I am." Harry said factually.

"Well we can tell them we don't know and send them on their way." Vernon said simply as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. Petunia's eye twitched, she knew that wasn't true.

"That isn't the way it works. They think less of you than they do a bug on the street. They will come to find me, which I guarantee you won't know, which I guarantee they won't believe. Then they will break your bones, tear your skin apart, begin the process of liquifying your insides, and then if you are lucky they will kill you. It will be sport to them." Harry said coldly. While he didn't wish that kind of fate on another human being no matter who they were, Harry wasn't going to stick his neck out too far for them. After all he was no more than an annoyance to be hidden in a cupboard.

Petunia seemed to be going through the five stages of grief rapidly.

"You know what happened to my parents because they wouldn't give me up. They had the power to protect themselves. Do you think it will go so quickly for you?" Harry barely whispered making dead eye contact with his Aunt. "Is Dudley's life really something you are willing to risk on stubborn pride?"

They stared at one another for a long moment. She gave him the barest of nods which he returned. Spinning on his heel, Harry returned up the stairs to his room. Feeling like he had done all he could for them, he snapped the lid of his trunk shut and opened Hedwig's cage.

"Go to Hermione's girl, I'll be there soon." She hooted softly in return. Seeming happy with the turn of events.

Harry sat on the lid of his trunk waiting. He knew she would be here soon, and he knew the conversation he was about to have with her wasn't going to be pleasant. He deserved it.

Harry sensed it before he heard it. The change of pressure in the room, the displacement of air and the small bubble of magic that apparition brought with it. Hermione's soft 'pop' of displaced air was absorbed by the walls of his room as Hermione stood in front of him. Hands already on her hips.

No words were spoken as she waved her wand and shrunk all his belongings that he had placed on the bed. Next she did the trunk just as Harry was standing. The now small items flew into her pocket as she wordlessly snatched his arm and disapparated with him in tow. Harry had expected at least a verbal warning before being whisked away.

The squelching sensation of apparition was something that Harry had yet to get used to. Despite having side-alonged Dumbledore at the end of the school year, Harry hadn't had a lot of opportunities to apparate himself, confident though he was that he could do it just fine. Harry wiggled his ears nonchalantly trying to get the faint sense of pressure to be lifted from his ear drums.

"Hermione, as happy as I am to not be at my Aunt and Uncles house, why did you bring me here? What couldn't you tell me through the mirror?" Harry asked exasperated. He had followed her instructions because if he hadn't she would have done it for him anyways. In cases like this there was really no arguing with her. But he still wasn't sure why he was here.

"Because you haven't contacted me for over a month and then when I finally hear from you, you say it's not important? I have to kidnap my best friend to get him to talk to me?" Hermione said with a cross expression on her face.

"What do you want me to say Hermione?" Harry asked, running his hand through his hair. "I haven't been doing anything important. I'm sure you are sick of hearing my crazy theories again. Or listen to me complain about the most recent person in my life has died. Hell I'm sick of it."

"Sick of it?"

"Last year you kept your distance from me, and I don't blame you! My mistake at the Department of Mysteries almost killed you! It for sure did kill Sirius and I'll have to live with that. I don't blame you for wanting some distances from me, you have goals and ambitions in the world, you have a future. I wouldn't have listened to me about Malfoy either." Harry sighed, the words tumbling out of him a slight bit faster than he liked. "I'm sick of being the one that gets everyone killed Hermione. I can only imagine that everyone else is even more sick of it."

"That all makes sense in a universe where I'm a sociopath that doesn't care about her friends." Hermione said, her lips pulled into a flat line that would make McGonagal proud. "What gave you the idea that I wanted space from you?"

"You pushed me away because of the potions book and yelled at me about it most of the time we were together. Whatever was happening between you and Ron, didn't seem like something I needed to be involved in." Harry said, thinking to the way Hermione and Ron had reacted to one another throughout the year.

"Yes! Because I didn't want you in danger!" Hermione snapped at him, her hair falling away from its hiding place behind her ear.

Harry was frustrated now. "Well that ship has sailed now hasn't it!? Chances of me making it through this alive are pretty small. The best chance for you and your family to be safe is to be far away from me. Certainly not keeping me here for a summer weekend! I thought you had figured that out and that's why you were keeping your distance." Her seemingly intentional density on the matter wasn't cute anymore.

"So that made you not answer my letters?" Hermione asked, trying to search for a way to gleam more information out of him.

"Yeah," Harry sighed, he was frustrated, but clearly so was Hermione. "I didn't have the heart to pretend about homework or test scores. I don't even know if I will survive to September, much less attend. I thought that if I kept to myself, you would go back to school without distractions." He was being honest to some extent. He however knew that he was blowing things a little out of proportion. However if that made her keep her distances a bit, the safer she would be.

"So you thought that I was just trying to forget about everything that had happened and go on with my schooling like normal? Like it wasn't just a month ago that I attended the funeral of our Headmaster?" Harry stopped himself from cringing at her clear and immanent fury.

Time to seal the deal. He was pretty much out of ideas for keeping her safe if pushing her away like this didn't work. "Yeah pretty much."

 _Smack_.

Her hand had snapped across the space from her side to his cheek faster than he would have guessed. While it did take him by surprise for a moment, he didn't begrudge her the slap.

"Do you really not know me at all? Do you really think so little of me that I would just abandon you when things got hard?!" He had expected anger, but the absolute devastation on her face was not in his plan. "You didn't even read the letters did you?

Harry made to shake his head, she caught the motion and tears started to leak down her cheeks. Any kind of frustration that she had felt earlier was completely gone.

"All I've been doing in those letters has been apologizing and begging you to forgive me for making such a stupid mistake last year. I tried to keep you safe when I should have been trusting you. But I didn't trust you, and now Dumbledore is dead because of it. I'm so so sorry." She sat down on her bed and put her face in her hands, her shoulders rising up and down in a hitched motion belying the sobs she was trying to hide.

"Hermione, you don't have anything to apologize for, Dumbledore being dead isn't your fault."

"Oh let me guess, it's yours?" She snapped her head up and glared at him through through red eyes and smudged makeup. When had she started wearing makeup?

"Of course it is! I was there with him. I failed him and now he's gone for caring about me and trusting me to help him. He trusted me, and now he is dead."

"So you are allowed to blame yourself but no one else is?" She snapped rising from the bed now, scrubbing her hands down her cheeks wiping the dampness away.

"If it was anyone elses fault then yes. Hermione, for the last three years I have gone home to grieve for another person that died because of me. My parents were only the first people to die for caring about me. I'm tired of being the reason. I don't want to have to grieve for my friends anymore Hermione." Her upset was starting to make him slip on his goal here.

"AND THEY WOULD DO IT AGAIN!" She stamped her foot her hands balled into fists at her sides. Books on her bookshelf started to quake a bit. "That's what being close to someone is!" She looked like a terrifying tornado of anger and upset all at once.

"WHICH," Harry raised a single finger to iterate his point. "is exactly why you should stay far away from me. He takes away people I care about to hurt me."

The silence that stretched between them started to become unbearable before Harry broke it. "I haven't answered your letters because I haven't known what to say. My parents cared for me, he came for them. The Weasley's cared for me, and he came for them. Sirius cared for me, and he came for him. Albus cared for me, and he came for him. Don't you see Hermione? Everyone who has cared for me, or helped me...anyone who has started to feel like family, he has come for them in some sick attempt to destroy me from the inside out." His hand rose to his scar, "I suppose you could say that in some ways he already succeeded. I haven't answered your letters, because I don't know what to do next and I have no idea how to survive what's next. I don't know that I can. And when I fail, I don't want him to come for you next." Harry finished, his voice barely a whisper as he came to and end.

"Oh Harry..." She wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his shoulder before he had much time to react.

"Oh Hermione dear, I see you have already brought Harry over," Hermione's mother appeared at the doorway, as the two of them jumped apart. "I heard some yelling up here, but I wanted to give you two some space. Dinner is ready if you two wanted to come down and eat with us."

Hermione turned to face her mother tears still glinting in the edges of her eyes. Harry hoped she wouldn't start crying, not only was he terrible with crying girls, he just didn't want to see Hermione cry. He would rather she be angry than sad.

Hermione cleared her throat. "Harry this is my mother, Jane. Mom this is Harry Potter." She said gesturing between them as was the polite thing to do.

"Nice to meet you Mrs. Granger. Sorry for all the yelling." Harry said, a little embarrassed about his share of the outbursts.

"Hermione, before you come down, you should clean your face a touch. I don't know how your father would feel if you came downstairs not only with a boy that you teleported into your room, but also crying. I feel like that is setting Harry up a bit don't you think?" Jane said with a smile and a pat on Hermione's cheek, swiping a lone tear away with her hand.

"Thanks Mum, you're probably right. I'll be right back." Hermione rushed away, yanking her wand out of her pocket and giving the bathroom door a shove before it clicked shut behind her.

Harry wasn't sure what to do, standing in Hermione's bedroom with Mrs. Granger who was staring at him intently.

He cleared his throat. "Erm, thank you for having me for dinner?" He didn't intend for it to come out like a question, but he was nervous.

"I feel like the four of us have a lot to discuss over dinner tonight don't we?" She asked quietly, her eyes not leaving his now.

"I'm not..."

"Your name appears in almost every letter I have ever gotten from Hermione since she left this house for Hogwarts." Jane said, her eyes not leaving his. "I hear stories of your adventures. Obstacle courses with real dangers as a final test. A mistake in the greenhouses resulting in her missing a semester. Dragons at a tournament run by the government. And then a mysterious injury that she had to travel to London for a number of times to be treated behind closed doors." Jane said calmly.

The bottom of Harry's stomach dropped out. Hermione hadn't told them.

"But there is something deeper than all that. She has always been focused and intense, but I have never seen her on the verge of panic day after day. She behaves as if the world is about to come to an end, and I know my daughter well enough to know that if she is that afraid, there is a reason." She smiled, Harry wasn't sure if it was a warm smile or not.

"I can't wait to tell you more about school?" Harry's uncertainty on what to do next caused the rise in inflection again despite his attempts to prevent it.

"Good lad." She patted him on the shoulder in a kind way before leaving the room as Hermione came out of the bathroom.

Hermione looked at the retreating form of her mother heading down the stairs and then a look at what must have been Harry's horrified expression. She motioned with her head to go down the stairs and as she started to turn, he snagged her shoulder halting her.

"Hermione, you haven't told your parents have you?" He asked in a whisper.

"What do you mean?" Hermione said, her eyes darting to the side.

"You haven't told them what has been happening at school have you?" He pushed.

"Well, er, no. I didn't want them to take me out of school so I smudged the details a bit." Hermione sucked in her lower lip between her teeth as she monitored his facial expression.

"This is going to be uncomfortable." Harry said as he turned toward the stairs, letting his hand fall from her shoulder as she turned to follow him. He could tell she wanted to ask more questions, but as they hit the bottom of the stairs and rounded the corner into the kitchen, it prevented her questions before they started.

Her father was sitting at the head of the table facing the door that Hermione and Harry had just walked through. He smiled at his daughter and rose from his chair to shake Harry's hand.

"Dan Granger, nice to meet you Harry." He said in a friendly tone. Harry was not used to adults outside of the magical world treating him with much decency at all, but he proffered his hand and met Dan's handshake.

Dan flipped Harry's hand around and laughed. "Now there is something I didn't expect! You have callouses on your hands!" Dan chuckled again. "Doesn't magic kind of take away the need to have rough hands?" He asked, letting Harry's hand fall back to his side.

"I play Quidditch, so I have to hold on to the broom pretty tight." Harry said, only realizing afterwards that what he said didn't make any sense. "It's a sport where you fly on brooms."

"Wow, you'll have to tell me more about it, Hermione has mentioned it, but hasn't gone into detail. It's unfortunate that even after all this time, I know so little about the magical world." Dan said, seating himself again. It appeared that whatever reservations that Jane had, she hadn't shared them with Dan yet, Harry was grateful for that much at least.

Dinner was uneventful. Dan and Jane asked Harry all sorts of things about what kind of classes he was taking and which ones he didn't share with Hermione. They seemed amused when he regaled them with some unfortunately true, stories from Divination. It was one of the rare classes that they didn't get to ask Hermione about.

"There isn't any stock in any of that rubbish." Hermione said, waving her hand dismissively.

"Oh hush, just because it isn't real, doesn't mean it isn't interesting!" Jane said swatting at Hermione's shoulder in a playful way. Hermione huffed in response and turned her attention back to her plate.

The rest of dinner passed amicably. So much so that Harry almost forgot Jane's warning from earlier.

"Dan, why don't you take the kids into the other room and get settled, I'll make a few cups of tea and then we can discuss the rest of the weekend." Jane said with a smile.

"Sounds like a great plan." Dan said and led Hermione and Harry into the den where they all settled into the couches facing the television.

"So Harry, I feel like I know so much about you from Hermione's letters. It's great to hear some of the stories from your side rather than Hermione's." Dan said leaning back in his chair.

"Daddy, I don't write about Harry that often." Hermione said moving her hair so that it fell over some of her blush.

"Actually out of 477 letters, Harry is mentioned in 468 of them." Dan said as he smiled. Harry felt his jaw fall a little bit. Turning to Hermione confirmed that she had turned a full shade of Weasley orange from her neck to her hairline.

"You counted?" Hermione stammered out.

Jane came into the room with a noted lack of tea and a large cardboard box in her hands instead.

"Oh yes, when we started digging a few weeks ago, we decided that data would be the best way to get to the bottom of things." Jane placed the box on the coffee table in front of them.

Hermione immediately slid off the couch and reached for the lid of the box throwing the lid off. Inside the box was stacks of letters, and stacks of newspapers.

Stacks of Daily Prophets.

Hermione's entire face went from the orange to a pale grey color in a matter of seconds. "When did you get a subscription to the Daily Prophet?" Hermione whispered.

"About a week after you came home." Jane answered simply. "Imagine my surprise when Harry's name was in the newspaper almost as much as he was in your letters."

"The Prophet has been obsessed with me for years. That doesn't much surprise me." Harry said, trying to deflect some.

"Yes well, reading some of the recent reports in there, matching them up with some of the news reports from around the area there were quite a few connections that were pretty obvious. There aren't as many gas leaks around as the news would have us think it would appear." Dan said, leaning over to grab a bottle of liquor and a tumbler glass.

"It was also fairly obvious that whomever this "You-Know-Who" terrorist is, there is a connection to Harry in all the reports. Harry Potter, Albus Dumbledore, and "You-Know-Who" all appear repeatedly in most of the reports." Jane said with a relaxed expression on her face. Harry was learning so much about Hermione in this moment he was trying to file it all away for later. Her parents approached problems and questions the same way that Hermione did, with single minded ferocity. "The final nail in the coffin so to speak was when we started matching some of the dates in the Daily Prophet to local papers. I've been spending some time after work gathering information from the newspapers in the library."

Hermione's love for libraries and her apparent fear on her face right now almost made Harry laugh. He imagined she felt completely betrayed by this local library. For her part, Hermione just kept making confused noises, completely at a loss for words. Jane calmly put a stack of recent newspapers next to the Prophets. Circles and notes scribbled in the margins in red and black ink. The mystery of one Hermione Granger was starting to unravel for Harry.

"So the question we are left with is, what connects my daughter," Dan gestured to Hermione. "Her friend," motioning to Harry. "And a terrorist so terrible that the newspaper won't even print his name?"

Silence reigned supreme in a moment that seemed like it would never end.

"He's the one who murdered my parents." Harry blurted out. Hermione's parents deserved to know the truth about what he had gotten her into. So many people had been kept in the dark for so long, Harry didn't have the heart to keep secrets anymore. Too many people had died with their secrets to the detriment of others, Harry wasn't going to participate in that.

Dan and Jane narrowed in on him. "Why?" Simple question, complex answer.

"I don't know what they have printed in the newspaper recently, but the terrorists name is Tom Riddle. He created a name for himself as Lord Voldemort. The things he did in the eighties were so bad that people don't even like saying his name to this day. Cowards that they are." Harry said.

"Ok, so he was a terrorist twenty years ago, why did he target your parents in particular?" Dan asked.

"What makes you think..." Hermione stepped in. Harry didn't give her a chance.

"He was afraid of me." Harry said.

"Harry! Professor Dumbledore said..."

"I know what he said and I don't care! He died keeping his secrets and look what is going to cost the rest of us? If you can't trust your parents with this, then Tom already won." Harry said not breaking eye contact with Hermione.

She seemed to deflate a bit. "Years ago, during Voldemort's rise to power he was gaining strength and it didn't seem like anyone was going to stop him. A prophecy was made."

"You just said that that kind of stuff was bullshit?" Dan said critically.

"Yes, but the bigger problem with Divination is that there are people that believe it word for word. Even if it doesn't make any sense." Hermione said putting a hand to her forehead. "The details aren't important, but a prophecy was made that said that there would be a baby born that would have the power to defeat the dark lord. Voldemort took that to mean that it was Harry and went after his family."

"So Voldemort was so afraid of some words that he went after a baby to prevent himself from being defeated." Dan took a long sip from his glass. "You know if I hadn't seen you teleport from place to place a few hours ago, I would tell you that this was crazy talk out of a fantasy novel."

"Tom is an egomaniac, he doesn't just want to win, he wants the world to know his name. So even the slightest threat to his power was something he took seriously. My parents went into hiding to get away from him and protect him. But he came after us anyways. They were betrayed by one of their friends and when Tom came for us, my dad fought him to give my mother time to run up the stairs. After Tom had killed my father, he went upstairs and killed my mother. Then he tried to kill me but something happened and instead of me dying, he disappeared. The world thought he was dead and I was left with a scar on my forehead and no family." Harry said dispassionately. He recounted the events void of emotion. His flashes of memory were enough to send his emotions into turmoil, but he refused to think about that right now.

"I'm so sorry Harry. Your parents must have loved you a great deal." Jane said softly placing a hand on his arm. He attempted a smile of gratitude and ignored the mist in his eyes.

"Thank you." Harry said quietly when he trusted his voice to speak. Hermione placed a hand on his and he felt the warmth of her touch on his hand.

"So the terrorist attacks that we are seeing in the paper are connected to the terrorist that killed your parents? But you said he disappeared when he hit you with the curse." Dan said with fingers steepled in front of his face.

"He came back." Hermione said, finally deciding to join the conversation. "He used incredibly dark magic to keep himself alive. At the end of the tournament in our 4th year, he kidnapped Harry and did a ritual to regain his body."

Harry winced at the memory.

"So he was successful in finding a way to not die that night." Dan summarized quickly.

"More or less, more specific information than that could put you in danger." Harry said, trying to draw the line somewhere.

"Ok, fair enough, let's be more specific then. Have the different incidents that have happened at Hogwarts, are they tied to this Tom Riddle person?" Jane asked shrewdly, darting her eyes between himself and Hermione trying to gauge their reactions.

Silence.

"I'm going to take that as a yes." Dan said taking a long draw from the drink he had poured for himself. "I would ask more questions, but it seems like we have tapped the subject of our confusion. Why don't you tell us the REAL story of the past few years of your schooling." Dan said, saying it with such authority that there was no getting out of the conversation.

"Well, hold on. Before that, I think it is fair for us to know WHY you lied to us about it Hermione?" Jane said calmly. "I don't like being lied to, but I'm starting to understand more of what is happening her, I just want to know why."

"I didn't want you to take me out of Hogwarts. There are thousands of muggle born students across the country that are in danger because of Voldemort. He would exterminate us like bugs if he got the chance. I have, and had in the past, a chance to help in that fight. I didn't want to risk you taking me away from that, or from helping Harry." She said staring directly at her shoes. Sounding more and more like a scared child the longer she spoke. Then her shoulders squared and she drew a deep breath.

Looking up she locked eyes with her mother. "There is a war going on, and I have a chance to help change the tide of it. I have to do this for all the others that can't. I am in a position where I can help Harry finish this and kill Voldemort for good. I can't turn away from that responsibility. Deceiving you ate me up inside, but I needed to keep you safe." She finished, sitting up strong now. Confident in the fight she had chosen. "I hope you can forgive me."

"I'm not thrilled with it, but I understand and I forgive you. I don't think I would have known what to do either." Dan said leaning back and finishing off the first glass he had poured and immediately started another. Leaning over he pulled another glass from the side table and he filled that as well handing it to Harry. "Drink up son, you look like a strong breeze could knock you over."

Harry took the glass and stared at it. He had snuck a few sips of firewhisky once or twice when the other guys in the dorm had brought it in, but he had never really liked the taste. Not wanting to be rude though, he raised it to his lips to take a quick nip. The liquid burned, but Harry found that the distraction of the burning took his mind off the problems that were flying around the room and he found himself grateful for Dan's kindness.

"Thanks, that does help a little bit." Harry said, resting the glass on his knee.

"Well don't drink it too fast or it won't be very helpful anymore." Dan said with a snicker.

Jane shot a glare at her husband. He was clearly trying to lighten the tension a bit. His daughter declaring that she was about to fight in a war was probably more than he had bargained for when the conversation started.

"So tell us the real story of what happened at Hogwarts the past few years and then we can discuss what that means from here." Jane said pragmatically.

"Well, it really starts with me being an ass." Harry said as he proceeded to tell his story of the train ride and not knowing what to do with the incredibly bossy twelve year old that he met that day.

"Harry, language. And you weren't being an ass. Ron was being an ass." Hermione said smiling slightly at him. Her face hadn't gained its color back quite yet, but her smile seemed to bring some of the glow back.

Hermione proceeded to tell the rest of the story of their first year. Her memory being much better than Harry's was that far back. The rest of the evening was spent in a similar fashion. They went year by year telling the stories of what they had already been through, trading off for different parts where the other left off.

Dan slowly got more and more rosy in the cheeks, Jane's tea was reheated and went cold again half a dozen times while the two teens recounted the beginnings of the war they had been fighting in for the past six years.


	2. Chapter 2: Opia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Forgot to put a disclaimer on the last chapter:
> 
> I don't own any of these characters and anything other than the plot belongs to JK Rowling.
> 
> Credit for the Chapter titles: Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows

Chapter 2: Opia:

_The ambiguous intensity of looking someone in the eye, which can feel simultaneously invasive and vulnerable._

**Saturday, July 27th 1997**

* * *

The minutes turned into hours as the Grangers and Harry talked about all the things that had actually happened during the last few years. When the story was finally over and Harry had recounted his last few minutes with Professor Dumbledore the room was quiet. He skimmed over the Horcruxes and their mission, only saying that he had 'been working on a project with the Headmaster'.

The story did not have a good ending at the end of six years of trouble. Having the Death Eaters break into the Castle and murder their headmaster while a bunch of teenagers made life difficult for the Eaters. It was hardly confidence inspiring. The adults hadn't done a fraction of what the students had done during that time. That didn't sit well with the Grangers.

"So you can see why I didn't want you to take me out of school." Hermione said finally some time around two in the morning.

"Well I would argue with you, but after hearing that, I would have taken you out of Hogwarts in a heartbeat." Dan said calmly. "So what do you think will be different this year with the Headmaster gone?"

"I don't think it much matters to me anymore." Harry said quietly. "Without Dumbledore there isn't anyone that Voldemort is afraid of anymore. He won't need to be cautious. If I even survive to the end of the summer, I wouldn't go back to Hogwarts, it brings too many people into danger." Her parents must be wishing that he wasn't in their house right now. They were probably wishing that he had never met their daughter.

"I'm sure you hate me right now." Harry said, being used to the feeling of being the object of someone's loathing. "I can only say that if it wasn't for Hermione, I would have died years ago. She has saved my life more times than I can count. The only reason I am sitting here right now is because your daughter is the smartest, kindest, bravest woman I have ever met. I would died in my first year of Hogwarts if Hermione hadn't figured everything out in time. At twelve years old she saved an entire school by being brilliant and insanely brave."

"All I did was solve a basic logic puzzle." Hermione said, her cheeks tinged with pink. Still trying to push away her accomplishments, just like she had done that day.

"That...wasn't the part I was talking about." Harry said. Already regretting what he was about to say. "You told me, that you thought I was a great wizard. 'Books and Cleverness, there are more important things. Friendship and bravery.' I realized that even though I was scared, for the first time I had friends, that you cared about me. That's why I went into that room to get the stone. Because you said I could."

Now, the silence was heavy. "I could never hate you Harry." Hermione whispered.

"Why!? You should! I hate myself. I hate how much danger I have dragged you into. I hate how many times you have been injured. I hate that there have been life or death situations we have been in because of me." Harry said in frustration.

Hermione's face was rolling through different emotions as the moments dragged. She was confused, upset, hurt and determined all at the same time. "I need to use the restroom. I'll be back in a moment." She said as she slipped out of the room.

"It doesn't sound like you forced Hermione to do any of these things Harry. It sounds like she followed you gladly into it." Jane said in a comforting tone. Dan watched in curiosity. Still processing the things that the teenagers had told them.

Harry stood. "You don't get it! It isn't that I forced her. I hate myself because of how much I need her. When I found the wizarding world, I was just like her. Hope beyond hope that I had finally found a place where I could be accepted for what I was rather than shunned for being different. Seeing Hogwarts for the first time, holding a wand for the first time, those were among my happiest memories. Until I met Hermione. Do you know that she was the first person that I ever remember hugging me?" He paused, taking a breath. He wasn't sure why he was still talking, but the words continued to fall over themselves. Damn whatever alcohol Dan had given him.

"Everything I've ever done has been because Hermione was there by my side through it. They think that I am some savior, but I'm not doing this for them. Hermione gave me something to fight for. I may have to kill to save some, but I would die before I let Hermione get hurt. I'm sorry that's all I can offer. I know it isn't as much as she deserves."

There were a hundred reasons why he hadn't been able to answer her letters over the course of the summer, but the truth of the matter was, they were just excuses not to face the truth of what he had just said. Truth that he had never been more aware of, or more terrified as he had been in the past few weeks. He was torn between wanting to send her away from this war, shelter her from its horrors. However, Harry knew that he wouldn't stand a chance of winning this fight without her, and when he lost, Voldemort would still come after her. He would hunt her down for sport, just to make the memory of Harry bleed some more. Harry realized he had tears on his cheeks, his emotions rolling smoothly from one to the next sped along by the drink.

Winning was the only way to save her from that future. As the tears slipped down his cheeks he again looked them both in turn. Daniel seemed shocked and impassive at the same time. Jane however had a hand to her mouth and was crying along with him. "Oh Harry..." Jane whispered as she stood and walked over to him, wrapping him in a hug. It wasn't like Mrs. Weasleys hugs. While her heart was always in the right place, it was always the hug of a mother that still saw you as a small child that needed to be sheltered. Harry loved her hugs, but at the same time, knew that he could never quite take the comfort in them that he needed because it would only reinforce the idea that he was a small child that needed to be protected.

This hug was...different. There was nothing motivating it other than to comfort and show love. Harry imagined that this was what it would feel like if his own mother had been here. Supportive, caring and understanding. "I think I can take it from here mum." Hermione whispered from behind Harry. Jane nodded with a small smile on her face as Hermione knelt next to Harry's chair. "You will never be alone in this fight ever again Harry." She said catching his downcast eyes. Her steely determination sparked something in Harry that he wasn't quite sure of.

"How much of that did you hear?" He whispered thickly.

"Enough." As she pulled him into her arms. Harry went willingly and broke completely. For the first time he wept for the people who had gone before him. For the parents that he would never know, the hugs that he would never take comfort in from his own mother. For the advice he would never receive from the Godfather he so desperately wanted to know better. For the twinkling blue eyes he would never see again, inspecting him from over half moon spectacles. All those things and more, Harry wept. Despite his wracking sobs, they remained silent as Vernon had taught him. Hermione simply held him. Held the 'savior of the wizarding world' as he cried for the losses he had already suffered in his short life.

After a few minutes, Harry's grief subsided and he managed to control himself once more. Hermione had been unable to keep her tears to herself as she held him, so when Harry raised his head, it was tear strained eyes that met. "I didn't mean to make you cry Hermione." Harry said softly as he raised a hand to wipe the tears from her cheeks.

"When friends hurt, it's ok to cry." She said sincerely. He searched her eyes, trying to sense if it was a meaningless platitude that she was giving him. Finding no trace of insincerity in her eyes he nodded slowly. As the waves of his emotions started to subside, Harry felt the grief and pain become replaced with determination, it almost felt like there was something leaving him, but being replaced with something stronger at the same time. Similar to the 'monster' that he had felt in his chest last year when he had seen Ginny in the common room all those nights, the feeling that pushed through him now was all encompassing. Like a war raged on inside of him, with one side being decidedly stronger than the other. The monster quelled and the feelings of inadequacy and pain fell away with it, replaced with a lightness that he had not felt in years. Her brown eyes locked with his emerald ones, and in that moment, Harry started to feel the strength he would need for the fight that was to come.

Unknown to either of the young adults in the room, Harry hands had started to glow the longer he looked into Hermione's eyes. Jane and Daniel shared a long knowing look. A lot of information had been dropped in their lap in a very short period of time. Mr. Granger seemed to find his voice finally. "Well it would appear that there is nothing we can do about Hermione joining this war, she already has. So the only question left is. What can we do to help?"

The house was quiet. The wee hours of the morning always provided a sense of peace and ease to Hermione when she really wanted to think about something. Not being able to sleep after the families long conversation, she swept down the stairs and padded into the kitchen to fix herself a cup of tea. Something about a hot cup of tea in the darkness of the pre-dawn hours had always allowed her to focus more than anything else. It was something she missed during the months living in a castle that never quite seemed to sleep completely. The lack of activity was something she would always miss during the long months away from home. Tonight however, she took advantage of the fact that everyone was finally asleep.

The guest room didn't adjoin to her room, but they did share a wall. For a long time she listened to Harry roll back and forth. Hours had passed before it seemed that he had finally fallen asleep. Hermione knew that he was emotionally drained, but that didn't appear to equate to falling asleep in a timely manner. She didn't blame him, being drained was something she was used to these days, but that didn't stop the swirl of thoughts that constantly plagued her all hours of the night and day. Regardless, Hermione knew that she wouldn't be getting much sleep before the sun rose, not after the roller coaster she had been on this evening.

She stepped quietly over to the stove to retrieve a pot to heat the water. "I already have a cup here for you dear." Her mother said softly from the darkness near the kitchen table.

Surprised, Hermione spun wand in hand, the faint red glow of a stunner humming on the tip of her wand ready to find its target. In this case, the glow illuminated the soft features of Jane Granger. "Mum, you can't scare me like that!" Hermione whispered frantically as she reeled her magic back in as the wands tip flickered out. She reached over and flipped the light on so the faint glow of the stove light would illuminate the kitchen enough for her to see her mother clearly.

Jane nodded absently, silently apologizing for scaring her daughter. "How long sweetie?" She asked.

Hermione felt a slight blush rise up in her cheeks. She hoped the dimness of the room would hide it enough to not be noticed. "I don't know what you mean Mum." Hermione said evasively.

"Don't even bother playing that with me. We have read letters from you for years now, and every single one of them has circled around Harry Potter. You may not have told us the entire truth about him, but it really didn't matter did it? He was the center of your school life. How long have you been in love with him?"

Hermione blanched as she sat down and wrapped her small hands around the warm cup of tea. She stared into its murky surface for a few minutes. "I don't know mum, it was a long time ago though. Probably some time in our 3rd year." She finally answered. "It's just never been...the right time. There was always something that was in the way. Either we were fighting for our lives over one reason or another or he was interested in someone else." She huffed as she sank further into the chair.

It was true, the time to tell Harry her feelings had never quite seemed right. She wanted him to be happy and any time they weren't fighting for their lives, it had appeared as if he had found a home for his affections in someone else. First Cho and then Ginny, the stunning quidditch players were the ones that had caught Harry's eye. Granted, things had never lasted very long with those, but regardless, they were the ones that caught Harry's attention when he had enough breathing room to think about such things.

This was all of course not to mention the fiasco that the last school year had been. Something had been so wrong this past year. Hermione felt like ever since the funeral, she had started to get more and more of an understanding for what was going on around herself and Harry for the past while. Their behavior had changed quite a bit, granted most of it could be chalked up to teenage hormones, but not all of it. Nothing had seemed right last year.

Jane sipped on her tea carefully, appraising her daughter in an attempt to figure out what to say to the adult that was now sitting where her teenager had left the year before.

Hermione spoke again before Jane got the chance to ask anymore questions. "I've known for a long time that he has been special to me, but I have also realized that he didn't see me as anything more than a friend. For the majority of the time that we have been in school, he and I have been the best of friends, but nothing more than that. There was a few times where I thought he was starting to see more, but they ebbed and flowed like everything else. Ron on the other hand, he and I have always fought and bickered, so I figured opposites attract right? For a while I thought he was interested, so last year I made up my mind to move on from Harry, after all I didn't want to put any undue pressure on Harry for something he didn't seem to want, he deserved better than that. Sadly the minute I seemed to attempt to transfer some of my feelings to Ron...he just behaved like a bigger git than ever before! Which was something of a talent let me tell you!" Hermione realized she was rambling, but she didn't care.

There was a part of her that strived to know why everything had fallen apart last year. Something had been different and it wasn't just the fact that she had been trying to show Ron that she was interested in a relationship. Just like any other problem in the life of Hermione Granger, talking it through was part of the thinking process. Her mother had always been a good listener, and before she had left for Hogwarts, Jane had always been Hermione's bouncing board for ideas as they progressed their way through her head.

"It all seemed to come to a boiling point right after Ron ended up in the hospital wing from being poisoned. He was in there for a few days and I sat with him, waiting for him to wake up. I only left his side to sleep, I was so worried for him that I couldn't even bring myself to eat anything. I think it was then that I realized that I was worried for him, I wasn't paralyzed with the fear like I am when it was Harry laying in the bed."

Jane broke in, "But you just said that you couldn't eat while he was sick?"

"I didn't eat because that is what I do when Harry is ill or injured. That was part of what tipped me off to it being different. I love Ron like a brother, I do, but with Harry...it's different. While Ron was asleep I was worried for him, and scared. When it's Harry, I can't function. I can't eat, I don't sleep, I am consumed with fear. I realized that Ron really did deserve better than that. He didn't deserve my misplaced feelings despite how noble a cause I thought I was serving by throwing myself at him." For the remainder of the year, Ron's actions had hurt her feelings, but not because she felt something for him, mainly because it seemed like he had no care for how she MIGHT feel in those situations. Feelings for the boy or not, it was always hurtful to be forgotten that you were in fact, a girl.

Jane nodded, seemingly approving of the answer. "I assume that no one knows what you are telling me right now. These sound like the kinds of things that you normally keep to yourself much to your detriment," her mother rolled here eyes slightly at this.

"Remember when you were a little girl and you didn't want to tell anyone that the girls at school had broken your science fair project? You stayed up all night trying to rebuild it without waking your father and I up. Do you remember what happened?"

"You and Dad did wake up and found me, the three of us finished rebuilding it before the fair the next morning. The looks on their faces were priceless...I can still taste the victory of that morning." Hermione said with a smile splitting her face.

"Do you think that you would have been able to rebuild the project all alone that night?" Her mother pressed.

"Maybe." Hermione said stubbornly. She had enough common sense to see where her mother was taking the conversation with all the subtly of a battery ram.

Her mother laughed quietly. "Maybe so, but the three of us worked as a team and got it done on time. Because you told us what was going on. It's important to include others in these kinds of things. Especially those we care for deeply. Don't you think Harry and Ron would benefit from knowing some of the things you just told me?"

"What good would that do? It would give something else for Harry to feel guilty about, and something for Ron to feel inadequate about." Hermione said waspishly, trying to poke holes in her mothers argument before they could take full form.

"Yes, or, you might be giving Harry something more to fight for, and you might bring some closure and compassion to your friendship with Ron. I don't think I need spell out how and why those things would benefit you..." Jane let the sentence fall for effect, trying to let Hermione fill in some of the blanks on her own.

"Now isn't the time Mum," Hermione pressed back, "Harry is dating Ginny, Ron's younger sister! I can't do that to all of them, it wouldn't be fair."

"You never know how much time you have left Hermione Jane, is it a secret you are willing to take to your grave? Or worse, to his?"

* * *

**Sunday, July 28th 1997**

The gentle clicking and clacking of silverware hitting plates drew Harry to the kitchen the next morning. He had finally fallen asleep, but as usual he had difficulty staying asleep. It seemed that since the failed attempt in the Ministry of Magic, Voldemort hadn't attempted to see into Harry's mind again. Harry assumed that it was because he was either still sore about the fact that Harry was able to best him in another mind game, or because of the pain it had caused him. Either way, Harry was grateful that his dreams again were his own. Nightmares in their own right, but his own nightmares at least.

He seated himself at the last place at the table available, and attempted to meet the eyes of the three Grangers surrounding him. After dancing back and forth between the adults at the table and chancing a glance at Hermione, he decided that his eyes were better pointed at his table mat. The night before had been one of the first times that Harry had ever really let his emotions show like that. There had been private times in his life when he had grieved for those he lost, but those had been where he could keep all of those things inside and not have to share them with others the next morning.

As much as he liked the Grangers thus far, his concern was starting to over reach his care for the family. He had been in the house for roughly 12 hours and as far as Harry was concerned, every hour that he spent in the house was another hour that Voldemort would tack on to the level of torture he would inflict upon the Grangers. Granted, everything Hermione had already said was staggeringly true. She had made herself a prime target these past few years as well. It certainly wasn't as if Voldemort didn't know her name. The three of them certainly hadn't kept a low profile since starting Hogwarts. All of that besides the point, Hermione and her family were targets and Harry spending time in their house didn't do much to assuage that fact.

Their willingness to help however had surprised Harry the night previous. Just because they didn't have magic coursing through their blood like the Weasleys, or even himself or Hermione, didn't mean that they were less capable than any other like minded adult. They saw Voldemort the same way that the rest of Harry's friends did, as an insane sociopath hell bent on the destruction of the known world. Their understanding of what he could do was not limited by their lack of understanding about magic. The language of a sociopathic terrorist such as Voldemort apparently transcended the boundaries between the magical and non-magical folk. Harry had noticed that for the most part, anyone with a strongly functioning frontal lobe managed to understand that who your parents were didn't determine anything about the level of worth you had as a person.

All of these things were ironic to Harry ever since he had learned more about Tom Riddle. It was as if someone told you that Hitler was not just a Jew, but a Rabbi that preached at Sabbath every Saturday. Yet that was what Voldemort represented. A half blood, teaching other pure bloods that magical blood was the only blood to be valued.

"Jane, Daniel…I'm sorry for my outbursts last night. This past year has been very difficult for me and part of that difficulty has been between Hermione and I. Dumping all of that on you last night is no excuse however." Harry said, still facing firmly down at the table.

"Son, I think you need to understand that there is a time and place for emotions like you displayed last night." Harry winced at Daniels words. His cheeks flushed for a moment. A cursory glance over at Hermione caught her half way about to say something to her father. Her eyes glinted a bit as she prepared to cut his next words to shreds. However, he soldiered on before she got the chance.

"Seeing your Headmaster get murdered, all the while your closest friends fought for their lives against murderers, feeling the weight of everything you have known fall down on your shoulders…all the while having no one to speak to about any of these things? There is a time and place for emotions like you showed last night, and if anyone deserved that time, it is you. Trust me you have nothing to apologize for." Daniel finished softly. Hermione bit her words back and looked pleased with the outcome of her fathers speech.

"Thank you sir. I can't tell you how much that means to me. My relatives were not the most…sensitive people in the world." Harry said trying to smile through the oversimplification of his childhood.

"Harry, I think what you need to take from this right now is that we are all here to support you. Hermione believes in you a great deal to follow you into all of this. I would be lying if I told you that I didn't want to bundle her up and run away to America to take her away from all of this. However, it also seems that this…Voldemort…would follow her there eventually. That is of course assuming that I was able to keep Hermione anywhere other than exactly where she wanted to be." Jane said, stirring her tea absentmindedly. "Besides, can't you all teleport or something? It wouldn't really matter where I took Hermione now that I think of it. But that is getting off topic. The point I'm trying to make stands. Hermione has backed you in this fight, and the Grangers come as a package deal so we back you too. I have some ideas on how we can better help you through this, but I haven't fleshed them out fully yet." She finished smiling.

"Thanks Mum, but Harry isn't some horse I've decided to bet on in a race. Him and I, well; him, Ron and I have a war to fight. Dumbledore left us with a mission that might be the last and only key to destroying Voldemort for good. We can't tell you what it is, it is safer that way, but know that we have a 'plan' going forward." Hermione said seeming to get excited about the prospect of having a plan to go about all this with.

"Remind me why you three were the only ones who knew about the grand scheme to destroy him and none of the other teachers or colleagues of Dumbledore knew anything about it?" Daniel said poking at his eggs more vigorously than they required.

"Because this is Harry's fight now, and Dumbledore knew that he wasn't going to do it without Ron and I, so we were the natural choices. Our ages didn't matter to Dumbledore honestly. Harry has faced Voldemort more times than any one else alive, and has always come out the other side. We are all putting our faith in Harry, and I don't think it is misplaced at all." Hermione finished with a smile, placing her hand on Harry's knee.

Harry smiled back hoping that he could convey his gratitude for her support. "I think what is important now is setting up a game plan for the next few months. We have a lot to get accomplished and not a lot of ideas of how to go about this. Jane, Daniel, you realize that you will both be targets the minute that Hermione doesn't show up for Hogwarts September first?" Harry didn't fail to notice Hermione wince a bit.

"So you three aren't going back there for the school year then?" Daniel asked slowly.

"No, I don't think I can. Of course I'm not making any decisions for Hermione or Ron, but I can't see myself going back to classes all the while wondering who Voldemort was torturing because I hadn't ended this yet." Harry said with a bit more resolve than he felt. Jane nodded along with Harry's statement.

"Think about it Dan, would you have been able to go to back to school if you knew something like that in the back of your mind?" She said gently placing a hand over his.

"No I suppose not. I just wished that they would have been able to finish their education…." Dan said, trailing off.

"I really don't want this to drag on any longer than it has to. But I feel that there really isn't much of a choice. Whatever this is, is going to take exactly as long as it has to. I can't be restricted to Hogwarts during that time, as much as I would like to. Despite everything that happened, I always did feel safe there." Harry said resolutely.

Hermione appeared amused when he said that. "You know that cumulatively that while you were at Hogwarts you have almost died more than any other time in your life. I find it ironic that you felt the safest while you were there." She softly laughed as she thought about it.

"Yeah I know, but no matter what, Hogwarts will always be my first home, and that means that I feel something special there that I can't find anywhere else, despite the dangers that have come with it." Harry said, thinking about what it felt like to walk through the halls of Hogwarts for the first time, he was truly going to miss being there this year.

"Well, the rest of the weekend here could be fun, there are some different things to do in the area, and I know your relatives never took you anywhere nice in all of England." Hermione said bitterly. "Your birthday isn't until Thursday, so I imagine that you will want to go back to the Dursley's until then?"

"Well want is a strong word," Harry said shifting uncomfortably in his chair. Mention of his childhood sometimes rolled off his shoulders ok, but other times it made him insanely uneasy. Things had happened while he was growing up that Hermione never knew about and he didn't really want her to. In fact there was a number of things from growing up with the Dursleys that no one knew about, and he wanted to keep in that way. Life had not been easy for the Boy-Who-Lived before the age of eleven. Blood protections be damned, those hadn't protected him from things inside the house.

"But I think I should be there when the wards break. Dumbledore always wanted me to be there when they did, so I suppose as a final wish to him, I should be there."

Hermione nodded in agreement. "I suppose that would be the respectful thing to do…" She trailed off like she wanted to say more but wasn't sure of how. Harry didn't press her. Talk of his home life was something he attempted to avoid at all costs.

"Well, how about this? We spend the rest of today relaxing, there isn't any homework to do…" another awkward pause from Mr. Granger, "so you two might as well just relax today. Tonight we can go out to a nice meal and then tomorrow we can find some fun things to do around town? How does that sound?" Daniel asked trying to keep the mood light.

Harry felt himself tense up for a moment. In a split second he was painfully aware of the clothes he was wearing and how his hair must look. He looked one step away from a homeless man. Harry was so used to dressing like this that he hadn't even thought about the fact that the Grangers might notice something like the state of his dress.

"Harry, if that doesn't sound like something you want to do, just say so, we can find a different plan…." Daniel must have noticed his reaction, but was attempting to skirt it.

"No it's not that, I would love to do that. More than anything really. But I don't think it's safe for me to stay here much longer. There is no telling what would happen if some of the Death Eaters found out that Hermione had Apparated me here." Harry said, shifting in his chair. "I've been here too long as it is."

"I wish you didn't have to go back there, it's not like they want you there." Hermione said, not noticing the eyebrows raise on both her parents faces.

"I know, I don't want to be there either." Harry said, not looking forward to the long silences in his room. Though the mirror would help with that?

"Well at least they don't have bars on your windows now." Hermione said cracking a bit of a smile at him. She was clearly trying to make him feel better. Harry however had a perfect view of the elder Grangers facial features. They had for sure heard and understood what Hermione had just said.

The look on Harry's face made it very clear that she had not made him feel any better. The blush that encompassed his entire face, made it very clear that she had made an error in judgment about what Harry wanted to share. Furthermore, from the look on Hermione's face, she realized that she had said a bit too much for his comfort. While Hermione was one of the most intellectually gifted women of her age, and magically clearly as gifted, she had never been strong in the social areas. Some from not having enough friends while she was growing up and some from being too intellectual to think on those kinds of levels.

Harry cast his glance around the room, and then finally settled his eyes on his lap. Looking down rather than meet anyones eyes in the room. "Oh Harry, I'm so sorry that was insensitive of me. I just wanted…damn. I'm sorry Harry, I shouldn't have said that." Hermione whispered.

"No, Hermione, it's fine." Harry's outward appearance said that it was anything but fine, however that appeared to be beside the point. He took a deep breath and raised his eyes to meet the other Grangers. "Life before Hogwarts wasn't…pleasant for me. My first letter was addressed to Harry Potter, the Cupboard under the Stairs." He took another rattling breath, attempting to work up the strength to say something.

"Harry, as Doctors, Dan and I are trained to spot these kinds of things and there are things that can be done to hold your relatives accountable. Have you ever spoken to anyone about it before?" Jane asked, leaning forward.

"No, I never really wanted to talk about it. When I was at school it was easier just to pretend that life before Hogwarts wasn't real."

Harry felt the need to keep speaking. It was the first time that someone had asked about his home life. Ever. The Weasley's didn't think it was concerning that there were bars on his windows. They never asked about his home life. All of a sudden, a dam burst inside of him and the words came forth nearly unbidden. "I didn't know my name was Harry until I was 5 years old. Until then I thought my name was Freak or Boy. Vernon had never addressed me as Harry until I had to start going to school. Even then it was with a lot of resentment. In the Dursley home, I wasn't allowed to ask questions. Namely about my parents. Until I was eleven, I thought they had died in a car accident and that my father was an unemployed drunk. That was what the Dursleys taught me." Jane looked crestfallen, Daniel looked completely enraged and Hermione was starting to cry.

This was all news to even Hermione. Harry had shared parts of his life growing up with her, but never had he gone into much detail. There was clearly quite some details that he had left out of their last conversation about the topic. Speaking some of this aloud was ripping him apart inside, but it seemed like he couldn't stop himself.

"The first time I did accidental magic, I can barely remember it, but what I do remember was that Vernon hit me with his belt and broke my wrist when I raised my hands to block it. That made him madder so I spent the rest of the week in the cupboard. Petunia gave me a cup of water sometime during the day, but that was all. I don't think I was even allowed to leave to go to the bathroom," Harry winced and felt himself burn with embarrassment. "Thankfully, my wrist did heal itself throughout the week. I think it was my second bit of accidental magic." Harry said.

"My life growing up with them was pure hell. I didn't even know it was different from other kids lives until I went to school. I knew my cousin got treated different from me, but I thought that all kids without parents were treated the same way. You can see why Hogwarts has always been home to me. Even with the constant death threats every year, it was more of a home than anything else I had experienced until then. When I became friends with Ron and Hermione…that pretty much sealed it." Harry looked back and forth from the faces. Jane had tears running down her cheeks, Dan was pale and had a blank expression on his face. Hermione was openly sobbing into her hands. This morning was turning out to be as bad as the night before. He closed his mouth realizing that he wasn't making her parents feel any better about spending time with him. His natural fear of the way adults saw him started pounding behind his ears.

"But you had the Weasley's! They showed you what a family was like." Hermione choked out between hiccups.

Harry reached out to Hermione before her parents could say anything in response. "Hermione, look at me, please." She looked up attempting to choke back her sobs. "You and Ron were the reasons that Hogwarts truly became home to me at first. Later though, that changed. Do you know why?" Harry said, even through all this attempting to comfort Hermione.

"No, why." She sniffled.

"Ron and his family always did their best to take me in and make me feel like part of the family. I appreciate all that they do for me, and I do care for them in their own way, but I was still never part of their family fully. I could never be. I'm Harry Potter, not Harry Weasley." He said smiling softly. "They all see me as something I'm not at times. Molly sees me as a child, Ginny sees me as a hero, Arthur sees me as someone who he owes life debts to, Ron sees me as the hero to his sidekick, and the rest see me as a friend. Those are all wonderful things in their own way, but none of those kinds of things make them my family."

"You see me as Harry. That's all. Harry. And that was all that I ever wanted. Someone to see me as who I was," The truth of the words started to ring harder and harder in his head the more he spoke. Like the things he was saying reflected the deepest part of himself. "Not who I was going to save. Not anything other than just Harry. I didn't want to be Freak, I didn't want to be 'The Boy Who lived', I just wanted to be Harry." He smiled a bit. He needed her to know the truth of this, because if he was going to die before this was all over, he wanted Hermione to be certain, the place that she had in his life. Even if it still meant that he would have to leave her behind.

"You were the first person who gave that to me. So always remember, that despite everything else they all are important to me, but Hogwarts was home because that is where you were. You are where I consider home Hermione. So please don't cry, there isn't anything about my past you can change." Harry said softly, trying not to break eye contact with her. He hated his past enough, the last thing he wanted was for his story to cause her pain like this.

"Oh Harry!" Hermione said as she threw her arms around him. She was still crying a bit, but it did sound like she had slipped from sadness to happy tears. Though Harry's limited experience with females left him still kind of confused. "I think that is the nicest thing someone has ever said to me!" She said while pressing her face into his shoulder. Dan looked like he wanted to say something about the displays of affection that had just occurred, but he didn't get the chance.

That was when things started happening very quickly. A bright blue glow appeared around Harry. Hermione jumped back, but kept a hand on Harry's chest. Hermione had no intention of removing her hand, but at the same time she was quite sure that she wouldn't have been able to if she had wanted. However as they watched, a green, emerald glow started to spread outward from Harry's chest. The area where Hermione's hand was still resting. The green pulse seemed to eat its way through the blue, pulsating out with the cadence of a heartbeat. Hermione, having her hand resting on his chest, could tell that it wasn't only his heartbeat that it was going along the timing with, but it was hers as well. They were synced, through whatever was happening.

The two auras seemed to fight against one another, pulsing back and forth again and again. Until finally the emerald aura had wiped out the blue entirely and with a small spark, the blue collapsed completely. The emerald faded a few seconds later, but it was clear that the green aura had only faded from their view, not collapsed the same way that the blue had.

"Hermione, what was that?" Harry asked carefully.

Hermione looked pensive for a moment. "Harry, what did Dumbledore always say about the wards around your Aunts house?" She asked, color draining away from her face.

"That they worked because of old blood magic, and that as long as that…oh merlin, that isn't good…." Harry's eyes widened in shock of what had clearly just happened.

"Exactly." Hermione said, not breaking eye contact with him.

"Can someone tell me what just happened? I just wanted to go to a nice dinner today…." Daniel said, sounding resigned to having another strange day.

"The wards around Harry's aunts house only work as long as he considered where his mothers sister lived, home. Clearly by Harry saying…" she blushed "…that, the wards aren't holding on any longer. His birthday isn't until Thursday, but I'm sure that the Order had a plan to move you secretly from one Fidelus location to another once the wards failed." She was getting continually paler as her mind raced to a thousand different possibilities of what this was going to mean.

Before Harry or anyone else could respond, they all became distinctly aware of no less than half a dozen loud cracks echoing around the outside of the house. Their location wasn't a secret any longer.


	3. Chapter 3: Rubatosis

Chapter 3: Rubatosis:

_The unsettling awareness of one's own heartbeat._

* * *

**Sunday, July 28th 1997**

The cracks around the house were clearly that of Apparition, there weren't enough cars surrounding the house to backfire like that. He was uncomfortably aware of his own heartbeat as his mind started to play out different scenarios in his head. "Hermione, we have to leave. Right. Now." Harry said, whirling around finally taking a look at the layout of the house.

 _Stupid! This is what you get for letting your guard down!_ He thought to himself in his panic of trying to observe everything around him at once.

"We can't. They have anti apparition wards up. We aren't going to be able to leave unless it is on foot." She whispered back hastily.

"Running on foot doesn't sound like it would work well..." Jane said, her face white.

"No, they would follow us." Harry said, flinging small charms around the room hoping to stop the windows from breaking any second now. The Death Eaters outside seemed like they were hesitating. There was no outwards signs that Harry was in the house, only that he was in this area. Harry wasn't sure why they were waiting for so long, but he didn't care.

"Let's use the stairwell, if we can funnel them into that hallway, then we would have an easier time." Hermione said, nudging her parents toward the staircase. They didn't need any further prodding to take the stairs two at a time.

Harry realized at the top of the stairs that he had little to no plan now. This was the part of the life or death situation where either Hermione would come in and save the day with a plan, or he would do something stupid and get lucky.

For the first time in reasonable history, Harry did not want either of those outcomes. So he looked around grasping at straws hoping to get some inspiration before something happened. The sound of shattering windows interrupted his thoughts as he smelled the distinct smell of charred wood while the doors where blown inside. Harry could feel Dan tense next to him as the sound of a half dozen footsteps clattered around the first floor of his home. Harry couldn't empathize, he hadn't ever really had a home of his own, but he could imagine that it must have felt like a violation just to have them storm his home. Never mind what the Death Eaters would do to them if they found them.

"I may not have a wand, but I do at least have this." Dan said from behind them, brandishing a pistol. "I did serve some time in the military, so at least I know how to use it." He said grim faced and tight jawed.

Sounds of breaking glass and splintering wood echoed from downstairs. They must have decided that it wasn't worth waiting or trying to do this quietly anymore. "We don't have a lot of options today Hermione, we can't afford to pull punches…" Harry whispered to Hermione. She caught his eye and nodded.

Hermione snapped her wrist again and ten small spheres appeared over the tip of her wand. There were six extra people in the house with them. "Wait until they come. Then fire." Hermione whispered in the smallest voice he had ever heard a human use.

He cut a sharp nod in response. He wasn't sure yet what he was going to fire down the stairs, but he knew that he wasn't going to use stunners or anything like that. This was not a situation where they could afford to be attacked over and over again by the same set of Eaters. They needed to go down, and not get back up. He hated the way he was thinking, but even out of the corner of his eye he could see Hermione's profile standing out against the whitewash of the stairwell behind her. He knew that he didn't have a choice, she would not fall like she had that night in the Ministry. Never again.

The first Death Eater came around the corner, he didn't appear to be one that they recognized off the bat, but it was hard to tell from his gait who he was. While Harry was fairly familiar with an alarming number of Death Eaters at this point, Voldemort was undoubtably doing more recruiting all the time. He dared a glance up the stairs while his compatriots made violent work of the rest of the rooms below. The sound of general mayhem floating up toward the family.

The morning light was starting to shift through the upper windows of the house which unfortunately didn't leave Harry and Hermione much room to hide in. As the Death Eater glance upwards and registered that they were there, Harry's wand made the barest of horizontal flicks. "Diffindo" Harry whispered. He didn't quite trust himself to do a non-verbal spell perfectly yet, and this wasn't the time to test his chances. The tip of his wand held the blue afterglow for a second, but whatever the Death Eater was about to call out, fell silent on his lips as his head tumbled backwards off his shoulders.

Harry winced at the spray of blood and the collective gasps that had come from all three Grangers. What he had just done was cold, calculated and precise. There had been no room for error and no room for redemption on the part of the unfortunate thug. They had made their choice when they had broken into this house and Harry was out of compassion for anyone with the Dark Mark at the moment. Actions and choices had consequences, unfortunately, for the headless man down below, he had made some poor choices.

The flash of magic combined with the deadened thud of the body hitting the floor drew the attention of the other members of the house. Slamming footsteps echoed around as Harry strained his ears attempting to hear from which different parts of the house they were running from. Their directions ceased to matter a second later however when the remaining five were standing at the base of the stairs looking up at them.

"How cute, hiding with his pet mudblood!" The familiar drawl labeled the leading Death Eater as the head of the Malfoy family immediately. This time Hermione was the one to strike out, an orange light burst down the stairs and drilled a perfect hand sized hole in the wall where his face had been a moment before. He smiled, smug in the fact that his face still intact. His eyes though, were anything but smug. Even from this distance, Harry could see the hate burning in the mans eyes. "You stupid mudblood bitch! You think your pathetic schoolyard tactics will work? You will regret accosting a member of the Dark Lords chosen!" He finished snapping a curse up the stairs toward the crouching teens.

Thinking quickly, Harry threw up a hasty shield charm while pushing Hermione behind him. The fact that the Death Eaters would have to climb the steps one at a time seemed to be working as Hermione had expected. They hesitated, knowing that one at a time was more or less asking to be cut down the same as the first had.

In the moment, the split second, of hesitation was all he needed. He knew how stupid what he was about to do was. He knew that if it worked he would still have to hear about it from Hermione. He even knew that there was very little chance that this was going to work. With a roar Harry threw himself down the stairs pointing his wand in front of him and focusing everything he had on a blasting curse.

Thankfully it worked and the entire group of Death Eaters and himself blasted through the wall behind them and into the yard. The force of Harry's spell had fractured the wall for sure, but the majority of the damage came from the bodies of the Death Eaters flying through it. The momentum of coming down the stairs sadly resulted in Harry being outside the house as well, but he knew that was going to happen. As he rolled a halt, now outside of the house. He heard Hermione behind him.

"Get in touch with the Order how I told you!"

He heard the sound of retreating footsteps as her parents went back deeper into the house. Hermione was now at his shoulder ready to face the group of Death Eaters that had tried to take her home.

Their wands cackled with shifting light as their magic responded to the adrenaline in their system. Their bodies were at peak awareness and their magic was responding in kind. In the amount of time it took for Hermione to join him and Harry to get to his feet, the Death Eaters were now stirring and getting on their feet.

A yellow whip came slashing at them and Harry nudged Hermione to the side and threw another blasting curse at the ground kicking up a giant tidal wave of dirt and grass.

After awkwardly landing on their side, Harry quickly rolled up and threw another shield from his kneeling position. Curses slammed into it, and yet even before he could feel the tug, Hermione threw another shield on top of his.

"Don't kill Potter! I don't care what you do with the bitch. Potter belongs to the Dark Lord!" One of the Death Eaters yelled as they slowed their firing. For a second they seemed undecided on how to proceed.

Hermione this time took the advantage. "Cover me!" She grunted as she dropped her shield and spun to her left, dropping to her knee as she did so. With a complex twist of her wand hand, a blasting hex and a piercing hex danced from the tip of her wand. The piercing hex caught one of the shorter Death Eaters off to the side between the eyes. His head snapped back in an almost comical motion and his body tilted backwards and started leaking blood into a giant puddle on the ground. The blasting hex took the arm off another from the shoulder down. The spray of blood, ligament, muscle and skin blew away from his body with a wet ripping sounds. His screams matched.

Harry silenced the mans screams with a follow up blasting hex. His shield dropped and despite an oncoming hail of curses from the less surprised Death Eaters and his blasting curse sailed across the lawn to connect with the face of the Death Eater already starting to cradle his stump of an arm.

Harry almost had to take a moment to marvel at what had just happened. Half the combatants had been killed by either Harry or Hermione. It had almost been too easy. They had disabled or killed most of the attackers. Them, two seventeen year old school kids, had just taken down a group of terrorists. Harry knew that the training him and Hermione had practiced in fifth year had been important and helpful, he never realized how some of that would stick in his head. He was good at the subject, but this seemed to be beyond that. Hermione and him were moving as if this was normal for them. Spell choices seemed to bloom in his mind as he needed them. Hermione was clearly functioning the same. It was a different way of dueling than Harry had ever experienced, it was almost like it was a dance. He didn't have time to interrupt the moment with his thoughts though.

The three remaining Eaters were quite angry with the current state of affairs and showed their displeasure by rocketing different colored beams of light across the lawn. Harry and Hermione did everything they could to block or dodge, but they had a man disadvantage and things were becoming difficult to keep moving and running away from exploding bits of earth. While it felt like it had been a life time that they had been fighting, Harry knew that less than two minutes had passed since he blew out the wall.

A wave of purple lines hurtled at them, making Hermione yelp a bit before she threw her wand in a wide arc and created a wall of dirt that took the impact of the spells. It was a spell that used up a lot of power, but it was worth it since those curses certainly wouldn't have been blocked by their shields, if the sounds of the explosions and the rocking of the ground was any indication.

"We don't have time for this, go in there and kill her parents. See if the mudblood come out nicely then." A cold voice called out from the pack of Death Eaters.

Harry felt the blood drain from his body. He turned to look at Hermione to see his reaction mirrored on her face but tinged with more horror than he could describe.

"Go, I can handle the two out here. I'll make sure they can't follow. Just get them out of here. Meet at Snuffles house." Harry snapped out, giving Hermione a start, but she seemed to flow back to reality after that brief moment.

Knowing there was no time to argue, she bolted. The second she started to run, Harry threw himself over the dirt wall and started firing hexes as fast as he could mutter them. Some of them came out before he even finished the words and for a second he felt like he was casting even faster than he could come up with new spells to use.

Clearly the pair they had left out in the yard was the least experienced of the group. Harry wasn't sure who the three were that they had already killed, but it was clear in their stance and their mannerisms, these were not people used to making a wide range of decisions. They had been sent here to fight and destroy, not think through an intense situation involving people that could fight back. Harry used that to his advantage.

There was a veritable whirlwind of energy and magic swirling around Harry and from his wand. Harry felt himself fall into a deep calm. The knowledge that Hermione's life and her parents lives, were at risk, seemed to fuel something inside of him that he didn't know how to use. It was overwhelming and because of that he didn't have any problem surrendering to the feeling. Like the ocean, there was no fighting it and he knew it immediately. And so that was how he found himself sinking into a fighting style that didn't even seem to be his own.

The Eaters, not knowing what to do with such a situation, started firing haphazardly and getting slower with their shields. They had banked on the level of terror that their costumes could create. Finding opponents that wanted to fight back against the Dark Lord and his cohorts was rare. Having to play on the defensive was not something they were taught with much effort. So Harry's wild abandon and drive to fight back against them put them at such unease that they hastily started making more and more mistakes.

_cut_

_blast_

_sheild!_

Harry repeated the curses in his head as fast as he could. He knew that somewhere along the way he had stopped speaking them. Seconds dragged on and Harry ducked and jumped away from the blasting lights flying at him. Faster and faster Harry repeated the same curses, not having anything else to fight with and not being trained in combat like this, it was everything he could to keep his bearings. Faster and faster the words flew through his mind, blurring from thought to wand work seamlessly. Soon the spells stopped coming in his head. Instead images appeared, feelings almost, of what he needed at that moment. To his surprise, things did change. His wand moved faster, his step had an extra burst to it.

Harry stopped trying to analyze or think about the spellwork he was doing. He just let the ideas and images flow through him and whatever happened happened. He had no experience in this kind of fighting, there was no point in over thinking it since he didn't even know where to start. The luck that he had relied on for so long, was running dry.

_move!_

_shield!_

The commands formed in his brain rapidly and he let himself flow from moment to moment, something seeming to come to life inside of him. There was passion in battle. That passion and drive started a fire inside of him. Hermione was in trouble, facing who knows what inside the house. She was at risk of losing her life, and her family. She was at risk of becoming an orphan like him...And he could not let that happen. Like a spark to tinder, the thoughts burned away inside of him. His doubts, his fears, his concerns, gone in a flash. There was only the drive to win.

Faster and faster again the curses came. Some even flying from his wand and doing something completely surprising. A blasting curse turned into a fireball blowing up the yard around him. A cutting curse turned into a whip of glistening blue fire. In his head, silence. Pure calm and determination. The fight or flight response inside his mind, was no longer a choice. He had decided to fight and the stakes were simple and desperate.

Harry rolled and dodged a few more times before finally a shield fizzled out of existence at the wrong moment and the smaller of the two Death Eaters was cut down across the knees. Bone and flesh flew away from the now gaping wounds that were his femurs. What had started as a cutting curse, something that would form a smooth slice, the beam had ripped across the lawn and slashed with the impact of a broadsword. So with the slash came an explosion of viscera that almost shocked Harry out of his concentration. Screams again rent the air as the Death Eater fell no longer able to support his own weight. His upper body fell downward in place and his exposed femur bones drove into the dirt before he fell backwards screaming in pain. Before his screams could crescendo, a blasting curse silenced him permanently. Distracted by the shocking death of his teammate and the suddenly silenced screams of the man to his left, the second Death Eater didn't see the bludgeoning curse that Harry hurled at his head.

The curse smacked the side of his head and he went down and didn't move again, the bludgeoning curse leaving the mans head looking like a caved in watermelon. He had now killed four of six people that had invaded the house just barely five minutes past. Unable to be bothered by this, nestled in the calm of battle as he was, Harry started moving again.

No more than two minutes had passed since Hermione had bolted away from. Despite that, Harry knew that two minutes was an incredibly long time. Not waiting to investigate the last body, Harry threw himself into the house and up the stairs. He could hear spellfire and the sound of walls creaking and wood breaking.

Not caring about being heard, Harry took the stairs two at a time, his eyes and ears snapping back and forth down the hallway searching for the source of the noises he was hearing. It wasn't difficult and he came to the room at the end of the hall.

The first thing that Harry noticed was that he had made a big mistake with assuming that the entire group sent to the Granger house was of new blood to the Death Eaters. The Death Eater in the room had shed his mask and cloak at the door allowing Harry to identify him instantly. Fenrir Greyback. The most feared and vicious Werewolf in all of Europe.

On the other side of the room stood Hermione shoulder to shoulder with her father. Dan had the handgun out and to his credit was holding it incredibly steady for a man facing down a werewolf. Hermione's face was pale, but her jaw had a determined set that Harry had always admired in her when she concentrated on something to the exclusion of everything else.

Her wand tip moved from spot to spot in the air, shifting the focus of the shield ever so slightly so that the different spells flying at her from across the room hit the center mass of the shield and didn't have too much opportunity to crack through it. While the force of Fenrir's curses was admirable, it was apparent that the werewolf had spent most of his time relying on his physical defenses and attributes to work for him in a fight. While he was competent magically, it would appear that Hermione was more than a match for him spell for spell. If and when Greyback decided that he had enough of her games, then he would likely pounce the distance across the room and take the family by force. Judging by the way that Dan Grangers's handgun and eyes matched the werewolves movements, he was preparing for the same inevitability.

Fenrir knew that Hermione's spell work was good but he was likely using his natural resistances to keep him safe from just about anything short of a killing curse, and aside from what Harry felt about taking the lives of Death Eaters, there was something inside of him that blocked him from being able to do that curse.

Harry's sudden entrance into the room unfortunately disrupted the altercation between the two giving a small distraction to Hermione's shield. A flick in the wrong direction and a bludgioning hex slammed into the fringe of her shield instead of the center and it shattered completely, Hermione spinning slightly from the force of the impact. That was the only opening that Greyback needed, with a sneer and a flick of the eyes at Harry, he sent an emerald green curse sailing at Hermione.

Time seemed to slow down for a moment when Harry saw the sickly green light flare out of the wand tip. Harry had seen the curse now more times in his life than most other people from his generation. The killing curse had a distinct look and feel to it as it was cast. Harry recognized the charged smell of burnt ozone as it came to full existence. The energy required to cast that particular spell was quite extensive and the magical output of it in its raw form was impressive. In that fraction of a second though, Harry saw all the different times he had seen that curse flash in front of him. Having seen it cast at friends and loved ones was much worse than having it cast at yourself.

Harry knew what the after effects of the curse would look like. He knew the look in the victims eyes as their soul was torn from their body by the force of the hate fueled curse. He knew how they would fall like a marionette with its strings cut. Most of all though, he knew the feeling of his heart breaking as he watched that person fall. Dumbledore, Sirius, Cedric, and his parents. Their images flashed in front of him in quick succession, ending with Hermione's face.

Harry acted without thinking, as he was usually one to do. Hurling himself into the center of the room as hard as he could, he tried to place himself in front of the curse. There was only one thing he could think of doing, and it would either work or he would take the curse for her. Watching her take the curse would destroy him in ways that Voldemort wouldn't even be able to replicate by killing Harry. Harry knew there were things he could live with and things that he couldn't live with. As he flew through the air, he reached out in front of himself and conjured a small stone tablet. Conjuring something from nothing wasn't an easy task, and under normal circumstances the tablet would be useless for just about everything, but in this case, it did its job.

Upon the spell impacting the tablet, it exploded forcefully throwing Harry backwards and into Dan Granger toppling them and Jane backwards leaving Hermione standing on her own. Greyback's look of surprise and consternation was the only opening Hermione needed. Unlike Harry, she was much more versed in spell variety and didn't have to resort to brute force like a cutting spell to attack the werewolf. Another almost imperceivable flick of her wand and a muttered curse and roughly two dozen silver darts exploded from her wand. About as long as Harry's hand the darts crossed the room fast enough that it was impossible to follow them with the eye. Fenrir's form was hurled across the room into the far wall and pinned there by the sheer force. The death eater didn't move as the darts held him in place, a number of them directly through his chest cavity, but also a number straight through his forehead. Their silver composition ensuring that he would not be rising again.

Dan and Jane both looked at their daughter with a new light in their eyes. As she stood there, her hair whipping around her from the force of her magic eyes narrowed determinedly, she looked like a valkyrie warrior her face was pure focus. No doubt, no fear. In that moment you would have believed that she was a warrior hardened by battle. Hermione had acted with all the finality and precision that she did everything with. Her wand arm lowered slowly as they all watched a small puddle of blood begin to form around the werewolves feet. As the muscles of the Werewolves hand loosened in death, a small orb fell to his feet.

As they watched, the orb started to glow a sick red and somehow Harry knew that they had been fooled. They had been watching the wrong hand. Hermione's eyes went wide and her arm started to move upward, but Harry was faster.

Harry didn't wait, rolling to the side so he wasn't on top of Dan anymore, Harry flicked his wand at Hermione. "Accio Hermione!" he said clearly. With surprising speed, Hermione was yanked across the room into Harry's arms, cushioning her fall. In any other moment it would have been romantic or at least heroic. Like something out of the stories that were written about him to lull small children to sleep. Today though it was out of necessity.

"Protego Maxima!" Harry practically yelled as he pointed his wand straight down at the feet of the family. With those words, he poured every ounce of strength and will. With his wand pointed straight down he thought only one thing to himself _"Let me protect her family."_ The calm returned to his mind and he felt his magic pour out of him like a tea kettle draining into a cup. The flow of magic burst into life from his wand tip. He might have said the words for the shield spell, but Harry knew right away that it hadn't mattered. The magic that he was using was beyond words. It was like his patronus. Powered by something inside of him that had nothing to do with incantations. In the calm, Harry knew that what he was doing was right and that he just had to have the strength to do it.

Hermione jolted in surprise, a blue half dome didn't appear at their feet as would have been normal for the shield spell. Instead, a giant translucent blue sphere appeared all around them, just as the sphere had formed. The world was lit to a piercing bright white. The explosion that ripped away from the orb on the floor was impressive to say the least.

Sound seemed to be able to make it through but it was muffled. As if they were listening to it through a large amount of cotton shoved into their ears. The muffling was good because the raging inferno that ripped through the room for a moment was the most intensely beautiful display Harry had ever seen. Light washed this way and that across the dome surrounding them. The fire and fury that whipped around them seemed to cascade into splashes of color and magic that slid like oil across the glass walls around them. The ground rumbled and Harry realized that the house was about to fall in on itself after the force of the explosion.

Bits of plaster fell and beams of wood started to fall from the broken rafters. Everything went dark as more and more of the building caved around them, putting pressure on Harry's shield and buffeting them around. With every smash against the walls of the shield, Harry could feel himself grow weary. The energy drain that was taking place as he stood there, wand resolute, was immense. The size of the bubble itself and the forces that it was holding back were more than should have been possible on a normal day. Desperation had driven him to choose this plan in the first place, and once he had set it in motion, there wasn't much he could do to change his mind then. He just had to force his magic to do what he needed it to do.

The crashing stopped and the sounds grew fainter. Quiet even. As Harry held on for everything that he could, forcing more and more magic into the spell while the walls continued to press down upon them he felt Hermione's hand grasp his empty one. Her reassurance that she was there with him gave him a new wave of energy. A jolt seemed to pass through her and into him and thus into the shield itself. A pearly luminescence spread across the surface of the bubble from his wand point and covered it completely within seconds. Just like that, the energy drain seemed to be much less, much more bearable and survivable. Harry felt like he could hold that for as long as he needed to.

"Thank you." his voice cracked.

He was about to say more when all of a sudden shafts of light cut into their view as bits of the wall were thrown away. The magic snagging on to the parts of the house was quite forceful in its yanking. The walls were pulled away and cast aside as a blurry set of members of the Order of the Phoenix scrambled their way over the debris to the fallen family.

"Remus!" Hermione yelled, pulling her hand away from Harry's, breaking their connection. With the broken connection the luminescence from earlier vanished and the weight of the remaining debris came back down upon Harry. The drain on his magic increased a thousand fold and he knew he couldn't hold the spell in place any longer.

With a small yelp, Harry's vision faded out and he knew no more.

**Monday, July 29th 1997**

Harry's vision cleared as he slowly came back to consciousness. He blinked a few times, clearing the fog from his vision only to realize that he didn't have his glasses on. Harry more or less expected to see the walls of the hospital wing around him as usual, but that didn't appear to be where Harry found himself.

"Wha…" harry started to say only to be interrupted by Hermione.

"Oh Harry, I'm so glad you're awake." his bushy-haired friend said with a sniff and turn upwards of her nose as she left the room.

She left Harry quite confused as the unfamiliar door swung shut behind her. "Wha…" Harry started again this time not bothering to finish the question on his own. His head was still fuzzy and he still didn't have his glasses on. Reaching out to the side where he approximated a side table to be he felt around until he did indeed find his glasses. Putting them on and the room came into focus.

Brown walls, not dark brown, more of a 'this used to be white but so much time has passed it is now brown' kind of brown. The faded patterns of the wallpaper that had once been in the background appear to be quite out of date and it was also peeling in places. The water stains near the ceiling and the cracked plaster of the ceiling itself told Harry that he was currently somewhere quite old.

"She's just worried about you Harry." Remus said from the opposite side of the room that Harry was observing. His tone was quiet, but there was a touch of amusement as well. "You've been unconscious for about 28 hours now. Not your longest bout of being injured for sure, but still more than Ms. Granger would have liked I would imagine." He said, a smile pulling on the corners of his mouth.

"What happened? I remember my shield failing, though I'm not sure why." Harry said, trying to place the order of events in his head.

"Well by the time we got there, the house was already crumbling in on itself." Remus said, fidgeting in his chair.

"Wait, are the Grangers ok? Did they get hurt in the collapse? What about the remaining Death Eaters?" Harry asked, starting to remember more of the events leading up to his unconsciousness in more detail. Panic starting to rise in the back of his throat. Had he caused more danger to come to the elder Grangers by taking the house down around them?

"Peace Harry, slow down. Everyone is fine. Well, minus most of the Death Eaters." Remus said wryly. "Malfoy Sr. appears to be the only one that managed to get away from the attack. He was injured fairly badly, but he fared better than some of the others. The only reason he managed to make it through the collapse of the house itself was because he used Marcus Flint as a human shield. Or that's the best we can tell from how badly Flint's body was damaged." His tone took on a more serious note. "I saw what was done to Grayback, thank you. I hesitate to even call him a man anymore after how far he had let himself slip into his inner monster."

"It wasn't me, Hermione did that. I distracted him…and then he threw the killing curse at Hermione, it uh, missed, and she nailed him to the back wall with the silver darts." Harry said, not really sure how to explain his maneuver with the conjured tablet.

"Yes, quite literally nailed. Normal magic wouldn't have effected him too much anyways. Not this close to the full moon. While we don't fully transform until the full moon, if you are already that given over to the darker side of your nature, the closer the moon gets the easier it is to channel some of the 'benefits' that lycanthropy brings." Remus intoned, his professor side coming out a bit as he explained. "Hermione's spell choice was quite appropriate for the situation."

Harry nodded, meeting the older man's eyes. He could see that there was painful memories swimming around behind Remus's veneer of calm gratitude for the death of the man who had, in his mind, taken his life away. It couldn't be argued that Remus had had a tough life after being bitten as a child, but as far as Harry figured, he had still had friends, he had still be able to go to school, the only issue was the minor problem of not being able to find work after school, well and the monthly transformations. The wizarding world was a tough place to be 'different', as Harry was well accustomed to. The difference was that Harry was a 'different' celebrity, not a 'different' 'half-breed' as Umbridge had said. The difference grated on Harry. He would have given just about anything to be able to fall into obscurity like a werewolf could. He knew that it was a waste of time to wish for things like that, but the thoughts floated through Harry's mind unbidden anyways.

"I killed them…I used a cutting spell to take his head off before he even had a chance to defend himself. My reductors blew some of their limbs off…." Harry said, finding himself speaking as he slowly registered the things he had done.

"Now Harry, what you did was necessary. This is war now, and it isn't pretty." Remus said, though it fell on deaf ears.

"I carved through them like a monster." Harry whispered then promptly leaned over the side of his bed and emptied the contents of his stomach onto the already stained wood of the floor. The calm that he had felt earlier replaced with shame and guilt that threatened to overwhelm him. Things had happened during that fight that he didn't understand, but the results had been effective and brutal. The fact that it was something that Harry had just let flow through him somehow made it worse. If that was what he could do without thinking about it or even hesitating for a moment, was he any better than the Death Eaters?

Inside him a war seemed to be tearing through him. On one hand, he had known in that second that it was kill or be killed, but now, in the relative safety of the bed, the idea seemed insane to him. There was always other options. Dumbledore had never resorted to those kinds of things. Even when he had been faced with an entire throng of Death Eaters, he didn't raise his wand to cut them down like animals, he spoke to them and tried to reason with them. Draco had listened, it had started to work. Harry would never know if the man he had sliced through like a bit of parchment would have listened. Would he have been as receptive as Draco?

Harry tried to keep reminding himself that they would have killed everyone in the house. They would have probably tortured the Grangers for fun before finally ending their lives. Who knows what kind of unspeakable horrors they would have submitted Hermione to before taking her life as well. After all those things were done, then, maybe then, they would have taken him to Voldemort to be executed finally. They would have broken Harry beyond repair by hurting everyone around him in the most horrendous ways possible. Harry knew that, and yet the disgust at ending their lives so viciously wouldn't leave his minds eye.

"You know what they would have done to them if you had let them live Harry. They were there to get to you, they were there to strike fear into your heart and into the rest of the Wizarding World as fast and complete as they could in one swoop. Do you really think that Lucious would have stopped at murdering Hermione and her parents?" Remus said softly, reaching out to pat small circles on Harry's back as he leaned over the side of his bed still.

"Dumbledore managed to hide so much from you in an attempt to keep you innocent, but the horrors of the first war were unlike anything you could have ever imagined. The stupidity that Draco spouted while walking around the castle was only the barest of a hint of what came to be normal during Voldemort's rise to power. Dumbledore didn't want you to know these things because he wanted to protect you for as long as he could. But the school yard fights that you have found yourself in year after year, have been tame in comparison to what happened in the years before you were born." Remus said softly.

"School yard fights?" Harry snapped. "Cedric was murdered in front of me during the Triwizard Tournament!" Harry said vehemently.

"Yes, and while that was tragic in its own right, it was a mercy that he was simply murdered. Voldemort and his followers are terrorists in the purest sense of the word. The reason people fear to even speak his name isn't because he is able to cast the killing curse well." Remus said severely. Forcing his point home. "He is so feared because of what he could do with the simplest of spells to torment, break and terrorize his opponents. His followers didn't have his…subtly, but they had all of his viciousness."

Remus took a breath, gathering himself for what he was about to say. The look of pain that crossed his face was one that Harry hadn't seen in some time. "I was a known friend of your parents and a member of the Order since nearly the inception of the order itself. The woman I was dating at the time, a woman I very well thought I would marry, wasn't a member at the time. I hadn't brought her into the know of the Order yet because we were still figuring out how to fight effectively. I also didn't want her in danger more than she needed to be. She was smart, much like Hermione, but she was…delicate. She always wanted to see the best in people and had a tough time bringing herself to fight with anyone about anything." Remus paused, his eyes fluttering closed for a second, memories searing back and forth across his face.

"They found her while I was transformed during the full moon. They had come while I was locked away intentionally. While I raged in my cell down in the basement, they picked her apart for hours Harry. She fought back, but against five of them, she didn't stand a chance. As they spent most of the night raping her, they got creative. They sliced through a small part of each of her limbs as they went. By the time she bled to death, her arms had been sliced up to the elbows and she had nothing more than her thighs left. Hours, Harry, she spent hours with those animals literally pulling her apart as they defiled her again and again. All because I was a member of the Order." Remus said a few tears falling down his face as he nearly growled the last bit out to Harry.

For Harry, he couldn't have been more revolted by what he had just heard. All of a sudden the things he had faced didn't seem so scary anymore. They didn't seem to have the impact of the sheer terror that the Death Eaters had inspired in the older generation. "I can't imagine…" Harry whispered. Feeling properly ashamed for his outburst.

"No, and no one should have to Harry. That is what they inspired in our society. The crimes they committed, the atrocities that they raged on our world were literally so unspeakable, that people couldn't even speak the monsters name who had started it. It wasn't because killed without thought, it was because of how much thought he put into it. How he removed those who faced him. Our world was more or less ready to buckle under his reign, the level of fear that he had spread across our people was complete and the darkness had almost closed in completely when he finally came for you. This is why people celebrate your mere existence Harry. You delivered our world, through no fault of your own, from the most terrifying destruction that they had ever faced." Remus said, his voice finally cracking near the end. "That is what Dumbledore tried to protect you against Harry."

Remus sighed and leaned back into his chair. "You acted instinctually and with courage that most others wouldn't have been able to muster. Never forget the kind of horrors that you spared the Granger family because of it. Never second guess yourself. The war has come again, and I guarantee, Voldemort will want to make up for lost time."

"Now, let's discuss just how you managed to take a household cutting spell and turn it into a precision weapon." Remus said, steeping his fingers with a quizzical stare that made Harry squirm all over again.


	4. Chapter 4: Exulansis

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for all your kind words so far, I am having a lot of fun sharing this story with you all.
> 
> As I said in the first chapter, this work is finished and I will make sure that I do not leave it abandoned. This past few days has been nice having time to do final edits, so I've been putting things out pretty fast, I'm not 100% sure I can keep that pace up for the final edits and stuff with my wife before I post it. But rest assured that at most, it will only be 1 week between chapter postings. There are 37 chapters to this story, and unless I add sections to it (and I'm tempted to do so) that is the final count for the story. Things are going to diverge more from cannon from this point on, and the recognizable scenes from Deathly Hallows will pretty much vanish after the next few chapters. I hope you all continue to enjoy reading!
> 
> The characters are of course not mine, and I make no money from this piece of work.

**Chapter 4: Exulansis:**

_The tendency to give up trying to talk about an experience because people are unable to relate to it._

**Monday, July 29th 1997**

* * *

Harry let his head flop against the pillow with a 'humph' sound. Closing his eyes and slightly wishing that he was still unconscious. "Remus, can we do that conversation like maybe, any other time than now?" Harry said, probably rougher than he intended to, but he was still feeling ill from the past twenty minutes of conversation.

"Perhaps you are right," Remus sighed and let a smile fade onto his face. "James never liked to discuss the results of the match till he had time to think about it himself. He said that he liked to go over things on his own before he got too much input from everyone else. It was those small things that I think eventually won over your mother."

Harry felt the corner of his mouth turn up. Twice in this conversation, Remus had mentioned his parents. Remus had spent some time talking about his parents to him, but not on a frequency that Harry could remember.

"I won't dig into the issue too much right this minute if you insist, but Hermione mentioned that you used a cutting spell to some serious effect. What were you imagining your head would happen?" he asked without any judgement in his voice.

Harry was initially hesitant to answer, but finally spoke. "I imagined the top of his head coming off exactly the way it did after I cast." Harry said, blinking his eyes a few times to burn into his mind what he had just said.

"I thought as much," Remus said as he nodded his head. "Sometimes, in war, we must use anything to our advantage. This sounds like something we can discuss later. Thank you for telling me."

"Uh, Remus. I did have one question." Harry said before the older man could walk away.

"Of course Harry."

"When my Dad would make Mum angry, how would he try to make it up to her?" He said, stumbling through the words. Having had to use his parents titles in the same sentence so infrequently, it felt odd in his mouth.

"Why do you ask?" Remus said with a bit of a sparkle in his eye. "Is there a lady that you have your eye on?"

Harry blushed to the top of his hair and made a few sounds that could have been interpreted as "yes" "no" and "uhhhmmmerrr".

"I just...well, I don't know why I made Hermione mad. I guess it is probably because I almost go her killed again and this time almost her parents. I can understand why she would be mad at me, maybe forever, I don't know...but even if she hates me, is there a way I could at least try to say I'm sorry?" Harry realized he was babbling so he looked down at his hands instead of the eyes of his parents friend, his friend.

"I am sure that isn't why Hermione is angry. She has followed you to the depths of hell and back. I feel like if she was mad about the danger you both found yourself in all the time, she would have left by now. I seem to remember a certain third year that called a certain werewolf down on herself to save you. I wouldn't call that fleeing from danger."

Harry mulled that around and thought about that night again, not for the first time in recent memory. Their flight on Buckbeak and rescuing Sirius was one of the highlights of his time at Hogwarts. Harry still felt the guilt roll around inside of him.

"She almost died in the department of mysteries because I was wrong." Harry's breath caught for a second, "Sirius _did_ die because I was wrong. How much longer until she does die and I have to live with that?" Harry whispered. "I can hardly look myself in the mirror now as it is. If something was to happen to her, I don't think I would be able to keep going."

Remus was silent for a minute and then heaved a sigh. "Sirius being gone has cut a hole inside of me bigger than I can explain. I knew him for longer, but we both got him back at the same time. You and I both were there when we realized he was innocent. We both got to know Sirius again in those few years before he left us." Remus said quietly, sitting back down on the edge of the chair seat with his elbows on his knees.

"I'm sor..."

"No, that was not my point." Remus interrupted him, his head shooting up to face Harry again. "I am telling you this, because we both got to have Sirius in our lives for that short time. You found a godfather, and I found my friend again. Him being gone again hurts more than I can say, but I've never been angry at you about it. Not ever. It wasn't your fault. In fact, when I think about Sirius, the only thing I can really think of is how grateful I am to you."

"I don't understand."

"You gave us both two years that we wouldn't have had. You traveled through god damn time to save him. We both had two years of being around him, seeing him smile, and hearing him laugh. I got to see him as a free man again, innocent and not a mass murder. At least when I laid him to rest, it was as my best friend, and not as a traitor."

"He would still be here." Harry tried to dig his heels in again.

"Maybe, but that doesn't matter. In war, we have to look at the good thing we gain from our sacrifice and our bravery. If we spend all our time looking at the times we have failed, then the evil wins anyways. You didn't fail Sirius. Quite the opposite." Remus said smiling.

"You gathered your friends, mobilized an entire set up inside the castle, escaped, dropped off a hag in the forest, and _flew_ to London to save Sirius. When we found out and started preparing to head to London and the Order was gathering, Sirius was distraught about you being in danger, but he was also overwhelmed with how much you loved him and what you were willing to do for him. He almost couldn't accept it. Having spent thirteen years as the world seeing him as a murderer, but in a moment, you being willing to risk your life for him?"

Harry realized his eyes were a bit wet, and so he didn't say anything.

"He was so damn proud of you cub."

Harry did start crying then. Remus had some tears in his eyes as well. "I really miss him Remus. I really do." He managed to choke out between his stifled tears.

"Me too. I may not be your Godfather, but I will always be here beside you. And for the record, I am also insanely proud of you, and I know for a fact, your parents would be too."

The two men stayed in silence for quite some time, silent, but together in their grief.

* * *

It was sometime later that a shadow loomed in the doorway. Harry looked around at seeing the disturbance in the light as did Remus.

"Hello Hermione," Remus said, standing. "I feel like I'm probably not needed for this conversation." He turned to Harry. "Be honest. Be kind. And believe what your friends," he placed a hand on his shoulder, "and family, tell you." He smiled one more time and swept from the room.

She stalked over to the chair that Remus had been sitting in and threw herself down into it. "I can't even explain how angry I am with you right now." She said, reiterating what he already was very aware of.

"Listen, I'm sorry Hermione. I didn't mean to bring that kind of danger down onto your family. I should have never come over to your parents house in the first place. I should have stayed put like Dumbledore always wanted me to." Harry blurted out before she said anything more.

"Don't be stupid Harry. I was the one who dragged you to my parents house and didn't give you much of a choice about it." Hermione said dismissively. "We can handle the repercussions of how yesterday's...catastrophe went another time. That isn't what I'm upset about what you did when you...came upstairs." She spit the last bit of the sentence out as if it was hot in her mouth.

Harry wasn't following as closely as she thought he was supposed to be, which was apparent by the look on her face. She scowled a bit deeper. "Don't get me wrong Harry, I appreciate you flying up there and coming to my rescue, but do you realize that you almost died!?" She was slipping in and out of control at this point. It seemed that every word that she added caused her to slip a little bit more. "You literally threw yourself in front of a killing curse! I understand that you survived one when you were a baby, but that is no reason to think you can do it again!" She said, the pieces finally clicking into place for Harry.

"What was I supposed to do Hermione? Watch you die? Just stand there?" Harry said, he was halfway between confused and agitated. She didn't truly think that he would do that. Yes he had a 'saving people thing' as she had once called it, but she had never scolded him about it in the past.

"Yes Harry, that is exactly what I expect you to do." She replied sadly. Hermione pinched the bridge of her nose as if to signify how futile she thought the explanation would be to him. "Whether or not I believe in Divination, doesn't much matter. Dumbledore believed the prophecy, but more importantly so does Voldemort. They both were and are incredibly skilled and powerful wizards. They had reasons to believe whatever Trelawney spewed out of her mouth, so the rest of the world doesn't have much of a choice but to follow along. Their reasons don't matter anymore, Dumbledore believed out of Hope in what you would be able to do, and Voldemort believes out of Fear of what you will be able to do. They both believed in her words and now the rest of the world is held hostage to that. It's a blessing and a curse." She said exasperatedly. Harry could tell that she had put a lot of thought into this. Her words were heartfelt, but if he had to guess, they were most likely written down somewhere either in a journal or on a roll of parchment, essay style. He knew better than to interrupt her now.

"The world believes in these things now more or less because of what those two believed. For better or worse, the wizarding world follows the same train of thinking. There may be others out there that could kill Voldemort and send him back to the hell he crawled out of, but if you had died yesterday, the war would have been handed to them before it even started. The Death Eaters confidence would have skyrocketed causing them to be more and more dangerous and outgoing with their attacks on the world. That kind of momentum would overrun the rest of us in a matter of weeks. Simultaneously, the morale of our side would have been more or less destroyed with you. They all believed in Dumbledore's words, so to lose you would be like losing the war in one fell stroke. Between those two things, your death would have more or less ended the war before it started." Hermione said, her eyes fluttering closed as she came to a soft stop

"The prophecy doesn't have to be true anymore Harry, because in the eyes of the world, and in the heart of this war, the prophecy is true. You are the keystone to both sides. It will come down to the two of you because everyone believes that it will. This entire war is the definition of a self fulfilling prophecy." Hermione's words started to sink in for Harry. There was always a part of him that believed in the prophecy, but Harry realized that for the most part that was because Dumbledore had told him that it was true. He had wanted to deny it, because it didn't make much sense, he had no special powers. He was just a sixteen, almost seventeen year old boy. The idea of an entire war resting on him had sounded ridiculous at the time, but Hermione was right. It didn't matter anymore, since both sides believed that it was true.

"You have a bigger responsibility to our entire world than saving my life in a situation like that. I know your heart Harry. There is an entire world out there that is counting on you for better or worse, I know that has to speak to your Gryffindor sense of courage somewhere." Hermione finished, her eyes imploring him to understand or show some sign of agreement with what she was saying.

"I can't believe that you would ask me something like that. That you would ask me to sacrifice you, the person who has never abandoned me, for a world that has turned their back on me every time it wasn't convenient for them. You want the lives of my friends to mean so little to me. All the while telling me that I have a responsibility to them. What kind of monster do you want me to be?" Harry was sweating now across his brow.

"I killed FOUR people yesterday. I DESTROYED them! And in addition to living with that, you are asking me to do it alone." Harry realized that he was bubbling with rage. She was asking him too much. She was asking him to become the thing he hated. Thoughts of wanting to apologize finally getting pushed to the edge of his thoughts.

"The entire world may be resting on my shoulders, but that world has turned its back on me so many times I can't even keep count. How many times have I been the villain in the papers? How many times have I had my entire reputation dragged through the mud because of someone's opinion of me in our government? I've been called crazy mere days after watching a classmate die in a tournament I should never have been part of! I have had to endure more or less torture at the hands of some ministry appointed 'teacher' because I tried to warn them. I tried to tell the truth about what was happening in our world, and I was crucified for it. The world that you and I find ourselves part of has been far from kind to you and me these past few years. At the end of the day, yes they are people and if there is something I can do to help them, you know the Gryffindor in me will make every effort to do that, but there are lines Hermione! There are lines that I don't know I can cross, and if I do, who will I be on the other side? If that situation was to play out again, and I sacrifice you for the good of that world, a world that may turn its back on me any time, I don't know what will become of me on the other side of that choice." Harry didn't seem to be able to stop himself from talking at this point. "And on top of that, I'm suppose to sacrifice you and anyone else it takes to save the masses?" Harry let the words slide from him with disgust.

"No! That's not what I'm saying at all and you know it!" Hermione said on her feet again. "There are people you aren't thinking of! Think of all the students at Hogwarts who are too young to understand. What will become of them in a world ruled by Death Eaters. What about all the other Muggle borns in the world? They need you more than I do." Hermione finished sad and clearly hurt.

"Well I don't know what to tell you. I can't do what you are asking. And if you really expect me to do that, then stay here where it is safe. So I don't have to make that choice." Harry said, stubborn anger flashing in his voice.

"No."

"Pardon?"

"I said no." Hermione said, her lip trembling.

"I won't do what you are asking. If you want to help, you have to accept that."

"That's not fair. That is way too much…."

Harry interrupted her. "What? Way too much pressure!?"

"I didn't mean it like that…." Hermione tried to backtrack, blushing harder, clearly seeing the mistake she had made.

"I'm asking for your help here Hermione! If you are going to come in here and explain all the logical reasons why the world rests on my shoulders, then you are just going to have to grow the stones to accept that I have conditions on carrying said responsibility." Harry said, not letting himself be put off by the downcast look on her face.

"So what's it going to be Granger? Are you going to help me? Or just tell me all the reasons why I should let you DIE if the situation comes to it." Harry spit out, feeling his face grow heated with every world that passed his lips.

"You know damn well I'm going to help you Harry. I've promised you that a thousand times. I'm not letting you do this on your own. However, I need you to take your head out of your ass for one second and realize that you aren't the only person afraid of losing someone you care about! What will I do if you sacrifice yourself for me? Hmm? I'll have to watch the entire world burn, without you! You talk about the Harry that will come out the other side of that situation, well what about the Hermione that will come out of mine? Not only will I have to watch the entire world collapse and there won't be anything I can do about it, but I will have to do it alone! No one can do this but you! That is the most important thing, not me." Hermione said tears starting to pool in her eyes by the end.

"Is that who you see me as now Hermione? The Chosen one?" Harry said, his tone dead flat. No emotion whatsoever. It was as if the emotions drained out of him.

"Of course...no...that's not what..." Hermione stumbled through her words, tears lining down her cheeks as she swept out of the room.

Harry slowly slid back into the headboard of the bed and felt himself sink into the pillow behind his head. His eyes seemed to shift in and out of focus for a minute, and he felt like had lost the desire to even blink. His mind had started buzzing the minute that Hermione had explained to him why he needed to listen to her. Because she saw him as some kind of symbol, some kind of weapon, just like everyone else. There was a small voice in the back of his head that was screaming that Hermione didn't mean it that way and there was every reason he was just reading into it too much. Despite the fervor in which the voice was yelling, it was still small.

Blocking out the voices of reason seemed to take no effort at all as he blankly stared upwards. There was a whole treasure trove of logical thoughts and reasons hidden in his mind, but at this very moment, he found himself unable to access them at all. All he could hear was the screaming inside his head. The voices jeering his name or begging for his help. The eyes blaming him for being too slow. The pressure built in his head until he could hear his heart hammering against his ribs. He could feel his pulse rising rapidly and his breaths came more hitched.

The thoughts and feelings that were rushing through him were too complex to put into words. Tangled balls of fear and pain that rolled through every part of him, seeming to find every single thing wrong and point it out to him. Thoughts of Hermione and what she saw him as, of what it would feel like to be alone at the end. How it might be better if he just got it over with. The lines of thinking that his mind tried to draw were so complex and twisted that he couldn't even follow them in the nightmare that he was living right now.

His hands shook as he balled them into fists. Images racing through his vision of all the worst things that he ever imagined. Now with the added dread of how desperately alone he was. If Hermione felt that way about him, then there was no one that understood him. The small voice that was trying to tell him that none of that was true, was drown out by the screaming of all the others.

He heard footsteps in the hall and he waved his hand forcefully at the door causing it to slam shut, rattling the walls around the frame. Harry didn't want anyone to see him like this. He was just so angry, so hurt, so upset, so many things. He was all of them at once and it was bursting out of him. The wallpaper singed at some of the corners and static arcs flipped end over end on the bedspread.

Screwing his eyes shut, he started counting. Angry tears leaking from the corners of his eyes, the salt burning the cuts on his dry cracked lips. Focusing everything he could on the numbers rolling through his head.

_one_

_two_

_three_

As the numbers passed, he found himself with less room in his brain for the thoughts of his fears and nightmares. Slowly the ambient magic faded and his breathing calmed. By the time he got to three hundred, he fell into a fitful sleep.

* * *

Harry unfurled himself from the tight ball that he had curled himself into before falling asleep. His mind was clearer now, having had the chance to shut down for a while. With a few steadying breaths, he slid into a sitting position and tried to put his thoughts back together.

Hermione was worried about the war and about all the people that were in danger. She wanted to take care of all those people. She had always had self esteem problems, maybe that was why she was so eager to sacrifice herself for the good of the cause? Harry went through reasons and reasons of good examples of what Hermione had likely meant in that conversation. His hurt and fear from earlier seemed somewhat out of proportion, but her words had still hurt. Harry was sure that Hermione didn't actually believe that about him, but in that moment, that was what he had heard. That had become his reality.

Another few deep breaths, he had to fix this situation with Hermione. After everything that had happened, Harry felt so out of sorts. He was out of his comfort zone, worried, confused as to what happened still. There were so many questions floating through his mind, that Hermione's wording on something during that conversation seemed like the last thing he should be thinking about. Scattered was too kind of a word to use to describe how he felt inside.

Now having a pounding headache, Harry looked around the room hoping to find a pain relieving potion to have magically appeared in the room for him. Finding nothing, he prepared to lift himself out of the bed when the sound of the doorknob turning distracted him.

The door opened to his room yet again and Harry opened his eyes somewhat hoping that it wasn't Hermione. When he realized who it was, he was even more disappointed. Dan Granger strode into the room, a stern look on his face. He sat in the only other chair in the room and stared at Harry pointedly not saying anything. Harry stared back not really sure what was going through the mans mind as he did so. There was a lot of different emotions that Mr. Granger had every right to feel and Harry didn't blame him for a second if all of them were terrible things about Harry. For Merlins sake, the man had just lost his house and almost his life because Harry had decided to hang out for a few hours too long.

"You make parenting very difficult right now son." Dan said in a monotone voice. It wasn't specifically unkind, but it also wasn't soft by any stretch. "On one hand, you made my daughter cry again. On the other hand, from what I understand, you literally threw yourself in front of certain death to save her. Furthermore, on the third hand that I don't even know how to address yet, you saved my wife and I as our house literally exploded around us." Dan said sighing and leaning back in his chair.

"I'm sorry that I upset Hermione, but I don't think that I can do what she is asking me to do." Harry said not dishonestly. Skipping right past the uncomfortable praise from the older man.

"And what is it that she wants you to do?" Dan asked quietly.

"She wants me let her die if I have to."

Dan looked at him for a few more seconds, a hard stare that seemed to read him more thoroughly than Snape had during his Occlumency sessions.

"And you can't do that?" Dan asked.

"No I can't. I can't stand by and let something happen to her if I could stop it."

"See, that is the kind of bullshit attitude that has my baby girl crying in the first place." The harshness of Dan's voice brought Harry's head forward once again. "Do you really thinks she is some delicate flower you are going to hide away in a back room. Lock her in with some spells and hope to keep her safe? Is that the kind of opinion you have of her? I watched as she literally speared a man to a wall. Do not, I repeat, do not disrespect her by assuming you can tell her to stay back and let the 'men' deal with it." Dan said leaning forward rather dangerously in his chair.

"She thinks she is less important than me. That I shouldn't risk myself for her. If that is the way she is going to fight…then how can I let her be out there with me? She will do something insane to protect me. I can't risk that. I don't know how to keep her from the fight, but I have to think of something don't I? Don't I owe her that?" Harry lowered his eyes as he spoke to the glowering father.

"I'm going to go ahead and give you the benefit of the doubt because we know somewhat how you grew up. Let me explain something to you though, she will do something insane to protect you, because she cares about you. And you will do the same for her. You don't jump in front of a bullet for someone that you don't have strong feelings about. Hermione is far too strong to be sheltered by anyone, even you, that isn't how you treat a loved one. This is a war no doubt, what are you willing to sacrifice to win it? Sure she may survive it if you push her away, but do you think that it will have done any less damage to her?" Dan's tone was somewhere between angry father and caring father. Neither of which Harry was super acquainted with.

"Do you trust her?" Dan said clearly.

"Yes. Beyond a shadow of a doubt."

"Then why would you deprive yourself of a team mate that could turn the tide of a fight? Why deprive yourself of her knowledge and passion for magic? It is called cutting off your nose to spite your face." Dan's eyes bored into Harry's. "You've said it yourself how many times she has saved you, and you her. If she means as much as you say, and you trust her as much as you claim. Then when it comes to that war outside, she will be the one at your back, and you at hers. Don't take that away from her, and don't take that away from yourself." Dan said as he stood.

Harry stared at him as he did so, slowly coming to an understanding of what he had to do. "But sir, if she values my life over her own, doesn't that kind of tip the balance?" Harry asked, trying to piece together the complicated web of what an adult relationship might look like.

"Ask yourself Harry, who's life do you value more? Because if I am right in my guess, and I'm 99% sure I am, then you will see that the balance is maintained just perfectly." The older man gave Harry a curt nod in response to Harry's blank open mouthed expression, and then he left the room.

* * *

Hermione stalked down the hallway and out of the room that Harry had been resting in. She was biting her lip hard enough that she thought that any second she would be drawing blood. Tears threatened at the corners of her eyes, but she didn't want people to see her crying. Not right now. All of this was her fault anyways. Her parents had lost everything because she had been mad at Harry and forced him to leave Privet Drive. The more she traced back the lines of choices that made up their current situation, the more she was overwhelmed by it.

Harry wasn't willing to see sense and understand what kind of symbol that he was to the people. She was telling herself over and over again that she was right. This mantra was competing against the overwhelming guilt and shame that she felt in how she had spoken to Harry. She had completely put her foot in her mouth and said the things to him that he he hated hearing from others. For the first time he finally started opening up to her and telling her things, and she had shut him down by treating him like some kind of weapon or a flag to rally under. He was a person, she knew that, and she had still let her words get away from her. Logical connections were easy, understanding people was so much more difficult and delicate.

Hermione hadn't meant to say those things to Harry, she was just so scared. That was the sense that was welling up inside of her most. It was making her say and do things that she didn't normally do, she was scared. Her Gryffindor bravery wasn't kicking in and she felt herself sink closer to the fear. Harry had almost died, her and her parents had almost died. All because she was scared. She had been scared for Harry's wellbeing and it had made her make a set of choices that led them to this moment. With Harry in arguably worse shape than he was before and her parents lives turned upside down.

Finding herself in a smaller room on the far end of the headquarters, she slammed the door behind her. Small nips of static electricity sliding off her fingertips as she swiped at the door to close it. The room was mostly bare, it looked like it had been a formal sitting room of some kind, fancy chairs covered with sheets and an official looking table in the middle of the room. Grinding her teeth in frustration at herself and the situation they were in, Hermione felt her emotions boil inside of her, shame, guilt, anger, and fear all rotating like a slot machine in her head.

She leaned over the table, her breathing shallow.

_So. Stupid._

She slammed her fist down on the table.

_So. Cowardly._

Another slam.

_So. Useless._

A third slam of her fist and the table creaked and shattered down the middle. The two halves broken apart by an angry red crack down the middle with small trails of smoke curling upwards from it. The pieces slid to the floor and Hermione was left standing over the ruined table, her shoulders hitching with her breathing and sweat beading on her head.

"Well that was impressive." Her mother said from the doorway behind her. Somewhere in the smashing of the table, Hermione had clearly missed the door opening behind her.

"I just needed some space Mom." Hermione said, staring down at her still throbbing hands.

"Needing space is taking a small walk around a garden to clear your thoughts. Carving a table in half with your fist is a bit more than that don't you think?" Jane said with a small smile on her face. She pulled the covering off of one of the chairs, making a surprised face at the quality of the chair hiding beneath before sitting herself down and calmly putting her hands on her knee, nodding gently to the window and the seat on the other side of the room.

Hermione stalked to the side of the room with the window and perched herself on the ottoman that was sitting under the small window. At this point there was no where else in the house she would want to go. She didn't want to see anyone else right now, and certainly not Harry. Hiding in this room was the best option she had, and if her mother was clearly not planning on leaving, then Hermione didn't have much choice but to get comfy.

"So what are you feeling right now?" Jane asked quietly.

"I'm angry." Hermione said, staring down at her hands still.

"At who." It was half question, half statement. One of those things people say to indicate a rhetorical question. Hermione grimaced in her head, her mother wasn't going to give up on this.

"Me. I'm angry at me." Hermione said with a sigh.

"Why? Because you thought your friend was in danger and did what you could to protect him? Because you are afraid that he might die saving you?"

"Yes! Because then it will be my fault if the war is lost. And I know that I won't have the strength to keep going if he dies like that. I can't." Hermione screwed her eyes shut and tried to talk the tears out of spilling.

"Oh, if you have that much control over things, and you are so important, then could you go ahead and win the war real quick?" Jane said, dripping with sarcasm.

"Excuse me?" Hermione was angry at being mocked like this.

"You don't have control over these kinds of things Hermione, good and bad. You are so incredibly smart and gifted in so many things, but Hermione you aren't a god. You don't have the power all by yourself to win or lose the war."

"I know that! That's the problem!"

"No, you aren't getting it. You are so confident in your understanding of the situation that you are the one responsible for it's outcome." Jane said, the corners of her mouth turning down.

"Well of course, I'm the one that has done the most research. Without Dumbledore there isn't anyone that knows more of what to do than me right now. That's why this is all so upsetting!" Hermione said, not really hearing the words spilling out of her mouth.

"That's the point! None of that is true. This isn't about you alone. There are a ton of people in this house that are all fighting as well, take a moment to breathe and realize that you aren't alone. I know you, I know you aren't coming from a place of ego, but think what you are saying for a moment." Her mother said, her eyes imploring Hermione to understand.

"You aren't 'failing' by not being able to win the war on your own. Because it isn't something you could have accomplished in the first place. Do you think a fish feels sorry for itself that it failed at flying?" Hermione blinked at her mothers words.

She thought for a moment, letting the words in for real. Repeating what she had just said over and over in her mind.

"It's ok to be scared for all these people you care about, without taking responsibility for their very lives Hermione." Jane said quietly and kindly.

"I just don't want everyone to die, and I feel like if they do it's going to be all my fault." Hermione said and finally dropped the anger, her fear washed over her and she pulled her knees up to her chest, trying to hide her tears from her mother.

"I know sweetie, this is scary, I'm terrified too. But unlike you, I don't have any way to change things myself. You have this wonderful thing called magic, which lets you do incredible things. But you can't let that confidence blur your judgement. This is a war, people might die, and your magic might save some of them, but it might not be enough to save everyone." She said moving next to Hermione on the ottoman. "Are you afraid of losing the war, or are you afraid of losing Harry?"

Hermione broke. Sobs wracked out of her body. The image of seeing the bright green light, and then the next Harry diving in front of it. His back had been to her, from her point of view, the curse slammed into his chest and he was thrown backwards toppling over her parents. For a moment, she felt like her world had ended, Harry was dead. And that was when she had turned her wand on Greyback. She didn't think of the spell in particular, she had only seen a diagram in a book once, but she had just cast without thinking. The darts had speared him to the wall so hard because she had been pure rage and despair at that moment. Thoughts had left her head for those few seconds.

"I just don't want him to die." Hermione said. "I just want to keep him alive!" She burst out.

"And you can't." Her mother said with finality. "You can't do that for him, because you can't control him. If you think you can, then you are thinking of him in the same terms as everyone else, and it is pretty clear that you are the one person that he trusts to not do that to him. If you want to get him to the end, then you are going to have to accept that he is a person and not just something you can control. If you really want to keep him alive, do you think you will have more success at his side? Or commanding him what to do?"

Control. Hermione loved being in control of things. It was thrilling for her to have charge of a situation. And with a halt, she realized it was because she thought she knew better than everyone else. In her brain she realized that she was thinking that she was smarter than everyone else and that is why it was so hard to take when things didn't go according to plan. Seeing herself lose control over a situation was hard in and of itself, but seeing Harry put himself at risk because of it was mind numbing.

Hermione realized there was no way that she could 'force' Harry to behave a certain way 'for the good of the world'. Harry didn't have any reason to save that world. They hated him as often as they had loved him, he was right. War wasn't just about winning or losing, it was having something to fight for. If Harry didn't have something to fight for, then why fight? Her words to him about all the other people that were counting on him had been completely unfair. He should only pick up this mantel, this fight, if he really chose it. Sacrificing him for the rest of the wizarding world wasn't worth that.

_Oh._

She wasn't willing to sacrifice him for the rest of the wizarding world...Just like he wasn't willing to sacrifice her.

She didn't have an answer to her mothers question. "I'm just so scared mom." And she slumped over into the arms of her mother.

"I know sweetie, I know." Jane calmly said as she stroked Hermione's head while she wept.


	5. Chapter 5: Chrysalism

Chapter 5: Chrysalism:

_The amniotic tranquility of being indoors during a thunderstorm._

* * *

**Tuesday, July 30th 1997**

Harry stared out the window into the rolling landscape before them. The house they were currently staying in was closer to the ocean than Harry had realized. Brushing the southern coast near St. Austell the small home was one of the safe houses that had been created and secured in the early days of the war. Thankfully Dumbledore had thought far enough ahead to realize that they would not have the convenience of Grimmauld Place forever and took precautions as such. This house was fortunately a decent distance from London, giving them some obscurity by distance alone.

Remus had taken it upon himself to update the wards around the different safe houses and had chosen different secret keepers for each. As Bill Weasley had informed him later yesterday afternoon, this was "The current HQ of the Order of the Phoenix, located at Plymouth Keep." The remainder of Monday Harry had spent in bed, but after finally deciding he wanted to see more of the house than the dismal ceiling of his current bedroom he had wandered around the busy house for a few hours. It hadn't taken him long to catch up on the whereabouts of the Order. While Molly still attempted to prevent him from speaking to different members about things, he didn't pay her much mind. He was going to be seventeen very soon, and he wanted to know what was going on in the war he was supposed to lead.

Hermione had made it a point to more or less ignore him for the rest of that evening, retiring to bed early and not meeting his eyes. Harry had caught her a few times staring at him out of the corner of his eye. She seemed like she wanted to say something, but always decided against it. There were too many people in the house now to have a private conversation and it seemed that whatever she needed to say to him, she didn't want to say while others were around.

The people in the house seemed to constantly change. Harry had originally sought out Ron, but found that Ron was still at the Burrow with Ginny and Fleur. They were working on getting the house ready for Bill and Fleur's wedding which was to be at the end of the week. While this was an Order HQ, it was not the current home of the Weasley's. The "administrative board" seemed to be comprised of McGonagal, Arthur, Moody, Remus, and Kingsley. For the time being they voted on most of the major actions that the Order was taking in the fight agains the Death Eaters.

The split in their responsibilities was fairly clear anyways. Moody worked on the practical defenses of the different cells of the Order. Arthur worked on the logistical side of things within the Ministry. Being the head of the Muggle Relations office he brought quite a bit of information from his office. Kingsley worked directly with the Minister and thus had a set of ears into the politicking of the Wizengamot. Those being taken care of, that left Remus for recruitment, and McGonagal for protecting Hogwarts itself.

For all Dumbledore's great qualities, division of resources was never one of them. The man had lived his entire life keeping the entire plan to himself. Harry didn't need to be told that. his observation of how the people around him attempted to run the organization that he had created was enough proof of that. Everyone was managing to do their part, but there wasn't a sense of flow to it yet. They had been working together without his leadership since the beginning of June and they had yet to find a cohesion that seemed natural.

Harry had spent the majority of his young life without friends and without anyone to talk to. People watching had become something he knew well. His cousin had successfully scared off anyone from being friends with him when he was young, and thus he spent his time on the playground at school watching others. Learning about them through their actions and reactions. With his Uncle, he had learned to tell the key signs of someone moving up and down the range of anger all through facial expressions. Survival in the days of the cupboard had been dependent on knowing how far he could push his relatives for more food or freedom. It didn't take long for most of those skills to be put to use while he watched the flurry of activity around the Keep.

Hermione did her best to avoid him and spent most of the previous day with her parents. Harry didn't really begrudge her that; she hardly spent any time with them over the past few years and now that some of her secrets were starting to come out, their bond seemed to be mending fairly fast. The family had remained close despite Hermione's blurring of the truth with them, and of course, there was nothing like a near death experience to bring a family together.

 _Not that you would know what that was like. Your family hasn't had any_ _ **near**_ _death experiences._ A bitter voice snarled when the thought crossed his mind.

The Order members had taken different approaches to having Harry around. It was clear that they had been planning on him being in the Keep after his birthday, but there wasn't really a place for him here yet. The day to day grind of running an entire organization of vigilante crime fighters was taking its toll on everyone involved, especially without the guiding presence of Dumbledore. Arthur greeted Harry kindly, but was clearly torn about whether or not to include him in the discussions around the house. A glare from Molly set Arthur back in line and seemed to be the push the man needed to make a choice on that front. McGonagall was, in her own way pleased to see him. She had offered her condolences to Hermione and her parents for the destruction of their house and quickly had to move on to her other responsibilities. The decision to open Hogwarts hadn't gone through the board yet, but she remained confident that her school would reopen come the first of September.

Remus was still trying to find his place somewhere between caring professor and responsible guardian. Harry cared deeply about the man, but it was clear that all the new interpersonal relationships that he was dealing with were starting to put him on edge. The lycan had spent most of his life in some form of reclusion. With the exception of the years spent at Hogwarts with Harry's parents, Remus had lived his life more or less alone. Now, being surrounded by people that called him friends and didn't shy away from his condition, the man behind all of those scars was starting to come out. Remus's relationship with Tonks was the thing that put him on his back foot the most often. The year before it had been clear that Tonks had feelings for him, but apparently it had taken the better part of a year to get him to admit the same.

Moody and Kingsley seemed to be on opposite ends of the Harry spectrum. Shacklebolt wasn't keen on Harry being involved in anything whatsoever and made that fairly clear.

"While I appreciate what you did for her family, this is a war that needs to be left to the adults to fight." the large Auror had said to Harry the previous afternoon, placing a placating and condescending hand on Harry's shoulder. "Come see me after you have graduated and we can talk about finding a place in the Auror Corps for you." Harry didn't think anything about that statement had been realistic at all, but he kept it to himself.

Moody on the other hand, impressed with what Harry had managed to accomplish at the Granger house, acted like Harry had passed some test. Moody's offer to refine some of Harry's skills over the next few weeks was something Harry planned on taking him up on.

Harry pressed his forehead to the glass pane of the window feeling the coolness spread to his face. The rain outside smattered against the windows in a drumming fashion that seemed to lull Harry in and out of his thoughts. The library where he was seated had plenty of larger chairs to sit and read in, but it only had one south facing window over looking the coast and the English channel beyond. The dreary day seemed to be appropriate for the day before his seventeenth birthday. The day he would finally be able to use magic whenever he wanted. The day that he would become an 'adult'. Despite having seen and done more than most adults twice his age, he was still being treated like a child.

The destruction of the Granger house had opened Harry's eyes to how fast things could go pear shaped in the heat of the moment. It hadn't taken but five minutes between the wards falling and Harry passing out under the strain of the collapsed house. His luck was running out and this was not the time for that to start happening.

The thoughts still swirled in the darker corners of Harry's mind. The same questions coming up over and over again. _Why am I doing this at all?_

 _Because it is the right thing to do._ the voice in his head told him adamantly.

 _Since when have they done right by you?_ That was the question that Harry was having a tough time coming to terms with. He asked himself over and over again why he was even willing to do this. Why did Dumbledore ask this of him? If in a hundred and fifty years, Dumbledore hadn't managed to kill Voldemort. Why in the world would Harry say "yes" to something like that?

 _Hermione has even forgotten that you are human._ The darker voice persisted into his thoughts. The thunder crashed in time in the background with the darker thoughts. As if to punctuate the strength of Harry's misery.

 _You know she didn't mean that. You know that sometimes she says things without thinking since her brain is so far ahead of her mouth._ The voice of reason was strong, at the moment, but it slipped in and out during the day. There were moments where he could clearly conceptualize the fact that Hermione hadn't forgotten he was human and that she saw him as more than a sum of his responsibilities. And yet, there were other times when he was utterly trapped in his loneliness.

Harry slid his forehead down the window a little more, trying to press the conversation in his head out through the the glass.

The thing that he kept coming back to was, there were two options. Either Hermione didn't mean what she said and he still had a teammate like her father had suggested. Or, Hermione did mean the things she said, and in that case he might as well just go off and try to end this, so that way at least they would be safe.

The drumming of the rain outside increased and Harry heard the first few splashes of thunder in the distance. The lightning lit up the afternoon sky only briefly, the milky clouded skyscape swallowing the flashes and letting the thunder announce its presence. There was something calming about being inside during days like this. As someone from Britain, rain and storms was something he was used to. While it was true that as a child storms had driven Dudley and sometimes his friends indoors where it was much easier to torment Harry, there had been blessed times where he had been left to his own devices and he had done much like he was now.

Soft footfalls approached the door. Cautious in their pace, but determined, and not faltering. It could only be Hermione. "Harry?" A voice that wasn't inside his head came from behind him and he lessened the pressure of his forehead on the window to turn around and face Hermione.

"Hermione." Harry said, with a guarded tone of voice. Hermione flinched at the lack of emotion. The thoughts crashed against one another in his head, oscillating between hoping that she was here to apologize, and afraid that she was here to push him more to be a hero.

"I'm so very sorry." Hermione said, her head hanging and her eyes tearing from his gaze as they shifted to the floor. "You scared me the other day. I thought you had died. I didn't see that you had survived the curse until after you hit the ground. I was just so scared." A tear slid down her cheek as the words came out in a rush.

"I didn't mean to scare you Hermione. I didn't know what else to do." Harry said, honestly, again riding the waves between his different emotions.

"I thought I had just watched you die, and it made me realize that I never want to see that happen. Ever. I can't even bear the memory of that moment. I didn't have the thoughts in my head right, and I shouldn't have tried to talk to you until I had thought about it more." Hermione shook her head, stopping herself from trailing away into a litany of excuses.

"I don't give a damn if you save the world or not. The only thing I care about is you living through it. And I was terrified that I would be the reason you died. It's selfish I know," she choked for a minute on her words. "Selfish and cowardly. Just because I was afraid doesn't give me the right to make you responsible for for my fear. I hope you can forgive me."

Brightness seemed to rush through Harry's brain. His worst fear drained out of him. She was just scared. Just like he was. They had both killed people a few days before. They had both almost watched the other die a few days before. They had almost died together anyways. They were both _terrified_. And that was ok.

"Of course I forgive you Hermione. I'm scared too. I thought I was going to watch you die and I just..acted." Harry said, his voice even sounding more real to him all of a sudden.

"I would have done the same if the situation was reversed. And not because you are 'oh so important to the war', but because you are 'oh so important, to **me** '. If both of us are just trying to protect the other all the time, then we have a much better chance together than apart. If you'll still let me help, that is." She said, her insecurities running deep in her voice.

Harry faced a crossroads in his mind. This was the moment. This was his final time to make this decision. The next set of words that he would say would change everything from here on out. Hermione was asking if she could come. She felt so bad for what she had said, that there was this one moment where he had the chance to push her away.

If he said yes, then he was taking her down with him. There would be no turning away, no turning back after that. They would be in it together until the war was done or they were dead. That was how Hermione was and that was how Harry was. Deep down, that kind of determination was something that they shared. No matter what he chose, she could still die. It was just a question of if she would be with him when she died or not.

 _If you ran away, and let her die here alone, then it wouldn't be your fault. And that's what you're really looking for isn't it?_ The voice in his head jeered at his shame.

She might die either way, but when it came down to it. When the final line was drawn. He couldn't reject her help, cause her that kind of pain, and then leave her to die. The only way they had a chance to win and actually keep one another alive, was together. Not apart. That being the case. There was only one option.

"We might die."

"I know."

"We might not win."

"I know."

Harry made his choice. He had made enough excuses. He had protected his pride enough. He had tried to trick himself into thinking he was doing the right thing by pushing her away. He had tried as hard as he could. But none of that was the truth.

"Hermione I...I need you." Harry said, his voice catching unexpectedly. "I know it might be asking you to die with me, but I don't know if I'm strong enough to do this alone." Harry hung his head. Saying the words, admitting that he couldn't do it, admitting that he needed help even though it was putting her in danger. It burned. It scorched his skin. But this was the right thing to do, not the easy thing.

Hermione burst forward and wrapped her arms around him. Leaning her face into his shoulder and shaking slightly. After a few deep breaths she pulled her face away enough for her to come back into focus in his vision and softly placed her hands on his cheeks. Her eyes were steel, her jaw set solid. Determination flooded every feature of her face. "Then I'm coming with you. To the end. Wherever that is." She paused for a moment and whispered, "I need you too."

"When I think of all the people counting on me, it seems crushing." Harry said in a voice barely above a whisper. "But when I think of you counting on me, I just feel...more determined. It makes me want to win. Not because I feel like I have to, but because I want to. I want Moody to train us, if we are going to do this together, I want to do it right. Will you be the one at my back Hermione?" He said, letting the question trail off into the quiet room.

"Always."

* * *

**Wednesday, July 31st 1997**

The morning of his birthday dawned like any other. Harry stretched in the bed and thought about his past birthdays. His birthday historically hadn't been much of something to celebrate. In the recent years his friends had made him feel special over the summer when they could and the small presents had kept his spirits up in the months between school years. However, his birthday had been treated much like Christmas while he was growing up. Something for Dudley to have while Harry watched.

The difference today of course to Harry was much more significant. He blinked his eyes open to get the sleep out of them sufficiently. He had been able to sleep much better now that he wasn't worried about his row with Hermione anymore. Slipping a hand under his pillow Harry grabbed his wand and pointed it at his clothes laying in a heap at the foot of the bed.

 _"_ _Scourgify"_ Harry muttered under his breath and he watched as the dirt particles and grime from the previous day were dissolved out of his clothes. He smiled to himself as he pushed the covers down and slipped into his jeans and trainers. Yanking a plain white t-shirt over his head, he shoved his wand into his back pocket while stepping outside his room to face the day. With a quick trip to the bathroom, Harry got another chance to use his newly unlocked abilities. A few charms later and Harry's teeth were brushed, his stubble whisked off his face. Getting to use a spell without fear of having his wand snapped was a terrific weight off his chest. Harry loved magic and the ability to have it at his disposal without restrictions was…liberating in a way that he hadn't expected.

It was still a fairly early hour for everyone in the house. The sun was up, but there wasn't much activity in the Keep yet. The only permanent residents at the moment were Remus, Mad-Eye, the Grangers and himself. While he was sure there would be others visiting throughout the day like usual, there was something serene about the morning hours. In summers past when he had stayed at the Burrow, there was always something going on. Being the first one awake was not something you could expect unless you stayed up nearly all night. Molly had a knack for being up before her children and Harry hadn't been able to best her at that game quite yet.

Harry sat down again at the window he had observed the thunderstorm from the previous afternoon. He slowly nursed the cup of tea in his hands, feeling the warmth spread through his fingers. The warming charm that he had used on the water had gotten it to just the right temperature for his liking. Much more precise than letting it sit over a fire and guessing for when it was boiling. Magic truly was wonderful.

"Good morning Harry." Jane's voice came softly from the hall. Harry turned and smiled. Even in the small amount of time he had come to know the elder Grangers, he had a quick fondness for them. They were very special to Hermione, and that made them special to him in a way. "Happy birthday! Hermione tells me that seventeen is quite the occasion in your world," She said, pulling him into a warm hug that he returned.

"I suppose. The age restriction is something that we all adhere to out of fear of having our wands snapped, but as you saw the other day, when push comes to shove, we do what we have to." Harry responded. "You know though, hearing you say that for some reason just doesn't sound right." he said, cocking his head to the side.

"I don't follow?" Jane said. Her eyebrows furrowing much the same way her daughters did when she was puzzling something out.

"You say 'my world' like I live in something you don't. There is only one world as far as I can tell. Just filled with people that have different talents. I can't help but think the 'your world' vs 'my world' mentality is what started this kind of war in the first place." said Harry, realizing why the phrasing had made him somewhat uncomfortable in the past. It was easy to forget these kinds of things when you spent ten months of the year where it was normalcy. However, the reality was that the wizarding public was quite steeped in old school ways and traditions that didn't keep up with the rest of the world. The way they described themselves and people who were different than them belied a problem within their societies structure that had gone unnoticed to Harry for years now.

"Well said Harry," Jane said, her brow un-furrowing. "Most people your age don't pick up on things like that. Yet the spread of prejudice, like most things, is a bell curve. Only in the extremes do you find people that speak out as boldly as these Death Eaters seem to. The majority of people fall into the middle, where their way of life hides the different prejudices they have. They still have them, the difference being in how they express them." she said sitting down next to him on the cushioned bench.

"You know I never got the chance to thank you for what you did for us the other day. Everything happened so fast and it seemed like everyone in the room had something to offer but me. I can't help but feel slightly ashamed about that." Continued Jane, changing the subject.

"You don't have to thank me." Harry said, feeling some heat rise in his cheeks.

"I won't lie, I'm not a fan of the situation, but I know it's not your fault Harry. Even though it's dangerous, I'm happy that Hermione is doing something she is truly passionate about. I'm grateful that you are going to be doing this with her." Jane smiled and patted his cheek. "As crazy as this sounds, at your side is the safest place for her. We lost some 'stuff' the other day when the house collapsed, but we didn't lose Hermione. In fact now without all those things keeping us apart, we have spent more time with Hermione than ever and we are going to get a chance to do that all summer for the first time in a long time." Jane stood and tucked some of her hair behind her ear. "It's time you start seeing the good side of things Harry, because if you don't, the negatives will eat you alive. Or worse, you will forget the reason you are fighting this war at all."

Harry tried to find words to say, but once again he was caught between a rock and hard place. He didn't want to agree with her, but if he disagreed with her then he was just being stubborn. Apparently the ability to trap Harry in a conversation was something hereditary.

"Now enough of that, let's see if we can get some breakfast started. Hermione will be down in a few minutes, and you know how she is without her morning coffee."

Harry didn't really have much of a chance to argue, so he just shrugged his shoulders and followed her into the kitchen. He flicked his wand a few times and coffee started warming itself on the counter before Jane could get there. She turned and they shared a small smile just as Hermione entered the kitchen.

She was wearing a white tank top and some pajama bottoms. For the wizarding occupants of the house her method of dress would cause a stir. Clothing was another example of the things that wizards were behind the times on. Most witches wore nightgowns that were much less revealing than what Hermione had waltzed into the room wearing. Harry grinned thinking about what Ron would do if he saw her dressed this way. Harry couldn't imagine what Ron would do if they went to the seaside and Hermione put on a bathing suit. He would probably faint.

"What are you smiling about birthday boy?" Hermione asked, nudging her way past him and to the now hot coffee pot that he had started for her. She poured herself a cup and took a small sip before turning to Harry again now with a smile on her face. "Happy birthday Harry!"

She gave him a small hug which he returned, again thinking about how happy he was that they weren't fighting anymore. "Did you have a nice chat with my mother?" she asked, stepping away from their embrace.

"I did. I seem to be having lots of enlightening conversations with your parents these days," Harry responded, taking another drag from his cup of tea and thinking about the conversation he had had with Daniel. Both parents had more or less said the same thing and Harry knew now that they were right. He appreciated their wisdom more than he had words for at the moment.

"So what do you want to do for your birthday today?" Hermione asked, taking a seat at the small kitchen table and crossing her legs. Something that Harry always had appreciated about Hermione was her ability to not hold a grudge. She had emotions like any other seventeen year old girl, but they never lasted longer than they needed to. They might have spent the past few days not speaking to one another, but now it was like having her back. It felt good.

"Well, like I said yesterday, I want to talk to Mad-Eye about spending some time teaching me some better methods of fighting rather than the 'seat of pants' style I've been perfecting over the years." Harry said, sitting across from her.

Jane snorted from across the room. While still stirring the bowl of eggs she was whisking she turned and leaned back against the counter, facing the two teens.

"So you mean to tell me that the display you put on at the house the other day wasn't something trained? That was you flying by the seat of your pants?" She had clearly assumed that Harry was making a joke.

"Erm, yeah? I mean all that stuff was just spur of the moment ideas and guesses. None of it was intentional enough to really count for much, and I have to say that most of my encounters in the past few years have gone just about the same way. I mean for Merlins sake, I would never have been able to kill a Basilisk in second year if it hadn't attempted to bite my head off while I was holding the damn sword in front of me." Harry absently rubbed the small scar on the inside of his forearm. Fawkes may have been there to save the day, but there was no real healing for a scar caused by basilisk venom.

"Basilisk?" Jane asked.

"It's a sixty foot snake that can kill you by looking at you. Same one that petrified me that I told you about." Hermione said waving her hand as if that explained it all.

"That's much bigger than I had pictured." Jane said looking back to what she was doing muttering quietly about 'that damn school'.

Harry turned to Jane intending to respond with some sort of an explanation, but Hermione didn't give him room to comment edgewise.

"That stuff doesn't matter anymore Harry, what matters is that you have survived every year. Let's focus on what we can do going forward rather than what we would have liked to do differently in the past ok? There isn't anything we can do about those things now. We can just learn from it and move on." Hermione exited lecture mode and turned her attention to the plate of breakfast foods that was being laid down in front of her.

"Ok ok, I suppose you are right. Though this coming from the same girl that used a time travel device to take extra classes comes across as slightly hypocritical you know." Harry laughed and thanked Jane as she placed a similar plate in front of him.

Harry looked down to see a face smiling back up at him from his eggs and bacon. He glanced over to see Jane laughing silently at his reaction. Growing up Harry had never had someone make him a smiley face with his breakfast so his surprise was evident on his face.

"Aww mum, you made Harry the birthday breakfast smile!" Hermione said slightly clapping her hands together with amusement. "It's so fitting for a seventeen year old!" Hermione said reaching over to pinch Harry's cheek while she laughed.

Stabbing his bacon with his fork Harry started to eat. It was only a few minutes later that Mad-Eye came into the room shrugging out of his large overcoat and hanging it on a hook by the door. Harry had assumed that the older man was still sleeping, but that was probably a bad assumption to make, Harry realized. Mad-Eye was always out and about and doing things for the Order. Sleeping in wasn't part of his wiring.

"Happy birthday lad." His magical eye spun around the room a few times before resting on Harry's face, aligning with his normal eye.

"Thanks Professor." Harry said out of habit.

"How many times do I have to tell you lot, I have never been your professor." He growled and stomped over to the stove jabbing his wand at a few things before walking away with a steaming cup of tea. Grumbling about how embarrassing it was to be trapped in his own trunk, he started towards the door.

Hermione kicked Harry under the table. "Mad-Eye, I was wondering...Hermione and I want to take you up on your offer to train us. I'm of age now and I want to be able to contribute and I want to learn with Hermione." Harry said more confidently than he felt.

Mad-Eye studied him and Hermione for a good thirty seconds before responding at all. His face seemed to sag a bit. "I don't like the idea of training you two to be soldiers, but there isn't much of a choice in the matter now. Lad your parents were soldiers before you in their own way. It would be doing a disservice to their memory to deny you the ability to fight the same way they did. I'll train yeh, but know this: it won't be easy. It takes years to make a good Auror." Harry felt a little crestfallen. There wasn't enough time. "But," continued Moody. "I figure without the Ministry setting the rules, I can do better than that. Both of you be ready Monday morning at six." The older man nodded to them both and walked out of the room, clunking his way up the stairs.

* * *

Harry was still unsure of how to behave on his birthday. Despite the most recent birthdays being almost all pleasant memories, it took a lot to wipe out a childhood of fear and distrust. Regardless of that, when later on in the day other members of the Order arrived at the house, Harry was sure that there was to be some sort of celebration.

"Hermione, is there going to be a big party or something? I don't know how I feel about some big celebration in the middle of all this war and such. Seems like a waste of time doesn't it?" Harry asked as he sat in the living room nursing a butterbeer, not really thirsty but just to have something to do with his hands.

"Maybe," She said, smirking at him. "Remember, sometimes during the darkest of times it is good to have something to celebrate. I wouldn't call this a big party, but there will be some people here tonight who want to wish you the best for your birthday. You don't see Bill and Fluer cancelling their wedding because of the war do you? Sure, it isn't going to be some spectacle like they had planned, but having something to celebrate and look forward to is good for peoples morale." Hermione explained laying a hand on his knee to reassure him that he wasn't putting anyone in danger by having a birthday.

"Great, so now I even have a responsibility to have a birthday party for the war. Anything else I can do? Donate blood? Give a kidney?" Harry asked, closing his eyes, downing the rest of his butterbeer, and dramatically throwing an arm over his forehead. Hermione smiled at his lame attempt to be a birthday martyr.

"Is this what you do when I'm not around? Laze about on a couch and drink?" A familiar voice called from the doorway.

Harry bounded to his feet and without much warning gave a very manly hug to the lanky red head, laughing all the while. Hermione was quick behind him to greet Ron as well. After the ups and downs of the past school year it would seem that the murder of the headmaster had managed to put some of their differences behind them.

Harry was grateful for the fact that Hermione had changed her clothes not long after breakfast before they had adjourned to the living room. She was wearing jeans and a snug fitting green sweater now that suited her. By no means was it as loose and concealing as the school robes tended to be, but it was much more neutral than the pajamas she had been wearing this morning. Harry was somewhat glad for that, and yet also disappointed.

"Happy birthday mate. Wish I could have come by the house earlier, but with everything that has been going on, mum wouldn't let me come by until today," Ron said, slapping Harry on the back a few times before taking a step back. "I've been working in the shop a bit with Fred and George over the beginning of the summer so I managed to actually have some gold to buy you a birthday present this year! Better late than never," Ron said, jovially reaching into his pocket and pulling out a small leather harness. "It's a wand holster," he said as he gestured for how to put it on. "You strap it to your arm inside your robes and it holds your wand. Flick your wrist back and your wand will jump to your hand. Best part is, if you are hit with an 'expelliarmus' while you have it in the holster, nothing will happen. The twins say they are dead useful and that most of the ministry Aurors use them." Ron explained.

"Thanks Ron, that is wicked cool!" Harry said, fumbling to attach it to his own arm. It was like putting on a watch but more awkward.

"Oh for Merlins sake, you are of age now Harry," Hermione chided softly. With a flick of her own wand the harness attached itself to Harry's arm and pulled itself comfortably snug. Harry smiled at her gratefully and slid his wand into the holster. A faint click could be heard as it nestled against the ridges. Harry flicked his wrist backward and as advertised the wand flicked into his waiting hand.

Something Ron said struck Harry's interest. "Hey Ron, how do the twins know what the ministry is issuing to their Aurors these days? Did they overhear something from one of the Order meetings or something?" Harry asked, absently fiddling with the straps on his new bracer.

Ron smiled. "Actually they have been taking quite a few orders from the Auror department recently. Some of their inventions caught a lot of interest after what happened at Hogwarts. The darkness powder and things like that. Madam Bones has been buying a lot from them recently now that a lot of the Ministry spending has loosened up a bit. Or at least that is what they are telling me." Ron said, seeming proud of himself for being in the know.

"Thats fantastic. Much better than them using their talents to sell love potions to young witches or making students barf on command," Hermione said, turning her nose up a bit and sniffing disdainfully. Harry had to smile at her rampant disapproval despite neither of the twins being students any longer. She hadn't quite let go of how difficult they had made her first year as a Prefect.

"I figured we could ask them for a few supplies before we," Ron glanced around the room, " _leave_ ", He said with an exaggerated wink that made Hermione roll her eyes.

The reality was that they didn't plan on going back to the school come September, but no one else knew that. Harry wasn't sure how much he really cared about it, but there it was. There would be some that would be disappointed with their decision, but it really wasn't in their hands anymore. Harry was now seventeen and he didn't need permission to make that choice. Would Molly be upset? Yes. Maybe even Remus as well. Despite all that, Harry was fairly sure that he was making the right decision. The things that the three of them had to do were more important than the disapproval of the elders.

As if summoned by his thoughts, a large barn owl came swooping in through the window to land on the back of the couch. Harry knew where the owl had come from simply by its posture. Hogwarts owls had a tendency to take their job insanely seriously and acted as such. Hedwig always tried to imitate them after one would come by. Harry never could quite tell if she was being sincere in her imitation or if she was, in her own way, mocking the self-serious birds. Either way, Harry always enjoyed the exchange.

Hermione's face went through a few different emotions rather rapidly. She was getting better at schooling her features faster than usual, but she still let certain things get to her. Hogwarts was one of them. She reached forward and snagged the small bundle of envelopes from the birds leg while simultaneously handing over a small treat she had procured from seemingly thin air.

Without saying anything she handed over the boys letters from the stack and held her own in her hands. Harry looked over the thick parchment envelope in his hands. He was familiar with the green ink and the feel of the parchment in his hands. Memories flickered through his mind as he stared at the neat script flowing across it.

_Harry Potter, the Living room_


	6. Chapter 6: Anecdouche

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Special thank you to my wonderful wife. She edited this chapter and did such a lovely job on it, I can't thank her enough.
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, the story is of my design, but all original credit goes to JK Rowling.

Chapter 6: Anecdouche:

_A conversation in which everyone is talking, but no one is listening._

**Wednesday, July 31st 1997**

He would never forget his first letter. The owls, the envelopes falling from the ceiling, and a giant coming to tell him his life had changed. The feeling of elation when he realized he was special and there was a chance he would get to the leave the life that he had hated so much behind. The green script now brought back the same kinds of feelings. Soon, though, they were tainted with the realization that he would not be going back. He would not be there for the opening feast. He would not hear the Sorting Hat's new song. That season of life had come to a close.

Hermione and Ron seemed to also be lost in their own thoughts. The three teens, all stared at their letters with far away expressions on their faces. Even Ron, who was always the first to be in favor of skipping out on school work, seemed to regard his letter with melancholy. Molly's outrage when she found out that her son wasn't going to go back to finish his education was going to set her off like a box of the twins' fireworks. Harry was sure that Hermione's parents were going to be more understanding, but they were liable to support Hermione in just about any decision she made. No, Hermione would be beating herself up just fine without anyone's help. Leaving of course Harry. With no relatives to care, no ever-watching Headmaster to police him, there wasn't going to be anyone judging Harry's choices on the matter.

"Do we open them?" Ron asked, turning his over in his hands and looking back and forth between Harry and Hermione. The latter two looked at each other, trying to divine what the most sensitive take on the matter was going to be.

Ever her practical self, Hermione spoke first. "There really isn't a point I suppose. I mean there isn't anything in here that is going to make us change our minds. The school is going to be too restrictive for us, and it would set a bad example. Professor McGonagall isn't likely to let us do as we please," Hermione said, making to throw the letter in the near by fireplace.

Harry reached out and stayed her hand. "No. You should read it. You deserve to read it." Harry said, holding on to her wrist lightly. The three of them all knew that there was a Head Girl badge in that envelope. Hermione deserved to see it in her hand, to know it was hers.

She smiled and patted his cheek affectionately. "Oh Harry, sometimes…" She blushed slightly, her eyes flicking to the other man in the room, and bent her head, allowing some of the hair to fall in front of her face. She busied herself with opening the letter and in her haste and distraction, missed the small pin that fell out and clattered to the floor.

As predicted, her mouth fell open slightly as she picked up the pin from the ground, the 'H' and 'G' glinting in the morning light. Harry thought it was no coincidence that the HG on the badge was her initials as well. She had been destined for the role. He didn't know how to properly show his gratitude to her. Knowing how badly she had wanted that badge, and knowing she was going to turn it down for him, was overwhelming.

"Don't know why you're surprised Hermione," Ron said, ripping the top half of his own envelope. "You were always going to be Head Girl." Ron started sputtering his own surprise when he pulled out a Quidditch Captain badge out of his letter.

"Congrats Ron! Congrats Hermione!" Harry said, now curious as to what pin was inside his letter.

The usual Hogwarts letter was inside, but it was accompanied by a second note that had a Head Boy pin wrapped inside. He stared at the badge confused and read the letter to himself first, much to Hermione's very apparent annoyance.

_"Dear Mister Potter, Happy birthday, I hope your coming of age finds you well this morning. I have sent the three of your letters together since I assume you will all be together when you open these. I have decided to not make you Quidditch Captain this year. I feel that it was always something that Mister Weasley would excel greatly in. You may be confused about the Head Boy badge, but the position wasn't always about having the top grades or doing the most extra things for the school. It was about being a leader for the other students. Someone they could look to with questions and could go to for guidance. Over the years yourself and Miss Granger have proven to be those people again and again. I have no doubt that making you two the Head Students is the right thing to do._

_That being said, I feel inclined to add that although Professor Dumbledore's portrait has yet to waken, he left me some letters concerning your last year of schooling. I don't want to discuss the details through owl post. Regardless, I'm sure the conversation will keep until we see one another again._

_Regards,_

_Minerva McGonagall_

The meaning in the last paragraph was blatantly clear. They would talk about whatever she was referring to from Professor Dumbledore here at the Keep. Harry wasn't sure how he felt about Dumbledore reaching out from the grave to have one last push on the direction of his life, but he pushed it aside roughly.

He was proud that she had chosen him for that kind of duty. Sad that he would have to turn her down. Scared that she thought he was someone that could lead people, and finally, confused about what he was going to do about it now. There was a large part of him that wanted to run back to the safety of the school and forget all of this ever happened. Maybe pass some of the information off to someone else who was better equipped to find the Horcruxes and end Tom Riddles unnaturally long life.

Those were all things he could do. At the same time, Harry knew that Voldemort wouldn't let it work that way. Hermione was right - no matter what he did now, Voldemort thought the prophecy was real and that was enough. Many people could die trying to keep Voldemort from him. Completely aside from the promises he made to Hermione, Harry wouldn't be able to forgive himself if that happened because he wasn't strong enough to fight.

Harry handed Hermione the letter silently letting her read it. Her eyes skimmed the page back and forth until they settled to stop at the end of the page and she looked up and met his eyes. There seemed to be an entire array of emotions there. Some of which mirrored his own. Though he was sure that she was much more disappointed than he was that he was going to have to turn this down.

"I'm sorry I have to turn this down Hermione. It would have been brilliant being a head student with you," Harry said, not breaking eye contact with her. He slowly reached out his hand to capture hers and gently placed his pin in her hand.

She smiled sadly at him. A slight moisture building up in the corners of her eyes. "Yes it would have. You would have made a brilliant head boy." She reached out and closed his hand around the pin, overlapping her hands over his own. "I've known for six years. Do you remember what I told you before you went to get the stone?" Hermione asked, eyes still on Harry.

Harry just nodded. That moment was always seared into his memory as the first time someone had believed in him. "Books! And Cleverness! There are more important things - like friendship, and bravery," Harry said slowly. He remembered that she had never actually finished that sentence. "Then you told me to be careful."

"You forgot love Harry. Friendship, bravery, and love. They are all more important." Ron shifted his weight from foot to foot uncomfortably. He made a small coughing noise as if to let them know that he was still in the room. She seemed to break out of her reverie. "And...we have a responsibility now," her eyes darted over to Ron, as if just remembering he was there. "And the days of fighting our battles as school kids has ended. It would have been brilliant, but it's our time to take the fight to them now. Together."

Hermione finally left a gap in the conversation long enough for Ron to chime in. "Hermione said it best, but I agree. We are in this together now. Our Hogwarts days were fun…erm, mostly, but the world is counting on us yanno?" He said, trying to show some emotion without showing too much. "Dumbledore always did say that it was our choices that made us who we are. I want to do this, that's my choice," He said with a tone of finality, eyes sharp with determination.

"Why Ronald, that was almost inspiring of you!" Hermione said smiling at him and clapping a hand on his shoulder. "I knew you had it in you somewhere!" she said with a smirk.

"I'm more than just the handsome one of the group I'll have you know! I can be deep and stuff!" Ron said, puffing his chest out.

The three dissolved into comfortable laughter, settling down on the couch to enjoy the mid-morning catching up.

* * *

**Wednesday, July 31st 1997**

Despite Harry's protests of 'you shouldn't have', guest started showing up in the late afternoon. Harry had attempted to protest more, but Hermione had stomped on his foot rather forcefully, reminding him that other people deserved to be allowed to celebrate this with him and that he shouldn't 'be too bloody noble for his own good.' He let the issue drop after that.

Harry ambled about the room while Mrs. Weasley prepared for dinner in the kitchen despite Dobby's loud protests. He spoke with the Twins some and spent some time talking to Bill since he hadn't gotten to know him very well over the years. Curse Breaking was incredibly interesting stuff and Harry wondered why they didn't teach those kinds of things at Hogwarts. When he mentioned this he got an angry glare from Hermione as she broke away from her conversation with Fleur.

"They do teach those kinds of things at Hogwarts you prat. You were just too lazy to take Ancient Runes or Arithmancy," Hermione said haughtily.

Harry had the decency to blush at least. "Well, I had…you know…quidditch and things to worry about!" He finished lamely, much to the amusement of everyone around.

Hermione started asking Bill about the specifics of some of the runes he used and Harry found it a good time to slip a bit further away from the conversation where he was bound to put a foot in his mouth again.

He spotted McGonagall and Mad-Eye having a quiet conversation with Arthur and Remus. Kingsley wasn't present at the moment due to some issues at the Ministry that he couldn't slip away from. Harry felt that having four out of the five showrunners for the Order was a good quorum to have for his request.

The four adults quieted as he came closer. "Happy birthday again Harry! Minerva was just telling me that you made Head Boy this year at Hogwarts! I'm so proud of you, and I know that your parents would have been just as proud," Remus said, giving Harry a warm hug which Harry returned. Harry had to rescind his earlier thoughts about 'not having anyone to let down'. There was a split second of weakness where Harry wanted nothing more than to just agree with the statement and get swept back to Hogwarts, but it passed and he pushed it out of his mind.

"Actually, that is what I wanted to talk to you all about. I…"

"Can't come back to Hogwarts this year?" the now Headmistress said in a flat tone, with just a hint of amusement in it.

"Erm, yeah? How did you know?" Harry asked, placing a hand on the back of his neck, suddenly even more uncomfortable than he had been a moment previous.

Moody grunted. "That'll be ten sickles Remus, and five from you Arthur," he said, and held out his hand. Harry gaped at the them.

"You all took bets on this?" Harry said, his uncertainty and uncomfortableness gone in a flash.

"Well of course we did. Dumbledore was quite secretive while he was still with us, but he did leave us some provisions in the unfortunate case of us having to go on without him. Your schooling was a point of upset for him. Albus was quite certain that if he didn't survive all seven of your years at Hogwarts, then you would likely not finish for one reason or another. His letters are vague as to why he thought that, but he did give us some indication as to what we might be able to do about it." McGonagall said lips forming a thin line as she spoke.

"You used the Head Boy badge as bait!?" Harry exclaimed, realization dawning on him all of a sudden.

"Not entirely Mister Potter. You were quite deserving of the title, but I did hope that, paired with Miss Grangers's obvious placement as Head Girl, that you would be more inclined to give it at least a second thought. Hogwarts will always be the safest place for you, as we all found out a few days ago at the Granger residence. I of course can't make any choices for you. You are an adult now. Though Remus's comment about your parents was an admirable attempt to not have to pay out on his bet." There was clearly amusement in her expression now.

The other three adults shared a laugh. Harry was completely caught off guard by the entire conversation, but his brain finally caught up and he managed to speak before the four of them went their separate ways.

"Well, since that is out of the way, I would like to become part of the Order officially. I'm seventeen now and I have had to do more than my share of the fighting already," Harry grimaced, finishing in what he hoped was a strong tone of voice.

"I second that request." Hermione stepped up beside Harry from behind, her hand finding his for a brief moment and giving it an encouraging squeeze. He glanced at her and smiled, grateful for the support.

"Oy! I second that second," Ron said as he slid over to them.

Arthur's reaction to him and Hermione had been surprised, but not overly. When Ron stepped up as well, his demeanor changed and his eyes started flicking around the room, trying to locate his wife before she located him. Mad-Eye was already nodding before the three of them had even finished the entire exchange, while Minerva and Remus didn't have an overt instant reaction.

"Well, er, you all are of age now. So I can certainly see that the request is valid. Let's all discuss it over dinner, shall we? Everyone gets a say in new members being included," Arthur said, attempting to sound more sure of himself that he was. Molly's reaction to Ron joining the Order was going to be quite the show.

A few minutes later Molly called everyone into the kitchen-converted-dining room area for dinner. The group gathered and Harry could tell that there was a level of unease from the patriarch of the Weasley family as he sat down next to his wife. The food was lovely, as always, and Harry enjoyed every bite as he watched everyone interact with interest. Hermione seemed to be observing as much as he, though she was also watching amusedly at her parents have a spirited conversation with Tonks and Remus.

Arthur cleared his throat. Since one of the requests had come from his son, the other three Order leaders appeared to be leaving the topic to him for the moment.

"Once again, happy birthday Harry. This has been a trying year for all of us, but I'm thankful we can all spend this day with you all the same." There were murmurs of agreement and a few tipped glasses in Harry's direction. "Coming of age is something incredibly important in our world. You have to start making choices that will shape your adult life and your future. However, we all know you have done that many times over already. In fact, there are quite a large number of people at this table who owe you their very lives because of some of the choices you have made. I may not be your father, or your godfather, but it has been a pleasure knowing you these past six years and I hope you know that you are always a member of my family in my heart." Arthur's words moved Harry. The feeling of being included in another family washed over him.

"Thank you Mr. Weasley," Harry said in appreciation.

"That being said, I, for one, think that you, Ron and Hermione would be fantastic additions to the Order, seeing as you have done so much for us already. It would be a slap in the face to turn you away now. You have my blessing," Arthur said, involuntarily flinching away from the glare his wife was sending his way. Her fork had stopped midway to her mouth and she was pegging him down with a death stare that would have driven Dementors away.

"They are children!" Molly finally seethed out. It seemed that the entire table started talking at once after that. Fred and George patting Harry on the back and nudging their brother in the ribs. Ginny asking them how they would do that from Hogwarts. Hermione's parents giving words of encouragement to their daughter. Hagrid booming about how 'it was just yesterday that he had picked Harry up from those dreadful Muggles'. Just about everyone was talking at the table at once. So many words were being slung around and questions being asked that it was blindingly clear that no one was even listening to anything anyone else was saying.

The only ones that hadn't jumped into the conversation yet were the three that the conversation was about in the first place. There wasn't much more they could say in their own defense, seeing as they didn't have anything they needed to defend themselves against. Arthur had said it best - they deserved to be in the Order as much as anyone else - and now that they were all of age, it was time to make that official. It was as simple as that.

"Enough!" Mad-Eye finally bellowed over the noise of the group. "Everyone can have their bleeding opinion about this later. Fact remains that they are of age and we are at war. A war that they have been more active in than most. They have my blessing too." He nodded to the three of them, his magical eye spinning around a few times before he went back to eating his food as if that had settled the matter entirely.

There was a few seconds of silence while Molly's protests paused for a moment. Even she was not one to interrupt the elder Auror when he spoke. A beat later though, she resumed her tirade. "Ronald you are going back to Hogwarts in September and you won't be able to participate anyways! This is much too dangerous for you and you need to focus on your studies!" She snapped this at Ron in particular but didn't bother hiding that she was speaking at Hermione and Harry as well.

"Seeing as they have already informed me that they will not be returning to Hogwarts in September, that isn't really relevant anymore Molly. Though I appreciate you being concerned for their studies and wellbeing," the Headmistress put into the conversation, her Scottish burr becoming a bit more pronounced with her annoyance. "You three have my blessing. I have been your head of house for six years now and I can't think of any students of mine that are more capable of taking care of themselves than the three of you," she finished, turning away from Molly.

Hermione looked like she was going to burst from the praise. Harry had to smile at that. She may not be Head Girl come September first, but the knowledge that McGonagall thought she was capable was worth more than the pin a thousand times over.

Molly blinked a few seemed truly speechless for a moment. "You will," her voice cracked and she closed her mouth fighting the urge to cry. A few drops slipped out but her strained expression stayed and she didn't give into the tears. "Most certainly be going back in the fall young man." As her words crashed into the end of her sentence, she shook her head, physically rejecting the information. Molly's original anger seemed to have been replaced by a palpable fear.

"Mum, I..." Ron started but stopped. He looked down at his hands in front of him before balling them into fists. "I believe in this. I want to help, I want to fight. Harry has saved how many of our lives?How could I not stand by him now?" Ron asked, beseeching his mother to understand. Harry was moved deeply by Ron's loyalty.

"Hogwarts is the safest place for all of you, and that's final," Molly said, setting her jaw and looking at Ron so hard that Harry thought he might fall over.

Ron didn't have an instant reaction. For a second he was sad. "No mum, I'm not. This is something I have to, and if you don't understand why, then you don't know me at all." Ron's words, while true, clearly cut Molly deep.

Molly was starting to deflate and Harry could tell that she was getting desperate for someone to agree with her. She reached out to the last people at the table from which she might find some support. "Daniel, Jane, you can't possibly agree with this! Hermione has such a promising career ahead of her if she finishes school! She shouldn't be wasting her potential like this!" Harry winced. He was sure that Molly hadn't meant the exact words that had just come out of her mouth, but what she had just implied wasn't going to go over well.

The table got very quiet. Molly hadn't noticed the relationship Hermione had with her parents or the trust that they shared.

Daniel was the first to respond. "Waste? I couldn't disagree more. Hermione has always been intelligent, but she has also always been independent and we have always trusted her choices. Just a few days ago we lost our entire home and everything we had worked for because of these terrorists. We support her one hundred percent. If she thinks it is best to support Harry in this, then we are behind her. The Grangers come as a package deal."

Jane followed up, eyes glinting with a bottled rage that Harry recognized well from Hermione. And Hermione could be scary when she was angry. "School is important, but Hermione isn't wasting anything. Harry risked his life for us when those…beasts attacked our house, and she stood by him. They fought those men shoulder to shoulder. Hermione never faltered for a moment, that is how strongly she believes in this...that is how strongly she believes in Harry," Jane smiled and reached out for her daughters hand across the table.

"My daughter was willing to stand facing trained murderers because she would rather die than back down from this fight," Jane smiled a tearful smile at them from across the table. "She believes in something so strongly that she is willing to die for it. I couldn't be more proud of her and her bravery. And I would never stand in her way," Jane said, the fiery passion fading from her eyes as she grasped her daughters hand with pride.

Molly looked gobsmacked. "Happy birthday Harry. I hope you know I just want what's best for you," she said softly as she walked out of the room. Molly being angry was something that everyone had expected. To see her absolutely shut down in the face of Ron joining the Order was upsetting in a different way. Harry knew that this wasn't just about the three of them joining the Order. Molly was so petrified to lose her children that she had just ... imploded. Harry felt terrible for the woman and took a moment to wonder if his mother would have been more like Jane or Molly.

"Don't worry son. I'll speak with your mother. She will be fine. She just wants you to be safe," Arthur said in his usual soft spoken tone of voice, comforting and reassuring as always. Ron nodded his response, looking a little put out over the apparent lack of support from his mother.

Remus chose that moment to cut in, mainly in part from the over exaggerated nudge that Tonks gave him from his side. "I would be remiss if I didn't warn you of the dangers of these choices Harry, but I can't in good faith stop you from joining the same organization that your parents fought for before you were born. You three also have my blessing." Harry locked eyes with the werewolf and nodded his thanks. The opinion of the man meant a great deal to Harry. Not only because he was the last link to his parents that Harry had, but for the place that Remus had taken in Harry's life all on his own. Harry realized that he cared very much what the unassuming man across the table thought about him.

Arthur coughed into the silence of the room. "Unless something noteworthy happens, there aren't going to be any meetings until after the wedding," Arthur said, trying to gather everyone out of their thoughts. "After that, we will make sure to let you know when they are going to be, though since two of you are staying here, I imagine that it should be fairly easy to let you know," the elder Weasley said with a smile.

"Does anyone know if mum took the cake with her? Or do we still get to eat that?" Ron said, his plate being cleaned quite some time ago.

Raucous laughter erupting from the table seemed to break the ice again and conversations resumed as normal, with everyone enjoying one another's company.

* * *

**Wednesday July 31st 1997**

Sometime later that evening after everyone else had filtered out of the house, it was down to just Harry, Hermione, Ron, Ginny, and the twins in the living room. Arthur had been the last to leave, warning the twins to make sure that Ginny got home safely later that night. He recognized that the younger generation wanted to spend some time together and was happy to give them their space.

The six found themselves sitting around the fireplace on the rather comfy couches in the den of the Keep, passing around a bottle of Firewhisky and taking large pulls in turn.

"You're so lucky Hermione! I wish mum trusted me half as much as your parents trust you!" Ginny said, taking a sip from the bottle and passing it to her brother who looked at her disapprovingly. While the twins had been the ones to supply the alcohol, Ron wasn't keen on the idea that Ginny was drinking with them. The rest of them were of age now after all.

"Gin's quite right about that Hermy!" Fred said, reaching across his twin and taking the bottle from Ron. Harry could practically hear Hermione's teeth grinding at the nickname. "Your parents are fantastic muggles in my book!" Harry winced a bit at the term, his conversation with Jane still rather fresh in his mind.

"Nothing like those morons that Harry was saddled with all those years!" George said, snatching the bottle back from Fred and taking a rather large pull on it himself. "Though they were quite a bit of fun to prank that one time. Remember how scared the fat one was?" George laughed, passing the bottle to Hermione who studied it as if she was unsure what exactly it was.

She thought for a moment and then took a dainty sip, testing the waters as it were. The burn took her by surprise and she coughed loudly while passing the bottle to Harry. He patted her on the back a few times and she cast him a grateful glance. "They have always supported when I wanted to try out for ballet when I was younger. I've never been the most graceful person on the planet, but I was especially awkward back then. They were both behind me all the way though, even when it was frighteningly clear that dancing was not my forte," Hermione said.

Harry almost coughed but it wasn't from the alcohol burning its way down his throat. Ron beat him to the punch though. "Something the great Hermione Granger wasn't good at right away? Now this is shocking. Has the daily prophet wrote an article on this yet?" Ron said, slapping his knee while he laughed at his own joke. Hermione grinned widely at his joke and actually stood to take a quick bow before falling back into the couch laughing while the Twins hummed "Dance of the Sugar Plumb fairies" tunelessly with mirth in their eyes. Harry was overjoyed to see Hermione cut loose and have some fun, despite all the terrible things that had happened in the last 6 months.

"See I was going to say the opposite!" Harry said, feeling the burn of the whiskey settle in his stomach. "She was a hell of a lot more graceful than me or you at the Yule Ball!" Harry said, making a spinning gesture with his hand that seemed to hold his attention more than it should have. He smiled at his rotating fingertip.

"Too right! I remember the look on Ron's face during the few dances that Padma managed to drag him onto the floor!" Fred chimed in, the bottle making its rounds again.

Ginny hadn't stopped staring intently at Harry since he had started making the spinning gesture with his hand, which he suddenly realized that he was still doing. He stopped and forced his hand to fall back to his side, though somehow it found itself draped around Hermione's shoulders. Harry wasn't drunk enough not to notice that Ginny was getting more and more agitated by the second, but he was drunk enough not to have a bleeding clue as to why.

"If only he had taken Lavender! Maybe we would have been introduced to Won Won a few years earlier!" Hermione sniped in. She cackled to herself as she leaned into Harry's side. Harry barked out laughing as well as the twins looked at them confused. The twins, of course, had graduated before the now famous Lavender and Ron relationship. Ginny, finding the distraction she needed, filled them in quickly, much to the consternation of the subject of their laughter.

She had just finished explaining the necklace that Lavender had given Ron when the twins could contain themselves no more and fell to the floor clutching their sides with laughter. Harry was incredibly sorry they hadn't been present for the original exchange. He was sure the jokes and teasing they would have doled out to Ron during those months would have made up for the other terrible things that had been going on during the school year. Harry and Hermione joined in on the infectious laughter but managed to keep their seats. They passed the bottle back and forth a few more times, taking increasingly smaller sips. Harry may never have drank such strong stuff before but he had been witness to many a time when his roommates had. He had no intention of 'praying to the porcelain god' as Seamus had called it. Hermione appeared to be of similar mind.

Ginny took the bottle after she was done regaling the twins with the antics of Lav-Lav and Won-Won. Ron for his part had his face buried in his hands desperately trying to block out the memories as Ginny related them. A few times he attempted to mumble some sort of argument for his actions, but they either weren't heard at all, or were completely ignored.

Fred wiped tears from the corners of his eyes as he regained his composure and sat back on the couch, his chest still hitching from his laughter. "Come now Ron, there has to be something embarrassing you can tell us about Ginny! I'm especially curious as to what she did with that love potion she bought from the shop before the school year started!"

"That's right!" George called from the floor as he too attempted to drag himself back up to the couch. "That must have been quite the spectacle! I always knew she had the pranking genes in her!" He said, though slightly muffled as his face was pressed against the pillows in a failed attempt to regain his seat.

Harry's back stiffened immediately and he could feel Hermione stiffen as well. There had been no grand prank last year. Not from Ginny anyways. The only display of love potion had been from Romilda Vane's attempt to snare Harry. No, there hadn't been any other incidents of the sort last year in the Griffindor house.

Ginny's face had gone pale. Harry could see that clearly, even in the flickering firelight. Her eyes were darting back and forth between himself and Hermione.

"What did we call those things George?" Fred asked, waiting for someone to tell them of what was sure to be a great prank.

"Lusty Leviathan Raging Love Potion! Sure to fan the flames of your crushes hidden desires!" George said, also looking around for who was going to speak first on what grand scheme his sister had used their invention for.

Harry on the other hand felt the effects of the alcohol leave him in a rush. The name of the potion was a bit too explanatory of the feeling of the 'monster' in his chest he had experienced the year before with Ginny. He had never told anyone that was the way he felt at the time, so there was no way that the twins could be having him on.

Harry was suddenly flooded with the memory of that night after the Quidditch match when he had kissed Ginny in the Gryffindor common room. He remembered the feelings well, the feeling of something roaring to life inside of him. He hadn't questioned the sudden feelings at the time because he hadn't wanted to. He had been so desperate to feel like everyone else, to have what everyone else seemed to have. To have something in his life that was normal. He had wanted those things so badly that he hadn't stopped to ask why.

Hermione placed a hand on his knee and he realized that he had been starting to stand. Harry could feel the blood pounding in his ears. A cold anger started to simmer in the pit of his stomach. "Fred, out of curiosity, what did Ginny say she was going to use that for?" Harry asked, his teeth clenched.

Everyone could sense the change of tone in the room. The jovial attitude that had been there a moment before seemed to burn away faster than the alcohol had disappeared from the bottle in the first place.

"Well she said she was going to play a prank on a Slytherin. Make him fall in love with Millicent Bulstrode or something hilarious," Fred said with a shrug. "Why?"

"Because that never happened. And other than Ron getting dosed by accident from Romilda Vane, the only other outrageous show of affection was when I kissed Ginny after the Quidditch game," Harry said, his stare drilling holes in the now pale and trembling redhead across from him.

Ron's eyes grew wider than saucers. "You don't mean…" he said, turning to face his sister. Her body language left no doubt as to the truth of the matter.

"Ginny, you didn't. Please tell me you didn't." George said, putting a hand on his forehead and leaning back.

"I knew you liked me! I just thought you were too shy to act on it so I thought it would help!" Ginny said, finally cracking under the combined glares of everyone else in the room.

"How long?" George asked. "That stuff wasn't very powerful and should have only lasted for a short period of time. It's just for pranks and jokes, nothing serious," he said, looking back and forth between the two sides of the room.

"Well, I thought something was wrong with it since the first couple of times I gave him some, nothing happened. So I mixed it with some of the Amorentia that we brewed in Slughorn's class…."

"YOU WHAT?!" Fred exploded. "That is a class 4 dangerous substance! You have no idea what that could do mixed with a gag potion from a joke shop! You could have poisoned him!" Fred shouted. "As it is, that long of an exposure to a love potion of any kind will have done completely wonky things to him overall. There are reasons why we experiment so much with some of the things from our can be really dangerous!" Fred scrubbed the heels of his hands into his eyes, presumably to rub the effects of the whisky away.

"How could you be so careless!? Or heartless!?" Hermione asked in disbelief. Harry hadn't spoken since Ginny admitted her actions. He hadn't even really formed a complete thought to be honest.

Harry finally found himself standing unimpeded by Hermione's hand. Ginny had started to cry and Ron was staring at her horrified. An entire year. An entire school year he hadn't been himself. And for what? A few weeks of kisses stolen behind statues. A few walks around the lake?

Ginny's tears didn't do anything to sooth Harry in the slightest. "Get out. I trusted you and you used me. Get out and don't come back," he said, not able to find any other words around how angry he was.

Hermione held on to his arm, standing next to him. He wasn't sure if she was holding on to him for support or to prevent him from doing anything further. Truthfully he was glad that she did. He had hardly ever been so angry in his life, and the last time he had, he had attempted to cast an unforgivable at Bellatrix Lestrange. A soft buzz started to fill the room around them. Small static arcs started to lance across the backs of Harry's hands. Hermione's hair began to frizz a bit more than usual just by being close to him.

The twins, seeing this, scooped up their sister between them. She was crying in earnest now, trying to get apologies out between her sobs. But Harry didn't care. He didn't listen.

"We'll take her home. We are so sorry Harry, we had no idea," Fred said, holding his sister up and walking out of the room. They would have to get outside the wards to apparate.

"We'll make this up to you somehow. I swear," George added, looking embarrassed. "I never would have thought she was capable of that."

"Maybe it's time to take those potions out of your store?" Hermione said, sinking back into the couch behind her, sounding tired and weak.

"Good call Hermione. Damn good call," George said before following his siblings out the door. Harry collapsed back down onto the couch. The maelstrom of magic that had started to swirl around him ended abruptly.

The fire crackled into the now silent room. The three of them sat in silence, trying to process what they had just discovered about the past year of their lives. It didn't effect Ron as much as it did Harry and Hermione, but it still added a new layer to the entire group dynamic. For their part, Harry and Hermione were both thinking the same thing. What would the last school year have been like if they hadn't been fighting nearly the entire time? What would have happened if they hadn't gotten so far apart so fast?

"I'm really sorry Harry. Maybe if I hadn't been so selfish all last year, I would have noticed something was wrong," Ron said tiredly.

"No, Ron, it wasn't your fault. No one 's over now." Harry choked back his fear and upset, trying not to make Ron choose between his best friend and his sister.

Ron nodded in appreciation. "I'm gonna head to bed then. See you in the morning."

He left. The silence stretched out a bit longer. "What would have happened to us if she hadn't done that? Would we have caught Draco in time? Would we have figured out who the half blood prince was?" Harry whispered in a small voice. He was feeling so shattered at the moment he didn't really want to know the answers to any of those questions.

"I don't know Harry. I really don't know," she said, leaning her head down on his shoulder.

"I just wanted to feel normal, and even that was taken away from me. Is there anyone in the world that doesn't just want to use me for something? A weapon? A fairy tale hero? Why can't I be just Harry?" he said, feeling the energy drain out of him. He slid to the side and found himself with his head in Hermione's lap softly crying. Whether it was from the alcohol or just the pent up emotions, he didn't know and didn't particularly care. He had spent so much time crying since Hermione had taken him from Privet Drive. For a moment Harry almost felt shame, but it was quickly washed away by the thoughts of all the things that were crushing down on him for so long.

There were so many people he missed. So many people that should have been with him when he turned seventeen. Family that he would have given anything to hear them say 'happy birthday' to him, even if for just one more time. Specters of the ones he had lost seemed to float through his thoughts and wouldn't let him find peace. At the end of the memories and the swirling darkness making his entire head spin, was a single face. Smiling at him, while a dragon roared to life inside his chest.

The dragon let out a mighty roar inside of him, this time a mournful one of pain.

Hermione stroked his hair and made soothing noises as he cried. She let the raven haired wizard cry himself right to sleep while she soothed him as best she could. "You'll always be my 'just Harry,'" she whispered to him as she too fell asleep on the couch next to the dying flames of the evening fire.


	7. Chapter 7: Vellichor

**Chapter 7: Vellichor:**

_The strange wistfulness of used bookshops._

* * *

**Thursday, August 1st 1997**

The next morning Harry woke to find himself curled up on the couch. During the night Hermione must have slumped over to her side and Harry had moved with her. He was now sleeping with his head on her stomach, her hands still resting protectively on the back of his head. He didn't want to move a single muscle. Harry felt like his head was resting on the most comfortable pillow he'd ever experienced. Despite the thunderstorm raging behind his eyebrows, a small smile crept over his face all the same.

That was when the memories started returning. Ginny crying, the twins' horrified expressions, Ron's sad drunken walk from the living room. His complete breakdown on Hermione. He winced. Then again, he thought, feeling the deep sting of Ginny's betrayal again as the memories came into a sharper focus, leaning on Hermione like that last night had felt like the right thing to do. He decided that he was going to let it be. Laying there, with his head resting on his best friend, his eyes fluttered closed and he felt something drain away inside of him. His guilt fled like a banished shadow.

Despite how horrible it felt to be used, he didn't blame Ginny for the things that had happened last year. She didn't kill Dumbledore. She didn't let the Death Eaters in. She did something selfish and it had spiraled into effecting other events, but she didn't do anything to maliciously hurt anyone.

And if Harry didn't blame Ginny after all that for the death of the Headmaster, then why should he blame himself? Was he that willing to hand out empathy to others but not himself? Hermione was here, promising to do this with him, to stand beside him. She didn't blame him for her house being destroyed. He did everything in his power that day to save their lives, but what if he had succeeded in pushing Hermione away because of his guilt for putting her in danger in the first place? All of them would have died that day.

No more. Ginny didn't kill the Headmaster. And Harry didn't curse Hermione in the Department of Mysteries. They had both behaved selfishly and made bad choices. With his head in Hermione's lap, feeling the passive support even from her sleeping form, Harry let out a shuddering breath of relief.

He only got to enjoy his situation for a few more minutes before he heard a noise in the hall. Under normal circumstances he would have moved or at least made some attempt at making the situation look a bit different than it currently did, but in his hungover state, he didn't bother much. When he saw the blurry form of a brown haired man come around the corner, he simply closed his eyes and hoped that somehow he wouldn't be noticed.

"Well that isn't what I expected to see first thing in the morning!" Dan said, not in an angry tone, but in one that was clearly meant to wake both of them up. Fortunately for him, and unfortunately for Harry, it worked.

Hermione shot up from the couch with a yelp, seeming confused as to where she was. Harry was dumped on the floor quite abruptly and between the shock of the landing, and her yelp, his head exploded in pain. Voldemort spending some quality time inside his head had prepared him for headaches, but this was more of a pulsating throb rather than a skull splitting sensation. Different, but not really. Hermione for her part had tried to stand up, experienced a similar sensation, and slumped back down on the couch when she realized it was only her father in the room and not someone attempting to attack them. Harry, not having been prepared to be on the floor so soon, simply laid face down, one arm thrown over the back of his head in protection, the other spread away from him haphazardly.

Dan started to chuckle as he squatted down next to Harry. "This your first hangover son?" Harry groaned back at the man, cursing him silently for clearly taking pleasure in Harry's pain. "I'll take that as a yes. Since I'm a such an understanding fellow, I'll leave that as your punishment for sleeping with my daughter," he said with a bit of a laugh. Harry cracked an eye open to see if he could gauge Hermione's reaction to that statement. She had turned beet red and was slumping over on the couch, arm thrown across her eyes as well.

"Daddy! It's not like that…oh never mind. Think what you want. My head hurts too much to care," she mumbled, waving her other hand a few times as if to dismiss the now laughing man.

"I would have thought better of you Hermione! I'm sure you did some research into the after effects of alcohol before doing something as crazy as to actually try something new!" her father said, feigning surprise. Hermione glared at him through the gap in her fingers, looking like there was a few other gestures she wanted to throw at the man.

It was then that Jane walked in the room. "Daniel, are you torturing the children?" she asked in a sing song voice, clearly knowing the answer and approving of his actions.

"Well I had to make an example of the boy. He slept with Hermione after all!" he said, far too cheery for this hour of the morning.

Jane started to laugh while Hermione turned another shade of red and buried her head completely in the couch cushions, hiding her face as much to hide her embarrassment as to cut out the sound. "Now now, no more lazing about. There is a lot to do today and you can't spend the entire day in bed together." They were having too much fun at the teenagers' expense at this point. "Kitchen in fifteen minutes for breakfast," Jane giggled, motioning to her husband to come help her.

A couple of resounding pops cracked through the room as the twins apparated into the room. They were looking perfectly chipper and Harry couldn't help but resent them for the fact that they weren't in the same kind of pain that he was.

"Ello Harry, figured the least we could do is drop some of this off." Fred tossed him a small vial containing a greenish potion. The vial bounced off of Harry's unmoving form on the floor and clattered to his side. "Sorry about that. I'm used to you being brilliant at catching things," Fred said, cracking a small smile.

"Look lively Hermione, got one for you too," added George. Another toss, and another soft thump as the vial landed somewhere in the couch pillows covering Hermione's head. Her hand snaked its way through the cushions to fish it out.

She mumbled something about loving magic and downed the potion without a second thought. Similar to the pepper up potion, a small amount of fog came out of her ears, but she immediately looked much better. "You going to be ok Harry?" Hermione asked as she headed towards the kitchen, presumably to get her coffee. Harry grunted a response that was enough of an affirmative not to slow down her pursuit.

Harry took her lead and downed the potion in a single swallow. It didn't have a pleasant taste, but potions seldom did. The effects were what mattered and they were almost immediate. He was hungry and somewhat emotionally drained, but his head didn't feel like a small thermonuclear explosion anymore. He smiled gratefully at the twins.

"Thanks guys. That is going to make the morning much easier to handle," Harry said, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Don't mention it mate. Like my good brother said, it's the least we could do, what with our own sister basically poisoning you for a year. Not sure how she could have been that selfish." George looked somewhere between disappointed and pensive. "We're going to be doing some research today on what happens when those two potions mix. You aren't supposed to mix potions on the fly, especially ones that have similar effects but varying degrees of potency," George explained, belying how much he had actually studied and learned at Hogwarts.

"Grants Rule of Magical Compounding." Hermione said from the doorway, coffee mug in hand and a book already tucked under her arm. "I'm going to be doing some reading up on it today. When you layer two potions together that have the same effect, but with different potency, the outcome usually is a wild exponential change in power of at least one aspect of the potion. This hangover potion for example is similar to the pepper up potion. If you mix the two, what is generally experienced is a severe fever nearly instantly. The side effect of steam coming out of your ears increases by a factor of ten or so. There is no telling what effect was compounded when she mixed those two potions. Unfortunately, Grants Rules aren't really discussed until NEWT level potions. I did read up on them a bit ahead because I was afraid that they would be on the OWLS, but that didn't pan out," Hermione rattled off, finally taking a breath and another sip of her coffee.

"Right scary you are sometimes Hermione," Fred said while George whistled softly. "That's a spot on explanation. Thankfully we have some of the potion Ginny purchased back at the store. We already took it off the shelves of course. Just took it to the back to test. We'll send you an owl when we know what the combination creates. It's going to take us a few days to brew some Amortentia though. It's a class four potion, and even though we have a permit for those kinds of things, we're going to have to fill out some paperwork to keep the Ministry off our backs about it," Fred said.

George nodded along with his brother's explanation. "You know dear brother, I'm getting quite sick of having to be so adult and responsible. Paperwork? Permits? What has become of us?" He threw a hand over his forehead in mock grief.

"You're right," Fred sighed. "After we're done I say we test some of the new pranks on the new store clerk and see if she finds them as hilarious as we do!" George pretended to worship his brothers feet in response.

"See you two later! Look for our owl!" Fred said, yanking his twin to his feet and disapparating a moment later.

"They would have done really well on the NEWTs you know," Hermione said, now leaning on the doorway slowly sipping from her coffee. She was still wearing the outfit from the night before, seeing as the two of them never had gotten a chance to change their clothes.

Harry slumped down into the wingback chair facing her. He was feeling much better, but there was a part of him that was still drained. "Thank you for helping me calm down last night..." Harry was about to apologize but he stopped himself. He was done feeling sorry for himself. "You always seem to know exactly how to help me."

"To be fair, I have been keeping you alive for..." she trailed off with a mock confused squint, "about 6 years now," she finished, smiling.

"I did save you that one time. You know, in the bathroom?" Harry mumbled.

"Would you like me to get a chalkboard so we can tally it out?" Hermione asked on the verge of laughter.

Harry smiled. "Thanks Hermione, really."

She smiled back at him. Then she looked to the side. "What Ginny did was unthinkable. I'm still angry because of how it effected our friendship, but that doesn't even come close to how you must feel. I wish I had noticed sooner…" Hermione started, but Harry held up a hand and shook his head.

"No, neither of us are going to start blaming ourselves for this. It hurts, but at the end of the day, who had feelings for who doesn't matter anymore. The world is a different place and schoolgirl crushes and love potions don't mean shit now. I'm mad, I feel betrayed, but...there are more important things," he said, hoping that reminding Hermione of her own words would calm her guilt.

"Thank you for trying to make me feel better Harry. But I still feel like I-" Hermione tried to clarify, but Harry interrupted her.

"Friendship," Harry blurted out. He had no idea what he was doing, but he felt like there was something he needed to say. "The kind that can't even be fucked up by a dangerous love potion."

He stood up. His revelation this morning seemed to have sparked something inside of him. He had spent so long taking the blame for things outside of his control that he forgot to thank the person who stuck by his side, even when he was completely ignoring half the times she had saved his life. Now he could see the tally board she had joked about as if it was right in front of him.

Hermione had gone silent. Her eyes were wide, not understanding where his sincerity was coming from. Harry didn't stop himself.

"Bravery. The kind where you take your friend's favorite broomstick to get checked for curses even though you knew he would be angry. The kind where you take someone backwards in time to save their last family member. The kind where you break into the most secret compound in the magical government even though you know it's a trap." Harry took a breath, realizing that he could go on forever.

"Love. The kind where you stand by someone even though you might die," Harry steadied himself and locked eyes with Hermione. "Where you never try to change the other person, you're just there for them...and you never abandon them," Harry said, allowing his words to just tumble.

"Please don't tell me there is something else you should have done for me. You have done more than I'll ever be able to thank you for."

Tears sparkled in Hermione's surprised gaze. "Harry, I..."

"Kids! I said fifteen minutes and I meant it!" Jane's voice floated out of the kitchen with Dan's laughter peppering the background.

Hermione just smiled a dazzling smile, reached out, and gave him a tight hug. Then she turned to head to the kitchen. "Mum, I told you! We're adults now!" her voice chimed in response to her mothers' commands.

"The hell you are!" Dan barked back. "Listen to your mother!" All four burst into peals of laughter.

The stage acted "Muuuuuuum," from Hermione while she pretended to stamp her feet into the kitchen had Harry smiling wide. He chuckled as he followed her to a pleasant hangover-free breakfast with the Granger family.

* * *

**Thursday August 1st, 1997**

Due to a quickly crunching time table, Harry and Hermione decided that they should go to Diagon Alley that afternoon. The wedding being on Saturday and then their training with Moody starting on Monday, they weren't entirely sure if they would have time for shopping after this coming weekend. There were no Order meetings scheduled due to the fact that a significant portion of the Order was going to be gathered for the wedding on Saturday, so they decided to take advantage of the free time while they had it.

A part of Harry felt bad for Bill and his bride-to-be. They had a huge wedding planned and it would have been beautiful. However, making a spectacle and a target of everyone attending right now was not something they wanted to do. At least instead of calling it off entirely, they had simply trimmed it down to mainly close family. The Order members were all going to be in attendance too, partly as guests and partly for security.

It was times like these that he wished Ron was around. Ron had a tendency to say some of the things that Harry was thinking, and then Harry would get to see the reaction out of people without being the focus of their ire or discomfort. He didn't particularly want to turn down the older man's company, but at the same time he would have liked if Ron had been there to complain about it a bit for him. Unfortunately he was called back to the Burrow early in the day. Molly had flooed saying that she needed him around the house since Ginny was 'ill'.

Ron didn't look enthused about the idea of going back to the Burrow so soon. Between the disagreement with his mother during the birthday party and now the fallout from Ginny's behavior, there was a lot going on back at home. After some food and a hangover potion, Ron looked much more up to the task of facing his mother. He had told Harry and Hermione to not worry about him and headed home shortly after breakfast.

The shopping trip of course was not their usual trip. They weren't there to buy their school supplies like usual, though going had the added benefit of making people think that they were. Potion ingredients for healing potions like the salve that Hermione had used on Harry's hand in fifth year did not come cheap or easy. They needed to visit a number of apothecaries and other potion supply stores to make sure that they were prepared in the case of injuries. Gringotts and Flourish and Blotts were both on the list as well. Harry needed to get some of his gold converted into cash and Hermione wasn't about to let an opportunity to visit a book store pass her up.

Harry loved being in the Alley. Seeing the stark difference between the wizarding world and the outside world was always engulfing. It helped him remember that there were multiple groups of people he was fighting for, and some of them wouldn't ever know he had done anything. In fact, for the non-magical, if they didn't know anything was different, then he had done well. Harry didn't want to think of the kind of havoc that the Death Eaters would launch on the world at large if they had free rein of Britain magical and mundane.

Lupin, Harry, and Hermione stepped out onto the bright streets of Diagon Alley and looked around, lowering the hoods of their cloaks. It had been easier to navigate through the crowded restaurant that served as a portal to the alley proper partially disguised. Not being stopped every few feet to have his hand shaken or some nonsense or other spouted at him from the Daily Prophet was a nice change of pace for Harry. Tom, of course, had recognized them but with a respectful nod had let them pass through without interruption. Now that they were in the Alley, though, allowing people to see them made more sense than trying to three of them walking around with their cloaks up in the middle of summer wasn't going to win any points for their reputations. Besides, being seen was half the reason they were here at all.

They managed to move through the alley without much resistance. A few wanted to shake Harry's hand or wish him and Hermione the best at Hogwarts this year, but they were few and far between. The overall feeling that permeated the crowds was not one that produced much social interaction. Most people kept their heads down and went about their business without noticing too much of what was going on around them. Voldemort was doing what he did was causing terror. By making an example of a few families that had been more outspoken, he had sent the message to everyone else what fate would await them if they tried the same.

The older generation was hunkering down and preparing for the worst again. They had lived through the Dark Lord's first reign of terror over magical England and were preparing to do the same again. The way Hermione had explained it made perfect sense. There were random bursts of violence, all using the Dark Mark as a calling card. The Ministry was blustering and posturing to prove that they were doing loads to help everyone and stop the 'minor threats'. Harry's mere existence had stopped the first war in its tracks. Now, with the Ministry making no mention of Harry or what had happened that Halloween night, it was putting the public off.

It was all far too reminiscent of the fear and loss that many experienced in the 1980's. The result? The public was hunkering down and hiding away, hoping to catch neither the ire of the Ministry who was lashing out at shadows to make themselves look good, nor the notice of the Dark Lord himself.

"I hate seeing things like this," Hermione mumbled. "It just doesn't feel right." Harry grasped her hand for a moment and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"We are going to do everything we can to fix it," he said, hoping he sounded more confident than he felt. Finding out that he had been revered as a hero his entire young life for something he didn't remember had been jarring. Feeling the crush of expectations on him from a population that expected him to do it again was terrifying. Yet, he tried to keep his chin up. Wallowing wasn't going to do anything other than get him and his friends killed in the end.

"Unfortunately, I'm with Hermione. This is exactly the way everyone behaved when he first tore around the country," Remus said, his emphasis making it clear which 'he' was being referenced. "I didn't even get to enjoy the afterparties last time. Celebrating didn't seem appropriate without James, Lily, Sirius, or even Peter to celebrate with." Seeing everyone behave this way of course brought out the worst memories for Remus. "Watching you wade into the middle of all this makes it worse. The only good thing to happen that night was that you survived, Harry. I still can't help but feel like tempting fate twice isn't a good idea."

"I agree with you, but is there another choice? Would me running away stop him? Hiding for the rest of my life? I don't think he would be likely to just forget about me because I wasn't in his face for once," Harry said with a grimace.

"No, there aren't a lot of other choices. He marked you, and whatever that means to the universe, or maybe just in his head, it doesn't much matter. He would scour this earth to find you because of how badly he fears what you might be able to do," Remus said, side stepping a hag selling medallions on a street corner. Harry was no expert, but he was sure that Dementors would have nothing to fear from the bent coin on the end of that chain.

They handled all of their potions needs without any conflict and quickly moved on to their more pressing stops. Stopping at Gringotts to move some gold out of his vault, which had filled even more on the advent of his majority, seemed like a prudent thing to do. Hermione did some quick calculations and had the Goblins convert a decent amount into muggle money as well.

"No sense in limiting our spending power to the galleons now is there?" she murmured to him, stuffing the wads of bills and coins into her never ending purse. Harry appreciated her foresight, but wasn't sure why they would need two hundred thousand pounds.

It had taken some convincing for Hermione to take his gold at all, but when she had seen the logic in the decision she had relented. Between the additions from his family vault, the Black accounts, and even a small stipend from Dumbledore, Harry was one of the most wealthy people in London. As it was he wasn't going to be able to spend all that money for as long as he lived, seeing as interest and dividends from some of his parents holdings would tide him over every year.

Rounding out the trip of course was Flourish and Blotts. Hermione made a point of going there every time she was in Diagon Alley. If they were being followed, she insisted, it would be noticed if she didn't. She nearly immediately disappeared into the stacks of books, pulling out a scrap of parchment from her pocket and running a finger down the spines as she was swallowed by the tomes.

In spite of himself, Harry had to smile. A bookstore was Hermione's natural environment and seeing her behave this way always made him more at ease with her somehow. They had both grown up somewhat lonely, but seeing her around the thing that gave her comfort brought out a side of her personality he loved. Also, if he was honest with himself, he liked bookstores quite a bit as well. There was something about a bookstore that had its own character to it. In the wizarding world, Harry had noticed that the books were hardly ever "new." Most times they were new to the store, but not newly printed. Hermione could always come in here and find something she hadn't noticed before. Sure the text books or school required reading tended to be on the newer side, but the gems of older magic, accounts from different parts of the world, or recordings of historic events from a different person's point of view…well those were things that moved in and out of the bookstore in a fluid motion. Hermione had a knack for finding the rarer ones and knowing seemingly by sight or smell which ones she should take with her.

Remus settled himself on a stool near the door and pretended to be just glancing around casually. In reality, he was watching everyone in the store for any perfidious activity. There were few others that could make such a good companion in this regard. Remus's sight and smell were at a base level somewhat enhanced from his monthly transformations. This allowed him to notice things faster than most other members of the group, even Tonks, who was a very skilled Auror in her own right.

Harry followed Hermione into the stacks, absently dragging a finger across the spines as he passed.

He came up behind the brunette who was muttering to herself about "titles that were for more show than use."

"Find what you were looking for Hermione?" Harry said quietly, trying to softly interrupt her revere.

Despite the softness in his tone, she still jumped slightly. "Harry there is no reason to sneak up on me!" she scolded in a whisper as if they were in a library. Her respect for books knew no bounds.

"Sorry sorry. Just curious as to what you were looking for. You seemed to be on a mission."

"Yes well, as much as I trust Fred and George, I also like doing my own research. I want to find out as much about Amortentia as I can." Harry grimaced. The topic while not as upsetting as it had been last night or this morning, was still not his favorite thing to talk about.

"Maybe we should just drop it?" Harry said, trying to sound like it wasn't too important to him. "I mean, it's over and done with now."

She placed a hand on his arm. "I know this is uncomfortable for you, and slightly painful, but we have to know if you need to go through some sort of detox or something. We have to be in our best form over the next couple of months if we are going to actually accomplish our…goals," she said, her voice dropping lower as she spoke. "I'm worried about you and it will make me feel better to do a bit of research on my own about it. Can you allow me that?" she asked imploringly, but not forcefully.

Harry looked into her eyes and saw how genuine she was being. Rather than steamrolling ahead and just doing the logical thing, she was taking a moment to ask him first. Hermione was normally so headstrong about when something was "correct" versus "incorrect". This time, though, she paused to make sure she didn't trample on his feelings about the matter. Harry appreciated it more than he could convey.

"I suppose that's fine. If it will calm your mind about it, then I would be a jerk to stop you," he said after a minute of reflection in her gaze.

"Thank you Harry," She leaned over and gave him a light kiss on the cheek. Harry didn't pull away and felt himself rather enjoy the sensation. She smiled and patted his cheek "For being sweet," she said. The only other time Hermione had given him a kiss on the cheek had been on the platform after fourth year. At the time he had been too young to recognize the swooping sensation that he felt now.

Finding themselves back at the Keep without much to keep them occupied, Hermione did what she did best. She pulled out some books and started to read. Not really knowing what else to do with his time, Harry followed suit and started attempting to do some research on historic locations. Hermione suggested he extend his search into non-magical texts as well. While there wasn't much of a chance of the Dark Lord wanting to store his soul in something and then leave it in a muggle location, there was the chance that a magical location would be obscure enough to be forgotten by the magical world but become somewhat of a curiosity to the non-magical world. Stories like Bigfoot, Loch Ness and the like were all examples of the non-magical world noticing enough hints.

Muggle repelling charms and the like only worked to a certain point. No matter how many wards and charms you put on something, if someone looked hard enough, they would be able to see past it. Hermione, with the help of Remus, explained the phenomenon in detail.

Remus began, "you see, charms and wards don't alter reality of course. For instance, just because Hermione's parents would look at Hogwarts and see nothing but a broken down pile of rubble doesn't mean that the castle itself isn't there. The charms and wards just block certain sensory transactions in the brain or confuse them in some way. While they can scramble those sensory messages for a time, at some point, given enough evidence, the brain will override what it is receiving from the senses and the ward breaks," Remus said, getting understanding nods from Hermione. Harry understood what the man was saying for the most part, but there was a part of him that still didn't get it.

"That's why people like Bill have such steady jobs. Breaking those kinds of curses and wards without tripping them is tough. Tough to do without anyone getting hurt that is." Hermione added after Lupin was done speaking.

Harry felt like he understood a bit more. It explained a lot of the inconsistencies in the magical world with how charms and things worked. The past few days he had found himself much more interested in learning more about the magic and its inner workings. Listening to Hermione and Remus explain things made Harry more and more aware of the reason why there were seven years of schooling required before going out into the adult world. Magic had mysteries that could take a lifetime to understand. The intertwining functions of nature and magic seemed to provide a near perfect balance at times and other times seemed to work at odds with one another. It was part of what made magic so…well magical. Harry grew in his appreciation of Hermione and Remus's understanding of it all.

Harry wasn't too sad that Ginny never turned up again at the Keep. He wasn't sure which Weasley family members knew of her transgression outside the ones that had been there the night before. Harry was upset about what had happened and he felt violated, but he wasn't willing to tear apart a family over it. Hopefully the twins would have some favorable information for him soon and the entire situation would drop. Getting the elder Weasleys involved would only make the entire situation more awkward, not to mention the hellfire that Molly would rain down on the twins for allowing Ginny to purchase something like that.

Harry turned a page softly, stealing a glance at the girl sitting in the room with him. She was reading, as usual, but Harry didn't think he would have noticed if she had been doing anything different. No matter what he did, his eyes seemed to settle back on her face. He couldn't stop himself from watching her features change as she chewed through another section, brow furrowing in thought.

More and more his thoughts were turning to his best friend and 'feelings'. Cho had been a crush, nothing more, but Ginny he had thought he had real feelings for. If his only experience with "having feelings for" someone was born under the duress of a love potion, did he really even know what that felt like at all? The romantic interests in his life were limited, and Ginny had been the first one that he had really had the gumption to act on. That rush of passion had been hard to ignore in the moment, and now he knew it hadn't even come from him at all.

With all of those past feelings cleared away, Harry stared at Hermione, again trying to keep it hidden. 'Having feelings' seemed like an awfully strange phrase. He had tons of feelings for people.

_"Feelings...what specific feelings?"_ Harry had to ask himself.

She made him feel excited. She made him feel like laughing. She made him feel brave. She made him feel confident. She made him feel strong. She made him feel safe.

He wanted her to feel happy. He wanted her to feel strong. He wanted her to feel accomplished. He wanted her to feel appreciated. He wanted her to feel cared for. He wanted her to feel safe.

He wanted her to feel loved.

A mental whiplash cracked through Harry's mind.

_"That's not it though is it? You're not being honest with yourself. Try again."_

He wanted her to _be_ happy. He wanted her to _be_ strong. He wanted her to _succeed_. He wanted to _appreciate_ her. He wanted to _care_ for her. He wanted her to _be_ safe.

The feelings weren't general or in some cosmic sense. He wanted her to be those things, right now, in this moment, with him. They weren't things he hoped would happen. They were things he was going to make sure would happen. As this reality sunk into all the crevices of his mind he was overwhelmed with fire and passion. It wasn't like a dragon roaring to life and trying to battle its way out of him. Last year it had been a yearning to reach out and take something for himself. A shred of normalcy. He had **wanted** something.

This was no dragon. This was a phoenix flaring to life inside of him. It didn't want to take anything. It had only one mission, one meaning.

_I will protect_

Like a guardian spirit it spread its wings and let loose a phoenix song of challenge. Harry's skin tingled with realization and absolute clarity.

He had been trying so hard last year to feel ordinary.

But the fact was.

_"That wasn't enough. That wasn't what you wanted."_

What he had been trying so hard to find...

Was pretty damn _extra_ ordinary.

He didn't just want her to feel loved.

He wanted to be the one to love her.

* * *

**Thursday August 1st, 1997**

Blood dripped down the wall from the mangled remnants of the appendage that had been fired there from across the room. The self stylized dark lord sat across the room seething at his followers. The more loyal and well versed of his henchmen had been wise to stay toward the back of the room and allow the newer members to grovel closer to the demigod they served. While they had no reason to think they would be singled out during one of his bouts of 'discipline', anyone who wasn't at least afraid of being caught in the crossfire was at best a fool and at worst...well at worst they were probably a touch insane.

Bellatrix lounged at the front of the room as close to Voldemort as possible. If she could have been hugging the hem of his robes, she would have been. She alternated between glaring at the minions kneeling in front of her master and gazing adoringly at him with a look somewhere between lust and awe. It was no secret that she was the most devoted of the followers, although it wasn't really spoken out loud since no one wanted to be caught admitting there was a limit to their devotion. For a master Legilimens such as Lord Voldemort though, admitting it wasn't exactly necessary.

"M-m-Master, we didn't realize they were among the crowds until it was too late for us to reveal ourselves," Crabbe Jr stuttered from the floor. Clutching what remained of his hand close to his chest. The Daily Prophet article was pinned to the wall with the bones of his index finger. The smiling faces of what appeared to be a young couple walking through the side streets of Diagon Alley shifted on the front of the page. The finger bones holding it to the wall speared the young mans face right through his forehead, leaving a small trail of blood to flow down his features.

"As you have...pointed out," a sick smile crept onto Voldemort's snake-like visage. "They were there for hours and seen by plenty. It has been a well known instruction to bring Potter to me, but the mudblood bitch could have been a good reminder of what my followers are supposed to be capable of. It's clear that I have been too lax with punishments as of late." The dark lord spun his wand through his fingers giving the barest of nods to Bellatrix.

With a malicious jab of a crooked black wand a snapping yellow beam burst forth and struck the yet-untouched one of the two teenagers kneeling before her. Goyle's screams echoed around the chamber causing his father to wince along the far wall, the rest of the Death Eaters keeping trained faces devoid of any such reactions. Still clutching the bloody flap of skin that used to cover his finger bones, Vincent watched his friend get tortured endlessly.

"Gregory...your son has disappointed me yet again. It would appear that without Draco to guide him, he is utterly useless. How...unfortunate for your family."

This time the Dark Lord flicked his own wand almost lazily at the still screaming young man. His stomach ripped open from side to side with a jagged ripping sound. Goyle's father let out a cry of surprise at seeing his son cleaved open. Voldemort responded with a sneer and a wave of his hand that sent the father flipping through the room to slam into the far wall with a crack.

It was clear that the spell had not been anything so clean as a cutting curse that had torn the skin apart. As Goyle's intestines and lifeblood spilled out onto the dungeon floor in front of him, he screamed and desperately tried to scoop them back into himself. Failing miserably as the warm slick entrails spilled through his shaking hands. The boy screamed and struggled for a minute before he fell silent and slid to the floor among the now freed portions of his insides. The squelching sound of him hitting the floor seemed to echo around the large chamber like a gong.

"You see, I hate to be disappointed. But I am also merciful, yes Vincent?" The silent still-breathing servant nodded fervently. His eyes remained on the corpse of his former classmate. "I will give you another chance to redeem yourself. You will return to Hogwarts and you will bring me the mudblood. Her screams will remind Potter of who he is defying. Don't disappoint me." The final words were said in barely above a whisper and yet every single person in the room heard them loud and clear.


	8. Chapter 8: Flashover

A/N:

Hi all! Again thank you for the wonderful feedback! You all have been too kind. This is a longer chapter as promised. I hope you all enjoy it, this was one of the most fun chapters I got to write.

This is redundant, but I don't care. Editing was again done by my wife who sacrificed a number of hours of her free time to help me with this. She helped directly with one of the descriptions as her own words. I would love to know if anyone could even pick out which one it is. If anyone can find it, I'll post it in the notes in the next chapter :)

As always, Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or anything else from the original works. They all belong to JK Rowling and I make no money off of these drabbles.

**Chapter 8 Flashover**

**The moment a conversation becomes real and alive, which occurs when a spark of trust shorts out the delicate circuits you keep insulated under layers of irony, momentarily grounding the static emotional charge you've built up through decades of friction with the world.**

* * *

**Friday, August 2nd, 1997  
**

The day before the wedding started with the same normalcy as any of the other mornings in the Keep. Harry found that the quieter pace of life worked well for him. The hustle and bustle of the Burrow had always seemed like a whirlwind that whipped Harry into its folds while he was there, but not necessarily something he was "part" of. The Weasley family had its own pace that they set for everyone who got close. Harry wasn't looking forward to giving up the early morning breakfasts with Hermione and her parents. There was something comforting about starting a day like that. It was something he hadn't ever really experienced before.

In addition to the peace and quiet, the morning gave Harry time to reflect on his thoughts from the day before. The quiet afternoon and evening that had followed the trip to Diagon Alley had been a godsend. Harry's mind had buzzed for hours after that moment in the library, the realizations scattering through his mind over and over again. Hermione hadn't noticed him observing her throughout the evening so his epiphany remained hidden for the time being. Which was all the better since he had no idea how to tell her any of his feelings yet.

This morning was no exception. Hermione sat in her chair with a cup of coffee in one hand and a book in the other. Her hair hadn't gone through its morning taming and as such was sticking out in every direction from a wild ponytail that barely contained it. She put the cup down on the table and absently held her hand over the top, moving her finger in a circle motion stirring the contents with a nudge of wandless magic.

As Dan was fixing himself a cup of tea across the room, the hair tie that was holding Hermione's hair back gave way. Her hair fanned out, some falling in front of her face. Harry was sure the only reason she noticed at all was that it was obscuring her view of the book in front of her. She let go of the book, fished the broken hairband from somewhere in her tangles, and used both her hands to tie her hair back into place with a quickly fetched new one from her pocket. The book hovered in place and Harry almost laughed out loud when he realized that she hadn't stopped reading during the entire process. Only Hermione Granger would invent a spell to hold a book with no hands.

Dan finally sat down across from them. "So fancy with your magical floating books," he muttered, pointedly stirring his tea with a spoon, and his hands. "I suppose it's good you couldn't do that when you were younger. You really would never have put them down."

Hermione let the book settle down onto the table after marking her place with the broken hair tie, as folding one of the corners would be a sacrilege. She reached the plate in the middle of the table, took a biscotti, and dipped it into her coffee, smiling at her father. "Good morning to you too Daddy. I'm not going to have my usual time to research tomorrow due to helping out at the Burrow for the wedding. So I needed to make up for lost time," she explained, then took a crunching bite.

"Well you'll be pleased to know that your excursion yesterday seemed to have the desired effect," Dan said, smirking as he handed her the morning edition of the Prophet. The cover story featured a half-page sized picture of Harry and Hermione walking into the bookstore. For a second, Harry was sure that the next picture would be of the soft kiss on the cheek, but thankfully it didn't appear as if the photographer had followed them in that far. That would have seemed like a worse invasion of privacy than normal.

Hermione took the paper from her father and scanned the page while absently dipping the cookie into her coffee again. She made a few noncommittal noises as she scanned the article that accompanied the picture of them. "They aren't quite going as far as they did in our fourth year, so you can stop staring at me like that Harry," she said, not taking her eyes off the page. "Rita didn't write this article. I imagine she's furious about it but too scared I would come after her again to say anything."

Dan quirked an eyebrow. "I'm afraid to ask what that means. You threatened someone?" he asked, looking at his daughter askance.

"Not threatened," Harry chimed in. "She held her captive in a glass jar in our dorm room for a while after we found her sneaking into the castle." Harry was so interested in the newspaper Hermione was sliding to him that he didn't notice how flippantly he had just spoken.

"So let me get this straight. You caught someone in the castle when they weren't supposed to be there, and instead of turning her in to the authorities or a teacher, you kept her captive in a glass jar in your dorm room?!"

"Well, she was spying on Harry and writing those terrible articles about him. I figured out that she could transform into a beetle. That was how she was sneaking around," Hermione said, trying to fill in the story while Harry read the paper.

"So she could go anywhere in the castle like that?" Dan asked, very concerned. "Even the bathrooms?"

"I suppose so." Hermione paused to think about it. "I hadn't thought of that before. Hmm. Well, in any case, when I caught her I trapped her in a glass jar and kept her there until the tournament was over so she couldn't write any more vile things about Harry."

"So, just to clarify, after learning all that, you didn't tell anyone about it. Just trapped her in a jar. All to stop people from saying mean things about Harry in the newspaper?" Dan asked finally, his eyes darting back and forth between them.

"Yes?" Hermione said, wincing under the glare from her father. "It sounds a lot worse when I say all this out loud."

"I would be mad … if I wasn't so impressed," Dan said, smiling into his cup despite his surprise. "Controlling the narrative by using the media is a common tactic for rising dictators. The more they discredit the press, the easier it is to fool the masses. I think Mark Twain said 'It is much easier to fool someone than to convince them they have been fooled.' If they have been abusing the media like that for that long...well I can't see any problem with putting someone in a jar." He thought for a second, "Huh, it does sound worse when you say it out loud." Dan's words did put the newspaper into a new perspective. What would Voldemort do if he had access to television?

Jane strode into the room freshly showered and prepared for the day. "Hermione may have been quiet, but even she had a breaking point as a child. You don't remember the times I had to pick her up from school because some other girl's backpack would burst into flames when Hermione was around. We didn't know what it was then, but we do now," Jane said while fixing her own cup of tea and joining them at the table.

To her credit, Hermione had the decency to blush. "Well, they were being mean to me and the other kids in the book club. They earned it. Besides, the flames never burned them. Just their bags." Her chin rose slightly in defiance.

Harry smiled and rested a hand on her shoulder. "I'm honored that you are willing to kidnap wayward journalists for me and keep them in jars in your bedroom. It makes me feel very taken care of," Harry said, trying to keep a straight face while he said it. Truthfully he was only half-joking. It did make him feel taken care of.

"Shut it you. If it wasn't for my flagrant disregard for laws and rules when you are involved, you would be dead a hundred times over by now." Her tone was stern, but she was smiling at him the entire time.

"This," Harry said, taking a pointed sip of his tea, "is incredibly true. I'm so grateful we turned you into a criminal!" This earned him a smack in the arm.

"Well, now that we have discussed what a hardened criminal I am, I'm going to take a shower. And even though this is a new shampoo, I'm not even going to read the instructions once before I use it!" Hermione said, walking from the room head held high.

"Liar!" Harry and Dan both yelled after her.

A frustrated "Gah!" was all they heard over their laughter.

* * *

The afternoon bled into evening faster than Harry expected. The two of them had spent the majority of the day reading and spitballing ideas back and forth. They had enjoyed a nice relaxing lunch in the backyard before lounging around and enjoying each other's company. Harry even convinced Hermione to play a game of chess with him. Which he promptly lost, much to his own chagrin.

Harry sat at the table leaning his chair back slightly and balancing on two legs. Hermione blew a wayward hair out of her face as she read and he wobbled a few times as he snickered at Hermione. Her eyes still skimming back and forth rapidly across the pages of the books in front of her when she looked up to narrow her eyes slightly at him.

"I don't have to remind you why I'm doing this right?" she stuck her tongue out at him.

"Shit I am tired," Harry said as he leaned forward and slapped the chair back to the ground. He would have been worried about the sound, but he and Hermione had put up some silencing charms on the room so people wouldn't hear what they were discussing. Harry had seen some of the sideways glances they had gotten from some of the other people in the Keep, but so far there hadn't been any comments about the two of them spending so much time alone. Harry tried not to let himself get distracted by that while they were doing such important work.

Hermione gave him a look. "Really? You just wanted to say 'Feces I am tired'?" she smiled and rolled her eyes.

Harry blinked a few times before bursting out with a laugh. "If that is the direction your mind just went, I think you are as tired as I am."

They had been using the library into the late hours of the night and it was starting to get to them. There were only so many hours you could spend poring over book after book, even if Hermione always said she was fine. Harry appreciated that she was willing to keep up the search, but he was trying to slow her down enough that she didn't burn herself out. They were just getting started, and they had a long way to go until this war was over.

The firelight flickered from the other side of the room. Hermione looked into the flames and her face fell into a wistful expression. "Maybe you're right. I just feel like we are missing something like it's right in front of us and we are just looking right past it." She closed the book softly.

"We've made a lot of progress, Hermione. We're pretty confident he is egotistical enough to want to hide it somewhere it could be found. The first couple has all been hidden somewhere tied to him. If he truly wanted to hide it somewhere it could never be found, then he would have made one a rock and thrown it in the ocean, right?" Harry said, running a hand through his hair. He was happy he got her nose out of a book anyways.

"Well, yes and no," Hermione started, tapping the tip of her nose with a finger a few times in thought. "Yes, he does seem to want to hide them where they could be found. And that could be simply from how arrogant he is. But also he had to return to Albania for some reason after he attacked you the first time. We know that he didn't leave Albania until he found Quirrel. The only reason I can think for him going to Albania at all was to return to a hidden Horcrux."

"So you're saying that you think he has to return to the physical item to be able to use it?" Harry asked, leaning in a bit. He hadn't been clear on this theory earlier.

"I think so. But you are spot on about him wanting to put them where they could be seen so to speak. He wants to hold it over people's heads that he hid something right in front of them," Hermione said, groaning and leaning back into the cushions. "I don't know Harry. We are trying to recreate a backstory about a dark wizard so we can track down where he hid his trinkets fifty years ago. All we have is conjecture!" She was appropriately frustrated.

"I don't know either Hermione. Are we overthinking this?" Harry asked softly.

"My best idea right now is that he would pick magical locations that non-magicals still visit. I think that would appeal to his sense of superiority," Hermione posited.

Harry thought about it for a moment. "Maybe something that's like an urban legend? Like Loch Ness or something like that?" Harry asked.

"Hm, maybe. I wonder if we can check some different books and cross-reference to different locations for magical and non-magical folklore." The two of them went back and forth. They did this most nights. It had been very beneficial for planning and preparing for the tasks ahead of them.

The flickering light and the quiet that had descended for the moment had Harry back to thinking about the things he had realized the day before. He was somehow falling in love with his best friend. It would cheapen it to say that he had a crush on her or was "interested" in her. Of course, he was interested in her! She was the most fascinating person he knew. A crush seemed to be so...simplistic a way to describe what he was feeling. She knew him so well, saw him for who he was. To call it a crush would be an insult to the depth of their friendship.

The question was if he should tell her. The old Harry would have stamped his foot and adamantly opposed the idea. He would have spent countless hours listing off to himself all the reasons why she was better off without him and how he was going to die anyway. Those thoughts didn't hold much sway on him anymore. The solemnity of Hermione's promise to him made it easy to crush those demons down. Even his most cowardly subconscious voice couldn't insult Hermione's integrity enough to question her promise.

She was coming with him. Ron had also promised to support him, but it was different from Hermione. Ron was very important to him, but Harry knew that he could most likely continue the mission if Ron stayed behind. The same could NOT be said for Hermione. They would either win together, or they would lose together. Having finally accepted these feelings in himself, Harry realized that it was wrong of him to have thought that he could leave Hermione behind. He cared so much about her. Asking her to stay behind while he fought this battle would hurt her so incredibly badly that Harry would have regretted it forever.

With those excuses aside, now the only reason for his hesitation was his concern that she might not feel the same way. This had been the question on his mind all day. Harry didn't think that he would be able to keep this from her for very long. Hermione knew all his tells for when he was lying. For a moment he wondered how Ron would feel about all this, and he was ashamed to realize how fast he disregarded that fact. It wasn't that he didn't care what Ron thought or how Ron felt because he did. But there was something so genuine about this realization about Hermione that he wasn't willing to loosen his grip on it. If there was a problem, then he and Ron could discuss it like adults.

A soft knock sounded at the door to the library. Harry absently waved his hand and sound started to permeate the room again. Hermione glanced at him and opened her mouth to speak before Fred stuck his head inside the door. Much to the surprise of both Harry and Hermione.

"Clever trick Hermione! You can hear out, but we couldn't hear in! We had good news so we wanted to come over right away. We ended up not having to brew our own Amortentia so we were able to get right to testing." Fred said, smiling as he walked in. Hermione gave them a flat stare. She had stood when they came into the room and had more or less assumed her fighting stance. Her legs were planted just about shoulder-width apart, and her hands, balled into fists, were resting firmly on her hips. The stance was so stereotypical that on anyone else it would just look comical. Hermione Granger, however, when she assumed this stance, with that furrow between her eyes, just looked dangerous.

George caught sight of Hermione and blanched. She simply raised a single eyebrow to him and waited.

George cleared his throat. "Err...I, uh, we, want to start with an apology to both of you. We made those potions up as a joke for people to say something stupid and embarrass themselves. We never thought it would be used like this. That's our fault. We should have been more responsible. I hope you can…er… forgive us."

"It's ok guys, I know you didn't ever intend for something like this to happen," Harry said, stepping forward and placing a hand on Hermione's shoulder. Hermione had loosened her stance a little bit.

"Fred," Hermione nodded to him. "George," another nod. "Let me make myself clear. "I read more about love potions in some books I bought the other day. In theory, they are dangerously close to an imperious! They take away someone's free will. I hope I never have to read into a subject more morally bankrupt as love potions. If anything else in that store harms Harry in any way, you will have to answer to me." Her tone left absolutely no room for arguments.

Fred was quiet for a few moments as a serious look crossed over his face. "Even in a joke bottle, messing with someone's free will like that is wrong. And we shouldn't have ever put something on the shelves that even hinted that was an ok thing to do," Fred inserted solemnly. "It will not happen again."

The fact that the twins hadn't spoken in sync told Harry that Hermione's threats had indeed hit their mark.

"We can't let ourselves become the monsters, even by accident or by passive support. We are going to take that responsibility more seriously now," George said with the same seriousness as his brother.

Hermione's face loosened some. "Thank you, I forgive you. I appreciate that you understand how serious that issue is, especially to a female. It's terrifying actually," Hermione said, shivering.

George looked absolutely distraught by her words. He finally gathered the courage to begin speaking. "So the basic love potion from our shop wouldn't have had any real effect on anyone older than about...fifteen. But when Ginny mixed it, I'm afraid there were some quite bad effects. Asphodel has a bad habit of turning Amortentia into nearly a date rape drug." Hermione's face turned sheet white and Harry understood George's trepidation. "It dims out your magical abilities like you wouldn't believe. Harry, the fact that you could cast at all is astonishing," George finished, running a hand through his hair.

"George isn't kidding. He was more or less a puddle for about an hour when I gave him the smallest bit of the mix. He raved for a bit about the mop in the corner and then he just kind of passed out for a while. With the length of time you had it in your system, there is a chance that some of that was a built-up resistance. That being said, you will still seriously have been impacted by the potion itself," Fred said.

He stepped closer to Harry and further away from Hermione, looking like he was looking for a distraction. "The other thing that we found when George took some of the potions was that I basically couldn't cast. I mean, I guess I could if I had really tried, but I couldn't focus on a single thing. My mind was so muddled that I couldn't even raise my wand really."

"Which means that since you still have been casting fine for over a year... you might notice some differences in your magic," George picked up.

"Like I don't know, maybe stopping a house from crushing you?" Fred said in a flat tone of voice. He wasn't making a joke.

"Do me a favor Harry," Fred said as he pulled out his wand and transfigured a bit of parchment into a pushpin. "See that map on the wall over there? Can you stick this pin into London?" he asked and put the pin down on the table.

Harry was pretty confused. He glanced at Hermione who shrugged at him and nodded for him to continue. He looked over at the wall and made note of where London was. He flicked his fingers in the air and the pin went sailing end over end across the room to stick perfectly into the center of London.

"Harry…" Hermione stepped forward with a cautious look on her face. "Why didn't you use your wand?"

He thought about it. Small things didn't seem like he should need a wand. Now that he was of age he just stopped really thinking about it. He had seen Dumbledore do simple charms and such without his wand.

"I don't know, I mean you didn't use a wand this morning when you stirred your coffee, I saw you twirling your finger," Harry said, shrugging.

Hermione sighed and closed her eyes. "That is a charmed coffee mug that Mr. Weasley found for me. When you put in the spoon it stirs itself. I wasn't doing anything, the same thing with the book Harry," she opened her eyes. "How long have you been doing those kinds of things?"

"I stopped thinking about it after my birthday since it didn't seem like a huge deal," Harry said honestly while everyone stared at him.

Hermione sat down. She smiled at the twins. "This is just like the parseltongue thing in second year. Harry doesn't even realize the things he can do aren't ordinary so he just keeps doing them until someone notices."

"Let's try something else," George said, getting in on the experiment. He shoved a stack of crumpled parchment across the table to Harry. "Transfigure this into anything you like."

Harry didn't like being a test subject right now, but he understood the necessity of finding out more.

He placed his hand over the stack and thought about what he would make. Harry glanced at Hermione to see what her reaction to all of this was. She smiled at him and nudged a pin across the table which he covered with his hand. When he pulled his hand away, a small otter and stag were running around the table. Hermione smiled a thousand-watt smile.

"Those are our Patronuses!" Hermione said, clapping her hands together in excitement.

"You didn't think I remembered?" Harry laughed.

"Harry, that's mental!" Fred exclaimed. "Here, let me show you." He grabbed another pushpin and flicked his finger at it the same way Harry had a minute before. It fell over on its side and made to roll off the table before Harry stuck his hand out and moved it back to the middle of the table wandlessly.

"I don't think we have to mention how useful that could be. You should really practice more without your wand. The only other person I ever knew who could do that was Dumbledore," George said.

Hermione was writing something down in a notebook. "I already have a few ideas of things we can test. We just need a control group..." She chewed her lip in thought, completely engrossed in the notes she was taking.

"Smashing. Unfortunately, we have some bad news to leave you with," George said, he turned to Fred for support but Fred just looked sadly away. "The more research we did into this, the more we had to ask Ginny for more information. She said that she did a similar thing to you, but targeted at Ron. Hermione...I...I don't know what to say. I don't even begin to know how to make this right." George's eyes were wet.

Hermione's face had been distracted just a moment before, but now was a landscape of fear. Her soft features pulled into hard lines and Harry could see how much emotional turmoil she was in.

"I didn't want to believe it," Hermione shook her head and a few tears broke loose of the corners of her eyes and fell to the floor. "Why wasn't it worse?" She said, barely choking out the question.

"We assume for the same reason Harry could. But we don't know a way of testing it," Fred stepped up and placed a hand on George's shoulder. "I'm so sorry Hermione, this will never happen again."

Hermione didn't say anything more, she just nodded.

The pair of redheads recognized the dismissal and Harry nodded to each of them as they retreated from the room.

Harry wasn't sure if that was his cue to leave as well. Hermione looked lost in thought. Her arms were crossed around herself and she was looking down at the floor intently. Her posture was of someone trying to shield themselves from a cold they couldn't shake. "Hermione, if you want to be left alone for a while, I understand," he said softly, gathering a few of the books he had been reading to take to his room.

"No, Harry, please stay." She turned to the table and put a hand down on top of the book he was about to take. "You're the only one who understands what I'm feeling right now." She looked up at him, her eyes pleading him to sit back down.

"Then I stay," Harry said softly.

"For a moment there I thought this was like always. Something bad happened to you, I do some research and we find a way out of it. I read some books and find a way to protect you, to help you. That's the way things always go. But now…." Hermione trailed off. She took up her arms crossed posture again, seeming to shrink down within herself.

"Now I get to protect you too." He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around the slight girl. "No matter what happens during this war, no matter what we have to do. I will always be by your side I swear." She buried her face in his shoulder and started to softly cry as a response. For the second time that week, they held on to each other while one of them cried for the loss they had suffered.

As Harry held Hermione and whispered words of comfort the best he could he noticed something strange happening. A soft golden glow was emanating off his hands, and he could feel a tingling sensation where her hands were on his back. The color reminded him of the extra golden layer the dome had when he had held up the house. It brushed against the edge of his curiosity, but it wasn't enough to take his attention away from the woman in his arms.

* * *

**Saturday, August 3rd, 1997  
**

Harry and Hermione apparated to the designated spot outside the Burrow. They unclasped hands as they regained their composure. Holding hands wasn't necessary, but between the uncomfortable feeling of apparition itself and the precision required not to trip any of the Weasley's protective wards they had set up, it made them feel better to do so. Harry scanned the area around them. He could see the rolling landscape that surrounded the small town of Ottery St. Catchpole. Most of the time he had used floo powder to go directly into the house, but with the security being tightened before the wedding, the floo was not being used at the moment.

Harry glanced down the small dirt road to where he knew the Burrow was. He couldn't see it at the moment, but he knew it was there. If he had been anyone else, he would never have known an entire family lived anywhere in the vicinity, much less an old wizarding family that had been there for generations. He gave Hermione a small encouraging smile and started walking. She followed his lead. They were both fairly uncomfortable with what they knew they were walking into. Facing Ginny for the first time since the truth had come out was not something they were looking forward to.

Neither of them had put their dress robes on yet. The wedding wasn't later in the evening. Fleur and Bill had wanted the wedding to be in the twilight. Fleur had explained it as "a moment where light and dark meet. Appropriate non?" Hermione had loved the symbolism.

Despite recent disagreements, Harry and Hermione still wanted to be there to support the family. And Ron had asked them to come to save him from the nightmare wedding prep.

They walked along the lane without speaking. Before the reached the threshold Hermione reached out and took hold of his hand again, giving it a gentle squeeze. It was just to remind him that she was there with him and that they would do this together.

"Pretending as nothing happened is going to be a bitch," Hermione said candidly. Harry didn't comment on her swearing. He thought it was cute when she swore.

"You're telling me. I'm not sure how I'm going to be able to look at her without showing anything on my face," Harry said, squeezing her hand back before letting go. "I hope she has enough sense not to try to dance with me," he muttered, grinding his teeth at the thought.

"Maybe you'll just have to spend all your time dancing with me?" Hermione asked, batting her eyelashes exaggeratedly, a wry smile on her face. Hermione was putting on a brave face and despite it sounding like a joke, even Harry could catch the meaning there.

_"I don't want to be alone tonight."_

Harry grinned. "I don't think your poor feet would survive that for long!" He tried to play it cool, but he felt his internal temperature rise.

"Nonsense! I'm a witch, and you, sir, are hardly the first wizard who was pants at dancing." The conversation had provided a pleasant distraction from the looming house that appeared as they cross the wards.

Ron greeted them in the yard. That is to say, he greeted them from a lawn chair that, from the look of it, he had conjured himself. The chair had four legs of all different lengths, and Harry was fairly sure the reason he was lounging in it that way was that it was about to fall over. The lanky man waved lazily at them with a smile.

"Oy! About time you got here! Mum is making me de-gnome the garden, and it is back-breaking work I tell you!" To punctuate his lament, he flicked his wand at the nearby shrubs and a small gnome floated out by its ankle. Another flick and the creature spun around a half a dozen times, cursing him all the while in a squeaky voice, before being launched over the far garden wall as if shot out of a cannon.

Harry couldn't help but laugh at the sight. Hermione glowered at them both in turn. "Ronald, that is just plain cruel!" she said, taking on her special I'm-going-to-argue-with-Ron tone.

"Oh hush Hermione. Would you rather run around and chase them yourself? Would you rather throw each one with your hands? That's the alternative. One way or another the little bastards are getting launched," Ron said, flinging another offender over the wall.

Hermione didn't quite know what to say to that, but she was spared the moment of speechlessness by Molly stepping out the front door. She whacked Ron on the head with a wooden spoon as she passed him. "Language Ronald," she snapped. "Harry! Hermione! I'm so glad you agreed to come and help. I wish I could do it all myself, but what needs to be done needs to be done!" she said, taking them by surprise with a hug. Harry felt confused, this wasn't the Molly that he had seen on his birthday.

She pulled away for a moment. "You both look wonderful. I'm sorry for what I said the other night on your birthday. You are all adults, but it doesn't change how much I want to keep all of you safe. I wish I could make this all go away and send you back to Hogwarts. But Ronald was right," she heaved a sigh. "You," she looked at Hermione, "would follow Harry anywhere, and Ron would as well. I'm sorry I said that it was a waste, it's actually the bravest thing I've ever heard and I'm proud of all three of you."

Harry was moved by her words to the core. "Thank you, Mrs. Weasley. I don't know if I can tell you how much it means to hear you say that," Harry said sincerely.

"Same for me Mrs. Weasley," Hermione said with a smile.

"Molly, dears. Call me Molly." She patted their cheeks and whisked them inside to get them working.

"Hermione, do you mind helping me in the kitchen? Since Ginny still isn't feeling well I'm short a pair of hands," Molly explained.

"Of course." Hermione looked relieved that Ginny was not waiting on the other side of the door. Just before Hermione and Molly disappeared inside, Molly called back at them.

"I don't care how little sleep you all got last night, I expect the tents and chairs done in an hour!"

The last hours of the afternoon seemed to pass by fairly quickly in the backyard. The friendly jabs of brothers working together kept the work from feeling too onerous. Harry found himself distracted and enjoying himself despite his earlier trepidation about being at the Burrow at all.

Soon enough it was time for them to get dressed. The sounds of clamor and confusion coming from the kitchen area had long since stopped, suggesting that the women had adjourned to the upper floors to do the same. Harry knew just as well as the others that the girls were going to take much more time getting ready than they were. The boys all slipped upstairs and between the one bathroom and a few cleaning charms, they were ready in under an hour. Harry was amazed that: Ron, Bill, Charlie, Fred, George, Arthur, and Harry all were able to make it work in the small house.

Even though the wedding had been toned down significantly from its original grandeur, the backyard still looked like something out of a storybook. Harry couldn't believe that this was what they considered "small". The tent reminded Harry of something from a carnival; tall, peaked, and brightly colored. Similar to the effect of the Great Hall at Hogwarts, there was a perpetual fall of flower petals floating down from the ceiling. If you looked closely enough you could see the branches of the trees that stood outside crossing over the top of the tent, their shadows cast on to the fabric from the fading light of the afternoon. The culminating effect was that the group of witches and wizards were sitting in an enchanted forest glen.

The approaching twilight cast a soft warmth around them of the sun's last glow. They were lucky- it hadn't decided to rain this afternoon, so it was barely humid at all, providing a comfortable summer feeling to the air. The dimming sunlight welcomed in floating candles around the edges of the awning. Harry saw Arthur tuck a wand back into his dress robes nodding appreciatively at the candles that were now floating brightly. Soft music played from beside the small altar that was set at the front of the room, a waist-high harp majestically playing itself there.

Harry noted on his watch that the wedding was still a few minutes away from starting. Hermione was likely finishing up getting ready after having worked for so long in the kitchen, but he really wished she was here already.

He felt a nudge. It was subtle, but something inside of him seemed to miss a beat. Just barely noticeable. A tingle. A touch of a spark, enough for the hair on his arms to move just slightly.

Harry's head turned on a swivel, his eyes trained exactly on the entrance where Hermione stepped through.

She was beautiful. A deep emerald dress was wrapped around her. The bodice was only hanging from one of her shoulders, leaving the other bare. Her hair was swept up into a fancy pleated pattern on top of her head and a few bangs hung down to frame her face. The dress swooped down from her left shoulder and across herself, not terribly low cut, but enough to show some cleavage. Her eyes sparkled with amusement as she locked eyes with Harry and seemed to glide over to him to sit down.

"Harry, remember to breathe." Dan had leaned backward and was beaming at his daughter. Even the soft whisper from the older man surprised Harry out of his enchantment with the brunette next to him.

"You look ama... You look beautiful Hermione," Harry breathed softly to her.

"Thank you, Harry. You don't look so bad yourself," she said, lacing an arm through his. The harp changed tunes and began to play something that sounded to Harry as a wedding march, but somehow unique at the same time. The bridal parties came out as expected and once everyone was lined up, the harp again changed tune and everyone turned to face the back of the tented area, waiting for the bride-to-be.

Fleur and her father came into view and she was every bit as stunning as Harry had imagined she would be.

She wore a white silk dress that highlighted her natural beauty by its perfect simplicity. The fall of the silk flattered every subtle curve of her lean figure. Its only ornamentation were two golden fleur-de-lis clasps that gathered the fluid material at each shoulder. Bill looked completely enchanted by the sight of his soon-to-be wife walking towards him. Harry didn't see Bill's eyes waver from her face for a single second. She floated down the aisle to him with the grace that Harry remembered from the Yule Ball, took her place facing Bill, and the wedding began.

Harry was very aware of Hermione's presence next to him. Her hair seemed to catch the light of the floating candles in a way that made it shimmer back and forth with the flickering flames. Her eyes shone with reflections of the lights but also from the pricks of tears that formed as she watched the couple exchange vows. He was watching the ceremony of course, but his eyes couldn't stop drifting back to Hermione.

As the couple recited their vows, magic swirled in the air around them as the minister waved his wand in a figure-eight pattern around their hands. It settled down gently onto their joined hands and lit like a glowing beacon.

For an unknown reason at the last moment, Harry and Hermione's eyes met as the minister finally said: "I now declare you, bonded for life." The crowd around them cheered and clapped, but Harry and Hermione didn't seem able to move their gaze from one another until the crowd started to move and they were swept away into the group.

Now that the formal part of the ceremony was over, more enchanted instruments came forth and started to play lively music. The chairs were banished to the sides of the garden and more candles took to the air around them, illuminating the area in much more detail than before. The tent where the chairs had been a moment before had been transformed into a dance floor.

Chatter started fairly quickly and soon there was an exciting buzz to the back yard as Molly started levitating food out and conjuring table cloths for the long tables that they had set up earlier. Soon the entire area that had just been a twilight glade was a bright and lively dance area filled with food, drinks, and laughter.

"The ceremony was so nice," Hermione said to him, still standing next to him near the periphery of the group. Harry hadn't decided how he wanted to break into the crowd yet.

"It's the first one I've seen. I've not much to compare it to. But Bill looked very happy," Harry said, following the newlyweds with his eyes. He was glad that the first wedding he had seen was a magical one. There was something visceral in seeing the bonds of magic link their hands together. The imagery and meaning behind it were not lost on him at all.

"Hopefully you'll get to see many more."

"Maybe," Harry said, imagining her for a moment in a white dress. He fumbled his words for a second and Harry threw caution to the wind. "Care for a dance?" he blurted. "I'm not ready to brave the crowd near the food table."

Hermione looked surprised at his request coming so suddenly, but not displeased. She reached out and touched his forehead. "Are you sure you aren't feeling ill? You want to dance!?" Hermione said as he tugged her onto the dance floor. Harry summoned all his memory of the dance lessons with McGonagall from before the Yule Ball as he took hesitant steps leading Hermione through the basic slow dance.

"You know I'm sorry that I didn't ask you to the Yule Ball. I was really dumb back then," Harry said, smiling at his partner as they twirled around and through the other couples on the floor.

"Well, you are making up for it now," she replied, smiling into his shoulder and giggling.

"You looked beautiful that night," Harry said more confidently than he felt. "And you look even more beautiful tonight. I hope you know that," Harry finished softly. He thought about all the feelings that he had examined earlier. He wanted her to feel beautiful.

She pulled her head back a little to meet his eye as if to see if he was being serious. He met the gaze head-on. "Thank you, Harry," she said breathlessly.

_He wanted her to feel loved._

"Hermione, can I ..." Harry started before he was interrupted.

"As cozy as you two look, mind if I cut in for a dance with my enchanting daughter?" Dan asked, smiling, and waggling his eyebrows at the pun.

"Absolutely," Harry said, transferring Hermione's hand to her father's. She held her gaze on Harry for a moment, her eyes desperate to hear what he was about to say. But thought better of it and smiled at her father as they spun away with an amount of ease that only came from a father knowing his daughter. Harry glanced around. It had seemed while he was dancing with Hermione that they had been in a private world, unknown to everyone around them. Now Harry saw with some surprise that quite a few people had been obviously watching them dance.

He caught a few whispered voices mentioning his name and Hermione's as well. Harry felt like he needed just a minute of a breather after having Hermione in his arms for so long. Not wanting to break into the conversation at the drink table, he turned into the soft glow of the Burrow's kitchen door. He let go of the breath that he hadn't known he was holding as he closed the back door behind him and entered the kitchen. Hermione was with her father, he just wanted a drink and would be back before she noticed he was gone.

The thoughts from earlier still clouded Harry's mind while he mindlessly watched the pots and pans clean themselves in the sink. Distractedly, Harry found a mug in a cabinet and made himself some tea. Funneling some water from his wand into the cup he dropped the tea bags into the water and walked over to the table. By the time he had sat down, he had already heated the cup to his preferred temperature with the hand he was holding the mug without really thinking about it.

No sooner had he sat down with the cup the door swung open and Harry was torn from his thoughts as Ginny stepped into the soft light of the kitchen. They locked eyes and Harry could feel the anger inside of him come to life. He opened his mouth to tell her how much he didn't want to talk to her, but she beat him to the punch. "Please just hear me out, Harry. Can't you give me that?" she said pleadingly.

After thinking about it for a long moment, Harry nodded his head. Hermione's terror-stricken face. The visceral violation written in her eyes. It was all Harry could see when he looked at Ginny.

"I'm sorry that I didn't think before doing what I did last year. I thought it was what you wanted. I thought I was what you wanted," she said, moving closer to him but not sitting down. "Hermione helped me figure out ways to get you to notice me, but when that didn't work, I figured it was because you were too shy," Ginny said calmly, it was fairly obvious that her 'sickness' from earlier in the day had been a ruse.

"That doesn't make me feel much better about it Ginny," Harry said cooly.

"I know. After what happened in my first year, with the diary, I thought that you coming to rescue me meant something. I thought having experienced You-Know-Who in our heads before would be something we could share. Ever since then there has been this little voice in the back of my head telling me to keep trying because I was sure it was what you wanted," Ginny said, trying to get him to understand where she was coming from.

"If that was the case, why did you drug Hermione?" Harry said his tone cold.

"Because my brother is an arse and I could tell Hermione liked him. I didn't count on him being such a moron with Lavender," she said, turning away blushing. "I was just trying to make sure no one got their feelings hurt. We could have all been happy like that."

"You can't keep deciding things like that for people Ginny! Taking away someone's free will is disgusting!" Harry said sharply, sick of hearing her talk about casually controlling and manipulating people.

"I just didn't want you to throw everything away Harry," Ginny said, reaching out and attempting to put a hand on his knee, ignoring his tone completely.

Harry jerked away. "Excuse me?" Harry growled.

"You are going to need someone that can support you after the war. You didn't grow up in the Wizarding world. There is going to be a lot for you to learn after this is all over," Ginny said with a smile.

"Harry, you have to understand. You are the Chosen One right now, but when you win, it's going to be so much more. And you are going to have responsibilities and things and I didn't want you to waste it," Ginny finished her eyes seeming to slide all over him at once.

"And what does that have to do with Hermione?" Harry said in a flat quiet voice that could have frozen a boiling teakettle.

She sighed. "Hermione wouldn't be a suitable partner for the Head of House Potter," she said with a small smile as if he should understand that completely.

Harry was flabbergasted. He had been willing to accept a lapse in judgment or a childish mistake. This was different. "You think that because I'm a celebrity, and I might have a position of power someday, that I need a 'suitable' partner on my arm?" Ginny didn't seem to be hearing what he was saying. She clearly thought that he was agreeing with her. "And that _you_ were the one that should decide those things?"

Harry ground his teeth. "If any of that was something I wanted even the slightest bit, I would be LUCKY to have Hermione," Harry said, his voice coming in shallow angry breaths.

"Harry don't take it personally! Hermione really is wonderful, she is just different from us," she almost simpered at him. "She's a muggle-born Harry. It wouldn't be right. I can show you how the magical world works and show you how to manage a proper pureblood family. I can see now that the potion was the wrong way to go about it. You'll need me, Harry, for when this is all over. You're the Chosen One after all."

Harry slowly rose to his feet.

"It was for the best," Ginny said matter of factly.

"Having Hermione by my side is always what is best for me," Harry said so plainly and so matter of factly that he might as well have been saying "water is wet."

"It won't look right if you don't have the right kind of woman with you," Ginny said, her eyes flashing darkly in the well-lit room.

"I loved every moment of having Hermione on my arm tonight. If that is something I have to trade for 'fame' then sign me up!" He raged back at her. He lost his grip on his temper, self-control flung out the window. "Certainly better than having someone as selfish, shallow, manipulative, and hateful as you!"

"You would throw all that power and glory away just to have her in your life?" Ginny asked scathingly again, her eyes flashing with a darkness that he hadn't seen before. Her anger was at a new extreme.

"I would throw every galleon of mine into the ocean. I would burn my Firebolt. I would snap my wand. I would give up magic forever before I chose to not have Hermione Granger in my life. She is worth more than all those things combined. There is nothing you could say in the entire world, magical or not, that I would choose over Hermione," Harry said, his voice cold like ice and passionate like wildfire at the same time. "Nothing."

"You are a stupid man Harry Potter. I would give you anything," her hand traced down the curves of her dress, "that you want, and be able to help you achieve whatever you want. And you would rather have a boring. Plain. Ugly. Annoying. Know-it-all bookworm?" Her voice was venom. Her eyes flashed with suggestions and anger all at once.

"No, I would rather have my fascinating, beautiful, brilliant, best friend by my side. Stay away from me, and stay away from Hermione. Wherever we are, you aren't welcome." Harry stood up and slammed the door behind him so hard he thought the top floors would finally fall off the house.

Hermione was standing right outside the door.

"Hermione," Harry gasped. "How much of that did you hear?"

She was quiet for a minute. Her bottom lip sucked between her teeth as she stared at the ground. She looked forlorn and lost for a moment. Ginny's words had cut right to a lot of her nagging insecurities.

Finally, she let her bottom lip free and snapped her head up. "Do you really think I'm beautiful?"

Harry froze. Not the question he expected after Ginny's statements. "I think you are the most beautiful woman here Hermione," Harry said with plain honesty in his voice.

Her eyes locked with his and they both stopped moving. For a second in time, the flickers of the candles seemed to stop. The music started to fade and the cacophony of voices in the background reduced to a buzz. The two of them stood stock-still. It could have been for a moment, it could have been for a week, Harry couldn't tell the difference.

"C'mon Hermione, I think I owe you another dance?" Harry said, extending his hand. "I want everyone to see how lucky I am to dance with someone as gorgeous as you."

"I'd love that Harry," she said softly as she took his hand and allowed herself to be led to the dance floor. Harry made a point to make eye contact with the people he had heard whispering earlier. Let them talk all they wanted. He didn't care anymore.

Harry guided her to him and started to sway as if it was the most natural thing in the world. The entire night had his head in a buzz. Hermione standing in the archway. Holding her as they spun. Fury at Ginny. Hermione's face when he told her she was beautiful.

After a song spent swaying in silence Hermione spoke. "Harry?" Hermione whispered into his shoulder while they swayed back and forth to the music.

"Yeah?"

"Is that how people feel about me? When I'm not around. Am I really a chore?" she asked, her face down on his shoulder and tucked into his neck. The pose would have seemed intimate if Hermione hadn't sounded so sad when she spoke.

_I know how I feel._

He had an idea.

"I think I can better show you then tell you," Harry said. "Let's take a walk."

Her brow furrowed but she nodded and they slipped through the crowd and walked to the orchards that were just outside the Burrow but not outside the wards. The wind whistled quietly through the branches of the trees surrounding them. The orchards weren't large, but they were big enough for them to be out of sight from the rest of the wedding.

The leaves fluttered and scraped against one another, creating the familiar sound of a summer night. "I can't speak for others Hermione, but I can show you how you make me feel."

Harry took her hand in his and smiled at her. He wasn't thinking anymore, he was just going on instinct. Letting the emotions of the moment guide him. Raising his free hand, he let his fingers spread slowly. "Expecto Patronum," Harry said clearly. He didn't yell or force the spell, he just let the feelings that he had been finding in himself be the focus of the spell. The hand still locked with Hermione's started to glow golden for a moment before a pale gold and silver Patronus jumped from his outstretched hand.

But Prongs did not come out.

Instead leaped into the air a giant Phoenix. It flipped and spiraled through the air, turning gracefully on its side while it curved and flashed. Snow white motes of stardust rained down from its tail feathers as a glorious song began. It wasn't loud or booming. It was a soft melody that floated from the etherial firebird seemingly just for Harry and Hermione. The swirls and eddies of magical aura faded slowly as the Phoenix glided gently down to Hermione's shoulder. Leaning its head down and gently touching her cheek before vanishing in a subtle fall of twilight dust.

Hermione was speechless with her mouth hanging half-open. She was so shocked by what had just happened that her usual inquisitive nature was put on hold- but just for just a moment. "It changed...what memory was that..." she finally breathed just above a whisper.

"No memory. I just thought of all the things I feel when I think about you." Harry almost wanted to stutter into more explanations but stopped himself.

Hermione's eyes opened wider still. Harry soldiered on.

"Ever since my birthday I've been thinking a lot about you. And I realized that there were a lot of things I feel about you, Hermione." Harry stumbled a bit, trying to figure out what he was trying to say.

She didn't move. She didn't speak. She just stared at him in shock. He almost thought he had crossed a line, "Hermione I'm sor-"

She cut him off with a finger on his lips as she closed her eyes and shook her head slowly. After a second she smiled and opened her eyes to meet his directly. Without breaking eye contact with him, she raised her hand and whispered "Expecto Patronum." Golden light swirled around their connected hands, a small pulse flashing where they joined.

No otter made an appearance in the soft moonlight. Instead, a gold hippogriff glided gracefully from her hand. Wings outstretched, it arced gracefully above them. For a moment the night sky shone brightly through the astral image of the Patronus. The beautiful creature seemingly made of stars floated down to them and bowed slightly before disappearing into motes of dust.

"Did you know that the Hippogriff is the Greek symbol of love? Which makes sense, since I think that was when I started to fall in love with you," Hermione said, so softly that it barely carried through the wind. Their hands were still connected and there was a soft golden glow still hovering around them. Harry wasn't in the mood to question magic at the moment, but it wasn't lost on him that the glowing from their hands looked very similar to the display they had seen during the ceremony. He didn't think too much about it though as he was completely lost in Hermione's expression.

"I don't know when it started, but I know what it is now," Harry said more confidently than he had ever said something in his entire life. "I think I've been in love with you for a long time and just didn't see it until-"

He didn't get to finish the sentence as that was when her lips pressed into his silencing whatever he was going to say next.

Harry felt warmth shoot through him, filling him completely as something clicked into place inside of him. Something settled in a way that he couldn't explain. It was a feeling of acceptance and peace that he had never known before. Her lips were soft against his and Harry slowly brought his arms around her in whatever felt natural. Her arms were circled protectively around his neck to the point where they nearly clung to one another.

She made a soft sound against his lips and slowly pulled away.

"If that is how you feel, then I don't really care what anyone else thinks," Hermione said with a small smile.

"Well, like a wise woman once told me, there are more important things."

She smiled, this time with happy tears pooling at the corners of her eyes. Hermione placed a hand on his chest. The place where she put her hand was warm. Feelings of contentment and happiness spread from her hand and a soft golden light pulsed away from the point of contact. They both stared in wonder as it pulsed a few times, and then seemed to fade away. They shared a smile that seemed to stop time, all the while a soft glowing golden light seemed to pulse away from them. Neither of them cared enough to question it as their lips met again in the pale moonlight.


	9. Chapter 9: Jouska

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Thank you again for all your kind reviews! This chapter is a little shorter than the previous one, but we are getting to see some things moving forward! The section my wife wrote for the previous chapter was the description of the wedding dress. She did 100% better than I would have done with it. She again provided all the feed back for this chapter and was generous with her time to help me.
> 
> I am sure you are wondering where the "dark themes" warning comes in since we have been working through some fluff. All I'll say is give me a little more time, we will get there ;)
> 
> Disclaimer: As usual, I own nothing.
> 
> Read and enjoy!

**Chapter 9 Jouska**

_A hypothetical conversation that you compulsively play out in your head._

* * *

**Sunday, August 4th, 1997**

A soft knock came on the door. "Just a second!" Harry called out as he rolled over and snagged a shirt off the pile on the floor. For someone that had spent so long cleaning up after the Dursleys, he was terrible about doing it for himself. Despite the ability to do most of his tidying up by magic now, he still hadn't even taken the time to do that.

Finding a plain black shirt and pulling it over his shoulders he called back out that he was decent and Hermione stepped into the room.

"Oh, I didn't realize you were still sleeping!" she said, taking a look at him just now sitting on the edge of his bed.

"No no, I was up, I just hadn't decided to get out of bed yet. It is Sunday after all." Harry smiled as he stretched out his arms.

"I suppose getting the last bit of sleeping in for a while is alright. Tomorrow Moody is going to be making our mornings very tough," Hermione said, sitting down on the side of the bed next to him. Color started to rise around her neck and Harry realized that he was alone in his bedroom with Hermione.

"Thank you for making the wedding last night so memorable for me. I don't think I've ever been that happy in my entire life," Hermione said looking in his eyes.

"It was really special for me too," Harry said sliding a little closer to Hermione. An unknown force seemed to inch Hermione closer as well until they were incredibly close.

"Harry," Hermione breathed quietly. "Have you brushed your teeth this morning?" She smiled and started to laugh hysterically.

Harry started swearing up a storm, his face completely red now. After he muttered the breath-freshening charm a few times he looked up only to find Hermione sitting on his desk chair across the room. She was still giggling behind her hand. They made eye contact and they both burst into laughter again. It felt so good to laugh with her like this.

"Well," She breathed finally after the laughs had subsided. "I did want to talk to you about a few things from last night." Harry gave her a look and she waved her hand dismissively. "Nothing like that silly. Hear me out. My thoughts were pretty...distracted at the time, but do you have any idea why our Patronuses did that last night?" she asked, her inquisitive self shining through.

"I'm not sure. I know that they can change when people have an emotional change in their life. I think Tonk's Patronus changed when he was refusing to admit his feelings for Tonks and Tonk's was upset about it," Harry responded trying to think of anything that might explain it.

"Let's think about it for a bit and see if there is anything we can remember doing differently," Hermione said, satisfied that they had a plan for tackling the problem.

A small silence fell between them with neither of them sure what to say. Harry took a deep breath. "I suppose it isn't worth mentioning that you are now a bigger target than you were before? If he finds out?" Harry asked, knowing her answer.

"It isn't worth mentioning because I don't care." The finality in Hermione's voice brooked no argument about it. Harry nodded. It's not like this was something he wanted to talk her out of anymore.

"To me, the wandless part was more of a surprise than the change in form. About the Patronuses, I mean." Harry held his hand out in front of him and inspected it from all sides. "I mean I didn't think about it. I just knew what I wanted to do and I made it happen. Was it the same for you?"

A smile broke across her face. "No, I learned from you! When we were down by the lake and you saved all of us with your Patronus, you said that the reason you knew you could do it was because you had already done it. So I figured, if you could do it, it was possible, and therefore I could do it,"

"That was so conceptual that I almost don't understand what you said," Harry said with a laugh.

"Monkey See, Monkey Do."

"Ah, I get it now," Harry said while crossing his eyes and pretending to be thick.

Harry shifted his feet a bit. There was another topic that was burning in his mind that he had wanted to ask Hermione about. He got the overwhelming sense that there were expectations about new relationships and he was just...not interested in that kind of thing. He wanted to show Hermione how much he cared, but he wanted to do it authentically, something that honored their friendship rather than reduce it to short-lived romantic gestures. Harry wanted to be with her, really with her. They had more to learn about one another, but he didn't want to go backward and forget how their friendship worked.

"I'll be honest Hermione, I have no idea what I'm doing. The only time I 'dated' someone, I was under the influence of a potion. I don't even know where to start with this," he made a motion between them. "All I know about relationships is watching the stuff at Hogwarts, and that all seems pretty childish to me," Harry said, running a hand through his hair.

"Oh, that's because it is childish. Do you really want to fight over if you bought me flowers or not? Or do you want to get jealous if I was helping another boy with his homework?" She made a simpering sound while she said it. Hermione had a clear opinion on the way she felt about these things.

Harry blanched. "I think you have saved my life enough times for me to trust you enough to help someone else with their homework," Harry said shrewdly.

"Exactly. I promised you that I would be with you until the end. I think we are far past petty arguments and breaches of trust don't you think?" she smiled, fairly confident in his answer. "On top of that, we don't have time to waste on such nonsense. We don't even know how much time we have left," Hermione said, trying, and failing, to say it with a laugh. She cast her eyes down sadly at the floor.

There was a moment of silence in the room. Neither of them was sure how to fill it. How do you discuss the excitement of a new relationship while remaining realistic about how much longer you might live?

"It was always you Hermione. Even if we were going back to Hogwarts and everything was going to be just another normal school year. It still would have only been you. I'm not sitting here casting one last line out before I die you know?"

Hermione smiled, "I know that, but it is nice to hear you say it."

"I love you, Hermione. And I'm not saying that because I'm afraid to be alone before I might die. If I do die, I want to have spent as much time as possible with you," Harry smiled.

She nodded, her lips pursed into a small smile. "You are getting better at finding sweet things to say when you are confused."

"I love you too Harry. Just so you know, I want to get to the other side. I want to win so I can show you what living a real-life is like. So I can share with you all the simple things that you haven't even gotten to know. We might both be having to look death in the face every day during this war, but know that I always have my sights on the next thing too. And the next thing is getting to spend a Voldemort-free life with you," Hermione said with a dead-serious sweetness in her eyes that brought a tear to Harry's own.

Unlike last night, this time Harry took a step across the room and finished the conversation by covering her lips with his. He had no idea what he was doing, but Hermione didn't seem to mind.

A noise from downstairs reminded Harry and Hermione that they weren't alone in the house. Hermione seemed to be caught by surprise more than Harry and she hopped away from him quickly. Harry had to mask a smile. He knew that she wasn't embarrassed to be with him. Hermione was far from that insecure. It took a second for Harry's brain to catch up and realize that he would have had to explain himself if Dan Granger had found them like this.

"Do you want to tell people? I understand if you want to keep a secret for safety and stuff," Harry asked, not sure what the protocol here was. Harry didn't think anyone had seen them at the wedding, so if they wanted it to remain private for now, they could.

"I don't care who knows it. He might take everything else, but he won't take this from me. Certainly not because I was scared," Hermione said dangerously. "I was scared for a second because I wasn't sure how you felt about it, sorry for giving the wrong impression," Hermione blushed. Harry understood, it was a weird transition they were going through but her confidence inspired him.

Harry and Hermione returned downstairs sometime later after doing more research. The subjects they had been researching had been more...interesting than usual. They found Remus, Tonks, and Hermione's parents sitting in the living room chatting amicably. The second Hermione's foot hit the landing at the bottom of the stairs both Tonks and Jane started to laugh hysterically. Dan looked conflicted and Remus looked confused.

"Err...good morning?" Harry said, confused as to what was so funny.

Tonks was still smacking her thigh and snickering and Jane was leaned back in her lounge chair chuckling to herself when Dan finally spoke. "You two look well this morning. Have a good lie in Harry?"

Harry's senses peaked. Dan's tone made it clear that there was a right answer and a wrong one. "Yes?" Despite Harry's absolute best effort, it still came out as a question.

Tonks piped up. "Yeah, Hermione did you have a good lie-in with Harry?" she put a hand over her mouth in feigned concern. "Oops, I meant did you have a good lie-in like Harry. Silly me."

Dan shot a glare across the room at Tonks.

Ah yes, it seems that Harry had picked the wrong answer.

"Uh well, that's not...well I wasn't...rather we weren't, you know..." Harry fumbled every single word that came out of his mouth.

"Yes, we did. I would be glad to tell you more about it if you are interested? Harry's quidditch muscles are quite something and he is turning out to be an excellent kisser-"

"Stop! That's enough thank you! You win." Dan held up a hand in surrender smiling and chuckling. "I'm happy for you guys. It's been pretty obvious to all of us how you felt about each other," the father said almost proudly. Approval was a strange feeling for Harry.

"Thank you, Daddy," Hermione smiled at her father while Harry just stood there like a moron. "Mum, why are you laughing? Also, wait, how did you all know before we said anything?" It seemed like Harry's brain wasn't the only one moving slowly this morning.

"Hermione, you have a giant love bite on your neck."

Harry suppressed the grin. He had gotten a little adventurous.

"Ah, well. Yes...right," Hermione mumbled, then seemed to change her mind. "Well, I liked it. So all of you can think whatever you like about it."

Remus smiled. "I wish Lily was here to give you a proper lecture Harry." Remus laughed. "James and Lilly would have loved you, Hermione. What I wouldn't give to watch their reaction to this moment."

"Thank you Professor Lupin. That means a lot," Hermione said softly.

"Ugh, I'm not your professor Hermione. And also, I'm sick of losing bets." He flipped a coin through the air and Jane caught it smoothly.

"Don't know what I'm going to spend this on these days, but winning does feel good," Jane said, laughing again.

"Harry, I'm very sick of people betting on things we do."

"Yes, I'm not a fan."

"It's rude right?"

"So rude."

"Breakfast?"

"Sounds lovely."

They continued to pretend to shun the adults in the living room while they chuckled with laughter. The couple held back their laughs long enough to get to the kitchen where they had a wonderful time making a simple breakfast for themselves.

Harry and Hermione were taking a break from preparing and giving themselves a little fresh air. Breathing in something that wasn't thick with the smell of books and dust was refreshing for Harry's senses. Hermione, of course, didn't feel the same.

Her nose wiggled cutely as she tried to wrap her sense of smell around the outdoor air. "You know, I think I have allergies." She sneezed.

"Bless you," Harry said politely while he smiled at her expression of annoyance. For some reason, seeing Hermione annoyed by the outdoors amused him to no end.

"It's not so bad out here. I did need a break from books," Harry said amicably.

"I know that. The only reason I am out here inhaling who knows what is because you asked so nicely," Hermione said back.

There was a brief silence that was only filled with the crunching of the dirt beneath their feet. The brush and landscape around the Keep didn't leave much to be explored, but the two teens were enjoying spending time together, despite Hermione's complaints.

"So do we want to talk more about the weird stuff that has been happening lately?" Harry asked timidly. Truthfully he didn't want to talk about it. He liked it the way it was, magical. He didn't want to over-analyze the surprising and new things that were happening around him. Over the years, all the 'different' things about him had become a problem, a reason to be ostracized. He was incredibly hesitant to delve into a new one.

"As much as I would love to chalk the Patronus up to a one-time thing and because you had such strong feelings you wanted to share," she blushed, "I think it is more responsible to understand what we are dealing with."

Harry heaved a mighty sigh. "Well...that wasn't the first time it happened," Harry said slowly.

"Excuse me?"

"Well, I did notice it one other time, when, uh, your house was exploding." She stared him down waiting for him to continue. "You reached out and grabbed my hand when everything started to fall, and, I dunno, I just felt different. Then the dome turned to gold...and you know the rest." Harry nudged a rock on the ground over revealing a few grubworms and beetles underneath.

As the bugs scattered and he returned his focus to Hermione, he could see that the gears were turning at high speed.

"That might explain some of the changes in the shape of the spell but that doesn't explain the wandless magic," Hermione said as she tucked some hair behind her ear.

"I still don't understand what the fuss is about that. I swear that I have seen other wizards do that stuff all the time!" Harry said, again exasperated about this point.

"No, Harry, you haven't. That's what I've been trying to tell you. You haven't been seeing others do wandless magic all the time. All you have been seeing is enchanted objects that appeared to be wandless magic, like my floating book charm, " Hermione explained.

"That still doesn't make sense Hermione. If that was the case, then why can I do it without it being an issue?" he said, feeling more uneasy about the topic.

She put a hand on the center of his chest. "Harry. Look at me." She waited until he did. "It's going to be ok. Just because there is something unique about you, doesn't mean it has to be bad, ok?" She smiled at him and, he had to admit, it did make him feel better.

Harry thought for a moment back to what Dumbledore had told him back after he had come out of the Chamber in second year.

"Do you know if Tom can do wandless magic?" Harry asked, his eyes downcast and filled with shame he didn't want to admit. Harry didn't want to tell Hermione that he was scared. Dumbledore had told him a long time ago that some of Voldemort was imprinted on Harry when he was young and that was why he could talk to snakes. Could more of Voldemort have imprinted on him? If these powers could leave a mark inside of him like that, could Voldemort have shared other qualities with him as well?

"It doesn't matter if he can. Because Harry Potter can do wandless magic. Tom Riddle is just a prick who cheats at a game of cards." She stepped forward and kissed him on the cheek. "You are you, Harry! You are not Tom. It doesn't matter what you might share. Even if you were twins, you would still not be him and he would not be you. Never forget that."

"Thank you, Hermione." Harry tried to let some of the anxiety go, but it was like trying to drop a ball of tentacula sap. "Sometimes there are so many similarities between us that it gets ... difficult to remember those things. Thank you."

"Don't worry Harry, I'll always be here to reassure you," She paused. "This morning we were talking about the lake with the time turner. You said you knew you could cast the Patronus because you had seen yourself do it before. Right?"

"Yeah, I thought it was my dad or something, but it was just us a few hours in the future. I'm not seeing your point," Harry responded, confused.

"I think you are doing the wandless magic because you assume you have seen it for so long. You have convinced yourself you can do wandless magic since everyone else can in your eyes," Hermione said, still chewing her lip in thought.

"If that was the case, I would be the best quidditch player in the entire world! Training would be easy- I could just watch other people's matches," Harry said, baffled by the way of learning that she was describing.

"Exactly, that's not the way it is supposed to work. Magic has a lot to do with intention. You thought you could do a lot of things and then you did. I think this wandless magic is just another manifestation of that," she said with finality, having decided that she was right.

"I mean I guess we could look into it?" Harry said, still trying to wrap his mind around the ideas.

"I think in this case, don't look a gift horse in the mouth. Your wandless casting is going to be a huge benefit. No point in overthinking it," Hermione said with a smile.

"Did you just suggest not overthinking something?" Harry asked feigning shock.

"Hush, you! There are a few other things I like not thinking about you know," Hermione said with a completely new tone of voice that Harry found himself liking very much.

"Why don't we go back to the library then...to study."

Hermione grinned fiercely and tugged on his hand. "That's the hottest thing anyone has ever said to me, get a move on Potter."

* * *

**Monday, August 5th, 1997**

Dawn was a hard time to set an alarm for. The clock on Harry's night table blared horribly at him, letting him know he had fifteen minutes to be outside and ready to go. He could hear other footsteps in the house and knew that Hermione would already be wandering around prepared. Ron was due here at any moment, having promised that he would be here before sunrise.

Hermione, of course, had tried to pepper Tonks with questions the day before about the training. Tonks had found the inquisition amusing. Harry had a tough time figuring out when she was messing with them and when she was giving them a real answer. By the end of the day, Harry and Hermione had gotten the message clearly- they should expect anything to happen.

Harry had asked Tonks his question too, namely about the types of clothing that Aurors wore on assignment. Luckily at least this answer was straightforward. She explained that for the most part, they wore fairly formal robes. For the past decade and a half they hadn't had any real opponents to fight other than common criminals, they hadn't needed to use enough brute force to warrant any heavier defense gear. Not that they could have gotten it if they wanted to. Fudge had managed to shred the budget for the Auror Corps into a small fund that barely paid for their salaries at all. Harry had thrown out the idea of replicating their attire for his training. Everything from this point on was going to be brutal and off the books. It was a war. Doing formal dueling stances or wearing complicated robes would only be a hindrance.

Instead, Harry and Hermione would be wearing black pants that were roomy through the legs. Tonks had described them as fatigues and Hermione had clarified that it was a type of pants mostly worn by members of the military. Harry figured that the pants' multiple pockets and ease of movement would be good in just about any environment. Tonks had brought them home for them since they had no idea what to get for themselves. He threw on a tighter fitting black shirt. He didn't want it baggy enough to catch on anything. Who knew what Moody would be throwing at them.

Harry slipped his wand into his holster and left his room. He waited at the foot of the stairs for Hermione. Ron hadn't shown up yet and there were only a few more minutes until Moody would be showing up in the back yard. Naturally, Hermione arrived before Ron. Harry had to take a moment to appreciate how she looked. She was wearing similar pants to his, just with a slightly more feminine cut. She also had a tight black shirt that clung to her tightly. It showed the outline of what Harry assumed was a sports bra, but it was utilitarian overall. Harry had to admit that she looked incredible in just about anything she was wearing, and this was certainly no exception. Her hair was pulled back into a tight ponytail that, uncharacteristically, didn't have a single hair out of place.

"That poor hairband going to give up on you like the other day?" Harry asked chuckling.

She blinked a few times at him, taking a few seconds to register what he had said, her pre-coffee bleariness showing. "Oh, uh, yeah. I made sure to charm this one. I could hold a dragon down with this one." She walked over and gave him a tight good morning hug. "Your breath smells better," she said and then kissed him on the cheek.

"No coffee this morning?" Harry asked as they walked towards the back of the Keep.

"No. I'm going to have to get used to not having the stuff. There is no telling what the rest of this war is going to look like. I can't rely on luxuries like that anymore. Also, coffee before working out leads to a very upset stomach, or so it says in the book I read on exercise," Hermione said, forcing herself to blink the sleep out of her eyes.

The fireplace blared to life and Ron stepped out in similar clothing to Harry and Hermione. They had chatted the day before to give Ron the details so he knew what to wear. Tonks had given him some of the same clothes as Hermione and Harry had. Ron smiled at them and stepped out of the fireplace. Harry noticed that he looked fully awake.

"You look chipper this morning," Harry said, fighting off a yawn.

"Well, time to take stuff seriously right? Sleeping through classes is one thing...this is different," Ron said with a tone of voice that Harry hadn't heard from him before.

"Thanks, mate," Harry said thankfully.

"Good morning Hermione. Wow...those...are...clothes. That people can…wear," Ron stammered. He seemed very caught off guard.

"I'm so tired, I'm just going to take that as a compliment," Hermione said, smiling at Ron despite herself.

Hermione leaned over to Harry and tried to smooth his hair down some, then kissed him on the nose.

"Woah, so that's a thing?" Ron asked, though less surprised than Harry would have thought.

"Yeah, we didn't get a chance to tell you after the wedding, and it didn't seem like something that we wanted to talk about over Floo or Owl," Harry said.

"Did Remus already pay your Mum?" Ron asked fishing in his pocket distractedly.

"What!" Harry and Hermione both said at the same time.

"Ah good, I'll leave a few sickles here for her," Ron mumbled putting some money on the counter.

"You were in on the bet?" Hermione said, finally seeming to wake up a bit.

"Yeah, there were a few of us talking around one of the tables at the wedding and drinking a bit. You two were off doing who-knows-what and the bet just kind of went around the table. I only lost by two weeks. Remus was way off, he had Christmas."

"I think you need to talk with your Mum about boundaries with our personal life," Harry said to Hermione.

She narrowed her eyes, "I think you should have a talk with my mother about boundaries with our personal lives," she said, poking him in the chest.

"Guys, as hilarious as this is to watch you fight like an old married couple, the sun is gonna rise real soon," Ron said.

"I can't believe Ron Weasley is keeping me on schedule," Hermione said to herself while lightly slapping her cheeks to wake herself up.

Moody had said dawn, and as much as Harry wanted to think otherwise, he was fairly sure he would not have said that if he didn't mean it. Harry cast a glance from side to side, trying to pull apart the different shapes in the distance. The back yard area proper only really extended about twenty yards in any direction before the brush and landscape took the land back. The yard had been cleared somewhat when the house was built, but it hadn't been maintained much. The grass grew close and there wasn't an abundance of taller shrubbery, the difference being all that made this section the back yard and anything beyond not.

The pre-dawn light gave everything an odd cast. Even as the sun was starting to break over the horizon, the shadows shifted oddly as the night gave way to day and Harry slid his wand out of his holster. Hermione noticed him do this and took hers out as well. Ron looked back and forth between the two of them and fumbled in his robes for his wand. He finally extracted it and opened his mouth to say something but it was cut off by a flash of light from somewhere to their left.

"Damn him!" Harry said as he snapped a shield charm in place, bouncing the amber curse off into the sky. Hermione slid in close to him and pressed her shoulder to his. Ron fit in on his other side, and between the three of them, they had a good view of almost the entire yard. Having themselves shoulder to shoulder proved to be a good idea when several curses came from a different direction. Ron was up to the task just fine and bounced them away into the brush where they fizzled harmlessly.

"He must be disillusioned and moving around us. Keep an eye in every direction," Harry said calmly. While he was almost completely confident that this was Moody testing them, there was always the off chance that this was a real attack. They had been tricked by an imposter Mad-Eye once before.

"Hermione, what are the best ways to catch someone disillusioned?" Harry asked as his eyes and wand snapped back and forth across his line of sight.

"Well, usually you look for variances in the light around where you think someone might be. The shimmer is usually a dead giveaway, but in low light conditions or changing light conditions, it is much harder. This is the best time of day to use a disillusionment charm, really," Hermione said tensely. She was thinking along the same lines that Harry was. It was comforting to know that she was taking this as seriously as he was.

"Alright. Well, I think the best we can hope for is either catching some movement in the mist or tracing the source of the spellfire," Harry said.

"Harry, I'm not sure standing in one position like this is a good idea," Ron said. "We make a really easy target."

"Suggestions?" Harry said as he snapped another shield in place and bounced another curse into the distance.

"Sorry mate, the only things that are coming to mind right now are quidditch maneuvers."

"Don't discount those. They could help. What would you do as a Keeper if you had opponents coming from multiple sides?" Hermione asked.

"Well, usually I would signal to one of the beaters to take out one of the sides so I could focus on the other. I called it the Beat and Bounce," Ron said, fending off another spell.

"Clever," Harry grunted.

"Well, without the beaters, I suppose we could wait for the next spell and then break up and swing in from multiple sides? He has to fire a spell and then move right?" Ron asked.

"Sounds good. Next spell, rush that location. I'll go down the middle and you two take the sides," Harry said, getting ready to run.

It didn't take long for a blue flash to come out of the now-shrinking shadows. Harry blocked the spell into the air and rushed forward, snapping out a few stunning spells as he did. Ron and Hermione fell swooped out to the sides of him, hoping to pincer in on a single point.

It was over before it started. Harry had only taken a few steps before he was hit with a tripping jinx and hit the ground hard. The muffled gasps from his sides confirmed that Hermione and Ron both had also fallen to similar fates. The fact that he had been hit with a tripping jinx let Harry know that he was most likely facing his trainer and not people out to kill them. Binding spells came out next as Harry tried to stand. He felt his feet snap together, preventing him from doing much more than rolling over.

When he did he found Mad-Eye staring down at him with a flat expression on his face. "Really? Rushing straight forward? Albus always said you were bright. He must have been getting confused in his old age."

Harry grunted as the spells wore off and he stood. He was surprised to find Remus and Tonks standing over Ron and Hermione respectively.

"You also assumed how many opponents you were facing. Bad idea," Moody said gruffly.

"So that's why you were hanging about yesterday huh?" Harry asked Tonks.

"Yup! Figured everyone I would get a kick out of helping. Besides, Mad-Eye has spent a long time behind a desk, so I figured I could help with some of the more practical stuff. Remus is just along for the fun," Tonks said, helping Hermione to her feet.

"That, and when we graduated and joined the Order, I trained with Sirius and your parents. Lily was a hell of a fighter when she wanted to be," Remus said gruffly, helping an out-of-breath Ron up from the ground.

"To your credit, using Ron's knowledge of Quidditch strategy was good thinking Hermione. Use anything you have at your disposal. Even if it doesn't pan out, any idea is better than no idea," Tonks said.

"I agree, that was quick thinking. With some more training, you three will be able to capitalize on those kinds of moments a lot better and faster," Remus agreed.

The rest of the day fell into a blur for Harry. They swapped back and forth between spell casting and calisthenics so fast that sometimes Harry was doing pushups with his wand in his hand just to keep up. Their training went on for the majority of the day, only taking breaks at lunch to eat and get something to drink.

Hermione and Ron's skillsets were distinct for the most part. Ron had Hermione beat on endurance, but Hermione had him crushed when it came to spell knowledge and speed. Neither of them was necessarily bad at the other skill, but they were clearly in their element when using each of their strengths.

Harry, though, felt like he was struggling with everything. He was putting everything he had into the training, and he felt like he was coming up empty-handed. So many times when he had been in fight or flight situations, he had chosen to fight and things had just worked out. Yet now, faced with the barking commands of the Order members, he was finding himself faltering and struggling to focus on what he needed to do. As his frustration built over the day, his aptitude slipped. Several times he had misjudged which direction a spell was going to come from and had ended up on his back from a stunning spell.

Ron and Hermione sensed his frustration and tried to encourage him, but that seemed to only aggravate him more. He tried not to take it out on his friends, but it was hard to keep on track.

"POTTER!" Moody barked. "What the flying hell has gotten into you today? Did you forget which end of the wand was the pointy side?"

Harry brushed himself off and got up off the ground again. This time his pride was much more bruised than his backside. "I don't know what's going on! Anytime I have needed to do this stuff, it has just…I don't know… happened," Harry said frustratedly.

"Well, I expect you to figure it out. We're done for today. You are all sufficiently exhausted I think. Tomorrow we will start at sunrise rather than dawn. I expect you to have done all your stretching and warm-ups by then. Clear?" Moody barked.

"Yes sir!" the three responded. It was going to be a very long week.

Harry finally had showered, as had his friends. Ron was sticking around some of the days to do some research and spitballing with Harry and Hermione. Harry and Ron were sitting in the late afternoon gloom of the library tossing a quaffle back and forth.

"Are there any legends or anything that you can think of that could be related to the founders at all? The memories I saw last year were pretty specific to what Dumbledore thought Voldemort was going after." Harry tossed to Ron.

Ron caught and thought for a moment before tossing it back. "Most of the ones that I heard were about Godric Gryffindor. He was legendary, along the lines of King Arthur and Merlin legendary. I mean, our entire family has always been in Gryffindor, so that's the main legends I heard growing up. I'm sure there are more that I'm not thinking of."

Harry spun the ball on the tip of his index finger for a moment. "Hm, well I don't think he used the sword, since as far as I can tell, it had been hidden for a long time by the Sorting Hat." He launched the ball towards the redhead.

Ron caught it and threw it between his hands nimbly. "That makes sense since the Sorting Hat was also Godric's."

There was a muffled "hmpf" from the nearby table followed by a shuffle and thud. Hermione was now face down on top of her books, her arms hanging limply at her sides. "I am so tired," was only barely understandable from the bushel of hair that was now covering every book within a foot of her head.

"Yeah, I am too." Ron pulled out his wand, tapped the quaffle lightly, and muttered a short word. He then tossed it across the room where it stopped on Hermione's head with a very light bounce.

"I don't even care Ronald," Hermione's muffled voice called back.

Harry and Ron shared a solid laugh before Ron bid them goodnight and left for the Burrow.

"You do look tired," Harry said as he went across the room and sat down in the chair at the table facing Hermione.

She lifted her head just enough so her eyes could peek at him through her hair. "No wonder you're a Seeker. So observant," Hermione said, her eyes twinkling with a smile he couldn't see.


	10. Chapter 10: Occhiolism

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Hi all, first I'm going to go ahead and just start by apologizing. This was 2 days late and I'm sorry. This chapter needed quite a bit of back and forth with my wife to get right. She caught some things that were really great catches and you can attribute the quality of this chapter to her, I wanted to post it, but she made me wait. In the future, I think we are going to post on Fridays. With school starting up for our kids, we have a few things to juggle during the week. So here it is, Chapter 10. The ratings and Tags really do apply to this chapter. Please keep that in mind.
> 
> Something else I want to say before the chapter. Some of the events here were researched in-depth and when needed, handled with care and respect. You'll understand as you read, but keep in mind that I tried to stay true to history where needed, and respectful of its nature.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this! I, unfortunately, own nothing here and make no money from it, but I still love it!

**Chapter 10**

**Occhiolism**

**The awareness of the smallness of your perspective.**

* * *

**Saturday, August 30th, 1997**

An entire month of working with Moody had made quite the difference in the three trainees. Moody made sure that with every step forward they made in either their spell casting or their endurance he upped the difficulty of their training exercises. Harry didn't necessarily mind that strategy, but at the same time, he was frustrated because it felt like he wasn't making progress.

The trio's teamwork had gotten much better despite the difficult regimen. Ron, to his credit, now spent most of his free time writing out strategies, spending time in front of a chalkboard talking out different scenarios with Remus and Tonks as their dinners got cold. Ron peppered them with questions about Death Eater habits and how they usually approached a fight. He even asked Remus to describe to him how some of the werewolves fought. Remus had been uncomfortable with that but had answered dutifully. Ron's notebook was filled with X's and O's moving all over the place. Harry had never seen him work so hard without asking Hermione for help first.

Ron had moved into the Keep a few days after they started training. Moody had a habit of waking the three of them up in the middle of the night for low sleep or nighttime training. Thankfully, despite all that, Hermione and Harry had found ways to spend alone time together. Even as tired as they were, they tried to take some time most nights just to spend together and talk, walking the grounds hand in hand and talking about anything other than war.

Ron understood their need for space and maturely took those nights to spend more time with Tonks or Remus and his chalkboard. Harry appreciated the respect that Ron was giving them while they were all living under the same roof again. Between training and Order meetings, the three of them still managed to scrape a little time together to continue their research into the Horcruxes, but they decided that going after them untrained wasn't a prudent plan.

Tonks and Remus regularly brought them books on the subjects they were practicing. At first, the teens had thought that they were just supplemental books to read in their downtime. That had proved to be another bad assumption on their part. The morning after they had gotten the first few books, Remus and Tonks quizzed them rather brutally on their contents. Hermione had been the only one who had come close to getting anything right. The books had been on unit movements and code words to use in a "radio silent" type of situation. Harry and Ron, being clueless as to what they were being asked, had no idea how to respond to the cryptic instructions Hermione was giving them.

Remus had taken it upon himself to prepare the teens mentally for war. He gave them sections of different history books to read, magical and non-magical alike. Remus was intent on keeping their minds intact through what was to come. "This is a very important point," he said with a grave tone to his voice. "Taking a life, no matter what the circumstances, does something to you." Remus and Harry shared an intense look. "You both know this to some extent," he continued, nodding at Harry and Hermione, "but being backed into a corner and being the one attacking aren't the same. When you go in as a soldier, you are planning on taking a life. You have made a _choice_."

"Why isn't that something that Tonks taught us about then, from the Academy books?" Hermione asked.

"Tonks can't tell you about it, because Aurors aren't soldiers. They are law enforcement. Tonks didn't fight in the last War. She doesn't know like some of the rest of us do. Watching people get killed or torn apart in front of you, the things you might have to do to keep others safe...these are things that will change you, forever." Remus' pensive dark stare was enough to convince Harry that the man wasn't exaggerating. Hermione looked uncomfortable.

"Strike you the wrong way, does it, lassie?" Moody remarked with a humorless smile. "Think about what these men are capable of. Think about what they have done already. You stun one and all you have done is take him out of the fight for a few minutes until one of his friends can bring him back. Then you have two deadly wands on you instead of one. You aren't protecting just yourself, you are protecting everyone else who is fighting with you and you are protecting everyone else that they might face after you."

"Yes," Remus cut in. "These men are like shadows. If you don't take the chance to take them out when you can, then one of their lives," Remus pointed at Harry and Ron, "may be on your soul." After that Hermione had been silent for a long time.

Harry sat in his usual chair with Hermione and Ron next to him in the Order meeting that was currently underway. Hermione looked alert and was paying close attention to what was being said. In a true twist of events, Ron was sitting with some scratch parchment and was sketching out a defensive strategy that involved the long house tables in the Great Hall. Harry still couldn't believe that it was the same Ron from a month ago. His skill in chess was unmatched by almost all of the people in the group, so it didn't come as a shock that he was talented at thinking a few steps ahead.

Harry was brought out of these thoughts as Arthur stepped up to the front of the room and addressed them. "Sorry for having to call this meeting on such short notice. Early this morning we made contact with our informant."

The room got quiet as everyone laser-focused their attention to Arthur. "His tip was in the form of this newspaper article with a date written on it."

The article read "CoCo Killers Strike Again!" across the top of the page in dark ink. It wasn't a moving newspaper and even Harry could see that it was from non-magical Paris. "There aren't any code words that we can tell, but if the date is to be believed, we don't have a lot of time."

Hermione rocketed out of her chair and teleported to the front of the room to hold the newspaper close.

"The Hotel Ritz!" she exclaimed suddenly. "This is a reference to the death of CoCo Chanel. She started a fashion line, of course, but she is also famous for having sided with the Nazis in World War Two. She died in the hotel and people claim she still haunts it." Hermione was babbling away while her eyes skimmed the paper, completely unaware that everyone in the room had eyes locked on her.

She started muttering to herself. No one interrupted her until her head came back up again. "Something is happening in France that has gone under our radar. Whoever is doing this wants to stay out of sight from _anyone_ in Britain. That's why this is a muggle newspaper. There will be some kind of attack at the Hotel Ritz, in Paris, today. That's what this means." She confidently handed the paper back to Arthur and took her seat without another word.

Silence overtook the room and Harry grinned like an idiot. He wasn't the slightest bit surprised that Hermione knew all of that.

Hermione finally blushed. "I did some reading on famous locations in France when I went with my parents. It was a news article at the time..."

"I don't care if you read it on the back of your toilet paper roll. Damn good work," Moody said, matching raised eyebrows over his mismatched eyes.

"In that case, Remus and I will take the first shift watching the hotel. I have the best chance of blending in during the day if needed," Tonks piped up from the side of the room.

Arthur nodded, "I'll give you the details in a few minutes once we work out who is taking what shifts."

"George and I can go after that. Gives us a chance to test out some of our new inventions," Fred said, nodding at his brother. "We have a way of listening to different areas now. Though it won't do a lot of good in France, as we don't exactly speak French."

"Fleur, you could help with that. Would you be able to go as well to help keep an ear out?" Arthur asked.

"Papa Weasley," Fluer said from beside Bill. She had been looking down at a sheet of parchment on the table, which Harry assumed had some of the details written down on it. "I don't think I would be able to blend in at this hotel. My father has sizable holdings in a few of the hotels in this part of town, but not The Ritz. If I was going to be at a hotel in France, then I would surely be at one of the ones my father has a business relationship with. If I was to show up there, it would cause questions," Fluer said, shaking her head disappointedly.

Harry stood up abruptly. "Arthur, let me, Ron, and Hermione take a shift."

Arther glanced at Moody. Harry could tell Arthur was caught between turning them down and showing appreciation for Hermione's revelation about the intel. "How has their training been going?"

"They are doing well, but I'm not sure now is the time to test it," Moody said gruffly. "That's not to speak ill of you lot, it's just the truth. Auror Academy is years long. You three have been at this a month."

"What if we took a shift in the middle of the night?" Harry fumbled, looking for an excuse to be allowed to go. He wanted to be doing something, he wanted to finally be making a difference, and recently they had started to come together as a team. "We are ready for this."

Moody studied the three of them intently. "Alright, if we still need it, you three can take a shift late at night. A short one. But you call for backup if there's any real trouble."

Harry grinned, the thrill rising in him. A month's worth of training, finally getting to be tested! They had dropped out of school to fight in this war, demanded to be part of a shadow rebellion, and now finally, they were going to fight. And not like all the other times Harry had fought for his life in the past. This time he would be ready.

"Go prepare yourself, and maybe try to get a few hours of sleep." Arthur turned back to Remus and Tonks and started discussing tactical ideas.

As the room cleared, Fred and George sought Harry, Ron, and Hermione out and tugged them aside. "Mates, I think now is a good time to show you some of the things we have been working on for you. A few of these things will be a big help tonight," Fred said, leading the others out of the room and down the hall of the Keep.

"I think you guys are going to like the things we have to show you," George said as he sat down on Harry's bed and pulled out a small knapsack.

"These are replacements for your shirts. Use these black tops instead tonight. They have cushioning charms built-in that will withstand mild impacts," George handed those to the three of them and Fred reached in the bag next.

He handed each of them a new wand holster. "These are upgraded holsters. They hold your wand on one side like normal, but they're charmed to blend into your skin. It's not completely invisible like Harry's cloak, but it's as close as you can get with a charm."

"These are great. Thanks, guys," Harry said.

"Don't mention it. What kind of brothers would we be if we didn't make sure you had the best," George said, ruffling his younger brother's red hair.

"Geroff," Ron said, smiling at his brothers. Then he looked at Harry and Hermione and gave a nod. For once they weren't rushing in unprepared. They were ready this time.

* * *

Harry fidgeted in his blackout gear. The looser fitting black canvas pants were now much less stiff than they had been when he had first started wearing them. They stretched and moved with him very well now and they felt right. Having clothes that moved with you instead of robes that rustled made so much sense. The black shirt fit a bit more tightly across his chest, having filled out a considerable amount over the month.

Hermione clipped a few things to her belt. She was also dressed in much the same way Harry was and Harry still appreciated the look on her more than he cared to admit. "I'm concerned that there is a bigger plan here that we aren't seeing," she said uneasily. "I hope I didn't make a mistake."

"I agree with you. Something isn't right but I can't put my finger on it. But I still think this is the right place. Something just feels off about this hotel," Harry said, forcing himself to stop fidgeting. Harry couldn't explain why, but something about the Hotel just felt wrong to him. His skin hadn't stopped crawling since the moment they had entered the building.

" _Chronos,_ _"_ Harry said to his outstretched palm and lively green digits flashed a few times in the air. 12:16 AM.

They had already been there for two hours and their shift ended in just a little over an hour. The time spent in the room had felt like an eternity. For every minute that nothing happened, Harry grew more and more restless.

"Hermione, maybe take another listen to the bodyguards posted downstairs. They are the only thing out of the ordinary we have seen," Harry said absently as he sat back in the small chair, annoyed.

Hermione nodded and picked up the small earpiece. The twins had found a way to make their extendable ears wireless. Hermione was the only one that understood French, so she popped it into her ear and sat for a moment.

Not three minutes had passed when Harry noticed her expression change. "Oh god, I know what we missed."

"What did you hear!?" Ron asked as his head snapped around to look at her.

"Princess Diana of Wales is in the hotel. She is about to leave out the back entrance. That's what we missed. They are going to kill the Princess!" Hermione barely gasped the last word. "We have to go now!" she said in a panicked voice before they all started moving at once.

They slipped out of the room and headed up to the roof as fast as they could without drawing attention to themselves. There weren't many people exploring the hotel at this hour, so they didn't run into anyone other than the sleepy-looking security guard who didn't remember them a moment after they had passed. The doors blocking the roof access weren't a problem now that they had the small pen knives on their holsters.

Once on the roof, they unshrank the brooms from their pockets and slipped onto them quickly. They scrambled into the air in a frantic search to see which car was leaving the hotel. A regal-looking Mercedes pulled out of the parking area drove away from the hotel at a quick pace. Almost losing sight of it in the streets Harry and Ron didn't waste a second before tilting the brooms in pursuit from above the clouds. Trying to keep the broom steady and on track with Hermione behind him was difficult at best. At the speed that he and Ron were traveling it was dangerous for either him or Hermione to take their hands off the broom. Harry told himself that was the reason he wasn't using the mirror in his pocket. Yet, there was a deep part of him that wanted to prove to the Order that he could finally step into his parents' shoes, not just as The-Boy-Who-Lived, but as Harry James Potter. He would use the mirror when he landed, he told himself.

From the air, they saw the black Mercedes-Benz S280 slipping down the road. The three of them didn't say anything as they flew hidden above the clouds from the Hôtel Ritz and slipped down towards the Place de la Concorde watching the car drive south. Harry was no expert on driving, but the car did look to be swerving a bit more the needed around turns. The black car turned west on the embankment road along the river Seine.

"Hermione, isn't Le Bourget Airfield to the north? The car is still heading west." Harry whispered backward to Hermione. Hermione had heard as they ran up the stairs from the extendable ear that the Princess would be heading back to London tonight from the same private jet she had arrived in.

She turned her head so she wasn't faced with his back anymore. "Yes, Le Bourget Paris is to the north. That's where their private jet is, so we can assume they aren't flying anywhere at the moment." Hermione said, pinching his sides a few times as he corrected course.

Harry nodded and turned again to get a new visual on the car. The car was still on the embankment road, but a new car appeared to be following behind them. It was a decent distance back, but there weren't that many cars on the road with them at the moment, and from the air, it looked fairly obvious that the car was following them.

"They are heading for the tunnel. And it looks like that car is going to follow them." Ron said, pointing to the same car Harry noticed.

When Harry followed the trace of Ron's finger he saw them. Silhouettes appearing out of the night air sped toward the black car. "Riders!" Harry barked and nosed the broom forward to top speed. Hermione clenched on to him hard, but she didn't scream. They had practiced this several times over the last month, what this would feel like. She was doing admirably well.

Wand tips alight, Harry and Ron took aim and fired stunners at the riders. Hermione kept her wand close in case she needed to provide defense from the back of Harry's broom. The riders dodged at the last minute and the stunners went wide. Knocking them off their brooms at this height was as good as killing them but without the risk of the offensive magic hitting anyone else nearby.

The riders immediately responded with bolts of green lightning racing across the sky. Harry and Ron had no problem dodging the poorly aimed killing curses. They were outnumbered four to three, but Harry wasn't concerned. They were all still following the path of the car when the two groups cut a flight pattern through one another. Not willing to lose the brooms in the dark background of night, Harry and Ron dove their brooms at pull speed to collide with the other riders.

The Death Eaters were confused by their aggressive tactic and were too slow to react in time. As they dove through the group of flying Death Eaters, trails of fire fell behind them as Ron unleashed flames through the air. The flames crawled down the Death Eater's broom handles and then the twigs at the base. Holding on to nothing more than a hot stick of char, the Death Eaters fell from the sky. The sounds of bodies slamming into the pavement echoed up to Harry's ears.

The cars were almost at the mouth of the tunnel now. The car that had been following, which Harry noticed was a Fiat, was now neck and neck with the Mercedes. Harry could see cars funneling through in each direction through the pillars that separated the two flows of traffic.

Harry's eyes darted around frantically trying to find where the next target was going to come from. He almost missed the man leaning out of the Fiat with a gun.

Ron yelled his name. Harry was able to get off a single spell that connected with the back end of the car. The small car swerved at the last moment in front of the Mercedes and the already unstable driving of the black car intensified. Within a split second, it slammed into the pillar between the two lanes of traffic. The sound of smashing metal and shattering glass echoed up to the three of them. The car bounced off the pillar and slammed back first into the stone wall of the tunnel.

The three of them couldn't easily see the Mercedes from here without being in the tunnel itself since the car had just passed into the tunnel proper. The overpass was busy enough, but Harry could see the Fiat make a quick turn about in the intersection at the mouth of the tunnel and make an attempt to shoot through to the other side.

"Ron, stop that car! I'm going to go down and see if there is anything we can do for the Princess!" Harry said. Hermione snapped her wand at them as fast as he had ever seen her cast. Disillusionment charms settled into place and they all faded from sight. Harry and Hermione dove down into the intersection and landed on the far side of a pillar. They let the charms go while no one was looking at them and sprinted over to the black Mercedes.

Across the intersection, Harry saw the small Fiat grind to a halt near the side of the road. Ron had managed to stop the car. Harry wanted to go give his friend some backup, but for now, he wasn't leaving Hermione's side.

"Harry, use the mirror to call for help!" Hermione said to him as they attempted to approach.

Harry reached into his pocket to grab it. He found nothing. "It must have fallen out while we were flying!" Harry said desperately. This could be the worst moment ever for something like this to happen. The plan was spiraling out of control and Harry felt his pulse pick up even more than it already was.

Hermione finally elbowed her way through the quickly growing crowd with Harry sticking close. A man claiming to be a doctor was trying to speak to the Princess in the back seat. She was still alive, but blood streamed down her face from her ears and nose. Harry heard her mutter "Oh my god" a few times as she blinked around the ruined car and saw the two other dead men and the third looking not far away from death as well.

Hermione was babbling to them in French faster than Harry could have ever hoped to understand. Others were gathering now, close enough to make intervening with magic practically impossible.

Hermione managed to squeeze in closer to the Princess with the man claiming to be a doctor but Princess Diana just kept mumbling to "leave her alone." Harry realized that getting any closer was going to make things more difficult, so he left Hermione to her work. Leaning into the car she risked pulling out her wand to do a quick diagnosis charm on the daughter of the Royal Family. Her face told an entire tale of what the diagnosis told her. Sirens could be heard approaching, so Harry hurried over to Hermione and gently pulled her aside letting the others flood in and try to help.

"She's hurt badly, but if I got her to St. Mungo's they might be able to save her," Hermione said, pleading with him with her eyes.

"There isn't anything more we can do," Harry had to force the words out. But if they were to do magic here, they risked the Statute of Secrecy being broken on an international scale. "Let them think it was a car accident," Harry said sadly. "We need to give Ron some backup. Maybe the driver has more information for us."

Hermione looked incredibly upset at the prospect of leaving the Princess. "C'mon Hermione, we did what we could," Harry said, looking away from the wreckage and trying to comfort Hermione. She went with him reluctantly.

With the attention of everyone nearby on the site of the crash itself, slipping away wasn't difficult. They hurried over to where Harry saw the other car skid to a halt.

Ron had pulled a man out of the car and was already questioning him when they got there. The short man was dressed all in non-magical attire.

"He doesn't have a wand, Harry. I think he's a muggle," Ron said as Harry and Hermione approached.

Hermione immediately began speaking French to the man. At first, his eyes were glassy and confused. Hermione said something that was a question and a tear leaked out of the man's eye. His voice trembled as he spoke more to Hermione. Harry kept his eyes on their surroundings while Hermione talked with the now emotional man.

"Hermione, what's going on? We can't stay here much longer," Ron said, with a warning tone in his voice. He was also keeping track of things. Harry hoped he was coming up with a plan.

"He says that some men have his wife and son. They made him come here to kill the Princess." She asked him another question in French. After the man responded, Hermione returned her gaze to Harry and Ron. "He says that the man that is making him do this has short slick blond hair with an English accent. He said the last place he saw his wife and son was at the Hotel Ritz."

"Do you think you can wipe his memory and send him to the hospital? If we find his family we can send them to him," Harry asked, trying to think on his feet. "Then we can head back to the hotel and see what we can find."

Hermione and Ron nodded their agreement.

"How do we want to run this?" Hermione asked once they reached the roof of the hotel and dismounted from Harry's broom, clearly thinking through all the different choices already.

"All we know is that Draco is in there with hostages," Ron said, looking deep in thought. "Unless we got really lucky and he was one of the broom riders we handled before. But I don't think so, none of them were very experienced flyers. You said you lost the mirror?"

"Yeah, we are here on our own at the moment," Hermione said looking uncomfortable.

Harry had spent much of the previous year trailing Malfoy and even had gotten to duel him. Malfoy had made half-assed attempts to kill Dumbledore and then even failed at that in the last minute. Harry didn't feel like there was anything for them to worry about. "Malfoy barely managed to get Death Eaters into the castle last year. I feel like we can figure out what is going on and slip out before anyone notices," Harry said as confidently as he could muster after the botched plan so far.

"Harry does have a point. Cowardly git wasn't even able to kill me properly," Ron spat. Harry decided it wasn't the right time to mention that it was _Harry_ who had shoved a Bezoar in his mouth at the last moment.

Hermione still looked uncomfortable but nodded.

They dipped into the stairwell that they had come out of not long before. Hermione came in behind the other two and did a scan with her wand. The three of them exchanged glances while Hermione held up two fingers, indicating there were two people in the stairwell with them. Then she pointed down and held up 3 fingers. The two people in the stairwell with them were three floors below them. Harry and Ron nodded in silence and they started their silent descent down the stairs.

As they approached the third landing Harry held up a hand to stop the other two that had fallen in behind him. From their vantage point, they could see down on the two people on the landing below them, but they would only be seen if someone looked straight up.

"Did you know, that they say the hotel is haunted?" A voice whispered in a gravelly voice. Hermione, Ron, and Harry all remained silent, observing the scene below them.

Blaise Zabini stood on the platform with a woman with dirty blond hair, but you could only tell that from one side of her head. The other was matted down with dried blood. She looked like she had already taken a beating and Harry could tell she was favoring her right foot. Her dress was in tatters and also stained with blood.

Harry made to move forward but Hermione held up a hand. "We need to hear what he has to say. He could lead us to the others," she whispered in a hushed voice. Harry nodded, Hermione's caution was warranted.

"They say that if you listen closely at night, you can hear the screams of the women that disappear in the night. But they are wrong," Zabini whispered as he gripped her face hard in one of his hands. "Do you know why?" She tried to shake her head, but he forced her head to bob up and down.

Harry knew a second before he saw it what was going to happen, but it was too late.

"You don't have to listen that closely..." and he shoved her off the landing. She toppled over the edge and fell into the void between the boxed staircase in the middle. Her screams started shrill and loud, but after her head hit the first banister on the wild tumble down her cries went silent. The only sound the followed was the loud slapping wet impact of a body hitting a cement floor after falling fifteen stories. "Chodney, clean that up," Blaise said lazily to a house-elf that only appeared for a moment before popping away again.

Harry had hesitated. Hermione might have been the one to caution it, but he had agreed with her assessment too quickly, he had been doubting himself. Just before Blaise was about to open the door out of the stairwell, Harry took the last three stairs in one go and grabbed the man with his left hand from behind. He wrapped one hand securely around Zabini's mouth and while he held on tight he flicked his wand into his hand and put it to Blaise's temple. Before he could stop to doubt himself, Harry cast a piercing hex straight through the man's head.

A geyser of blood shot out from the side of Zabini's skull opposite Harry's wand and splattered the wall of the stairwell as his head snapped to the side and his body fell limply from Harry's arms. Harry looked down at him through flecks of blood on his glasses. Hatred rushed through his veins for the man at his feet. Not only because of the life Zabini had taken, but because he represented Harry's moment of doubt.

No one spoke. He looked between Ron and Hermione and then looked away. He didn't look at the body on the floor, as he turned to open the doorway into the hall. The hallway wasn't completely deserted. There were a few hunched over hotel staff that was bustling up and down the hall. No one was taking their eyes off the floor, which Harry didn't think was a good sign. He had closed off the part of his brain that was roiling against the feel of Blaise's head in his hands. The pressure of the spell blasting part of his head away.

They watched from the cracked door as some staff went into a room near the end of the hall and then came back out with empty dishes.

"Let's wait until the next group goes in. We can slip in with them," Ron said, pointing down the hall.

When the staff came into view again they disillusioned themselves and slipped down the hall. A quick confundus from Hermione and they were in the room.

The hotel suite was large. The large square room was only separated by glass walls and fancy art. Harry realized it wasn't just a suite, it was a penthouse. The room looked empty, but Harry imagined that with the members of the team that wasn't going to return, it would have looked full. Currently, no one but Draco Malfoy, Theodore Nott, and Vincent Crabbe Jr sat around the couches.

The three of them slipped into a dark corner near a coat area at the front of the room and observed what was happening.

"Crabbe, stop fidgeting. The others will be back any minute," Nott said from the couch.

"The Dark Lord doesn't tolerate failure," Crabbe responded from the couch. He sounded gravely concerned with more emotion in his voice than Harry ever remembered him having at Hogwarts. He didn't see any sign of Goyle.

"I am sure the Dark Lord has a reason for us being here, the French muggles will be blamed for the Princess dying. Chaos is what he wants, and I am sure that he has a reason for asking us to send him so many muggles. But that's none of my business, I just do as the Lord commands." Draco said confidently. The others in the room nodded their agreement with him. Malfoy was leading the operation here and seemed to revel in the power.

"You guys shouldn't be talking in front of the muggles. What if they say something?" Crabbe said.

Malfoy didn't look like he appreciated being questioned in front of the others. "They know their place don't they? I think Blaise was just taking one of them for a walk." Malfoy laughed as he took a sip from his tumbler. "Besides, they are all still afraid of that ghost story! Stupid little animals," Draco spat.

The conversation was interrupted when a door on the opposite end of the room opened.

A small boy, maybe six years old at most, stepped into the room rubbing his eyes tiredly. "Mamá"

Harry's blood chilled from the tone in the boy's voice. There was something mournful and scared that reverberated in that single word. At least finding the boy hadn't been difficult.

One of the staff members looked around quickly. She snapped off a quick line of French that Harry didn't understand. Harry assumed she was telling the boy to go back to his room.

"No..." Hermione breathed barely audibly.

"The boy is supposed to stay in his room while you entertain us. Blaise already had to teach your sister that lesson today. Do you want to be next?" Malfoy sneered.

"What did you do to 'Bella!?" the woman cried, seeming to lose control of her composure. She spoke fluent English but had a strong accent.

There were only two staff members in the room. The third they had presumably seen earlier. Nott got up from the couch and stepped forward to backhand the woman across the face with incredible force. She spun and slammed her head into the edge of the table with a sharp crack.

"Don't hurt mamá!" The little boy screamed and tried to shove Malfoy. His mother was struggling to push herself up but was now bleeding down the side of her face.

Malfoy's nostrils flared with rage and his face started to get bright red. He slowly put the drink in his hand down and his other hand flashed out and snagged the boy's arm, yanking him towards himself. "How dare you take that tone with me you little vermin!"

"Please I'm sorry," the woman on the floor began weeping and attempting to pull herself closer to her son. "Don't hurt him, he's just a boy," she mumbled thickly.

Malfoy seethed with rage as he put his wand tip to the boy's forearm. Sizzling could be heard from across the room for a split second until the boy's screams of pain drowned it out.

His mother's screams were worse.

Ron snapped a hex off at Draco that would have taken his head off if it hadn't gone slightly wide. Chaos broke out as the three Death Eaters realized they weren't alone. Harry and Ron followed up with responding hexes just as Hermione's shield burst to life around the three of them. With deadly, practiced precision, Harry rolled in front of Hermione's shield and flicked his wand to the side.

The child's screams, the sound of spellfire, the grunt, and curses of pain- it all overlapped into a maelstrom of sound and input that Harry thought was going to overload his brain. Harry dove back under the shield that Ron had taken responsibility for from Hermione so she could fire some curses as well. Harry took up the shield and Ron began to return fire to the left side of the room. With a few distraction blasts and a better aimed piercing hex or two, the left side of the room was cleared as well.

Nott broke out from the shattered remains of a couch that he had ducked behind. He raised a wand pointed at Hermione and Harry snapped a blasting jinx at him that removed his head from his shoulders in a spray. Harry was about to change his focus to firing on Malfoy when he stayed his hand at the last moment.

"Drop your wands, or I blow this little shit's head off."

The room got very quiet and still. The only people left were Draco and Crabbe and the hotel employees. One of the women huddled near the door, pushed as far against the wall as possible and the boy's mother had pulled herself a few feet attempting to get to her son, but had since stopped moving.

"Potter. Should have known," Malfoy said with only half surprise on his face. "Drop your wands. I'll have to bring you to the Dark Lord alive, but I can take my time." Crabbe looked very uncomfortable with the idea. His eyes still trailing to the crumble of body and blood that was the remains of Nott.

Harry didn't intend to go down without a fight. Hermione and Ron seemed to agree. Malfoy rolled his eyes and fired a killing curse across the room, striking the woman near the entrance of the room. Ron surged forward again preparing to fight.

Draco just smiled and pressed his wand tip to the boy's cheek, dimpling it painfully. Ron stopped threw his wand down. "You son of a bitch," Ron snarled.

"Put. Them. Down."

"I'll fucking kill you Malfoy," Harry said venomously as he dropped his wand to the floor. Harry almost felt a thrill of victory when he realized he could still get the drop on Malfoy with his wandless magic. Draco quickly bound Hermione's hands with a flick and did the same to Ron.

Crabbe turned his attention to Harry with a strike to Harry's kidney. The punch wasn't hard, but it seemed to pierce through him in an unfamiliar way. He staggered backward feeling his muscles twitch painfully. Malfoy pointed his wand at Harry and lazily flicked a binding spell at him. Harry grabbed Crabbe's hanging robes and yanked him in front of Draco's spell. The ropes slithered out of Draco's wand and wrapped themselves around Crabbe's throat. Harry took the opportunity before his twitching muscles failed him and pulled hard on the cord and shoved hard with his other hand on Crabbe's temple. He heard the crack and Crabbe's dead weight fell onto him and took him to the ground.

Harry didn't have to even hear the incantation to know what was coming next. The unforgivable hit him like bolts of electricity running through him. His body twitched and writhed into different contorted positions trying to alleviate the pain that was racing through him. To no avail, Harry screamed until it finally let up. Deep down Harry knew that the screams would go unheard. The hotel room surely had soundproofing charms on it, otherwise, someone would have noticed by now.

Harry slowly became aware of the sounds of Malfoy laughing and Hermione screaming his name.

Harry's body was overloaded. His arms and legs were shooting with pain and he could feel his muscles twitching and knotting in an undulating wave. Draco hit him with a simple body bind that seemed absolute and the torture that his muscles were undergoing was something he had hoped to never experience again. The boy was screaming and struggling against Malfoy's grip in earnest now. No amount of threat could still the panicked child. His mother had fallen quiet with her head resting on her outstretched hand.

With no more use for the little boy, Malfoy let him go and he scurried across the room in tears to the still form of his mother. Harry felt like he was in a living nightmare. The little boy rocked his mother back and forth, screaming to her in French while surrounded by death and gore, stretched every one of Harry's heartstrings until they all snapped. Harry's thoughts were wild and frenzied. There was no materializing calm or understanding. There was no moment of clarity and time did not slow down. This was unlike anything he had ever experienced before. Remus's words and warnings about not understanding the true brutality of the Death Eaters was ringing through his thoughts. Faced with the scene before him, he didn't find any solace in his training, just deep despair at the sight.

Draco grew frustrated with the pining from the boy over his mother's body. The pool of blood under her head had slowly grown to the point where it wasn't able to soak into the carpet any more than it already had. "Shut up!" Draco's foot flew forward and slammed into the boy's side, throwing him with a crash through a side table where he fell still. Harry's mind and body were on fire. His entire consciousness was full of terror and panic.

With Ron and Harry bound and held in place as they were, Hermione now stood alone with Draco in the middle of the room at wand point. Malfoy sneered in the same was that he had since the first day that Harry had met him. Another body bind and Hermione froze in place.

"I want you to watch what I do to them first," Malfoy whispered to the now frozen Hermione. Sheer terror captured her face and a single tear slid down her cheek while she was unable to move or even blink. Draco smiled as he dragged the tip of his wand down Hermione's cheek, tracing the trail of her tear. She shivered and bit her lip, more tears pooling and falling silently. The wand tip made a small sizzle and Harry could see a small line of blood appear on her cheek as he drew the wand down. Harry could do nothing to help. He strained and pushed his body but nothing magical nor mundane happened.

" _CRUCIO!_ _"_ Malfoy cried as he jabbed his wand at Ron. The yellow beam split the air and Ron's screams rent the air further. Harry strained against his cursed bindings until he felt like his eyes would pop out of his sockets. He strained and fought against the bonds with the cohesion of a frenzied wolf in a bear trap. It was all to no effect. Harry begged every deity that he had ever heard of for just a tiny mote of wandless magic. Some last-minute boon to get them to safety. The only thing he found in the depths of his mind was darkness and fear.

Malfoy let up his curse. Ron rolled to his side facing Harry and coughed out a spray of blood. He spit more blood on to the floor and tried to regain his composure.

"Weasley, a poor, worthless, mudblood-lover!" Malfoy snapped his wand upward a flick and Ron was pulled to his feet by invisible hands. As Ron's toes left the ground and the sounds of his gasped breathing faltered in the air, Malfoy whipped his wand in a circular motion and a bolt of purple magic blasted Ron in the chest sending Ron flying across the room, crashing through furniture before coming to a halt out of sight. Harry couldn't even scream properly from the pain that was still racing through his body.

Malfoy laughed while Hermione stood in the middle of the room with tears running down her face. He let the curse go on Hermione and her shoulders slumped. She looked utterly defeated.

"Granger, now it's just you and me...I have waited, so very long for this, and it would be just no fun if you couldn't move." Malfoy stepped forward and slammed his fist into Hermione's stomach. She doubled over with a grunt of pain. The power at which the punch came was enough that the cushioning charms on the shirt overloaded and broke as Harry watched. A small red glow puffed away from the shirt as it faded.

Before Hermione could even pick her head up, Malfoy's fist slammed into the side of her head with a right hook. Hermione spun in a full one-eighty with the blow, her hands failing to keep a grip on the table behind her as she tried to break her fall.

Harry felt like he was going to burn with the fury that was inside of him at this very moment. Hermione was on the ground and Malfoy was approaching her, an enraged smile sliding onto his face. Draco's boot tip snapped forward and slammed into Hermione's side. Harry thought he could hear the snapping of ribs through her cry of pain. Looking at his prey, Malfoy knelt and grabbed her by the back of the head to force her face towards his. "I would promise that you are going to enjoy the rest of the evening, but that would be a lie..." he whispered to her in the quiet of the room.

Malfoy dragged Hermione up from the floor by her hair. He forced her face close to his so they were inches apart. Blood dripped from Hermione's chin and her face was bruised already. Harry could see the profile of her face, covered in blood from a gash spanning across her forehead. Her eyes were wide and the white showed around the edges as they stretched to absorb the horror that was around them.

"You are nothing. Your only value is your ability to hurt him," Malfoy jerked his head in Harry's direction. "The Dark Lord doesn't care about you, he only wants Potter."

Harry realized with utter clarity, that Hermione was about to die, and he was going to have to watch.

Time slowed down and Hermione's eyes locked with Harry's. All he wanted to convey to her in this last moment was how much he loved her.

Her eyes slowly slid back to meet Malfoy's. Then she spit in his face. "Go to hell Malfoy."

Malfoy punched Hermione in the stomach again and threw her to the ground while he turned away to wipe his face.

In the split second of distraction, Harry saw Hermione slide something into her hand. A small hotel key card. Malfoy didn't notice this or the fact that Hermione's hands had started to glow. For a brief second Hermione's hands pulsed a soft golden light before she moved almost faster than Harry could see. In a flash Hermione's hand moved through the air and with a slashing motion, Malfoy's throat opened up in a wave of blood.

Alone in the middle of the room stood Hermione. Malfoy's blood cascaded down her face as the taller blond man grasped at his throat with blood flowing out of it. He dropped to his knees and coughed a few times. Spittle and blood flying from his mouth and the wound in his throat. Draco Malfoy coughed one final time, looked up at Hermione with hate in his eyes, and died.

Silence flooded the room for the first time since they had entered it. Hermione looked down at her bloodied hands, now shaking far too much to hold on to the key card. Her body trembled and shook, her shoulders heaving up and down with gasping breaths.

She looked at Harry.

And then she began to scream.


	11. Chapter 11: Liberosis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thank you all so much for the kind reviews, they make my day when I read them. Thank you so so much.
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> Disclaimer: I still don't own any of this.

**Chapter 11 Liberosis**

\- _The desire to care less about things_.

* * *

Harry immediately pressed his muscles forward and his hands already glowing an ethereal white by the time Harry reached her, he scooped her into his arms. She went willingly now screaming into the front of his shirt. Her entire body was quaking, and Harry knew she was going into shock. Tonks had warned him about this, and he needed to get Hermione and Ron somewhere safe. A short glance made his heart fall, the small boy's body hadn't moved from where he had fallen. There was no rise and fall to his shoulders anymore. Harry was suddenly filled with the idea that he hadn't made the Death Eaters suffer more before killing them.

Harry turned with Hermione still in arms and started running towards where he had seen Ron fall. He slid on his knees next to his friend and felt for a pulse as he had seen Neville do all those years ago. Finding a beat, Harry curled his hand around Ron's forearm and apparated away.

_"I'm so sorry..."_

* * *

Harry's knees met the floorboards of the Keep with a painful crunch. Ron's limp form appearing next to him and Hermione still in his arms let him know that he hadn't splinched anyone. Hermione's screams had not stopped during the painful moment of apparition and suddenly the Keep was filled from floor to ceiling with her terror.

Glass shattered and Harry almost jumped. He turned to see Daniel with a now-empty hand and the remains of a teacup at his feet. "Oh my god...REMUS?! TONKS!?" Harry wished there had been someone else there to find them, Dan's wide eyes locked with Harry's frantic ones for a moment that felt like an eternity too.

Tonks skidded into the room at the commotion, "What happen-Oh FUCK!" Tonks exclaimed.

"Oh my god..." Remus said as he came around the corner and saw them huddled and covered in blood and gore.

"Ron has physical injuries and got hit with a curse I didn't see properly. Hermione is going into shock, she has...physical injuries..." Harry managed to get out the words in a mumble before the darkness closed in around his eyes and he too passed out.

* * *

Harry faded into consciousness enough to hear voices around him.

"She hasn't said a word since they got back. Not a single thing," Jane said, concern woven through her words. "She just keeps staring at her hands."

"Hermione..." Harry was able to mumble before darkness took again.

* * *

Harry's eyes fluttered open fully this time so he could take in the darkness of the room around him. He could see the light pushing into the room around the edges of the curtains. He hoped that meant that he had only been asleep for a few hours.

Remus rose from the chair he was sitting in beside the door. "Harry!" He breathed. "Thank Merlin you're awake. I've been so worried about you. How are you feeling?"

"I don't feel great. Where is Hermione? Ron?" Harry asked, not really interested in his own injuries at the moment. The image of Hermione covered in blood from last night wouldn't leave his mind. He knew that he wasn't going to be able to calm himself down until he saw her safe and well. Ron had looked so still laying on the ground at that moment. The images wouldn't leave his mind.

"They are both alive," Remus said, not elaborating as much as Harry would have liked.

"That doesn't tell me anything Remus," Harry growled fiercely.

Remus studied him for a moment. "Hermione is stable. Madam Pomfrey was able to repair her broken ribs and heal her punctured lung," Remus paused. "Ron is...stable for the moment, but it was very close for a few hours. Madam Pomfrey is still with him now, but she is more confident than she was a few hours ago."

Harry blinked a few times. He felt the moisture pool at the corners of his eyes. He wanted to push himself out of the bed, but he couldn't. He was paralyzed with what had almost happened. The woman he loved and his best friend almost died because of him. If he hadn't been so eager to prove himself...if only...

"I want to be transparent with you so that way you aren't blindsided by any of this," Remus said, trying to catch Harry's darting eyes. "It is going to be a while before Ron wakes up. The curse that he was hit with is slowly working through his body and feeding off his magic. The only way to prevent him from being a complete squib is to keep him unconscious until Madam Pomfrey can work out a counter curse. It could take some time," Remus said softly.

Harry's eyes began to move faster. All of a sudden it seemed like he couldn't open them wide enough. His eyes flicked around the room and words bloomed into his head picking up speed. He felt like he could feel the room around him all of a sudden. Like everything in the world was wrong and it would never be right. His eyes kept moving over and over again through the items in the room.

Door handle.

Clock.

Fireplace.

Ron's screams.

Rug.

Blood.

_Hermione_

It felt hot in the room. He felt like he was burning through his skin and clothes. Ron almost died; he might still die. Hermione was hurt badly. He had led them there. He had failed. He had hurt them.

Remus was in the process of walking over to Harry when the door slammed open. Hermione was in the doorway. She was in a loose-fitting white t-shirt now and sweatpants. Her eyes were still glassy and unfocused but searching.

"Hermione, you shouldn't be out of bed," Remus chided, turning to help her.

Remus got too close and Hermione's head snapped around to meet him. The werewolf froze in place. A wave of magic seemed to form itself in front of her, preventing Remus from getting any closer. Her hands gave off a faint luminescence, only visible because of the low light.

She slowly turned her head back to Harry and walked over without saying anything. Silently, she slipped into bed next to him, curled into a ball, and put her face to his side. She pulled in on herself again and again until she was as small as physically possible before taking in large deep breaths.

The wall of magic dissipated and Remus stared at Hermione in awe.

"Get some more rest, you both look like you still need it," Remus said as his gaze softened when he saw the position that Hermione had chosen to continue resting.

The door clicked shut behind Remus and Harry turned to look at the small form of Hermione Granger next to him. He felt her warmth. Her soft form pressed against him. The gentle puff of her breath on his side as she buried her face there. The smell of her hair and the feel of it brushing against his stubble. Harry reveled in the fact that she was still here, she was still safe, she was still alive. He could still hold Hermione close. These thoughts helped guide him away from panic and despair.

It was a while later when Harry finally broke the silence.

"Hermione?" He breathed. He didn't want to spook her by speaking too loudly.

She turned her face upwards just enough to see him with one eye. "I... killed him." She trembled. "You don't hate me now? After you saw all the blood on my hands?" She shivered and clenched her fists.

"I could never hate you, Hermione," Harry said softly, placing a kiss on top of her head.

"You aren't afraid of me?" Her voice was so very small.

"Never, you were brilliant today Hermione. You saved our lives," Harry said earnestly. The bloody flashes of memories reminded him that they had not been innocent last night either.

"I'm a monster," Hermione said. Her voice sounded raw. The image of her screaming flashed through his mind. "It felt...different this time. Not like Greyback." She fell silent again. Harry waited patiently for her to continue.

"I felt it this time. His blood was on my face...it was still w...w... warm..." She started to sob again and buried her face in his side. With fists clenched in his shirt she Hermione yelled into his chest in frustration and pain. "I can still feel it!" Her words were muffled into his chest but her sobbing continued.

Harry pulled her small form close. Hermione continued to cry as Harry whispered soft nothings into her ear and held her close.

Her shoulders started to still after a few minutes. "Thank you, Harry."

"I love you, Hermione. You could never be a monster to me," Harry said kissing the top of her head.

"I love you too Harry," She closed her eyes, settled into his chest, and promptly fell asleep.

* * *

Harry and Hermione had dozed on and off for a few hours into the evening. The pain of the cruciatus curse had faded after a few hours like it had when Harry had been in the graveyard. The few hours of twitching stinging muscles weren't unfamiliar to him. After they had passed through him, Harry found himself needing to know what was going on. Clearing his mind and napping next to Hermione had been wonderful, but he knew it was time to go.

Hermione mumbled and snuffled as he moved in the bed. He smiled down at her. "I think I'm ok enough to get up and go see what's going on. You stay here and get more rest." Harry said.

They locked eyes for a moment, and she exhaled a long breath. "No, I need to get out of this bed too. I think it will help me clear my head," Hermione said while cracking back a yawn.

Harry nodded. They agreed to meet back downstairs after freshening up. It didn't take Harry long at all to wash up, he felt like it should have been more difficult after the battle that they had been through. It was shocking how much pain magic could inflict in one moment, and take the pain away in another. Hitting the bottom of the stairs Harry rolled his shoulders to loosen up his back that still felt tight. He was sore and his muscles weren't super pleased that he was out of bed, but he didn't find himself struggling.

Hermione came down and they walked into the living room. The adults in the room all turned their heads on a swivel to look at them entering. Harry felt his stomach drop out. Harry realized when he saw all their faces that this wasn't like the times he had come out of the hospital wing before. Those had been times when he had been the victim and met with faces that were excited to see him. This time the three of them had led a complete failure of a mission on all counts and had gotten wounded in the process. They weren't students anymore; they were supposed to be soldiers.

Moody, Remus, Dan, Tonks, and Jane sat in the room and stared them down. Jane came over right away and gave each of them a hug. Harry appreciated it, but he could see the other adults over her shoulder. They were not going to be giving out hugs.

"I'm so glad you are alright, you scared us last night!" Jane said, holding Hermione tight.

"Yes, it is very fortunate that you are all three back in one piece."

The tone at which Remus had spoken was a new level of fury that Harry had not heard before. The words had been kind, but the tone was not. Harry prepared himself for the next part.

"You had, incredibly clear instructions," Remus started. Jane backed away and sat down next to Dan who gave a nod to Harry, that was all.

"Well, when we fi-" Harry started.

"NO!" Remus bellowed. He had lost his temper in about thirty seconds, which told Harry how upset the man was. Remus was not one to be quick to anger. "You were on a WATCH! Do you know what watch means?"

"We watch?"

"Ten points to Gryffindor!" Remus snapped at Harry. Harry flinched.

"You were supposed to sit and observe. If you saw anything, you were supposed to call for backup. Why did you not do as you were instructed to do?" Remus asked. Moody was nodding in the background looking grim.

Harry hung his head for a second. "Because I wanted to fight. I wanted to do more. I wanted to be like dad, like Sirius! I wanted to help and...and I thought I could do it. And by the time I realized we were in over our heads, I had lost the mirror while flying," Harry said, not really knowing what else to say.

Because that's what it had really come down to. Harry had known they should have taken the extra seconds to call for help first. He had told himself that they didn't have time, or that it would have been dangerous while they were flying, but those had all been excuses. So many people had seen him as the Boy Who Lived for so long, they had seen this mythical hero that had saved the day from the bad guy. There had been books written about his heroic deed that had never happened.

And from that day on, Harry had just fallen into one situation after another. Always managing to fumble his way through. Constantly giving his best effort to at least survive long enough to meet some expectations. They saw him as a hero, how could he not want to try to save them? Now, after all those years of things happening by luck, for once Harry wanted to come home as the hero on his own right. He wanted to come back to the Keep with Hermione and Ron as returning heroes from a mission. Harry wanted to actually intentionally be the hero that they needed him to be.

Instead, Harry had come back covered in blood with Hermione screaming in his arms and Ron nearly dead. He hadn't come back as a hero. Harry had almost not come back at all. Being with Hermione these last two months had made Harry want to live to see the war ended. For the first time, he was looking past winning. He had trained, he felt ready, the way his magic was responding was so fluid and natural...Harry had no reason to doubt himself before he left. And that was the problem, now he had the drive to win, but he didn't have any of the experience to accomplish it.

"I'm sorry," Harry said, not able to meet any of their eyes anymore.

"Hermione, I expected better of you as well," Remus said with a strained look on his face.

"Dammit man! They are grown adults not students! I didn't expect better from you two, I _ordered_ better from you two!" Moody barked. "You had orders, and you disobeyed them. Do you think this is a game eh?" He said, his magical eye locked on Harry's face motionless.

"No sir," Harry and Hermione replied in unison.

"Neither of you is to leave this Keep for any reason whatsoever. Your training will continue, but you will not be going on active assignments until I give the all-clear. Consider yourself suspended," Moody growled at them and stomped out of the room.

"Yes sir," they chimed again, this time with remorse in their tone. Harry had known that was going to happen. They had asked to be sent out on this as a test, and they had failed. It might not be school, but there were still tests to pass.

"Where...where is Ron?" Harry asked, unable to contain the question anymore.

"He's alive and stable now, Madam Pomfrey only took a break from working on him recently when she had him stable," Jane said. She had been working with Madam Pomfrey to help with some of the medical preparation and such.

"What happened to him?" Hermione pressed.

"Well almost all of his ribs were broken, but that was fixable. The curse though...Poppy and I are working on some ideas, but according to her, he doesn't have the strength to hold the curse at bay and be conscious at the same time. Right now Poppy estimates that it will take almost two months to process all the way through him," Jane explained.

"Will he be ok when he wakes up?" Harry asked, still unsure of the ultimate fate of his friend.

"We don't really know. Poppy says that the curse usually kills within a few days when the wizard's magic runs out. Tonks, am I getting those terms correct?" Jane asked, turning her attention to the other woman.

"Yes," Tonks nodded and smiled at Jane briefly. "It will depend on how he is in a few weeks when it wears off. He will either be fine, and his magic will recover, or it won't."

Harry felt ill. Ron had nearly died and could end up permanently without his magic because of their foolishness. Not to discount that Hermione and Harry had also almost died as well.

"Remus and I need to know the details of what happened though," Tonks said.

"After you three came back, a few of us went back to the hotel to see if we could retrace your steps. We ended up finding the hotel room without too much problem...I could smell it from quite a way off." Dan and Jane both flinched. "But we don't know what caused...that." This time it was Remus's turn to cast a side glance at the parents in the room.

"Mum, Dad, you don't have to stay here for this," Hermione said in almost a pleading way.

"If you were strong enough to survive it, then I'm strong enough to hear it," Jane said with her voice and jaw set.

"I heard on the extendable ears that the Princess was in the hotel, so followed on brooms when we realized she was leaving the hotel. The plan was to call for backup when we got there," Hermione said succinctly.

"It must have fallen out of my pocket while we were flying. There were some riders tailing the car, we uh...took them out without too much problem. Though we didn't notice the car coming up behind them until it was almost too late. We stopped him from using the gun, but the cars still crashed," Harry said. They had missed the obvious, thinking that it was more complicated than it was.

"It's in all the muggle papers," Remus said. "She passed away after a few hours in the hospital, unfortunately."

"By the time we got close, it was too late for me to do anything. Harry had to stop me and remind me that doing anything magical would have resulted in a gigantic breach in the Statute of Secrecy," Hermione explained, a pained look still on her face from hearing the news about the Princess.

"So you _did_ stop to use your brain a few times then," Remus said, glancing at Harry.

"Ron had stopped the guy in the car already and found that he had been imperioused and threatened. His description was pretty clearly Malfoy." Harry was really feeling the pressure of the eyes of the adults right now. Dan had the most stoic expression of all at the moment.

"Which Malfoy?" Tonks asked.

"He said slick blond hair and an English accent," Harry said with a quirked eyebrow.

"Oh, I didn't realize that Draco Malfoy was the only person in France with blond hair and an English accent. You really narrowed that down quick! C'mon Hermione, I thought we had talked about making assumptions," Tonks said putting her face in her palm. "Did you ever stop to think that it might have been Lucious Malfoy instead?"

"He said short hair!" Harry again defended.

Tonks absolutely scowled at Harry. Her hair shrunk from shoulder height to buzz cut length and then back again. "Because hair length can't change either? Harry, you are smarter than this."

Harry was completely abashed at how completely wrong he had been at every step. He had said he wanted to not go by the seat of his pants anymore, and yet that was still what he had done. "I didn't think of that...but we did turn out to be right?"

"Even a broken clock is right twice a day." Tonks seethed under her breath.

"When we got back to the Hotel, we found Draco, Crabbe, Nott, and Zabini there. We...uh, removed Blaise in the stairwell. He killed a hotel staff woman by pushing her off the stairs before I could get to him," Harry said, mentally recoiling against the memory of the sound of her hitting the ground floor.

"Once we got into the room, we found the others. They had a young boy and his mother kidnapped there. Draco started to torture the little boy and Ron acted," Hermione said.

"Draco held the little boy at wand point, so we had to drop our wands. Crabbe hit me from behind and Malfoy had us under the cruciatus curse. He also bound Ron and me so we couldn't move," Harry said ashamed of how poorly it sounded when they explained it.

"Draco cursed Ron with a purple curse and tossed him aside first. Then he ... hit me for a while." Hermione said closing her eyes at the memory.

"What do you mean 'hit' Hermione? Harry managed to mumble something about physical injuries when you got here, but that was all." Remus asked.

"No, he physically hit me. I think he thought it would degrade me more if he did it physically with his hands, but I turned that around on him," Hermione said sadly.

Jane put her face in her husband's shirt to hide her tears.

"I was in a complete daze, I thought he was going to kill me. Then I saw Harry laying there, knowing that they both were going to die if I didn't do something..." Hermione choked up. "So when I had the chance, I slit his throat with the hotel key card."

Silence.

Dan blinked a few times and Jane even stopped her tears for a moment to look.

Hermione choked up again and Harry wrapped his arms around her. He didn't care if the Order was mad at them. Wrong or not, they still had gone through a truly terrible experience the night before.

"I'm very sorry," Remus said in the softest voice he had used all day. "I wish I could have spared you that."

Hermione nodded a few tears dripped from her nose. She picked her head and met Remus's eye. "I'm not sorry for what I did though. He killed that little boy, I watched him. I watched what he did to Harry and Ron. Malfoy deserved what he got and then some." Hermione looked away and put a hand to the side of her face, tracing the small pink line that was still visible on her skin. "I also didn't like it. The killing... It hurt. Deep down." She locked eyes with Remus again. "I know what you mean now." Hermione's words were thick with emotion.

"I'm sorry you understand." He said solemnly.

"I grabbed Hermione and Ron after that, and came back here," Harry summed up.

Hermione calmly went and sat down next to her mother on the couch and laid her head down on her mother's shoulder and closed her eyes. Jane detached herself from her husband and wrapped her arms around her daughter. Harry smiled at the familiarity of a mother and daughter.

* * *

Friday Septemeber 19th, 1997

The morning of Hermione's birthday started just like the rest of their mornings had started over the past month and a half. Harry and Hermione woke up early, did their stretches, and prepared to start their training with Moody. The training had taken a different shape since Ron had gotten hurt. Their overall strategy had to change with the loss of one of their team. The three of them had always been a unit that did things together.

Since their absolute failure in Paris, Harry and Hermione had more or less devoted themselves to training with every moment of their time. Harry wasn't willing to let something like that happen ever again, and if he had to turn himself into the living embodiment of a weapon, then that's what he would do. Hermione seemed to be of the same mindset. Her moment of panic and indecision in the hotel still weighed on Hermione's mind heavily.

Harry's entire day was spent training in some way. Reading, practicing, exercising, preparing, planning, everything he did was with that in mind. Sometimes late at night Harry and Hermione would take some time for one another and sit in front of the fire for a while talking when they were too tired to do anything more. Harry cherished those times now even more than he did before. Knowing that he could lose Hermione and _seeing_ how thin that line is, turned out to be two different things in Harry's mind.

"So, do you think they will take it easy on you since it's your birthday?" Harry asked as they walked out to the backyard.

"I highly doubt it. In fact, I would imagine that they would do the opposite just to throw me off." Hermione said, finishing tucking her hair into her ponytail. They both were dressed as they usually were. Tight black shirts that didn't restrict their movements and tough canvas pants tucked into their boots.

"Good point, though trying to predict their sparring habits has only ended in pain for us thus far," Harry said as he slid his wand from its holster and felt it nestle into the palm of his hand. "I'm going to try the occlumancy trick again, keep me covered."

Harry closed his eyes for a brief second, letting his sense go slack for a moment. It was a trick he had learned from the Occlumancy book he was reading. As he let things go slack he was able to feel more accurately different magical charges. It required him to be more or less in silence and it left him defenseless for a moment or two. After some discussion with Hermione, they had decided that the risk was worth it.

The concussive wave of magic pressed itself onto Harry like a strong wind. He expected he would only get a small nudge of magical pressure that would give him a general idea of where they were going to come from first. This was different. This was like a tidal wave slamming into him from his right.

Without hesitation, Harry grabbed Hermione's arm and pulled her close to him while he turned and slashed downward with his wand. The matching blade of air that Harry conjured cut through the wall of blue fire. The fire split around them in a wave of heat and washed over the rest of the yard to their sides. The shrubs and a few small trees that lined the edge of the yard fell over a second after the blue light passed over them, all of them cleaved cleanly in half and smoldering.

"They aren't pulling punches today. Not good." Harry muttered, his back pressed to Hermione's back as they slowly turned in circles, facing as many directions at once.

The ground broke into explosions all around them. Rock and dirt flying into the air, the claps of the explosions pressing on their ears in a painful manner. Remus stepped out of the shadows and swept his arm across again and Harry could feel the wave of air and burned ozone before he saw the wave of blue fire again.

"Up and down!" Hermione yelled. Harry didn't even bother responding before he threw himself into motion. With a kick and a blast of wandless magic, he threw himself into the air, spinning on his side. His roll threw him over the blast and that much closer to Remus.

Meanwhile, Hermione had dropped to one knee and tucked in on herself. The blast passed over her as she pointed her wand at the ground at her feet. The rippling wave of power that shattered into the ground was something that would have tripped Harry up easily if he hadn't still been spinning in the air while she did it. It was like a small subterranean explosion of power. The ground literally rippled away from her as a stone dropped in a pond. The waves of dirt and gravel washed away from her and negated any of the explosions that had been seeking their way towards them. As the ripples spread further away from her they did get weaker, but the power level that they started at was so high that it didn't much matter.

Harry landed back down on the ground just as the ripples passed below his feet. The timing of this particular move had taken some time for them to get right, many times Harry had landed too soon and had come down on top of the ripples, which sent him flying rather painfully. The blast of wandless magic that sent him into the spin turned out to be quite useful in keeping him airborne long enough for the blast to pass underneath him.

As he landed the ripples rushed towards Remus sending him sprawling as they cracked the ground beneath his feet. Harry sent a stunning spell his way and it caught the older man perfectly off guard as he was still stumbling trying to regain his footing. He slumped to the ground, their rules saying that he was out of the fight for now. The assumption was that in a real battle, the threat would have been terminated.

A spiral yellow curse flew out from the other side of the yard. It traveled incredibly fast compared to usual spells, they weren't deadly, but they could cause a fast breach in your defenses because it was so accurate. There wasn't going to be enough time for either of them to dodge it. Sure enough, Hermione was able to sidestep slightly, but the curse rocketed into her left shoulder regardless of how fast she attempted to get out of the way.

Her yelp of pain as she spun to the ground sent a flicker of rage through Harry. He attempted to calm himself the best he could, but the barrage of spells that he sent toward that part of the yard where Moody was shimmering into view was a strong indication of how he felt about her getting hit.

Hermione was going to need a bit to get back on her feet. The spell was going to make that whole side of her body lose feeling and spasm. The spell had been designed to knock broom riders out of the air without necessarily killing them instantly. There had been plenty of instances of drunk broom riding that had ended with them flying through the streets of different non-magical towns causing chaos. This was an effective way of getting them out of the air without knocking them completely unconscious.

She was able to throw up a weak shield that stopped a few of Moody's follow up spells, but long term, Harry was going to be her defense while she was down. He leaped through the air, Moody's spells tracking him through the air but missing him as he spun himself with more wandless magic.

The parlor tricks that he had started to get control over had become fairly useful over the last two months. He wasn't able to do giant waves of magic from his fingertips, but he was able to use it reliably enough to be of use to him in situations like this.

He landed on his feet in front of Hermione and threw up a full-strength _protego_. "You ok?" Harry asked.

"Yeah, just give me thirty seconds and I'll be back in. Can you buy me that?" Hermione said as she struggled to lean herself up on her good side.

"Yeah as long as Moody is the only one here," Harry said nervously. A number of angry red spells fired from the other side of the lawn and Harry flicked his wand at the ground and transfigured it into a solid wall of earth that took the impacts without a problem.

_"Homunum Revelio,"_ Hermione said. "I think it's just the three of us, I'm not finding anyone else nearby."

"Good," Harry said as he lowered the shield and started firing curses as fast as he could at the older man.

Moody was more than able to defend himself though. His shield charms snapped into place faster than Harry could slam them back down. The brute force Harry was putting into his spells was causing Moody's shields to crack instantly on each hit, but the man was fast enough to replace them faster than Harry could slide something through to hit him. While this was frustrating, it still had the desired effect of keeping him too busy to strike out at Hermione or himself.

Since the summer and the potions had washed their way out of his body, Harry had been practicing with how much power he wanted the different spells to have. He found that there was a fine line between too much power and too little. If he put too much into each spell, then there was a really good chance that he would tire himself out far before the fight was over. If he put too little into each one, then he would end up having to cast more spells to make up for the lack of power. Both situations ended the same way, with him not being able to finish the fight with anything left over. There had been a few times that they had won their sparring matches, only to find that there was another match waiting for them afterward where they were soundly beat since Harry was out of energy.

Hermione was almost back on her feet as Harry finished another wave of his own chain spells. "I'm back in Harry. Reel it back before you tire yourself out," she said from behind him.

He grunted in agreement, the last chain had managed to clip Moody to some extent, and thus the fight moved into the second segment like it always did. Now was the part where Moody would become incredibly mobile for a while, trying to catch them off guard. It wasn't so much of predicting his strategies, this was more a rule of their sparring matches. If either of them was able to clip Moody in any way, then he would pretend that that combatant was out of the fight and move on to a new type of threat. The small series of cracks indicated that Harry was right.

"Alright Hermione, _snap crackle and pop?_ " Harry asked using their code name for something they had been practicing recently.

"I hate that name, go on three."

Harry pointed his wand at the ground and cast a non-verbal spell that resulted in a dome appearing around them. Much the same as Harry had created the day Hermione had been attacked, but this one was intentional. Hermione spun her wand around them a few times muttering a string of Latin under her breath. This idea they hadn't tested in a sparring match yet and they were going carefully rather than speed. Harry had a feeling that the oddity of it would buy them the time that they wanted. A mist began to fill the dome obscuring the walls of it so they could no longer be seen from the outside. Like a fogged over window, they were now effectively out of sight.

Harry flicked out a small device from his pocket. It was a small compass. They had gotten them from the twins some time ago but hadn't found too much use for them here as they would have wanted. Right now, it was perfect. The compass face was an open-ended _point me_ spell. "Moody" Harry whispered, the compass responded, and the needle spun around a few times before settling to their left.

"Left, Hermione. Ready?"

The spell that fogged their dome had the downside of blocking their view somewhat as well. It was easier to see out of the dome then it was to see in, but they hadn't figured out how to get around that problem quite yet. Regardless, Harry could see the sudden change of color. The enormous blue fireball that was rocketing towards them was clear even through the fog.

"THREE!" Harry yelled, spinning on the spot and apparating.

Hermione did the same and they both disappeared with small pops of displaced air as the dome faded and the smoke billowed out into the yard. A second later the yard was full of snaps and cracks as the pair appeared and disappeared at rapid speeds, only stopping long enough to fire off another curse or two. The speed and the fact that there were two of them was their advantage over accuracy in this case. While pinpointing where the older man was would have been easier, covering the area worked just as well in this case all the while making it to where they didn't have to worry about shield charms.

Harry and Hermione each counted out twenty different apparitions and then stopped on the far side of the yard behind the older man who was sweeping back and forth looking for them to land. Their assumption of his position had been correct in this case and their wands bucked in unison with stunning spells that rocketed toward Moody and flipped him through the yard landing near Remus.

"That…worked really well," Harry said breathlessly.

"It really did," Hermione said tossing her ponytail back over her shoulder nonchalantly. "When you suggested it the first time, I honestly didn't expect it to work that well."

Remus at that point was striding over to them, having come to and helped Moody to his feet. "You didn't expect it to work that well because it shouldn't have been possible at all." He said brushing off his shirt.

"Aye, moving that fast shouldn't have been possible. I have never seen anyone materialize and dematerialize that fast before. Much less fire a spell off in between." The man nodded in respect.

"I didn't think we were doing anything that unique." Harry shrugged.

"Ever wonder why no one has ever apparated into a wall?" Remus asked.

"Well I assume because you pick your destination and no one would do that to a wall," Harry responded.

"Yes, but what it someone built something there since the last time you knew the place? Or what if someone was already standing in the spot where you wanted to go?" Remus continued. "There is a moment where the magic takes effect and makes sure that what you are doing is possible at all. Splinching is when you can't hold on to that 'check' in your mind and the magic goes wild. In this case, with a yard, this size, the chances of you two choosing the same place to apparate to was pretty high."

"Did either of you predetermine where you were going to do that?" Moody asked.

"No, it was supposed to be random enough to not be predicted," Hermione said, sliding her wand into its holster.

"It shouldn't have been possible for you two to move in sync with each other at that speed. The magic should have collided somewhere and one of you wouldn't have been able to apparate." Remus said proudly. "These are the kinds of things that are going to win this war. Your parents would be proud of you Harry."

"That's enough for today. I don't like losing, I'm used to sparring with people that follow the bloody rules of the fucking universe," Moody said starting to stomp away. "Happy birthday lass, you've done well even if you did cheat!" He called over his shoulder as he disappeared into the Keep.

After the pair had showered, separately, they settled down in the library to do some reading. They had not made a lot of progress on finding the Horcruxes, they had a list of places they wanted to check though. Their reasoning of not going yet was that they wanted to get as much training from Moody as they could before setting out and trying to find the bits of Voldemort's soul that he had scattered around the world.

Ron having been injured had thrown their plans for a bit of a loop. They spent a while with him every day, watching the steady rise and fall of his chest. Madam Pomfrey said it would still be a while before she could safely take him out of the coma, but that didn't make it any easier to watch. Harry sat at his side and silently apologized over and over again, hoping that his friend would snap his eyes open and ask how the Cannons were doing. Harry and Hermione had decided that they wanted to wait out the suspension before doing anything else and hope that possibly Ron would wake up in time, but it hadn't happened. The suspension had given Harry and Hermione an excuse to pause. What happened in Paris hadn't left them yet and even though they said they were waiting to be respectful of Moody's orders, they both knew they were still too shaky to go on another mission.

Harry's frustration though was now building. It was September and they hadn't made any clear moves to get rid of any of the Horcruxes. He understood the need to train and the other things that had come up over the summer, but that time was past, so why weren't they trying to do more now?

"Hermione, I really do think it's time for us to at least try to gather a few of these. We have some decent ideas on where he might have hidden these things, it's worth checking out at least," Harry said, plucking up the courage to start up the conversation yet again.

"Harry, we have been through this. None of the leads are solid enough to go after. Remember, some of these places are places straight out of Voldemort's childhood. If we go to any of them, correct or not and we get noticed, the game is up. Once he knows we are looking for these things, he will move them, and we will never find them. This entire plan is predicated around the idea that we are doing this in secret. The second we show our hand in the slightest we are through." Hermione said exasperatedly. She was frustrated with Harry's instances that they should be doing something, anything to try to find the damn things.

"But people are out there dying Hermione! Ron is laying in the other room, still unconscious because of what they did to him, and I feel like I'm here doing nothing," Harry said putting his face down on the table in defeat. The conversation was truly an impasse. Both of them were right in their own way, which is what made it so frustrating.

"I know this is getting to you Harry, I do. If I had thought of a way to do this where we would be doing it in perfect secrecy, I would have us there in a heartbeat. The problem is that we don't have any way of knowing where or when he is watching our movements." Hermione said circling the table to place a hand on Harry's back and make small circles in an attempt to comfort him.

"Do you trust me?" Hermione asked, emotion strong in her voice.

Harry looked up from the table and met her stare. He could tell she was feeling bad about how upset he was about the situation. "Of course I do, more than anyone. And I know in my head you're right, but that doesn't make it any easier to ignore all my instincts about this." Harry said, taking her hand in his.

"We don't want to make those mistakes again," She said softly. "We are going to do better this time, you'll see."

"Alright, let's go over the list one more time. It makes me feel better to keep going over it." Harry said, leaning back in his chair. Hermione shoved his chair back onto all four legs and moved towards a different section of the giant table.

"Right," Hermione tucked her hair behind her ear and bent over the notes she had in front of her. "Number one, the diary. Most likely his first Horcrux created, while he was at school with the murder of Myrtle. Destroyed by you. Number two, the ring. Probably his second, created just after leaving school and tracking down his parents, created by the murder of his father. Destroyed by Dumbledore." Hermione winced at the mention of what the Headmaster had gone through to destroy that ring.

"Number three, the locket. The timeline gets fuzzier here, but it was probably created sometime after he managed to get access to the cave again. No telling who he murdered for this one. Taken and _possibly_ destroyed by R.A.B. whomever that is," Another grimace, this time from both of them.

"That is going to grate on my nerves until we figure it out," Harry said annoyed.

Hermione nodded. "Yes, we still need to do some more research into his followers at the time. By their use of the term "Dark Lord" says to me that they were a follower that learned too much and turned on him."

She glanced down at the page again. "Number four, Helga Hufflepuff's cup. Created after Tom was working for Borgan and Burkes, with the murder of Hezbetha Smith. Location is unknown. Number five, something of Griffindor's or Ravenclaw. Created sometime around the time when Tom Riddle asked for a job. Location and actual item, unknown."

"We know what it isn't though," Harry said. "The sword of Griffindor isn't one, neither is the Sorting Hat, those are the most famous of Griffindor's relics."

"True, I imagine that it is something to do with Ravenclaw, but that is just a hunch. We haven't dug into the details of her past yet. This is the most unattainable Horcrux at the moment since we don't know what, when, or where." Hermione continued.

"Number six, Nagini. Created after his resurrection with the murder of Bertha Jorkins. Located wherever Voldemort is and still alive. I imagine that when we confront him for the last time we will have to kill Nagini in that fight. Killing her early would result in not only him knowing we were up to something, but also give him a chance to create another Horcrux. Number seven is currently located inside of Voldemort's homunculus."

The body that he had created for himself was much larger, but they had speculated that he was probably much weaker for creating it. The body itself was just a shell in a human type form.

"Alright, and do we have any hunches on where the missing pieces are located?" Harry said, knowing the answer, but letting Hermione's words wash over him in the hopes that he would see something he had missed thus far.

"Locations of interest are Godrics Hollow, the Orphanage he grew up in, Sherwood Forest, Loch Ness, Bran Castle, Poenari Castle, and Hunyad Castle."

"The three castles are all linked to the legend of Dracula, right?" Harry asked, not having read the stories when he was younger. The stories though had made their way into History of Magic a few times.

"Yes, they are all part of the non-magical legend. They are only half legends though. All three castles once were homes of large Covens of Vampires. Much like the story about the shrieking shack being haunted because of your father and Remus, these castles aren't haunted or the places of anything supernatural. However, there was a hint of truth to the stories since Vampires did live in them at one point or another." Hermione said, again sliding another bit of parchment across the table to Harry. The notes were much more detailed, listing the years that the Covens had occupied the castles and why they had left in the subsequent years.

"You have listed here that Bran Castle is now a museum open to the public," Harry said putting his finger down on the name.

"Yes, at this point in time, it is one of the only places I would feel comfortable scoping out beforehand. We could polyjuice and go fairly unnoticed." Hermione said sucking her lower lip in between her teeth in worry. "I just don't know what will happen if we find something. His traps have been incredibly violent thus far. There could be a lot of loss of life if we aren't careful." Images of the hotel room flashed through Harry's mind.

"Even if we are careful and he does have something hidden there, then succeeding in getting to it will involve setting off the trap in some way. So far from what I can tell, none of the Horcruxes have been retrievable in a way that doesn't set off whatever self-defense he left on them." Harry said thinking back to the black shriveled look that Dumbledore's arm had taken on last year. "What I still don't understand is, Dumbledore managed to hunt around the country to find the damn things and Voldemort was none the wiser. Why can't we do the same?" Harry asked, still frustrated by the situation they found themselves in.

"Simple Harry. We aren't Dumbledore. He had a command and understanding of magic and more importantly Voldemort's magic, that we just don't have yet. It's unfortunate but true. What he was able to do with finesse, we would stumble through." Hermione said with caution in her tone. "The other difference is, Dumbledore still had his cover as headmaster to hide behind. Voldemort knows we aren't at the school anymore. Which means he's going to be looking for us."

"Right," Harry said tiredly. "Which is why I can't even go to Godrics Hollow and visit my parents' graves. They are almost certainly set with some sort of trap for me." Hermione nodded and reached out to take his hand.

"I'm sorry Harry. We will figure it out, I promise."

They spent the rest of the afternoon reading and doing more research on the three castles in Transylvania. The chances that something was hidden in them was small, but it fit the profile of what Voldemort stood for. They were a bit out of the way as far as locations go, but they weren't far enough to be struck from the list. Harry sincerely hoped that Voldemort hadn't bothered to go all the way to America or Australia to hide one of the bits of his soul. Though when Harry checked a map to where the current day Bran Castle was located, he realized that it wasn't all that much further away than Albania had been.

Albania was one of the other mysteries of this Horcrux search. It had been clear that one of them had been hidden there since that is where Voldemort had gone after he had failed to kill Harry. Wormtail had also gone there to find him before fourth year in order to help with the ritual of bringing him back.

There had been other Horcruxes closer to Godrics Hollow the night his parents had died. For whatever reason, he had traveled all the way to Albania and hidden there for a decade before making his travels back to England at all. Something didn't add up with the story. If Lucius had the diary the entire time, why didn't Voldemort go to him and demand his help to get a body back? It would have been much faster, and he could have pursued finding Harry much earlier. Harry shared Hermione's concerns that there was a missing piece to the story.

The day passed rather quickly, Hermione's birthday coming to a nice close with a quiet dinner with her parents. Remus stopped in to wish her well, but the full moon only having been two days past, he was still weary. Their sparring match earlier that morning hadn't helped his recovery from his transformations.

The evening wound down without too much fanfare. Which is what Hermione had requested. Their friends were at Hogwarts and there was too much they needed to be doing to worry about birthday celebrations. It had been fun to celebrate Harry's since it had been his seventeenth birthday, but at this point in time, turning eighteen didn't matter much to her. Harry respected that and didn't plan anything ostentatious for her. Hermione had never been one for big displays such as that. Though he wasn't going to pass up the opportunity to buy her a present.

"Come on, I have something I want to show you," Harry said smiling. "I know we didn't do a lot to mark your birthday this year," Hermione tried to interrupt him, but Harry ignored her. "But I wanted to do something for you anyways, lemme show you."

Her chocolate eyes twinkled in the firelight. "Lead the way."


	12. Chapter 12: Onism

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hello everyone! I hope everyone has had an awesome week! My wife again did an amazing job on this chapter, she helped the clarity really come out and I couldn't have done it without her. We are closing in on the end of Part 1! Chapter 14 is currently the end of of Part 1, so we are super close. This chapter isn't full of darkness, but it does have some darker themes mentioned.
> 
> If anyone is looking for an amazing discord community to be a part of that celebrates all things Harmony, hit us up! /gqVECPJ
> 
> Many many thanks to all my new friends on the discord that have been pushing me to keep writing and keep improving my skills. Can't thank you all enough!
> 
> As always, I don't own any of these characters, but at least I get to live in their world for a little while.
> 
> Enjoy!

**Chapter 12**

**Onism**

**The frustration of being stuck in just one body, that inhabits only one place at a time.**

* * *

**Friday, September 19th, 1997**

Harry took Hermione's hand and led her down the hall and to his bedroom. "Where are you taking me, Mr. Potter? This is very forward of you!" she giggled as she followed him to his bedroom.

"I had something else planned, but if you would rather…?" Harry said waggling his eyebrows at her.

She rolled her eyes at him and smiled. "On my birthday? No no, that's far too stereotypical. You'll just have to live in suspense," she grinned wickedly back at him.

Over the time they had been together, they hadn't discussed their physical relationship very much. They were both fairly comfortable with where they were at now, so they didn't discuss it further. On the one occasion the subject had come up, they had both just decided that they would tackle that when it felt right. Since the pressure had been taken off, they had both started to feel more comfortable joking about the subject and teasing one another light-heartedly. They knew that times were strange right now, and trying to decide on how to "properly" pace a relationship like this was difficult at the best of times.

Without the pressure of their peers all around them, they found the need for certain conventions of dating to be completely irrelevant. There were no pressures on their first date since they never really had one of those. There was no worrying about what people would think if they "caught" them. They were both functioning as adults and neither of them felt beholden enough to anyone to even care about what they thought. There were no snide comments from jealous teens or drama or gossip. Without those pressures, all that left was to focus on one another and move at their own pace.

"Alright, what is it you wanted to show me?" she grinned, sitting down on the bed. She was loving the suspense.

"Well, in a lovely turn of fate, I found something while researching and now I get to surprise you with it!" Harry said smiling.

Hermione raised her eyebrows in shock. "Oh really? In what subject?"

"Us."

Hermione just stared at him blankly. "I don't…."

"Don't you think it's strange how all of a sudden weird things have been happening since I visited your house this summer? We thought that some of these changes were from the potions, but that just didn't seem right to me. The shield at your house, our Patronuses? The shield you formed that pushed Remus away the day we got back from Paris?" Harry asked, pacing back and forth now.

Hermione followed his pace back and forth with wide eyes and a shocked stare. "Before you go on, I just want you to know, I have never found you more attractive than I do right now."

Harry blinked a few thoughts away from his mind, trying to focus on anything else other than what Hermione had just said. It was difficult.

"I found a book that described this theory. It's just a theory since no one has been able to prove the phenomenon exists, but the author strongly believed it was possible. From what I could gather from this book, it was from a journal that was sporadically written in by a previous employee in the Department of Mysteries before they memory wiped him of his employment." Harry said, trying to think back over the notes he had written for himself in the past few days.

"His theory says that every person has a magical fingerprint so to speak. Some people call it aura, some people call it soul, but it's all the same thing. Dumbledore talked about it before. It was one of the ways that he was able to sense Tom's magic in the cave that night. If you can leave a trace of yourself behind with the magic you cast, then there is something deeply personal with the spells you cast that is far beyond incantations written in a book." Harry continued his pacing while he talked.

Hermione shivered on the bed and ran her hands up and down her upper arms. "Sorry, this is just so, uh, lovely, that it's making me all tingly."

"Right so, the idea was that, if a person's magical fingerprint was something that could be identified after they cast, there might be a way to determine someone's magical signature without them casting anything." Harry turned and faced her. "The last thing he wrote about in the journal was speculation that if two magical signatures were close enough together, they could harmonize in a way. If there was a strong enough bond between two magical individuals, there would be the possibility of the signatures overlapping," Harry said to Hermione, who was hanging on his every word.

"Almost as if there weren't two people trying to use magic. The signatures would be so close it would be the equivalent of both people's magic being available to the other," Hermione breathed.

"Exactly, but he never found anyone to test the theory on. And since some of the arithmancy in the book is way beyond me, I have to trust his math. But his notes said the chances of finding two people like that in a geographic area was nearly impossible. And the chances of those two people having a close bond, even slimmer." Harry was now sitting on the bed next to Hermione.

Hermione looked astonished and completely baffled by what Harry had just said. "Here, watch," Harry said, and he reached his hand out in front of himself, palm up, and let his mind focus on what he wanted. With nearly no effort, motes of magic swirled in his hand, and before their eyes, a rose bloomed from bud to flower in his hand. Harry gently placed it behind her ear and kissed her forehead.

"That's very pretty and impressive Harry, but I don't know if that proves anything," Hermione said with a smile while she took the rose out of her hair and inspected it.

"No, it wasn't that impressive," Harry said and took her hand this time. If he was right, this would work. If not it would be kind of embarrassing. "This might be though."

With his free hand once again outstretched palm up, he let his magic go. This time he concentrated on how happy he wanted to make Hermione, and how much he cared about her and cherished her. A faint glow climbed up their joined hands and again motes of golden magic swirled around Harry's hand.

And then it burst forward in a swirl of wind and magic. The golden sparks of light flew through the room and before their eyes an entire flower garden grew to life around them. Lilies, roses, sunflowers, daisies, and tons that Harry didn't even know existed. Like a video on high speed, the flowers sprouted and grew from vines that spread around the room with reckless abandon. When the spell was done and the golden light had fled from the room, Harry and Hermione were left sitting in the middle of a magical garden of Harry's creation.

"I think, Hermione, that we are stronger together than we are apart. Way stronger than we even knew," Harry said as he cupped her cheek and leaned in for a tender kiss.

Hermione pulled back with sparkling eyes of love and tenderness. Then she smiled a big smile. Hermione reached out her hand and spread her fingers. Golden magic swirled again and bursting into life all around them were small songbirds. They flitted and flew from flower to flower around the room singing all the while. Harry had to laugh at the hilarious site of his room transformed into an entire aviary.

"This is wonderful Harry. Thank you so much. Exploring this all with you hasn't always been easy, but I wouldn't do it with anyone else. I do have one quest-"

Harry interrupted her by just handing her the book that he had been referencing. "Here you go, dear."

"How did you kn-"

"Because I love you. Happy birthday Hermione."

"I love you too Harry. Thank you."

Harry made to stand up from the bed but Hermione tugged his arm back and pushed him down onto the bed. "I didn't say you could get up yet. And it's my birthday so I'm in charge."

Harry grinned widely. "See, this is the kind of authority I _can_ respect." Hermione's eyes twinkled at the joke. Harry could feel the pull on his cheeks. "Do you want me to tell you more of my _theories_ and discuss..." he paused "...your homework assignment?" Harry tried to say it in the smokiest voice he could muster but the laughter bubbling inside of him was almost too much.

Hermione bit her lip trying not to laugh. She lost the battle and they both burst into peals of laughter, Hermione falling to the bed clutching her side. "Damn it, Harry! Do you really think that my pillow talk is about notes and homework!?"

Harry felt his stomach start to pull with how hard he was laughing. "I don't know Hermione, do you expect two feet of "parchment" by the morning?" Tears were leaking out of his eyes as he gasped it out.

_"Two feet?!"_ Hermione choked out while covering her eyes and rolling back and forth laughing.

Hermione was barely able to breathe between laughs as she pretended to punch Harry in the chest. Harry tickled her in response while they laughed. Eventually, Harry rolled himself over and looked at Hermione. She rolled to face him as well. They just smiled at one another for a long moment, enjoying one another's presence and happiness.

"I love how you make me laugh," Hermione said, reaching out and tapping the tip of his nose.

"And I love that you're my best friend," Harry said before reaching out and pulling her into a kiss.

* * *

Sometime later Harry and Hermione looked up from the bed when they heard a slam from downstairs. Their hair was quite disheveled and Hermione's shirt was more than wrinkled. They had been thoroughly distracted. Harry stood from the bed when there was another slam and the sound of yelling. The flowers and garden were still all around the room twinkling with ethereal lights.

"Do we have to go down there?" Hermione asked while she tucked her hair back behind her ears.

"Yeah, I think so," Harry sighed.

Hermione muttered to herself as they ambled down the stairs to find Remus and Mr. Weasley together in the kitchen.

"Is everything alri-" Harry stopped mid-sentence. It was clear by the postures and facial expressions of the older men that things were not alright. "Who died."

"A student was murdered earlier this evening,"

"What!?" Hermione whispered sharply. Her cheeks had rapidly gone from the nice rosy color from a few minutes before to a pale sheen.

"Tonks got the information to me as soon as she could. The Slytherins that are from Death Eater families have eyes and ears everywhere. She has a hunch that they have a few of the younger students under the imperious curse," Remus said with a haunted look in his eyes. Harry imagined that hearing this happening to kids in school all over again was hard for him.

"Who died Remus?" Harry repeated, still shocked.

"A young fourth year from Ravenclaw. Her name was Sally Jones," Arthur said somberly.

"Do you know who did it?" Hermione asked pointedly.

"No, but…whoever did this is truly a monster and a danger to the kids in the castle," Remus said.

Hermione covered her mouth and turned away.

"Where did you find her?" Harry asked, trying to push aside the rising feeling of sickness in his stomach.

"She was strung up in the Great Hall. Each hand tied to one of the house banners, her throat slit. They hung a sign around her neck. It only said…"

Hermione interrupted him. "Mudblood. It said mudblood didn't it?" she said, horror and disgust in her voice.

Remus nodded. "They did it sometime before dinner. The entire Slytherin house is 'accounted for' according to them. Slughorn is, of course, falling all over himself trying to figure out a way to not do anything about the situation. He is still afraid of what their families will do to him if he rats anyone out."

"He's still a fucking coward," Harry ground out between clenched teeth.

"Tonks seems to think that there is something larger going on in the school. She has been keeping a close eye for the last two weeks and she is pretty convinced that there are already plans in play that we are missing," Remus said.

"Do you need our help?" Harry said, glancing to the side to see if Hermione was composed enough to contribute to the conversation.

She wasn't.

"I'm not sure there is anything you can do. McGonagall has given Tonks permission to treat the DA as a security team more or less as long as they are older than fourth year. Some of the students got pulled out already by their parents. The Patil twins left the school with their father a few hours after the incident. Their father was looking for an excuse to take them home anyway," Arthur said, looking concerned. "There will be others I'm sure."

"How many members of the DA does Tonks have left?" Harry asked, trying to do some mental math in his head.

"She would be proud of you for asking that, Tonks trained you well," Remus said smiling. He pulled out a bit of parchment and glanced at it. "There are thirty-seven members left. Only twenty of them are fifth year and older." Harry did some more math.

That wasn't quite enough to cover the entire school with patrols all day and night. "Are there any Slytherins that could go either way? Maybe some that aren't as devoted to the Death Eater kids?" Harry asked, trying to think of ways to get more information out of the snakes.

"The Greengrass girls are as close to that as I think we were going to be able to find," Arthur said after thinking for a moment. "I've met Mathias several times, and he was a very level-headed man."

"What do you mean 'were?'" Hermione asked, composing herself enough to participate again.

"Well, Ms. Jones was the younger sister of one of the Hufflepuff girls who made some disparaging comments about Riddle where the Slytherins could hear her. Word is, the attack was retribution for those comments," Remus said with disgust riding in his voice.

"So you're saying that we aren't going to be able to convince Daphne or Astoria to do anything to help us because they'll each be worried for the other sister?" Harry asked.

"Correct. I think before this we might have been able to get some help from them, but with them, inside the dungeons, like they are, I doubt we are going to be able to convince them to help us," Remus said. Before the school year had started, they had all gathered to make a list of students that needed to be kept an eye on because of their family ties. The first few Order meetings that Harry had been a part of had revolved around this subject.

Harry wasn't sure what to think at this point. If some negative comments about Voldemort were enough to murder and hang a fourteen-year-old girl in the Great Hall then he wasn't sure if he could convince anyone of anything. That kind of fear was…palpable. The entire school was going to be roiling from this for a while. Moreover, there were going to be a lot of students that would shy away from confrontation now just to try to protect themselves or someone else. Remus had been right. This was the way that Riddle took power the first time. The kind of crippling fear that left most people without the strength to fight back.

"In any case, you two should get some sleep, and I mean sleep and nothing more," Remus blanched as he heard what he had just said. "We are going to go back and discuss with the Headmistress if the school is even going to remain open," Remus said locking eyes with Harry sadly.

Harry nodded and he and Hermione left the room. Harry was about to open his mouth to say something before she put a finger to her lips and jerked her head towards the stairs. Harry realized that it would be wise to get out of Remus's hearing before saying anything.

Hermione's parents had gone to bed so the pair of them slipped back towards Harry's room on silent feet.

Hermione closed the door. She turned to Harry and their eyes met. Her stare hardened into determination and her jaw set. "Tomorrow we are going to go to that museum and check if anything is there. I won't let another life be forfeit because I hesitated."

The conviction in her voice was like fire. Harry felt emboldened by her passion and almost intimidated by its ferocity. "We also ran in half-cocked and made a mess of things," Harry reminded her, feeling like he needed to reel in his knee-jerk reaction to jump to action. They had made so many mistakes on their last mission by rushing and not thinking. Harry felt uneasy with Hermione's seeming recklessness.

"This is bigger than the Order and their rules Harry," Hermione said, her voice imploring him to support her. "We are talking about the entire war, not just what one shadow organization is doing. Dumbledore gave us the keys to winning the _war_ _._ This is bigger than our insecurities."

Harry stared at her and blinked a few times, absorbing what Hermione Granger had just said to him.

"Go wake your parents up. Tell them where we are going. If they don't hear back from us by afternoon, they should tell the Order where we went," Harry said, nodding and stepping closer to her to take her hands in his.

She smiled a determined smile. "We can sketch out a plan-"

"Then get an hour or two of sleep and head out before sunrise," Harry finished for her.

Hermione let go of one of Harry's hands and brought it up to touch his cheek. "Thank you for having my back."

"Always," Harry said and smiled before they shared a quick kiss and Hermione fled his room.

* * *

**Saturday, September 20th, 1997**

The Castle itself had been a tourist attraction since the 1950s, but they had only recently finished with a new round of renovations. According to Hermione's notes, there had been a very diverse set of people that had owned the Castle over the years. The fortress had changed hands nearly a dozen times since the 13th century. Although it had been renovated several times, it had remained more or less the same structurally since it was built. The renovations completed a few years prior may have been the most significant changes it had undergone since the 1950s when it had been first converted for public use.

This brought up several concerns for Harry and Hermione. If Voldemort had used Castle Bran as a hiding place for one of his Horcruxes, then he most likely would have done it after the time when it was a museum in 1956. The problem was that now that renovations had been done on the castle again, there was a possibility that it had been discovered and moved by someone not knowing what it was, or that it was hidden further in some way by the renovations. Either way, whatever clues they were going to be looking for could either be completely obstructed or lead them to a Horcrux that wasn't even there anymore. The only consolation at the moment was that the renovations had been done before Voldemort's resurrection, hopefully falling below his notice.

Despite Hermione's research, they both still felt that they were going in more or less blind. They had tried to find some layouts of the castle, but the books that they had managed to find in the library of the Keep (some of which had been taken from the Black library at Grimmauld Place), were all quite out of date and certainly didn't take into consideration any of the new work that had been done in recent years.

What the books did tell them, though, was that there had been a number of Vampire Covens that had used Bran Castle as a home for many different stretches of history. Thus, many of the non-magical stories of Dracula and vampires came into play. It had been noticed by muggles and wizardkind alike that the castle had some unsavory tenants in its time. Wizards just had a clearer understanding of who and what they really were.

"You know I wonder if the Order's informant would be able to give us any information about this place?" Harry asked as he cinched his belt a notch looser. The time spent working out and training his body the past few weeks had already done some work to his build. The usual place that his belt had fit him didn't seem to want to work anymore due to the swelling of some more tone muscles.

"I'm not sure," Hermione sighed. "I wish we had more time to ask those kinds of questions, but we just...don't."

"I know," Harry said, frustrated still that he was instantly breaking his word to Remus, but Hermione was right.

He just sighed and continue to shrug into his gear. They were traveling light. They also had to look like they blended in. Some of the items, of course, were easier to hide than others, but they managed to look like a normal young couple taking a tour of a historic site. They had drunk some aging potion to give themselves a few years. Not too much, just enough to avoid looking obviously underage in the non-magical world. The small batches of potions that Hermione had been making were proving to be more and more useful as time went on.

Hermione reached out to hand Harry something small. "Here, put this on. It will add to the disguise," she said simply.

Harry took the small object from her which turned out to be a small golden ring. Harry raised an eyebrow. "Don't you think it's a bit soon for this? Besides, you didn't even ask!" Harry said, feigning shock.

She giggled in response. "Just put it on you dolt. We are pretending to be the newly married Weaver family. George and Julie." Hermione slid a matching ring onto her finger.

The sun was rising over the horizon and Harry realized it was time for them to be leaving. Hermione's parents had gone back to bed for a few extra hours of sleep after wishing them luck.

"Ron is going to be mad he missed this," Harry said, smiling.

She chuckled as she finished tightening her boot. "Remember how mad he was after we told him about the Time-Turner?"

"Oh yeah. This will be worse."

"We'll have to make sure we have a good story for him at least," Hermione said. The unspoken implication was that their friend would indeed wake up eventually.

Harry looked around the room and shoved a few more tools of the twins' into his fanny pack. "It's time." Hermione nodded and they slipped down the stairs and out the front door in silence. Once past the wards around the Keep itself, they disapparated with nearly silent displacements of air.

The tour group they found themselves in was a smattering of different types, but mostly middle-aged couples doing some sightseeing. There appeared to be a few history buffs that were there doing research, but for most of the group, it seemed to be a casual outing. Harry and Hermione didn't have too much trouble blending into the crowd. They smiled and introduced themselves to the small group.

"Muffliato," Harry whispered, quietly waving his hand between the two of them. The muffling spell worked instantly, but Harry still kept his voice low. They had fallen to the back of the group and were pretending to look at everything with interest. In fact, they were only looking for anything that would alert them to some kind of magical presence.

"For the most part, the things here are all furniture of some kind. Nothing too interesting or out of the ordinary," Harry whispered.

"Well, I disagree about it not being interesting, but besides that, I haven't noticed anything strange," Hermione said nodding to him and smiling. Just because no one could hear them, didn't mean that they were invisible as well.

Harry smiled at the fact that, no matter what, Hermione was up for learning something new. "He wouldn't have hidden it in any of the main parts of the castle, but there would be something to give it away I think," Harry conjectured, looking around again.

"Make sure you are looking at the portraits closely," Hermione cautioned before canceling the muffling spell.

Harry hadn't thought about that. Any of the pictures on the walls could easily be hiding something- a spy even. Harry highly doubted that they were the first wizards to visit this spot in recent years though, so he didn't have any reason to think that their magical presence would set anything off on its own. As they walked down another interior hallway Harry made special note to observe the pictures they were passing. So far only a few of them had people in them at all, and from what Harry could tell, there was nothing out of the ordinary about them.

As they turned down a new hallway and the guide started telling them about Vlad the Impaler who had once resided in the castle Hermione nudged him hard in the ribs and gave a pointed look to their right. A portrait on the wall was of a stern-looking man with long mustaches that hung down the sides of his face. The placard underneath the portrait indicated that this was a picture of the infamous Vlad. At the bottom corner of the brass plate, though, there was a small deformity that wasn't like the other pictures so far. Harry stepped closer and squinted his eyes. Sure enough, it was a small snake carved into the brass twined into the shape of an 'S'. Voldemort was nothing if not consistent with his arrogance.

"Here, flick this into the rafters over there where the group is about to turn." Hermione handed him a small disc-shaped object from her pocket. Harry obliged and with a flick of his fingers the Distracto Disc was stuck to the top side of one of the rafters. A small green light emanated from the top of the disc, and as the group ahead walked under it, not only did they pass through a Notice-Me-Not charm, but also a mild Confundus. It would allow Harry and Hermione to slip away from the group without anyone remembering that they had been with them in the first place.

Once the rest of the tour group was out of sight, Harry flicked his wrist and felt his wand slap into his palm in a comforting way. As he walked closer to the portrait Harry forced himself to pretend that the snake carved into the plate was real. " _Open_ ," he hissed, letting the parseltongue flow out of him.

The snake twitched almost so slightly that it was unnoticeable. Yet a second later, part of the wall seemed to melt away and reveal a staircase leading down. As the pathway fully formed the torches ensconced on the walls leading downward flickered to life with a disconcerting green flame.

"His flair for drama never ceases to amaze me," Hermione said as she observed the hallway while rolling her eyes.

Harry frowned. While the snake and the green flames did seem to indicate that this was something of a Slytherin motif and certainly something that Voldemort might do, it gave a vastly different feeling than the cave had given him when he had searched for the locket with Dumbledore. The locket had been hidden and protected, but the sense of danger had been incredibly clear. They hadn't gone down the stairs yet, but the sense of danger wasn't there yet.

"Be extra careful. Something doesn't seem right to me," Harry said as they took the first few steps down the passageway.

Harry and Hermione continued down the narrow staircase into the flickering green belly of the Castle. The passageway had turned quickly into a spiral staircase that disappeared from view almost immediately. Nevertheless, wands out in front of them, they walked down the stairs at a slow pace, keeping an ear out for sounds both above and below them. They were fairly sure they weren't being followed, but until the wall had reformed behind them they had remained perfectly silent. Harry wasn't sure how they were going to activate the secret passage again if they needed to leave by the same means, but he would cross that bridge when he came to it.

"Something doesn't feel right Hermione, I mean it," Harry said as they continued down the stairs.

"I'm feeling it too. It's like someone tried too hard to make us think that this had something to do with Slytherin or Voldemort," Hermione said, nodding in agreement.

"I've told you about the cave. It wasn't decorated or interesting. It was rough, functional, and screamed danger. This doesn't have the same feeling," Harry said, flicking the tip of his wand and silently casting Lumos.

The beam of light from his wand seemed to be absorbed by the flickering green flames, but it did add a little clarity to their steps at least.

"Despite how much I'm feeling like this is a trap, there isn't much we can do but check it out anyway. All his hiding places are going to be traps of one form or another." Hermione sounded decidedly frustrated. Trying to find something hidden in a trap and walking into something you knew was a trap was an odd combination of frustration and wariness.

The staircase finally led out into a small chamber. They had walked down for about five minutes, so they were a decent ways below the castle now. The room they found themselves in was about the size of the Dursleys' living room. While the smell of damp air was noticeable, it wasn't as strong as it should have been for a passage this deep in the earth, which led Harry to believe that there was another way out that led to fresh air. A good sign.

The green torches still flickered throughout the room giving enough light to see, but, due to the color of the flames, not very clearly. Not wanting to give away his position too much, Harry flicked his wand slightly and the light at its tip went out. He kept the wand in his hand though. Just in case. Even in the dim light, it was easy to see that there were two doors, one going to the left and one going to the right.

"Well, which direction do we go?" Harry asked, glancing back and forth between the different doors.

"Well, considering there is a nice layer of dust all over everything, except the area in front of that door over there," she gestured toward the left, "I would imagine that we would want to follow whoever was here recently."

Again, the feeling of it being too clear and too easy washed over Harry. The fact that they were in some sort of antechamber for the underground passageways seemed clear enough, but that is what made Harry uncomfortable. It all appeared to be too obvious.

"Something isn't right. Don't go through the door yet," Harry said, holding up an arm to halt Hermione's advance to the door.

"No no Harry, I'm sure this is the way," Hermione said confidently as she took a step to pass by him.

Harry furrowed his eyebrows, watching her expression as she made to step around him.

"Hermione, what's going on?" Harry asked, but she didn't answer. Just kept moving toward the door. As she got closer, her movements started to become more and more mechanical. It was starting to look as if her legs were twitching into place rather than walking naturally.

Harry reached out his hand quickly, halting Hermione's stride. She froze a few steps before the door. She started to topple backward and Harry stepped forward to catch her. Working on a hunch, Harry flicked his wand upward toward the stairs sending out a feeler with his magic trying to sense something he had missed with his eyes. Sure enough, a few stairs upwards from the bottom landing, just before they twisted out of sight, one of the flagstones glowed a faint orange. It pulsated slowly, its light clashing with the light from the torches.

Harry narrowed his eyes. Hermione laid still, her weight supported easily by one of his arms. The only thing moving was her eyes flicking back and forth. Harry muttered some counter curses and while he wasn't able to disable the stone altogether, he was able to release the hold that it had on Hermione for the moment. Removing the curse completely from the entranceway was going to require more rune work than he was familiar with.

"Hermione, I'm going to let you go now," Harry said, bringing his wand arm around her gently. She blinked a few times in recognition.

The body bind lifted, Hermione stirred in his arms. "You know, I don't mind having to be held by my boyfriend for a little while in the middle of a dangerous mission," she teased.

"There are worse things," Harry said with a smile. "But for the moment we need to get rid of the hex on that stone." He gestured to the glowing flagstone behind them.

Hermione nodded and pulled away. Taking a few strides over to the stone she knelt to get a better look without touching it. She used the tip of her wand to draw a few runes in the surrounding stones. The runes seemed to burn into the stone for a moment before glowing bright blue and then fading into the rock like ink absorbed into a sponge. The stone seemed to react to the runes being drawn around it, flicking through a few different colors before fading back to the dull grey color of the other stones.

Harry watched approvingly, once again regretting that he hadn't taken Ancient Runes or Arithmancy in school when he had had the chance. Divination seemed like a whole waste of time in comparison to how often Runes would have benefitted him. Hermione stood and turned around with a satisfied look on her face.

"I changed the ward that was embedded in the stone. Rather than a compulsion charm, it now will signal to us if someone passes over it. I figure any other Parselmouth passing through here isn't someone we want surprising us," Hermione said with a grimace, knowing full well who the only other Parselmouth in magical Britain was at the moment, but not wanting to say it directly.

"Brilliant. Now, let's find out what the wards on this door are. I imagine they aren't anything we want to trigger since the compulsion charm was trying to send you straight to them." Harry approached the door, giving it a wide berth.

Hermione strode over, wand out, and cut a few runes into the door frame, a similar effect happening on the wood of the frame as the stone of the stair. This time, though, the runes didn't fade into the wood. They remained visible even after Hermione had finished an entire string of them. Then they started to glow and change colors. They cycled through blue, then red, finishing in yellow a few times before fading.

"I imagine that the colors meant something to you?" Harry asked. She shot him an of-course-they-do look and turned back to the door.

Another few flicks of her wand and a set of fiery runes appeared in the air in front of her. To Harry's untrained eye they all appeared the same, but they glowed a different set of colors in rotation. First orange, then green, finally finishing in a bright purple. Even though Harry had been mainly paying attention to Dudley and his gang in primary school, even he knew that those colors were the complementary colors of the original rotation.

Hermione pushed her wand forward and Harry felt a surge of magic from her as the burning runes flew forward and sunk into the door itself. There was a cracking sound and a faint blue wall of light appeared around the door. Then the glowing blue surface appeared to shatter into a thousand pieces, falling all around them and dissipating into the air.

"That was a triadic rune scheme," Hermione said. "You may have recognized the basics of color theory in the cast."

"Yeah, I remember that from primary school," Harry replied.

"Exactly. Color theory is one of the ways that non-magical people can sense magic on the periphery of their senses. Complementary colors that 'look' good together, a color wheel based on that 'feeling' that they get from the colors and how the eye perceives them- it's all connected to magical theory, especially runes. Triadic color theory says that if you pick three colors from equal points around the wheel, then they will complement one another. It's called Triadic Harmony," Hermione explained. "I used the opposite triad to cancel out the original curse."

"Have I ever told you that you are scary smart sometimes?" Harry said, completely impressed with her knowledge of the subject.

She walked over to him with a smile on her face. "Yes dear. I am very glad that my third year understanding of runes impresses you." She patted his cheek with a supercilious smile, mirth twinkling in her eyes. She kissed him on the cheek and walked over to observe the other door in the room.

"Do we want to go through this door now that it is safe?" Harry asked.

"Oh, Merlin no. That room is filled with poison gas," Hermione said without turning around.

Harry blanched and took a step away from the door. He turned and strode across the room to catch up with Hermione. She was examining the door in front of her, although she hadn't drawn any runes yet.

"I think this door is more promising. There don't appear to be any outward traps on the door itself," she murmured, sensing his presence next to her.

"I'm not so worried about the door itself. I'm more concerned about what is on the other side. This place really doesn't have the same kind of feeling that the cave did," Harry repeated.

"I know. But we have come this far. We are going to have to take some risks," Hermione said.

"I can't help but feel some role-reversal going on here Hermione. I mean, isn't it my job to tell you to take some risks?" Harry said, a smile quirking at the edges of his mouth.

"Well, usually," Hermione said, only half-listening. She waved her wand thoughtfully over the edges of the doorframe. She nodded to herself as she finished her inspection. "This door is clean."

Harry reached out and took the door handle. He trusted Hermione's assessment enough that he swung it open without hesitation. The room beyond was much the same as the one they were standing in. This room, however, looked like it had been used recently. There wasn't nearly as much dust built up on the furnishings here as there was in the entrance chamber.

Before stepping into the room, Harry reached out with his hand and waved it across the expanse of the room. A small swirl of wind blew through the room and suctioned in the eddies of dust. This also had the added effect of creating a physical stir in the room that would set off any physical traps or enchantments that were waiting for them. After the swirl of magic had run its course in the room everything fell completely silent and still.

"Looks like the room is clear," Harry said. Hermione nodded in agreement as he stepped into the room. Once inside, sconces on the walls ignited to life with flames. These, however, were not green like the ones in the entranceway and on the stairwell. These were normal warm flickering flames.

The room seemed to be a large sitting room with chairs and lounges set around the room. The walls were lined with low benches for extra seating. The layout of the room indicated that everyone would be looking at the same thing if they were all sitting at the same time. The front of the room had a small raised area that was lifted only a handspan off the rest of the floor. The dais had a few torches to itself and was well lit. Harry could tell that if you turned down the other torches in the room but left the ones bright in front, the people in the chairs would be cast into shadow.

A feeling permeated the air in this room. While the outer room had given Harry the impression of someone that was trying too hard to intimidate or force a motif, this room did not. The decorations and furnishings here weren't done in such a way as to draw attention to anything in the room except whatever was on the dais. Most pressing on Harry's senses, however, was that the room seemed to reek with fear. The air seemed somehow to be soaked with terror, anger and misery. It was now that Harry started to feel the same way he had felt in the Chamber of Secrets. The air was rank with something dangerous.

"Dark magic was done in this room," Hermione said, echoing Harry's thoughts.

"I agree. It feels… tainted here somehow." Harry was torn. He felt like he was missing a huge section of the puzzle. Like there was something he wasn't thinking of that was right in front of him. The same way that Moody had yelled at them time and time again to not make assumptions, there was something in Harry that was screaming for him to pay more attention, but for the life of him, it was escaping him.

Harry walked along the back wall of the chamber next to the low benches. He ran his hand along the edge of them and realized that they weren't a uniform shape. He looked down and the shape became instantly clear to him, the bits of the puzzle that he had missed suddenly falling into place.

"Hermione, did we do any research on if there were currently any covens here?" Harry said slowly, backing away from what he now recognized as a coffin.

"No. I honestly just assumed with the museum here, they would have cleared out by now," Hermione said as she turned around from where she kneeling by one of the chairs. "Why?"

To answer her, the door slammed shut with a crack that resonated around the room. "In fact, the museum upstairs has been providing us a plentiful feeding ground for quite some time now," a silky voice said from the shadow that was now hanging thick around the door.

A tall man stepped out from the shadow into the low flickering light of the room. He was well over three meters tall, looking down his sharp features at Harry like a spider would his newest catch. He glanced for a moment at Harry's outstretched wand with disdain. To Harry's credit, the wand didn't shake, but in his mind, he was verging on panic.

"Put it down child, you might hurt someone with it." The Vampire's sneer grew and his eyes danced manically in the torchlight.

"Not us of course, but you might hurt _someone_." A new voice came from the shadows behind Hermione. She spun on her heel pointing her wand at the newcomers.

Fangs dropped down out of the mouths of the two female vampires and the male facing Harry. Harry started running through different strategies and scenarios in his head only to realize that he was woefully ignorant about Vampires other than the half-remembered basics Remus had taught them in third year. Before he had much time to bemoan the situation, the tall Vampire drew two half-meter long knives from his sides and lunged forward with inhuman speed.


	13. Chapter 13: Keta

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Alright folks, here is the next chapter! We are in the slide to the finale of part 1! I can't believe we are already 100k words in. My wife did great work on this chapter and we are both pretty happy with it! I know last week was a bit of a cliffhanger, this week isn't so much a cliffhanger but a tease of things to come.
> 
> The next chapter is...well it's massive. I have been warned repeatedly by my wife that if I make the chapters too long she can't keep on schedule. But this next chapter is worth waiting for the entire thing rather than split it up. So we are going to bust our humps on it this week, but it might be a day or two later than usual.
> 
> All the most thanks and appreciation for all my friends on the HMS Harmony Discord server. You are all the most encouraging friends I think I could ever have made and I appreciate you all so much.
> 
> Special thank you to the Th3Alchemist and Invieri for their help making a better summary for this story! (make sure to check out their stories!)
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own any of this. The story is mine, but the characters belong to JKR

**Chapter 13:** Keta:

_An image that inexplicably leaps back into your mind from the distant past._

* * *

**Saturday, September 20th, 1997**

Everything started happening very fast to Harry's eyes. The speed at which the vampire moved toward him revealed the immortal as having more supernatural abilities than eluding death. Harry barely dodged out of the way of the whirring blades rushing towards him. Hermione reacted a bit faster than Harry to the sudden attack. A banishing charm sent one of the couches flying toward the two females, throwing them back for a moment and giving her some time to gain her footing.

Harry, on the other hand, was straining his senses just to roll and dodge the vampire's slashing knives. It only took half a minute for him to have slashes on his upper arms and sides. He tried Hermione's tactic of banishing different furniture at the tall man, but it appeared that the element of surprise was past and the vampire was prepared for such attacks. Everything that Harry threw at him either exploded when it got close or it was cleaved in half by the strokes of the knives in his hands.

Harry fired blasting hexes and any offensive magic he could, thinking that even if they didn't do any harm they would at least cause his opponent to dodge. This was a failed experiment as the whirlwind of sharp danger just let the spells slam into him without being slowed. The flashes of magic lit the room as Harry and Hermione dodged and spun, magical blasts of force giving them boosts to stay just ahead of the lightning-fast vampires.

Harry tucked and rolled to the side, coming up on one knee behind one of the coffins. He pointed his wand at where he assumed the vampire would charge through next. A mental call for the severing charm and the slick blue beam shot out of his wand slicing from left to right across the room. The beam crossed the vampire's path right across the midsection where a thin red line bloomed to life. No blood spilled out but Harry hadn't expected it to. A look of surprise blossomed on his face and his top half toppled backward while his knees gave way.

Not waiting for even a blink, Harry turned to find how Hermione was fairing. To her credit, she had transfigured one of the broken bits of wood into a sharpened stake and had a shield charm in place on her wand hand. The combination gave her a look of an old-style gladiator with sword and shield in hand. The two females that she was facing were fast but they weren't quite as fast as the man. If Harry had to guess, he would say that they were younger.

Harry threw his magic into the fray hoping to give Hermione some breathing room. The entire confrontation thus far had only gone on for a shade more than a minute, but between the danger and the adrenaline, it was starting to seem like an eternity. Both females danced away from Harry's blasts of magic, giving Hermione the space to fire off the concussive wave that Moody and Remus had used the day before. The wave of blue fire surged forward and Harry could feel the magical power of it echoing through the room. For a moment there was a look of surprise on the faces of the female demi-humans. The second of hesitation was all Hermione needed. With a forceful wave of her wand, the stake in her other hand flew forward as if fired from a cannon, pinning the smaller of the two females to the wall behind her with a crunch.

Her eyes grew wide and a scream ripped from her mouth as her body shattered into a thousand pieces, the stake having pierced her heart perfectly. Her companion screamed in rage and flew towards them, having successfully ducked under the wave of magic only by the barest centimeter. Hermione, having just finished her wand movement by the time the vampire charged, didn't react in time.

With a grunt, Harry pushed Hermione to the side with a blast of wandless magic and stepped into where Hermione would have been. With no time to dodge, he thrust his shoulder forward hoping to break the female's momentum. She collided with Harry with approximately the force of a small car. Her slight build had belied how much the impact was going to hurt and Harry wheezed as the air was thrown from his lungs while they flew through the air crashing into some furniture before coming to a halt across the room. He felt pangs of pain from where he assumed there were fresh bone fractures.

"Enough!" The silky voice of the male vampire called from across the room. "Mathilda, I am disappointed that you allowed your sister wife to be slain by this child."

The female vampire, apparently named Mathilda, unceremoniously yanked Harry from the pile of rubble that had been a couch and held him by the back of his neck. The tall male vampire was standing on the other side of the room holding Hermione close to him with a knife held to her throat. Shock and anger rippled through Harry. The only sign of the damage that he had inflicted on the dark creature was the torn robes hanging at his waist. Without a stake through his heart, the Vampire would be able to recover. He had hoped that cutting him in half would have given Harry more time. Now though, Harry could see that the knife was pressed tight enough against her skin that a small line of blood was starting to drip down her neck.

"Child, first we are going to kill your friend here and then we are going to drain her of lifeblood while you watch. You have sufficiently angered me." The man said, his eyes glittering with hate as he stared down Harry. His eyes had faded to complete black. A few times Harry saw his eyes flick toward the drips of blood flowing down Hermione's neck, the obvious hunger taking hold of him.

Harry felt his entire body tingle, a warmth spreading through him like fire through his bloodstream. Recognizing the wave of force within him, Harry leaned into it, accepted it. Without taking his eyes off of Hermione, Harry took his hands away from the cold feminine hand holding his neck in a death grip and extended one to his side. Mathilda was yanked away from him with nearly no resistance and a white sphere appeared around her.

She levitated off the ground, lifted by the bubble surrounding her entire form. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see she was struggling and screaming but no sound came out of the sphere. Harry took a step forward and closed his hand into a fist. The bubble shrunk down to the size of a marble crushing everything inside completely. Harry was working on pure instinct at this point and letting out the magic that was racing through him. His wandless magic thus far hadn't been that powerful, just an additional tool to use in small situations. This kind of output was something else entirely. Instead of continuing to fight the vampire, he had simply removed her from existence.

The older vampire's eyes widened in a shock that was mirrored in Hermione's face as well. Harry's other hand reached forward and the vampire was blasted away from Hermione, the knife being flung uselessly to the side. He tumbled through the room, coming to a halt in the rubble that had been the small living space. Hermione fell to her knees, her legs failing her. Harry rushed forward, the magic pulsing through him humming in his mind, begging to be let free.

"Are you ok?" Harry asked, hurriedly reaching out and helping her to her feet again.

"I'm fine. Let's finish this," she responded, rolling her shoulders back and setting her jaw. She reached out her hand and from somewhere in the rubble her wand flew out and slapped into her palm.

The pair of them turned as the vampire was getting back to his feet. While the dark beings were more or less immortal, they could still be hurt. Their bodies had still once been human, still suffered from many of the same restrictions that a normal witch or wizard would suffer from. Just not the part about dying. His body might have stitched itself back together after the damage that Harry had done, but he was weaker for it.

He snarled and threw himself at the pair of them without any further discussion. He had toyed with them thus far, underestimating them and losing two of his coven in the process. Harry imagined that after hundreds of years spent with someone, the attachment was bound to be strong, and for half a thought, Harry felt bad for him. Then he realized at the same time, he didn't care. There was a void of apathy inside of him where he had expected to find some sort of emotion.

Years of being pushed around by his Aunt and Uncle. Years of being bullied by his cousin without any adults stepping in to take care of him. Years of being mistreated and uncared for seemed to curtain off the rest of his emotions from feeling bad for what had once been a man. The overwhelming feeling he was left with was that the creature before him had threatened to hurt Hermione. He had held a knife to her throat and if his magic hadn't responded to that in some way, the vampire would have killed her and made Harry watch. Any semblance of mercy or control seemed to have vanished at that moment.

"Push!" he said to his side. Instantly Harry and Hermione flew apart from one another going different directions. Blasts of wandless magic directed at one another propelled them across the room. Hermione skidded to a stop on the balls of her feet next to the wall and didn't waste a second before laying down a barrage of spell work that put the vampire on the defensive, now realizing that the humans could wound and kill. The flashes and streams of blue and red cracking from the tip of Hermione's wand were intimidating. The steady concussive blasts rocketing away from her came from gritted teeth and hard expression.

Harry had purposely pushed himself a bit harder hoping to beat the vampire speed for speed. He didn't have a natural ability to move as fast as the vampire, but he was going to do his damn best. Having thrown himself across the dungeon-like room with enough force to slam him into the wall, mid-flight he turned himself so his feet were facing the wall. When he made contact with the wall, he buckled his knees and braced himself for the barest of milliseconds, then blasted himself away from the wall, this time hurtling himself straight at their attacker. As Harry flew away from the wall he thought he heard the wall crack under the strain.

Hermione slowed her spellwork for the barest of seconds, giving the vampire pause to see why she had stopped. He turned to see Harry flying directly at him at the last second before Harry slammed into him. They tumbled to the floor, but not as hard as Harry had hoped. Once again the dense strength of the immortal surprised him. They rolled a few times, and Harry tucked his knees in and placed his feet on the vampire's chest. With a mighty shove, Harry kicked him away, slamming him into the wall. He landed spread-eagled against the stone and before he had a chance to react, Hermione snapped out binding spells that held him there.

White bands of magic encircled each of his hands and feet. He hung there as if crucified to the wall itself. Realizing that he was held immobile, he started to snarl and spit at the two teenagers, each noise betraying his lust for bloody vengeance.

Harry stood and brushed himself off. Dust, wood, and stone chips fell from his clothes, which were now quite worse for wear.

"I'm not sure how long these bonds will hold him," Hermione said, keeping her wand leveled unwaveringly.

Harry nodded. "Do truth serums work on vampires?"

"Yes, the potion still works, just not for as long as it would on a human," Hermione answered.

"You filthy mudblood! You have no idea who you have angered this day," the vampire snarled out.

With a flick of her wand, a silencing charm fell around him and the sounds of his hate and anger disappeared, leaving them in an eerie silence.

"Did you bring any Veritiserum?" Harry asked, breaking the silence.

"I didn't. I'm sorry Harry, I didn't think we would need it. I brought blood replenishing potions and some other healing supplies, but nothing for an interrogation."

Harry looked around the room hoping to find some answers in the wreckage that was all around them. Near his boot a small end table had fallen over on its side and cracked, spilling the contents of what had previously been a hidden drawer. Harry leaned down and picked up what appeared to be a ledger. He opened it, hoping to find something inside that would give him some leverage against the vampire in the absence of truth serum.

He was not prepared for what he found inside.

The first page was filled with static images. They weren't moving images like most wizarding photos. They looked like they were taken from Polaroid cameras. The images ranged in detail, but all featured the same thing- a young girl no more than fifteen or sixteen. Across the top of the page what Harry assumed was her name was written in red ink. The first page just read _Bethany_ across the top. The second page, however, told a much different tale. Wizarding pictures filled this page, images of the same girl, but treated in the special potion to make them move. The page seemed to tell a story of its own. At the top of the page, the images of the girl fought against the sides of the frame, desperation written across her features and tear-stained cheeks. She raged and railed against the edges of her two-dimensional prison in vain.

As the images continued down the page, her cheeks took on a more gaunt appearance, her eyes changing from terror to desperation to misery from image to image. Finally, the last image on the page was her standing perfectly still in the center of the frame staring ahead blankly blinking from time to time, but nothing more. The blank expression in her eyes chilled Harry to the core.

The dais in the background of the image was quite obviously the one that was in this very room. What made the final image more unsettling was that she was dressed in a provocative outfit and had makeup painted onto her face. The grimy clothes from the previous pictures were nowhere to be seen. Next to the final image, there were some words scrawled in the same red ink as the previous page.

**Beth**

**Age: 16**

**Half-blood**

**Untouched!**

**Price: 1,500 Galleons**

**Sold to,**

_Antonin Dolohov_

The meaning of the ledger immediately became very clear to Harry. He dropped the book as if it was fire, not able to bring himself to look at the images of the other girls that most likely filled the book. His skin crawled and rage roiled inside of him. Thoughts of what had happened in this room swirled in his head, mixed with the thoughts and grief over the death at Hogwarts.

Hermione was saying something to him, but the blood was pounding in his ears far too hard for him to hear anything other than the boiling of his own rage. He rose his head and slowly met the eyes of the vampire pinned to the wall. Questioning him was no longer necessary. There was no Horcrux here. This had just been a place for Voldemort's minions to participate in their crass disregard for human life. Harry's heartbeat with what seemed like the thrum of magic in the room. Power seemed to flow in and out of him with each breath. Swirls of blue and white swirled around his feet and ascended to his hands. Like motes of dust from around the room, Harry seemed to draw in the raw magic.

This is what he was fighting against. This is what his "destiny" had poised him for. To fight _this_ evil. To fight this monster that would rip the world apart for his own images of perfection and purity.

Harry's eyes burned into the vampire's. " _Legilimens_ ," Harry growled without moving his hand from his side. He didn't have much of a frame of reference for how to perform this branch of magic, only the experience of having Snape mind-rape him over and over again the year before. Harry simply willed the magic to work the way he desired and a second later he had burst into the creature's disturbed mind.

At first, there was a sensation of resistance. Harry swept it aside like he would a spiderweb, ripping through the vampire's mental defenses. Memories flew past him like a slide reel, blurring faster than his "eyes" could keep up with them. He found that he didn't actually need to see to understand them. Impressions of what the memories contained pressed on Harry and he sifted through for what felt like an eternity to find what he was looking for. Once he had located it, he stopped the blurring memories and entered the one he had sought.

_Bethany stood on the dais in the room, staring blankly at the opposing wall. Not seeing the room full of men with their cloaks pulled up to hide their features. It appeared that even these men, the worst of humanity, felt somewhere deep down a level of shame for what they were doing. Enough to want to hide their faces._

_"Sinclair," a man from the front row said in a silky voice. "You have done well. Where did you find this newest specimen?" Tom Riddle said in a calm voice that showed a disturbing amount of appreciation._

_"Her family was visiting the area and 'lost' her during their evening outing," Sinclair said from the other end of the room, unfolding himself from the chair he had been sitting in. His tall form seemed imposing in the low light of the room, fangs showing briefly as he smiled at the praise._

_"Dolohov, I know you have a penchant for blondes. Does she appeal to you?" Riddle asked, turning to another cloaked man in the room. While everyone else in the room had pulled their cloaks up, Riddle didn't seem to care and he sat in his black robes quite comfortably, face exposed._

_"Yes, m'lord. I think she will do well for tonight's entertainment," the gruff voice of Antonin Dolohov said from his seat._

_The memory blurred a bit as Harry had seen all he needed to. The last thing that remained clear before the image faded away was a single tear rolling down the young girl's face, silently falling to the floor._

Harry found himself in control of his own body once again only to realize he had tears in the corners of his eyes. Her sense of resignation and the destruction of her spirit echoed inside of Harry in a way that he couldn't quite express in words. There was true evil in this world, and a bastion of it was pinned right in front of him.

"Sinclair. You can hear me now I trust," Harry said, surprisingly calm for how he felt on the inside. Harry waved his hand and the silencing charm faded from him.

Blood dripped from his nose and the corners of his mouth. Harry's entrance into his mind hadn't been done gently. Sinclair merely hung his head in response. Whether he was incapable of making words anymore, or he was choosing not to was of no real concern to Harry.

Again without moving, Harry swung a wave of magic at the vampire's head, slamming it to the side with the crunch of a broken jaw.

"I asked you a _question_!" Harry screamed and swung his arm, slamming his fist hard against the other side of the vampire's head like a troll's club. Hermione had made her way to his side now, confusion etched onto her face. It was clear to her that Harry had seen something, but what she didn't know.

" _Answer me!_ " Harry bellowed, shoving his hands forward and slamming the monster into the wall further. The stones creaked and cracked with the pressure that Harry was placing on the vampire's body. Bones started to grind and Harry heard the snaps and pops of joints exploding in place. Harry's rage was unbounded. Every part of him screamed for an explanation, a reason.

Again the vampire said nothing to defend himself. Harry realized that Sinclair was likely not able to respond. Legilimency was a dangerous form of magic and Harry knew from experience how painful those intrusions could be. His rage was not satiated yet though. Tears fell down Harry's face, belying how strongly he was feeling the plight of the girls that had gone through this room. His frustration at the fact that he was probably in the range of thirty years too late to help the broken-spirited girl was almost too much to take. She had just been right there in front of him. It had felt so real and immediate despite being a memory from long ago.

"Let him go, Hermione," Harry managed to choke out.

The bonds dissipated and seemed to take Harry's rage and energy with them. The Vampire slumped to the floor, his eyes rolling back in his head, drool mixing with the blood that was leaking from the corners of his mouth. His body collapsed into a strangely contorted sitting position, the shattered and cracked bones unable to hold the dead weight of his body. Harry sank to his knees and with a weak flick of his wand this time, a shard of wood flew out of the piles of rubble and impaled itself deep in Sinclair's heart. Sinclair's mind was so broken that his face didn't even change in expression as the stake penetrated him and his body crumbled into shards and exploded throughout the room.

Harry remained on his knees in the middle of the destruction of the room. Cuts and bruises aching, small rivulets of blood dripping down his forehead to mix with the tears that were streaming down his face.

This was what Dumbledore had protected him against all these years. Misguided and unhelpful though it had been, Dumbledore had understood these horrors more than most. And he had desperately tried to shield Harry from them until his last moment. Harry realized this wasn't about saving the wizarding world or even Britain. It was about every last person who had been hurt by this monster. That had suffered at the hands of his followers. They deserved justice, even if they had already died before they could see it done.

For the first time, Harry realized that the pain he had faced in his life because of Voldemort was nothing in comparison to what some others had suffered. Hermione knelt next to him, whispering soft words of comfort despite not knowing what had him so upset. She didn't ask, she didn't pry, she just was there.

And that was enough.

* * *

The crack of apparition in the yard outside the Keep seemed to echo off the house and the trees in the bright afternoon light. They had instructed Hermione's parents to tell the Order where they had gone if they weren't back by mid-afternoon, and since the sun had barely crossed its zenith, that hadn't been necessary. Harry felt like it wouldn't have been the end of the world for more people to know where they had gone. They had only managed to escape the dungeon by luck and desperation. The unexpected expenditure of magic on Harry's part had left him completely drained. That, combined with the crashing feeling from the lack of adrenaline in his system, left Harry almost too exhausted to walk.

Hermione looked worse for wear. The small cut on her neck had been easy enough to heal, but in the course of the fight, they had both taken some pretty bad hits. Harry had a few cuts on his arms and back where he hadn't dodged Sinclair's knives fast enough. Hermione had a number of bruises that were starting to blossom on her forearms and face. The female vampires hadn't had weapons, instead of relying on their superior strength and their teeth to do the work for them. Luckily for Hermione, she had been able to avoid the latter at least.

They had yet to discuss what had happened in the room at the end or what Harry had seen inside Sinclair's mind. Harry was incredibly grateful that she hadn't asked what he had seen. While he had been inside the monster's mind, Hermione had taken a quick look at the ledger that Harry had dropped. She had concluded what his anger had been about, but the expression on Bethany's face was only in Harry's memory.

The front door of the Keep burst open to show a _very_ angry Remus striding out onto the lawn to meet them.

"Just where in the name of Merlin have you been!?" Remus growled in a tone that spoke volumes. Worry, fear, and anger all resonated in his voice.

Harry felt incredibly relieved to see the man. Truthfully, what had happened today had scared him. It had almost been his and Hermione's last mistake. And Harry would have made that mistake without telling Remus why. Harry realized that once again, a Potter had vanished without leaving Remus any explanation. The shame washed over Harry like a tidal wave.

Meeting Remus halfway to the house, silently he wrapped the man in a hug. Harry felt Remus tense and could almost sense his confusion. "I am so so sorry Moony," Harry said, finding himself emotionally spent all of a sudden.

"Sorry?" Remus said, confused.

Harry didn't let the man go. He wasn't even sure if he was strong enough to keep standing on his own. "I tried to be like Dumbledore, but I'm not. I'm not him. I'm just...so sorry." Harry knew he wasn't making much sense but the words seemed to trip over themselves. Flashes of the girls in the book raced through his mind. Hermione standing stock still with a knife to her throat. The vampire's broken expression while he slumped to the floor with a shattered mind.

"Harry, what happened?" Remus said, now sounding concerned and bringing a protective arm around Harry's back.

Harry released his hold on Remus and took a step back. "We shouldn't have left without telling you about it. I broke my word. I thought I didn't have a choice, but I realize now I do. I do have a choice."

Hermione stepped up next to Harry and put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

Remus looked to Hermione expecting some kind of explanation. He did a double-take, finally realizing their physical condition.

"Come on inside. We'll get you bandaged up and you can tell me what happened," Remus said, steering Harry towards the house.

"Before I do, can you please send an owl to the other leaders of the Order? I need to speak to all of you. There isn't anyone else I can trust right now," Harry said, allowing himself to be guided to the house with Hermione right behind him.

"Harry, you're starting to worry me," Remus replied with a questioning stare.

"Dumbledore kept secrets. I am not Dumbledore. I'm done keeping secrets."

"Are you sure that is a good idea Harry? Professor Dumbledore was very clear about who we should tell," Hermione cautioned, finally butting into the conversation.

"Yes, he was," Harry said, turning to face his girlfriend. "And then he died because of the secrets he kept. People are out there dying now, _children_ are out there dying now. We are worried about keeping the secrets of a man that died because he couldn't let them go. I'm not willing to do that any longer." He placed a hand on her cheek softly. "I almost lost you today, again. I can't keep doing this. _We_ can't keep doing this."

"Does whatever Dumbledore has you working on have to do with what happened to Sally Jones?"

"Not directly. Hermione and I will tell you everything this evening. For now, I'm feeling completely worn out," Harry said weakly.

After getting some of their cuts and bruises taken care of, Harry announced he was going to take a shower. As Harry found the stairs he heard Hermione follow. She put a gentle hand on his shoulder when he stopped for her to catch up to him near the top of the stairs. He turned and they faced each other in the small stairwell.

"Harry, are you sure you want to do this? The contents of that Prophecy were never told to anyone verbatim. Dumbledore told people in vague terms what was in it, but he was never specific." Hermione put both hands on his shoulders, squaring him towards her.

"I don't care anymore. Everyone is out there fighting. So many people have given up their lives for this fight. I have no right to hide behind my responsibilities anymore. Things could be so much worse than it is for us," Harry said, thinking back to what Bethany had suffered before she had most likely been murdered as well.

"What did you see in his head Harry? You can tell me," Hermione said, her curious nature finally unable to hold back the questions anymore.

Harry took a deep, weary breath. "Voldemort was there. He was young though. Sinclair would kidnap the girls and then sell them to Voldemort and his followers for… entertainment." Harry shuddered. "You saw the pictures. What they must have done to the girls _before_ selling them off to the highest bidder must have been horrendous." Harry's eyes fluttered closed, trying to block out the images and thoughts of the recent events.

Hermione's face blanched at the description, but she didn't appear surprised. "I guessed as much from the pictures in the book and the names of some of the … 'buyers.'" She moved her mouth in a disgusting way around the last word. "If you think that involving everyone else in this is for the best, then I'm with you."

"I just want to keep you safe," Harry said.

Her eyes flashed for a moment. "Stop saying that! I'm not a damsel that you need to rescue Harry. Yes, I was caught off guard. Sinclair surprised both of us. But don't forget that while you fought one vampire, I held off two," Hermione said, her chin rising in indignation.

"It isn't a competition Hermione," Harry bit off impatiently. "I know you aren't a damsel! All I'm saying is that I'm afraid of losing you. I want to ask for help before I do something stupid and you end up killed because of it!" Harry said, getting more and more frustrated by the second. "There are worse things in the world than admitting you need help."

Hermione seemed to deflate a little bit. "I'm sorry. You're right. Training and doing research has taken up all my time and attention. I haven't allowed myself to think about the reality of what has been going on outside of this house. Everything from last night and today has reminded me why we are doing this and what is a stake if we fail." Hermione bit her lip, looking lost in thought.

Harry pulled her into a hug, letting his flash of frustration fade. "I know how you feel."

* * *

**Saturday, September 20th, 1997**

The head office hadn't changed much since the last time Harry had been in the room. True it had more of an austere feminine touch to it then it had when Dumbledore resided in it, but overall it was the same. Harry had the distinct feeling that it was an intentional design choice, leaving a few elements of the previous headmaster in the decorations of the room as if every new design was an amalgamation of all the headmasters that came before.

The evening meal was completed and most of the students had headed back to their bedrooms. The Order members were waiting for Arthur to come from the Burrow before Harry told them why there were all gathering.

McGonagal and Arthur entered the room and the door leading to the moving spiral staircase closed behind them with a soft click. She looked over her glasses at Harry and the other members of the room. Harry could tell that she was apprehensive. Harry knew Minerva well enough to know that she liked everything in its place and done the proper way. She liked having control over situations, which is what made her such a good head of house, and Harry assumed, a good Headmistress as well.

Harry's eyes flicked to the portrait that hung behind her desk. Albus Dumbledore sat in his frame, still sleeping. Apparently it sometimes took a great deal of time for portraits to awaken after their living counterparts had passed away. Not for the first time, Harry wished that his parents or Sirius had had a portrait made before they had passed away. Even though it was only a shade of their memories brought to life with some clever spellwork, it would still be more than he currently had.

"Alright Mister Potter, what have you called us here for?" McGonagall's Scottish burr was stronger than usual and the corners of her eyes were tight with sadness and grief.

Harry drew in a breath and Hermione gave his hand a squeeze of reassurance. "So today, Hermione and I went on a scouting mission. Looking for something that Dumbledore set us on the path to find, secretly, before he died. That's the reason why we thought it was important to go alone, even though it was dangerous and somewhat reckless."

"What could Albus have told you that would make you feel that way?" Remus said from his chair. He was giving Harry a hard stare as if trying to see the cogs working in Harry's head.

"What did he tell you about the things he and I were doing last year?" Harry asked making sure to look the different members of the Order in the eye as he did so.

"He didn't tell us much, other than he was putting his faith in you and he implored us to do the same," Shacklebolt said from his seat in the room.

"Yes, but why? Did he tell you why you were guarding a prophecy in the Department of Mysteries?" Harry asked. He had spent a good part of the afternoon thinking about how he wanted to lay the information out in front of them. Just dropping the different sets of information on them didn't seem right without context.

"Well, we know it was a prophecy involving you and Voldemort. He told us that the contents were why he sought you and your parents out that Halloween night," Arthur said. Harry was glad that at least Mr. Weasley had been informed somewhat of the thing that he had nearly lost his life guarding in their 5th year.

"That is true, but it doesn't tell you why it was so important," Harry said. He waved his hand and the words appeared hovering in the air, spelling out the prophecy that killed his parents.

_The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches ... born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies ... and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not ... and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives ... the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies ..._

Harry gave them a minute or so to read the words hanging in the air. "This is why he came after my parents. There was only one other family that could have met this description, and that was the Longbottoms. Voldemort chose to come to my house first, and without knowing it, he put the prophecy in motion. He marked me." Harry lifted the fringe of his hair rather unnecessarily, everyone present in the room being smart enough to figure out what he had meant.

"We knew we were guarding a prophecy, but not what was in it," Remus said. "I had a feeling it was about you, but that is because I was with your parents at the time when it was made."

"Exactly. The information regarding it was only shared with a few. Unfortunately, that lack of understanding put a great many people in danger. The only people that can remove a prophecy from the shelf in the Hall are the people that it is about or who it was told to. In this case, there were only four people who could have taken the orb off the shelf: Sybil Trelawney, Albus Dumbledore, Harry, and Voldemort," Hermione rattled off, backing up Harry's point.

"So you're saying that we took turns guarding a prophecy that only you or Riddle would realistically be able to take?!" Arthur said, alarmed. "One or two members of the Order were never going to be enough to hold him back if he had wanted it!" The older man absently felt his neck where Nagini had bit him nearly two years ago.

"Correct, but that was never the point," Hermione cut in. "We came here to tell you about the secrets that have caused people to get hurt or die. This is one of them. The plan the entire time was to lure Voldemort to the hall himself. Dumbledore used the prophecy as bait for him so that he would have to reveal himself." She bit her lip cautiously, her eyes flicking to the portrait behind McGonagall's desk. "Professor Dumbledore needed the world to know that Voldemort was back. The prophecy was perfect bait."

She and Harry had talked through much of this over the last few weeks only to realize that there were a thousand webs that the Headmaster had spun around everyone to keep them in line. It was never done out of malice. It was done because that was the way he had always done things. Secrets and half-truths to accomplish a larger goal. Dumbledore wasn't a bad man, but explaining the truth of things was going to paint him quite a bad light.

"Unfortunately we all know what happened after that. Riddle used our mental connection to lure _me_ down there instead to do it _for_ him." Harry paused for a minute, thinking of the consequences of those decisions. Sirius falling through the veil. Hermione falling to the purple fire. "Dumbledore's plan worked. The only problem was that it cost Sirius his life in the process."

"So that's the truth of the prophecy. I have to either kill him or he kills me," Harry said, meeting the different sets of eyes around the room.

"I don't think my training for two months is going to be enough to help you there lad," Moody said frowning.

Harry smiled at his bluntness. "True, especially since right now he is effectively immortal," Harry said, returning the bluntness in kind.

Faces blanched around the room. "Just because he is strong, doesn't make him immortal," Kingsley said in his deep voice.

"No, I wasn't speaking metaphorically. Does anyone here know what a Horcrux is?" Harry asked.

There was a minute pause before Remus spoke up. "I believe it had something to do with ancient Egypt and what the Pharos would use to remain king for longer, but the book I read it from was vague."

"Vague for a very good reason," Hermione replied. "A Horcrux is a container, which can be anything, that holds a portion of the soul. The act of murder- not self-defense, premeditated murder- is such a terrible act that the soul can't survive it. With the proper spells in place, when you commit the murder you can sheer that portion of your soul off and store it in the object. Tethering you to the world of the living unless it is destroyed," she finished solemnly.

"So he has created a Horcrux, and that was how he survived the night he killed Lily and James?" McGonagall asked from behind her desk.

"No, he didn't create _a_ Horcrux. We believe, as did Dumbeldore, that he created seven of them," Harry said with a sigh.

Harry again waved his hand and some images floated in the air. "The diary caused Ginny to open the Chamber of Secrets. A ring from Marvolo Gaunt, Voldemort's ancestor. A cup from the Founder Helga Hufflepuff. A locket once belonging to Slytherin himself. Nagini, his snake. A mystery item, probably belonging to Ravenclaw in some way. Finally, the portion contained inside his body," Harry let the images float in the middle of the room for a minute before letting them fade.

"We have destroyed two of them for sure at this time. The Diary and the ring are both gone. He does not know they have been removed which allows us the element of surprise still," Hermione said. "From what we can tell he doesn't feel when one is taken from him, but if he was to start checking on their locations, or got wind that we were hunting them down, then he would likely move the surviving ones or create more. We could very well be fighting him for generations with no hope of success. Which is why this was secret for this long."

The silence in the room spoke volumes. The adults looked a mix between horrified, angry, and sad. "So you are telling me that Albus told three teenagers to go out into the world in secret and find the shards of the Dark Lords soul so he could finally be killed by another teenager? That is what this entire war is depending on?" Kingsley said, astonished.

Harry and Hermione looked back and forth between one another. "Yes?" Harry replied.

"I presume you two have notes and plans for where these are located?" Remus said, his face pale but holding his voice steady.

"Yes, and that is where we went this morning. We have been researching and reading on locations that might have attracted him, but we weren't quite ready to move yet. However, after Tonks told us about what happened here last night, we couldn't wait any longer," Hermione said, looking more comfortable now that they had moved on to her specialty in all this, research.

"Did you find one?" Moody asked gruffly.

"No. We went to a place called Bran Castle. One of the places that started the muggle legend of Dracula. We did find a secret passage that led to some kind of…showroom," Harry said bitterly. "What we found can be the topic of a different conversation. Point being, we didn't find a Horcrux."

"Is there a way to identify them?" Arthur asked, having taken a seat in one of the armchairs, looking like he was going to be sick.

"We haven't figured that out yet no. The items thus far have been incredibly cursed and, in the case of the locket, very well protected." Harry replied. "The ring cursed Dumbledore's hand, which led to him taking me with him at the end of last year. Which is why we weren't in the castle when the Death Eaters attacked. We had found a hiding place for the locket, but someone had beaten us to it," Harry pulled the fake locket from his pocket and held it up. "The locket was a fake, with this note inside," He handed the note to Arthur and they passed it around the room, reading the cryptic words from R.A.B.

Remus's eyes lit up when he read the note. "I know this handwriting! This is from Regulus! Sirius's brother!"

Harry closed his eyes in frustration and breathed out a long angry breath. "Of course it is. Dammit!"

Hermione put a hand on his shoulder. "Harry, there is no way you could have known that. Don't beat yourself up."

"That's the entire point! Secrets! Everything was a secret and it has cost us _time_ ," Harry found himself standing. "It has cost us _lives_. I've had enough!"

"Harry, calm down and think. What does this mean if the locket was something that Regulus took?" Hermione said, standing in front of him and holding the sides of his face so he had to look at her. His anger wasn't quite abated yet though. He glared at her.

"He probably would have taken it back to Grimmauld Place. But it has been years since he died. Who knows where it has gotten to."

"We cleaned that house top to bottom two summers ago. We held that locket in our hands Harry. It was cursed and we couldn't get it to open," Hermione said, smiling at him.

"We can only hope that it is still there! You're brilliant Hermione!" Harry kissed her soundly, not really caring about the other people in the room.

"Well, I suppose that means there is one less to find. But that doesn't solve all our problems sadly. With this information, there is no point in planning out an attack on any of the locations where we think Voldemort is hiding. We have to destroy the other soul anchors first," Kingsley summed up succinctly.

"My idea was to hunt them down and then kill Nagini last when we actually find out where he is hiding," Harry said, stepping into the center of the room and looking around again.

"I came here today to finally share all these 'secrets' with you. We are a team. You have allowed us to join the ranks of the Order as full members and it isn't fair that you are risking your life for something you don't have all the facts about. Dumbledore was a great man in many respects, but in this he and I are different. I can't ask you all to fight with me in this, to support me and help me get to that final confrontation so I can kill him, without telling you what we are up against. I won't let more people die because Hermione, Ron, and I weren't fast enough to figure this all out on our own," Harry said, trying to show his genuine need for them to be behind him in this.

"Mister Potter, I think you have done the right thing. He was a good man, but this is something we should have all known from the start. We have put people's lives at risk and into situations we didn't understand. Albus always wanted to see the good in people and I was reminded of this yesterday when I realized what kind of brutality he had left unchecked in this school. He hoped against hope that the children wouldn't take up the fight, hoped that they could be spared, but I think that time has come and gone," McGonagal said from her desk. "I am not willing to let any more of my students die like Ms. Jones."

"I agree. I need to figure out a way to convince the Aurors to not seek out his hideout at this time. I can't imagine sending them on suicide missions that would result in nothing," Kingsley said, shaking his head.

"The information about Horcruxes can't leave this room. If Voldemort finds out at all what we know, then all of this is for nothing," Harry said vehemently.

"Absolutely, I'll just have to figure out a way to redirect their resources. Similar to the way I managed to keep them away from finding Sirius a few years ago. I am up for the task," Kingsley replied, nodding his head.

"Well, we don't want to miss any opportunities to capture any known Death Eaters though," Moody said. "If we don't attack the places where we know Voldemort has strongholds, then we might not remove enough of his soldiers." He had been very quiet through most of the conversation. The revelation about how difficult to kill Voldemort really was seemed to have shocked him slightly. Spending a life fighting the forces of darkness and dealing with the worst of humankind was a tough enough job without realizing that your greatest foe can barely be killed at all.

"I think that is all we have to share at this point. I imagine that we are going to go to number 12 and see if we can find the locket, but other than that we are still researching where the different things may be hidden," Hermione said.

"I think there is much to discuss what our plans are moving forward. You said that other than the two of you, Ron is the only other one who knew about any of these things?" Arthur asked.

"Yeah, I told Hermione and him about them after Dumbledore told me to keep it a secret with them being the exception. I didn't want to die being the only one knowing that he was effectively immortal," Harry said darkly. "And the more we learn about Voldemort and his followers the likelihood of me living to the end of this fight is getting smaller." Hermione winced and turned away for a moment.

"I don't think it is a forgone conclusion that you will die, Mister Potter. I think there is much we can do to help. Speaking of which, Albus instructed me to give you this. He did not say why or when, but I imagine that now is the time." McGonagall reached under her desk and pulled out the sword of Gryffindor in its sheath and handed it to him.

"He said that it could be of great use to you in your fight. Truthfully I wasn't too keen on giving anyone such a weapon, but knowing what I do now, I think it is best in your hands," she said, a small smile forming at the corners of her mouth.

Harry looped the strap over his shoulder and slid the adjustment until it was snug against his back. He reached over his shoulder and felt for the sword, finding it exactly where his hand had searched for it. Something inside of him hummed in resonation with the sword itself. Like the harmony of complementary notes, something inside Harry matched with the sword itself and Harry felt an overwhelming need to hold it in his hand. Gripping it, he slid it out of its sheath, holding it in front of him.

The sword itself was straight-bladed like the sword of a knight. It extended far in front of him as he held it, despite it being much lighter than it appeared. Harry reached out and grasped the long hilt with his second hand to balance the long two-handed sword. The air seemed to become charged with energy and with a smell of burnt ozone a bright red spark burst to life at the end of the sword. The spark blazed to life and slowly moved down the blade, changing colors as it slid closer to the crossguard. As the sparks changed from red to gold they seemed to change the blade as it moved closer to Harry's hand.

What had started as a long thin sword seemed to shimmer in the light of the sparks and shrink down on itself. The blade thickened from about ten centimeters across to triple that at its widest point. The point, rather than being the product of two straight lines, became a more rounded tip that was clearly razor-sharp on both sides. The hilt where the ruby was nestled seemed to glow for a moment before also changing. Suddenly the shape of a phoenix with its wings wrapped forward around the blade formed. The handle, which had been a two-handed tang, compacted to a manageable length for one-handed use.

The gold sparks faded away into the blade and just when Harry thought that it was over, the eyes of the phoenix snapped open revealing two inset rubies that glowed with pulsating power. The pulsing grew to speed and brightness that made him want to cover his eyes and just when it was about to reach its crescendo the wings of the phoenix snapped open to form a new crossguard.

The silver sword had a gold inlay on the base of the blade that spelled out the word Gryffindor clearly. The handle, wrapped in red leather, was clearly functional and the ornamentation that had been there before was no longer. The display longsword was now much more impressive looking but also clearly battle-ready. The sword seemed to melt into Harry's palm as if it knew him and he knew it.

The magic still singing in the sword felt perfectly tuned to Harry's magic. He spun the sword around on his wrist, testing out the balance and the weight. As he whistled the tip through the air, small traces of gold magic trailed through the air in arcs of power that left afterimages in his eyes. He flipped the tip backward and like a magnet, it seemed to find the opening of the sheath and it slid home with a soft click.

Harry was immediately aware of everyone's eyes on him. He didn't blame them. Even he was incredibly confused as to what had just happened. "Uh… I don't remember it doing anything like that last time I held it…." Harry said, blushing slightly at the looks of awe from around the room.

"That is because the last time I gave it to you, you weren't ready to own it, Mister Potter." The voice came from the back of the room and it took Harry a second to realize that it had come from the dusty worn hat sitting on the shelf behind McGonagall's desk.

"Uh, what do you mean?" Harry asked plainly.

"Both I and the sword belonged to Godric. He left us here to watch over the school after he had passed on. I was here to guide and watch over the castle, as a voice for Hogwarts herself. The sword was left to be the final bastion against the darkness should it arise. Godric believed that the forces of light and dark would always clash here. The sword was left in my care for a time when the castle would not only need a voice but also a shield."

The hat paused for a moment. " _You_ are to be that shield, Mister Potter."


	14. Chapter 14: Sonder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Woosh! The finale of Part 1. The culmination of the first arc of the story. This chapter is longer than most at this point, I think maybe the longest that I have put up so far. My wife put in, a stupid amount of work with me on this chapter. I am more grateful for her help, guidance, and gift of her time than I can say. 
> 
> I hope you all like this chapter. There is a chance that the next one is going to take a little extra time to put out since we were a touch late on this one. 
> 
> Another thank you to all my friends on the HMS Harmony discord. You guys really are the best source of fun and inspiration I have encountered in many years. You all make my day and I hope you enjoy the story!

**Chapter 14**

**Sonder**

**The realization that each passerby has a life as vivid as your own.**

* * *

**Thursday, October 30th, 1997**

Harry sat in the backyard of the Keep alone. Hermione was spending some time with her parents. Harry had finally talked her into taking a night off to spend with them. It had been weeks since they had all been able to relax together as a family. Dan and Jane had been continually working with the other Order members on medical equipment and finding new ways to have healing on hand in a battle. Harry's heart soared when he thought about how much the two were contributing, despite having no magic.

The parents of Hermione Granger being altruistic and willing to give of themselves for others came as no real surprise. Harry just still found himself impressed at how _much_ they added to the group. Tonks was an above-average potion brewer and frequently could be heard marveling at the different ways that magical and non-magical medicine could mix. The Grangers' most recent discovery was, in Harry's opinion, the best one yet. Time-released medications in the non-magical world were commonplace. Time-released potions were not. Tonks had explained the idea to them over dinner one night. Potions didn't need to be able to do that because magical healing happened so much faster than non-magical medicine could facilitate. To heal a bone, you drink some Skelegrow and wait for the bone to magically knit itself back together. So, the need was never there.

Dan had come up with the idea to mix the two. After seeing the three of them come back from Paris on death's doorstep, Dan and Jane had driven themselves to the brink to find ways to help their daughter and Harry. After much back and forth with Tonks, they had created a time-released blood replenishing potion and pepper-up potion. For times when they knew they would be heading into dangerous situations, they could prepare themselves for blood loss or fatigue, and the potion would take effect as needed. Harry had tried using the pepper-up tablet before training one day. He had been jittery but sharp.

Tonight though, he sat in concentration. The quiet wind whistled through the night and Harry took a deep breath in. The air was starting to crisp with the oncoming Autumn, but he wasn't chilled. Harry had found that taking some quiet time to sort his thoughts at night helped him. Usually, it was in the quiet of his bedroom, but with the weather finally changing he was more inclined to spend the time to himself outdoors.

Harry felt the breeze ruffle his hair, the feeling bringing a ghost of a smile to his face as he was reminded of flying. Just as quickly as the smile had begun to form, though, it slipped away. Ron was still laying inside recovering from their botched mission. Every day that he didn't wake up seemed like torture to Harry. Madam Pomfrey assured him many times over that Ron's condition was improving, but the fact remained that they wouldn't know for sure until he woke up.

Breathing out a long breath, Harry stood. He pushed all his thoughts to the edge of his mind. As he felt the breeze wash across him, he let all his worries fade into silence. Since Harry's fight with the Vampires almost two weeks before, he had realized the importance of speed and reaction time. There was every possibility that Voldemort would have similar advantages at his disposal.

In the clarity of his mind, Harry surged his hand upward and around to his back. The leather handle of the sword met his hand, and with steeled confidence, Harry grasped the hilt and pulled. The tip whistled through the wind as Harry cut slashes through the air, cleaving through invisible opponents. Moody had guided him through some basic sword forms. He gave Harry enough of a base that Hermione had been able to find some books to help with the rest.

He let his mind wander and didn't stop to concentrate on which movements his body was picking. Harry felt the magic flowing through him and as he allowed his body to flow through the motions, he could feel the magic pulling and guiding him. Pushing himself faster and faster Harry followed the thread of the blade tip through form after form.

Harry dug in hard and spun on the ball of his foot. He buckled his knee and pushed himself into the air, sending himself into a sideways spin with the sword trailing in a wide arc in his right hand. The force of magic that he had augmented his jump with allowed him to complete the turn and strike a diagonal strike that would have cleaved someone from shoulder to hip. The sword cut through the air with such force that the tip grazed the ground below him and carved a gash in it that smoldered with blue fire.

As Harry landed, he felt the magic sing to him, and he followed the thread again. Allowing the momentum of the swing to carry him forward, he threw the sword in front of him as hard as he could toward a tree. The sword corrected flight in the air and slammed point first into the trunk of the tree. The tip split through the back of the tree with an explosion of bark and splinters. Harry could see from a distance that the tree was smoking through the cracked fibers.

Without stopping Harry knelt and pushed his palm into the ground. The more and more that Harry let go of his conscious thoughts the slower time seemed to move. He slammed his palm down and unleashed a wave of magic. Letting his mind envision what he wanted, spiderwebs of hot blue electricity ran through the ground away from him. Grass burned into patterns that resembled a Lichtenberg figure, as the sparks spread across the lawn. Harry was left kneeling in a circle of protected space while everything else was consumed by the waves of power.

Standing slowly, Harry looked around the yard and felt himself fall back into his thoughts. With a lazy hand, he reached out to the side and called the sword back to him. Shattering itself free from the core of the tree, the sword flew back to the air with the same speed that it had left his hand. Despite the racing projectile, Harry didn't flinch. He caught the sword and with an effortless spin over his wrist, it was safely back in its sheath.

Harry wiped his brow, finding it slick with more sweat than he had anticipated. After clearing his mind, his practice with the sword was much better and came with more ease. He was constantly finding more and more value in controlling his racing thoughts and driving worries. Without the space in his mind taken up with such distractions, he could allow the flow of magic to guide him.

"I can't say that I have ever seen anything like that," Remus said leaning against the door frame.

Harry grinned to himself and turned around to see the older man in the doorway. He had heard him approach while he was practicing but hadn't dropped his focus to acknowledge him.

"I'm mostly making it up as I go. The diagrams in the books are helpful," he said, running his hand through his hair again and giving his forehead some air.

Remus chuckled. "Something tells me that those forms weren't in any of the books."

Harry blushed. "Not exactly." He shuffled his feet and sat down near the bottom stair, giving his legs rest. "Sometimes, if I can clear my head enough, I just know what to do."

"Like, you remember the pictures?"

"No, like in my body, I just know what to do. I'm not following anything. I just do what feels right," Harry said, ignoring the urge to pull the blade again to feel it in his hands.

"Harry, you were moving so fast through those motions that I couldn't even see exactly what you were doing. I haven't ever seen anyone move like that, not even Dumbledore," Remus said quietly.

Harry didn't know how to respond to that. "I don't know, there is something about it that I just can feel. I know when what I'm doing is right and when it isn't. I can't explain it."

"Then don't."

Harry turned around to face his previous professor agape. Remus smiled and chuckled again before sitting down on the bottom stair next to Harry. "It's magic," he said while patting Harry on the shoulder. "It doesn't have to be explained. You are holding a powerful magical artifact that was crafted by Goblins with the magic of Godric Gryffindor imbued into it. It was created to be the defender of Hogwarts." Remus sighed and smiled. "I guess what I'm saying is, maybe that is explanation enough."

"You seemed pretty interested in my spell work earlier in the summer," Harry said, looking at Remus through the corner of his eye.

"It's true, but...things have changed since then. With the things I know now and the things I've seen you do... I just don't think I need an answer anymore. I don't think I ever once tried to question or understand why Dumbledore could do the things he could. He just could."

"Thanks...Moony," Harry smiled at the ground, a little embarrassed. Since they had come back from Romania, Harry had found himself with a newfound understanding of the older man. Harry had known what it was like to be lonely and lost, and when he had felt like that, Hermione and Ron had come into his life. For Remus, it had been the Marauders. But, Remus had lost his friends. Harry couldn't imagine what he would do if he lost Hermione. He finally felt like he understood the depth of Remus's pain, loss and overwhelming grief.

"I guess what I'm saying, Harry. You can do these incredible things just because you are Harry, and that's good enough for me. Maybe it should be good enough for you too," Remus said in a calm deep voice that seemed to settle around Harry like a soothing blanket.

Harry was speechless. The thing that he had wanted to hear more than anything from his loved ones, Remus had just said. "Thank you Moony, I mean it. I am going to do everything I can to deserve that kind of compliment." Harry thought for a moment. "Tomorrow is the anniversary-"

"I know. I have been thinking about them a lot today," Remus said quietly, interrupting what Harry was about to say.

"I want to visit their graves, Remus. I've never been."

"Trust me, I do too. But I'm worried what might be waiting for us there," Remus said sadly.

Harry thought about it for a moment. "I know," he sighed, "But what if there is a clue there? I feel like going to the place where he first lost, we might be able to learn something about him. I just feel like it is important."

"You might be right. We aren't going to find the things we are looking for or get any closer to winning the war if we don't go do something. We haven't had any luck so far, maybe following your gut instinct is a good idea." Remus looked out to the distance. "Truth be told, the way we fought the last war, we were losing. I can't help but think that there is merit in doing things a little differently this time. Thank you for being strong enough to suggest things against the grain Harry. I think it shows a lot of bravery. It's the kind of boldness that your father and Sirius would be proud of."

"Going on gut instinct didn't work out well when Hermione and I went to Romania to check out that castle," Harry said, his mind flying with images of the vampires hiding in the shadows.

"Maybe there wasn't anything there, but now, you also know a location it is _not._ The number of people that have found the Horcruxes is small. Dumbledore didn't hesitate to go after the ring on his gut instincts. In the end, you did exactly what he did. Ironically, you both ended with the same results. Dumbledore got injured by the ring and you ran into vampires. You are learning from his mistakes while losing none of the bravery," Remus said quietly into the night air. "Let's go see your parents."

* * *

**Friday, October 31st, 1997**

Just after five in the afternoon Harry, Hermione, and Remus appeared in Godric's Hollow. Not being far from Ottery St. Catchpole, it wasn't hard for Remus to show them the way. The trees rustled in the faint breeze that rolled through the outskirts of the quiet town. Harry was interested to see that there was a mix of non-magical and magical traditions lighting the streets. Some houses were softly lit with the flickering lights of fires and torches, while others had the purple glow of electric lights.

"How..." Hermione started to ask but stopped when she heard Remus chuckling.

"It took you 7 seconds to ask. I was counting," Remus said.

Harry coughed a laugh that he hid behind his hand. Hermione shot him a glare and then turned back to Remus with a raised eyebrow. "Well?"

"The houses nearby are where families live near one another that have magical and non-magical members. The magical families here don't have to use an abundance of magic so the electronics all still work. Closer to the main group of shops it becomes more like Diagon Alley," Remus explained as they started to get closer to the first group of houses.

Harry marveled at the children starting to scamper from house to house asking for candy. From magical or non-magical means, surprises hid behind every door with offerings of candy. It looked, lacking a better word, normal.

"This is why my parents came here, wasn't it. So they could both be themselves." Harry didn't even bother phrasing it as a question.

"Neither of them wanted to ask the other to give up their way of life. So, they found a way, as they always did, to be together without compromise," Remus said, absolute pride in his voice.

The small grouping of two dozen houses ran wild with children and Harry realized that the three of them hadn't even bothered to change their clothes. Remus looked like he came from the magical world, while Harry and Hermione looked somewhere in between. Harry reached up and tugged the hood of his jumper to cover the sword hilt. After looking around, Harry realized that it probably didn't matter if the families saw the sword. There were tons of kids here with swords in hand. Harry smiled at the various costumes. The magical children had gotten some help from their parents, but the non-magical costumes were pretty good too. The running and laughter of children and calls from parents through the chaos split Harry's face with a grin.

Hermione slid next to him and grasped his hand. "I don't know about you, but seeing all these kids here and... _life_ happening...it's nice to be reminded why we are doing this, you know?"

"Yeah, I know what you mean. It's weird- in London, it was almost as if everyone had given up. Here though, it looks like they are just living life anyway," Harry said as he sidestepped a running pre-teen dressed in green and gold spandex. Far from being annoyed, Harry smiled as the kid tore past him without a second thought.

"I forgot that this would be happening tonight. The Halloween traditions here are, for obvious reasons, pretty strong," Remus said as they cleared the cluster of houses and continued down the road.

Children still dashed down the sidewalks, but after they turned down a small lane that went through a copse of trees they were alone.

"Your parents' house was just down this way."

The gate swung open soundlessly when pressed. Harry was surprised that it hadn't broken down even after all the years of disuse. Glancing down at it, he realized with a small smile that, of course, it was enchanted. The rest of the yard looked like it hadn't been touched in a long time. There was no spell to stop plants from growing where they shouldn't. Using a spell to control nature in such ways was notoriously difficult. It could be done, but the amount of power and upkeep that was required usually outweighed its usefulness. In this case, without someone to tend to any of the overgrowths, the plants had taken back much of the yard.

The small white fence to which the gate was attached was still visible around much of the yard except for a few spots where the weeds and shrubs obscured it from view. There was a single tree in the yard with a tire swing hanging from it. The rope looked frayed but still managed to hold the weight of the tire. Enchantments held on for a long time. Eventually, the elements would take over, but sixteen years wasn't long enough for that to happen.

The house looked like any other small family house in the area. White walls and blue window shutters and a matching front door.

"Your mother picked this place out. After visiting James's family home, she didn't want anything like that. Pureblood families generally live in large manors, but that was never Lily's style," Remus said, smiling sadly. "She used to say that she refused to live in the 'Ancient House of Potter', or some nonsense. She was always teasing James about it." 

Harry felt the corner of his mouth turn up at the mention of his parents teasing flirtations. They approached the door. He turned the handle slowly, not sure of what he was going to find inside. The door swung inward without too much resistance, similar to the gate. "I thought the door was blasted down?" Harry asked.

"It was, but I fixed it after your parent's funeral. I couldn't leave the house like that. I didn't want Voldemort sympathizers or anyone else to come in and do anything untoward to the house. It didn't seem right to leave it so unprotected," the older man responded.

Harry nodded and they entered the house. The inside of the house showed signs of the fight that had ensued that night. The spellfire burned into the walls and ceiling and the broken furniture showed that James Potter had not given up easily. Harry had steeled himself for seeing the evidence of the fight. Those marks on the walls were the last signs of life that James Potter had left on the world. Dying to protect his family.

Harry turned and looked up the stairs where he knew he would find his bedroom. He gently stepped over some broken furniture and tested the bottom stair. It seemed sound enough, so he took a few more steps, walking lightly.

The upstairs wasn't in any better shape. Lily had of course been more concerned with protecting Harry than dueling the maniac that was stalking them up the stairs, but regardless she had managed to fire off quite a few spells before he broke into the room. Harry couldn't imagine what she had been feeling at the time. Listening to her husband fight and die while she huddled with their only child in her arms. Harry didn't have anything to compare that feeling to. His mind seemed to cringe away from even imagining it.

Hermione and Remus followed him upstairs. Remus was somber but quiet. Hermione was steel-faced as she looked around and observed what were the final moments of life that the Potter family had known. They had now spent months honing themselves, training their minds and bodies to continue the fight that had seemingly ended here. They had given up their education and were choosing to put their lives on the line to end the reign of terror that this man had caused, simply so no one else would have to suffer the same fate as the Potters.

Harry brushed the dust off the mobile that was hanging above his crib, exposing the playful pastel colors of the brooms and snitches that would have been lazily spinning around and around. Harry searched the depths of his memory to find some trace of recognition for the toy, but he found none. Hermione stood in the doorway and Harry glanced out of the corner of his eye to see her face.

"I'm ok Hermione," Harry said softly. His heart was heavy from walking through this house again, but he didn't feel crushed under the pain. "Thanks for bringing me here Remus. It feels good coming here first. Feels like a proper goodbye."

"Of course Harry. I'm glad it's bringing you some peace."

"Where are they buried?" Harry asked with more emotion in his voice than he was prepared for.

"In a small church cemetery back toward the main part of town," Remus said as he followed Harry down the stairs and out of the house.

The walk back to the small block of streets and houses they had been through earlier was spent in pensive silence. Harry found that he wasn't overcome with grief. Instead, his mind was filled with quiet reflections on the life that his parents had tried to build for him. Harry couldn't help but wonder what his childhood would have been like if things had gone differently that night.

The gate of the cemetery rattled, locked. Harry was sure that visiting hours were over, but with a swipe of the knife from his wand holster on the lock, the gate swung open. It didn't take them long to find the headstones they were looking for.

In one of the last rows, Harry found his family. Instead of two graves, there was only one. The split headstone read:

**James and Lily Potter**

**Loving Parents and Friends**

" **The last e** **nemy** **that shall be destroyed is death** **"**

Harry knelt and placed a hand on his parent's tombstone. Hermione didn't keep her distance this time and came up behind him to place a hand on his shoulder. Harry didn't have the words to thank her for her support at the moment, so he just remained silent. He bowed his head for a few minutes, mentally thanking them for their sacrifice and finally finding closure about how they were taken from him. As a child, the Dursleys had told him that they had died in a car accident and that they were too poor and worthless for graves. The wound of growing up without parents had remained because he didn't even have the chance to say goodbye. Kneeling with their graves below him hurt. Like his entire being was being squeezed and torn simultaneously. But despite that pain, he could also feel the wound of their absence from his life begin to close.

Harry rose to his feet. "'The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death.' That's from the Bible, isn't it?" Harry said, vaguely remembering an Easter service that the Dursleys had dragged him to one year.

"Yes, Corinthians I believe," Hermione answered, her eyes a tad misty.

Harry kissed her cheek lightly and pulled her in for a hug. "Thank you for coming with me to do this. It means the world to have you here with me," he said honestly.

"Of course Harry. Wherever you need me, that's where I'll be," she said, smiling into his shoulder.

Harry smiled too as he pulled away from her and glanced over her shoulder. With a torturous drop in his stomach, he watched as the word "death" started to glow a pulsating acid green color. He stared, horrified, as the letters began to bleed.

"No, no, no," Harry said as he rushed over to the headstone.

"We must have set something off by coming here!" Remus said with a string of curses. He pulled out his wand, and that's when Harry noticed it. Faint in the growing darkness of evening, but noticeable. "Hermione-" Harry trailed off as his breath hung cold in the air. Almost as if spoken in the dead of winter.

It _had_ been a trap. Just not one for _him_.

The sounds of wild screaming confirmed Harry's fear and all sense of self-preservation fled as he and Hermione took off. Remus was hot on their heels as they skidded around a corner to find the main street in complete chaos. Down from the sky swooped hundreds of Dementors. The aggressive arcs that took them down to attack the crowd scattered adults and children alike.

Some wizards in the mix were already attempting to cast their Patronuses to various degrees of success, but the sheer number of Dementors had them completely overwhelmed. The screams of the magical children pierced the air as they saw the dark creatures floating closer. Not able to even see what they were being attacked by, the screams of the non-magical children were worse. Time seemed to slow down as Dementors swooped down from every direction and began to suck the souls from adults and children alike.

Harry froze. The sight of the horrors in front of him made fighting the oppressive depression from the crush of Dementors nearly impossible. The swirls of black forms and trailing cold mist stirred up a whirlpool of fear and memories in his mind. He could hear his mother's screams. Sirius laughing as he fell backward through the veil. Hermione's face when he was sure Draco was going to kill her.

Then he saw a young non-magical child screaming as his mother fell to her knees in front of him, her soul being sucked from her body by something the child could not even see.

Harry felt himself get yanked back to reality. He looked at Hermione and grabbed her hand. He planted his feet and calmed his mind. This time though, it wasn't Harry that called the magic forth. Harry cleared his mind and let Hermione guide their actions.

"Now!"

" _Expecto Patronum!_ " they both called in strong voices.

The golden phoenix and hippogriff jumped from their wands and lit the sky above the homes. They spiraled through the air like true raptors of the sky and carved their way through the Dementors. Harry held on to the memory of the first time Hermione had told him she loved him. The memory was so strong that keeping the spell energized was almost no effort at all.

As the Patronuses swooped through the clouds of black-cloaked monsters, the hordes fled and scattered. Whenever the Patronuses touched them, the Dementors burst into flames. The golden phoenix let out a song that seemed to reverberate through the entire street with perfect clarity. Faster and faster the hippogriff and phoenix spun through the air until they were a circling blur overhead. The Dementors fled as quickly as they could but with an almighty flash of light, the Patronuses collided and burst into an explosion of golden magic. The wave overtook the clouds of Dementors, and they burned in the sky, their ashes swirling away in the wind.

The three of them immediately took off running towards the group of people. Relieved parents ran to embrace crying children all over the street. Harry's eyes flitted around, but he could find no traces of empty husks the Dementors would have left behind.

Harry knelt next to a sniffling child dressed as a very traditional vampire, who was trying to scoop some candy back into his broken bag. "Are you ok?"

"Yes sir, I hid over there under that bush," the boy said shakily. "I just want to get my candy and go home."

"I can help with that," Harry said softly. He reached out and touched the end of the bag and it knitted itself back together and the candy flew promptly inside.

"Thanks! I wish me and my parents could do stuff like that!" The young boy said smiling at him.

"Let me help you find your parents," Harry said, trying to control the thrumming of his heart.

"Thanks, mister. My mum was dressed as a mummy and dad was dressed like a swamp monster," the kid said as he started to walk over to the sidewalk.

"That's my dad!" The child cried and ran ahead of Harry and toward a man standing with his back to them. The man was certainly dressed up like a swamp monster, through the daze of thoughts Harry did note that the costume was very well done. There were clumps of dirt and grass stuck to different parts of himself. Mud was painted onto different parts of his clothes, his exhausted posture seemed to make the costume even more real.

The man turned around to greet his son and as he spun, Harry saw the rotted and uselessly hanging jaw and lifeless bloodied eyes.

" _No!_ " Harry screamed as the Infiri launched forward and tackled the small boy to the ground, already tearing into his flesh. The small screams were silenced just before the fireball that burst from Harry's hand vaporized the Infiri where it had stood. The damage was already done. It had taken all of a second for the Infiri to rip a large chunk out of the boy's neck.

Harry looked around to see the halting gait of Infiri walking into the traumatized crowd from every direction. With their eyes on the sky and the chaos of everyone in costumes running around, no one had noticed the Infiri slowly advancing into the neighborhood until it was too late. Harry started firing fireballs from his hands as fast as he could be certain he wouldn't hit any children or bystanders. Necromorphic monsters burst into flame all around him, but no matter how many he slew there were more to take their place.

Harry switched to his wand, his desire for precision outweighing the convenience and speed of wandless casting. Harry caught sight of a small girl running away from one of the beasts. Harry screamed at her to duck and thankfully she listened. The blue fireball that cleaved a hole through the Infiri had gone right over her head. A woman came running with blood on her arm to scoop the small girl up and continue running. Harry cleared the way for them with a few more fireballs and they disappeared into the front door of a house.

Screams of pain and grief, tearing of bone and flesh ripped through the night. Harry looked around desperately. He couldn't save everyone, there were just too many of them. He caught sight of Hermione defending a small group of children against a horde pressing on them from all sides. Harry didn't waste time with speech or even rational thought, he just flew forward. As his feet pelted him toward the crowd of terrorized people he reached over his shoulder and felt the sword fit into his palm.

" _Harry!_ " Hermione screamed as he flew toward the crowd, now sword and wand in hand. He didn't stop to acknowledge that he was rocketing towards hundreds of flesh consuming undead, or that it might be a bad idea.

With a mighty roar, Harry launched himself ten meters into the air over the tops of the undead. Holding the sword high overhead, he calmed his mind. For a fraction of a second, Harry let his mind wash blank. He let his magic guide his thoughts and actions, completely surrendering to the need to _protect_. At the pinnacle of his leap, the tip of the sword burst into flame. White-hot fire engulfed the entire blade in a split second.

Harry plunged the sword downward and with a crash, he landed in the middle of the crowd with the point of the sword spearing down. As the tip of the sword broke the ground, Harry felt something inside him change. Time slowed down to his eyes and for a second that seemed to last a lifetime, Harry could see bright white rivers leading in every direction. Rivulets of beautiful luminescent light flowing through everything. The people around him lit within with pulsating life. Magical and non-magical alike were all threaded together through the webs of beauty that spread all around Harry.

And glowing like the sun, was Hermione. The light filling her was connected by a golden thread of magic to him. Standing out from the other ethereal ties, the beam connecting them was a flowing mass of power. Back and forth like gentle waves rising to crash against distant shores. Harry could see and feel the gentle thrum of magic beating between him and Hermione. He felt like he could feel her presence and her love pressing through him. Harry was now certain beyond all doubt that it was _their_ magic he was wielding. The gravity of that was not lost on him, she was giving of herself in such an intimate powerful way, he felt humbled to be in its presence.

For an eternity Harry was poised on a knee with the sword point down in the ground in front of him, like a keeling knight bowing down. He knelt at the base of the magic all around him and surrendered to it. To Harry's eyes, the sword slowly sunk into the ground until the point of the sword connected with the river below him. Like a lightning rod, Harry felt it surge into him. Light and magic rushed up the blade to meet his hands. Suddenly, a white flash of light burst from Harry. The explosion of white magic waved through the crowd and the Infiri were all vaporized to dust. The living remained untouched while the undead bodies were purged of the necromancy. He had not used the wealth of magic to destroy, he had used it to cleanse. The souls of the living were unharmed while the tortured bodies of the dead returned to death.

Harry took a deep breath and felt his magic pull back inside him with a tug. He felt weary all of a sudden, but he stood nonetheless. There were people in various states of distress around him. All traces of the Infiri gone, Harry realized that the only dead bodies left were their victims.

Parents rushed around Harry and despite the display of magic, Harry was instantly invisible. The crowd moved around him as the adults started tending to the wounded children. Harry's eyes refused to blink as they flitted from body to body. Scenes of desperation surrounded him. Children crying over the bodies of parents who had died protecting them. Parents holding the tiny bodies of the ones they weren't able to save and protect. Even with the amount of power Harry had been able to command, it hadn't come in time.

Non-magical costumes laid next to the magical ones, equally devoid of life. Harry's breathing increased as he saw some brutalized bodies of small children scattered around. The screams of the parents were worse. Harry tried to close his ears, close his senses from the grief that was pouring out of the surrounding people. It pressed on him like a blanket. He turned the sword point back over his shoulder and slid it into place. His wand slipped back into his holster with a soft click.

Hermione wrapped her arms around him and Harry finally closed his eyes. Letting his breath exhale slowly onto her neck, folding himself into her embrace.

"I wasn't fast enough," Harry said thickly.

"Harry, you did more than arguably any other living wizard could have," Remus said holding his shoulder. "Let's see if we can help some of them,"

Harry made to step forward when he stopped stock-still. He slowly reached into his pocket. "Hermione," he said softly.

She turned. "What is it?"

Harry closed his hand around the small coin in his pocket. His heart started to beat faster and faster as he pulled it from his pocket.

Emblazoned across the top of the well-worn DA coin was a message. Tonks had taken the master coin with her when she had left for Hogwarts. The message was simple, "Attack".

Remus was already fishing in his pocket, pulling out the small mirror. He called Tonks' name a few times into the glass to no effect. "We can apparate to Hogsmead-"

"No time. Remus, gather everyone you can and meet us at Hogwarts," Harry said with as much confidence as he could muster. Even in his drained state, he could hear how hollow the confidence sounded.

"I will make sure Tonks is safe Moony, I promise. But I need you to get the Order to Hogwarts as fast as you can," Harry implored him to understand.

"How are you going to get there?"

Harry reached out and grasped Hermione's hand with one hand and pulled the sword from his back with the other. Harry looked around at the grief and death all around him. Blood and tears were on more faces than not. His heart clenched with sadness for the ones he couldn't save, then filled with the resolve to save as many at Hogwarts as he could.

"I'm going to walk in." With a thought, Harry apparated himself and Hermione directly into the entrance hall of Hogwarts.

* * *

The second that his feet hit the flagstones he made to move forward towards the giant doors, but Hermione held his arm and pulled him back. She held a finger to her lips and pointed to the shadows behind one of the statues. A moment later Neville and Luna stepped out.

"What's happening?" Harry asked after a quick silencing charm,

"Death Eaters. Not sure how they got in. Sent the half-bloods and purebloods back to their dorms. The muggle-borns are still inside the hall with the teachers. We managed to knock out and tie up the Death Eaters that were guiding our group. They weren't expecting us to fight back," Neville reported without a stutter.

"The Ravenclaws are safe in their dorm. I don't think the Death Eater posted there can get through the enchantment on the door. I slowed him down enough that he didn't see the door seal up," Luna said succinctly. Her tone of voice when she said "slowed" told Harry that the Death Eater wasn't going anywhere soon.

"Good. Go gather as many of the students as you can and get them to the third floor. Use the statue of the humpbacked witch. Can you both figure out a plan from there?" Hermione quickly explained the password and where the tunnel would lead. Harry's head was still on a swivel trying to see up and down all the hallways and passages at once.

"We will take care of them, Harry, I promise." Luna's soft voice, cut clearly with determination and solidarity, moved him. He believed her.

"Thank you. Good luck," Harry said with a nod.

The two of them disappeared down a hall, hugging the shadows just as they had been a moment before. Harry stood up straight. He rolled his shoulders back and planted his feet. With a breath, he calmed his breathing and focused on the moments in front of him. Harry blocked out the thoughts of the children at Godric's Hollow. He blocked out the thoughts of the terrified students that awaited him in the hall. He blocked out the overwhelming feeling of grief that was writhing inside of him. He solely focused on removing the Death Eaters that were bringing this kind of pain into the school. They had chosen their path and Harry would make sure that they received justice for it.

Hermione stood tall next to him. Their shoulders set and face grim. "You ready?" Harry asked quietly.

"Yeah,"

"I love you," Harry said, giving her hand a last squeeze.

"I love you too." She squeezed then released his hand. "Let's do this."

She took a step toward the door and looked over her shoulder at him with a side glance. She smiled for a second before she turned back to the giant door and raised her right hand. A swirl of magic hummed for a moment in the air before she turned her hand and pulled the threads of magic that she had tethered to the door. The doors blew off the hinges as Hermione pulled it toward her. Before the shards of wood and dust could hit himself and Hermione, she waved her hand and the debris flew around them harmlessly. Harry realized in awe, that it truly was _their_ magic now. Hermione was commanding it the same as he had. She was as beautiful as she was dangerous.

Now faced with an open entrance into the Great Hall, Harry and Hermione strode in, shoulder to shoulder. Their steps echoed in the now silent hall. The click of their boots against the stone floor seemed to bounce off the walls in the dead silence. Harry had to maintain his composure at the sight before him.

Seated at the Head table were all the professors as they were usually for a feast. Now, however, they were bound to their chairs with crude ropes cinched tight around them. The rigid postures that held them still indicated that they were being held in place by more than the ropes. Harry could see that more than a few of them had cuts and bruises visible even from across the room. The non-magical students huddled together at one end of the Gryffindor table. Just a few dozen had been held locked in the hall. Surrounding the students was a slew of Death Eaters in their traditional hoods and masks. The students' eyes lit upon seeing Harry and Hermione enter, hope to blossom on their terrified faces.

In the center of the room knelt Tonks. Her leg appeared broken in at least one place, and blood flowed freely from numerous cuts and slashes. Her wand was nowhere in sight, and she looked to be no shape to cast anything. She looked up from the floor to meet Harry's eyes. A faint flicker of a smile came over her face.

A bolt of energy whipped out from a Death Eaters wand and lashed her across the back again. Her skin opened up, and she bit her lip against the scream that wanted to burst forth.

"Good to see you arrived on schedule Potter," Lucius Malfoy said as he lowered his hood. "I've grown tired of torturing my cousin while waiting for you. Though not as much fun as it was to subdue that half-giant beast you call a friend."

Harry winced but refused to lower his wand or be distracted by the man's words. "Step away from her."

Hermione raised her wand to match Harry's. He could see her profile. She was ready to kill.

"Ah, and the whore who killed my son," Lucius fired a curse at Hermione that she batted away with a shield charm without breaking eye contact.

"I'm not a whore, but I did kill your son," Hermione said, narrowing her eyes at the memory.

Lucius's face flushed with fury. He pointed his wand at Tonks and fired a green curse that Harry recognized instantly. With a flick of his wand, Harry pulled the flagstone from the floor and deflected the curse into the ceiling.

Hermione whipped her wand around and fired a crackling red beam at Lucius. He didn't even flinch as a shield burst to life in front of him. A shorter Death Eater stepped in front of him silently. The hood was pulled far forward and their head was tilted down, throwing their face into total shadow.

The Death Eater calmly lowered themselves into a defensive posture in front of the blond-haired man.

"You see?" Lucius called, "True power is having others to fight your battles for you."

Harry didn't pause to correct him. He started firing curses forward as fast as he could. The first volley speared through the air but was deflected easily. The Death Eaters holding the students at the Gryffindor table didn't move. All seemed to be focusing on the limber Death Eater. Unlike the minions standing guard, the Death Eater facing them moved and spun away from their curses as fast as Harry and Hermione could throw them.

Not ten seconds into the duel, Hermione managed to slam two bludgeoning hexes down on top of each other. The first fell on the shield, shattering it. The second came down and broke the fighter's arm with a sharp snap. They grunted in pain for a second then spun to their feet and fired a curse faster than Harry thought possible with a broken arm.

The green lightning bolt blossomed to life, heading straight at Hermione. Her hair was still sweeping around her face from the momentum of throwing the bludgeoning hexes as the killing curse sailed towards her.

Not caring about the others in the hall seeing the Sword, Harry lurched forward and drew the sword off his back in a blur. With a mighty swing and a clash that seemed to crack the foundations of the castle the killing curse was flung off its trajectory and slammed straight into the chest of the Death Eater who had cast it.

The body flew back a few feet to land lifelessly at Lucius's feet.

Harry stood with the sword at his side and heaved a few deep breaths. "I guess you need more people to fight for you." Hermione fired off a curse towards Lucius to punctuate Harry's words.

With a lazy flick of his wand, a chair from a nearby table flew up to meet the curse in an explosion of wood and dust. Lucius locked eyes with Harry. His flinty grey eyes suddenly crinkled at the edges, and he burst into booming laughter. "Draco always said that you were predictable, but Potter, you have exceeded my wildest dreams."

With the tip of his boot, Lucius nudged the body at his feet towards Harry and Hermione. As the head lolled over to face them, long red hair spilled out and revealed a pair of freckled cheeks. Ginny's brown eyes stared blankly out at them.

Harry felt like the air had been sucked from his body. As if his eyes had been cleared from a fog, Harry could see that the small Death Eater had a female form. Harry was so focused on the empty eyes staring at him that he didn't move in time when the crackling black bolt of magic struck him in the side.

Harry felt himself get thrown backward and bounce off a bench before coming to a halt. His side was on fire. It felt like he had been hit by a bolt of lightning and all his muscles spasmed and clenched until he couldn't move. Hermione saw him tumble. Even before he had stopped moving, she whipped her wand around her head.

A look of dark determination enshrouded Hermione's face as she whipped the wand around her again. As her wand tip swished through the air, the fire from the torches around the room coiled into a writhing tide of blue fire. She swirled the roaring whip of fire around the room. With velocity that was almost too fast to follow the streak of crackling fire ripped through the Death Eaters standing around the table.

The half dozen Death Eaters that had been guarding the table were consumed within the arcs of flame. Their screams were piercing only for a moment before their flesh and life was incinerated off their bones.

Lucius fired curses into the field of blue fire that was approaching. As the fire turned its focus on him he pulled up one of the house tables, placing it between him and the fire like a wall. The fire shredded through the table with all the resistance of a spiderweb and swarmed the last few feet to overtake Lucius. Before he could be consumed, a mighty crack resounded throughout the entire castle. The sound wave reverberated through the hall with such force that windows exploded. The rush of air snuffed out the flames and Hermione's magical weapon vanished. Harry raised his hand to do what he could. Suddenly he held the falling shards of glass in place and transfigured them into the dust which he whisked out of the room.

"You're too late! The Dark Lord is here. You lose Potter," Lucius hissed before he fled into the passageway that Harry had gone down after his name had come out of the Goblet.

Harry groaned, the pain in his side finally fading a bit. His breathing was hitched, but he tried to push past the pain and stood back up. "Hermione, we have to get the students out of the Great Hall. He'll kill them!" Harry wheezed.

He slid the sword back into its sheath. With the Death Eaters removed from the room, the bonds and curses holding the teachers in place faded away. Released from their position, they immediately fled towards the students and comforting them. Hermione rushed over to Tonks. Harry tried to follow but was moving slowly. The pain in his side was causing spasms to go through him with each breath.

"Tonks are you alright?" Hermione panted.

Tonks spit out some blood. "I've been better."

"Can you stand?" Hermione asked.

"Yeah," Tonks said and stood up. She hissed at the pain from her back. Hermione immediately cast a charm on her back to keep the wounds in place. A charm that, ironically, Tonks had taught her.

McGonagall rushed over to him. "Mr. Potter, are you hurt?"

"We have to get everyone out. We can't defend the school and I can't face him right now," Harry said. Harry knew that if he faced Voldemort, he would be utterly obliterated, as would everyone in this castle.

McGonagall looked like she was going to argue with him for a moment, but she changed her mind. "I think you are right. The castle isn't as important as the people inside it."

"Hogwarts!" she called above the other voices. "Come to arms! Your students are in danger!" Headmistress Minerva McGonagall raised her hands to the sides and called to the castle itself. A burst of golden and scarlet magic seemed to cascade from her for a moment before a gong sounded somewhere deep in the castle. Suddenly suits of armor along the walls and through the entranceway burst to life.

As one they marched into defensive positions all through the school and surrounding the Great Hall.

"Where can we take the students?" Hermione asked quickly, the crashes and cracks from outside the castle starting to grow in ferocity. Voldemort would eventually work through those defenses, Harry was sure.

"Take them to Grimmauld," Harry said, thinking quickly.

"But are we sure it is safe?" Hermione fired back, McGonagall following the rapid exchange.

"We believe it is safe," the headmistress added in.

Tonks nodded to them as well.

"I own it. We can meet up there, and I'll make sure it's safe from here on out," Harry said, placing a hand to his now bleeding side. "We have to go."

McGonagall nodded curtly. "Hogwarts! Seal the doors and guide the children home!"

The walls shimmered and Harry could hear doors slamming shut along the halls. Harry realized that Neville and Luna might not be out of the castle yet, and he opened his mouth to warn the others when a voice sounded in his head. "Don't worry, I have already escorted them out of the castle Mr. Potter. You are the shield and I am the voice. I will guard the castle for when you return." The voice of the sorting hat was soft but clear in his mind, and he felt his body sag a little.

The wall behind the Griffindor table shimmered for a moment and the stones changed shape rapidly. A fireplace formed and a giant green fire burst to life. "We leave now! Follow me!" the Headmistress called to the students and professors and started to walk away.

"Send the help you can when you get to headquarters. Thank you both for what you did here today. I don't know how many lives you saved," she said gratefully to the pair.

"We will take Ginny's body back with us," Hermione said with a lump in her throat. Harry recoiled at the idea of having to face the Weasley's with this burden, but it was his and Hermione's burden to bear.

"I'm sorry I couldn't warn you in time about Ginny," Tonks said as Hermione sorrowfully knelt and gently picked up the girl's petite form. "He had me gagged. I can explain what happened later," Tonks said at the questions already forming on Harry's lips.

The castle shuddered again and the clangs of magic slamming into metal armor started to resound around the halls. The press of dark magic on the edge of Harry's senses seemed to increase with every second he stood here. It wouldn't be long before Riddle was in the room with them.

"We can use the floo after the others have left," Tonks shouted. The last few kids hit the fireplace, and they were the only ones left in the hall. "No need Tonks. Grab my shoulders," Harry commanded and a burst of flames and smoke poured into the Hall.

" _Go!_ " Harry heard the Sorting Hat yell in his head, the voice of Hogwarts urging him to flee to save her wards.

Tom stepped in the hall just as Harry locked eyes with him. Harry felt the unbounded focus of his rage in front of him. The red eyes of the twisted monster narrowed in recognition when they met Harry's green. Harry glared and let the rage ripple away from him. Sparks danced on his fingertips and down the blade of the sword.

He wanted Tom Riddle to know that Harry Potter was coming for him.

Then they vanished.

* * *

Harry stumbled directly into the middle of the living room of the Keep. Unlike the last time he had apparated into the room after a mission, he wasn't carrying Hermione's limp form. He felt a pang of shame as he thought of who Hermione was carrying.

"Mum!" Hermione called to the house. Pattering footsteps responded a second later as Jane came into view from up the stairs.

"Hermione!? What happened!? We thought you would have been back hours ago!" Jane said. Her voice faded as she saw her daughter slowly lowering the limp form of Ginny to the couch. In respectful silence, Hermione folded her hands over her chest and closed her eyes. Harry had never seen something as sorrowful as the motion of someone closing another person's eyes after death.

"Oh my god..." Jane whispered. "Dan! Harry and Tonks are hurt, bring our medical kit! Quick!" Jane barked over her shoulder finally absorbing the entire scene around her. Harry lowered himself to the floor rather ungracefully, trying to protect his burning side as he fell. The slump to the ground still knocked the wind out of his lungs no matter how he tried to cushion the fall.

Dan came pelting into the room holding a large medical bag and already pulling out potions and handing them to his wife.

"Who else is here?" Harry gasped as he allowed Dan to guide him into a horizontal position. "Someone needs to go to Zonko's. Neville and Luna are there with students…they need help…"

"No one right now," Dan said. "They all had to rush to the Ministry. There was some kind of attack."

The world started to swim around Harry a bit, and he blinked a few times to clear his sight. Harry felt weak. The Ministry was under attack too. Voldemort had unleashed a double attack. Just like his trap at Godric's Hollow. _I couldn't save everyone…_

"Harry, do you know what type of curse you were hit with?" Dan asked as he slid down onto his knees to check Harry's injuries. Jane was already tending to Tonks's wounds with Hermione's guidance.

"I don't. I know it was black though. Everything on that side of my body feels like fire," Harry said as Dan quickly cut and peeled the shirt off him. The pain was peaking enough for Harry to not care that he was getting his shirt peeled off in a room full of people. His thoughts of sending help to Grimmauld place fled his mind with the surges of pain.

"Black curses usually mean that they are a mix of a few things. Who hit you with it?" Dan said as he pulled bandages and salves out of the bag.

"Lucius Malfoy?" Harry coughed back, not understanding at all how that was relevant.

Dan reached over and started flipping through a well-worn notebook. "Alastor's notes say that Malfoy uses a lot of bone-breaking curses and many curses that cause necrosis of the flesh." He skimmed for a second more. "Ah-ha! Yes, this isn't the first time he has used it." Dan immediately started fishing for different bottles and tape from his bag with renewed vigor. He pulled a bottle out and spun it open with practiced hands. "You can thank Alastor for all the case files that he gave us to study. Roll over."

Harry obliged the fast-talking man. He could see Dan's eyes flick over to Hermione and Jane more than a few times, but after seeing his daughter in no danger, he resumed full focus on Harry. Dan touched the skin around the wound tenderly. There was a black spiderweb of veins spreading away from the impact site. Harry didn't need to be a healer to know that there was something vicious leaking into his body from the wound. Dan pressed his finger close to one of the spreading tendrils of blackness and Harry arched his back in pain.

"Hermione, how long before Madam Pomfrey can get here?" Dan asked.

"I'm not sure, but it isn't going to be quick. she was injured with the other teachers," Hermione responded, her wand not stopping its motions across Tonks' back. Tonks' wounds would not be able to be healed in time with just Jane and Dan's ministrations. The lacerations and broken bones needed to be attended to immediately. Blood replenishing potions would only do so much if the wounds were still bleeding. Hermione's concerned glance kept shifting to Harry but she seemed comforted that he was being cared for by her father.

"Alright Harry, listen to me. The curse is spreading from the inside. Pomfrey said that there was only one way to treat that without having a wand, and unfortunately, she isn't going to get here in time. If I don't get this poison out now, it will kill you before she gets here. It's too close to your heart," Dan said, placing a comforting hand on Harry's side. "This is going to hurt son."

Harry winced one more time, feeling the waves of heat and pain radiate away from the wound. Then he nodded.

The older man grimaced at him and returned the nod.

"Hermione, I'm going to need your spellwork for just a moment," Dan said calmly, cleaning a scalpel from his bag with a wipe.

"Go on, I can start to bandage some of her smaller wounds," Jane said, taking Hermione's place next to the young woman.

With a steady hand, Dan lowered the point down on to Harry's side. His world exploded into pain and lights. With her father's direction after he glanced at his notes, Hermione put a stabilizing spell on the wound that would keep the skin still. Hermione didn't have the precision that it would take the transfigure the poison out of his bloodstream as Madam Pomfrey would.

Daring a glance at Dan's hands, Harry watched as the man used the knife to cut small incisions around the wound. Where there were spreading tendrils of blackness, he made a small cut and the venomous ooze started to seep out of Harry. Deftly with the other hand, Dan used a cloth soaked in one of his salves to dab the blood and black tar away. Hermione whimpered softly when Harry's back arched in pain, holding tight to his hand while he rode out the waves of pain. The bubbling necrosis leaking out of him did not come without pain.

After what felt like an eternity, Dan straightened up. Most of the blackness was gone. Harry finally started to feel relief from the burning in his side. "Here, take these. They're for the pain," Dan said as he offered a few pills to Harry. He took them without a second thought.

Jane had Tonks sitting upright now and it looked like she had cleaned most of the blood from her face and head. "Why was Ginny there?" Harry asked the battle-torn woman.

"I was doing a quick check around the hall before the feast to make sure things were safe, and I found them in the room that Malfoy left through," Tonks said.

"Them?" Hermione asked.

Tonks nodded sadly. "Ginny was in the room with several other Slytherins. She must have been imperioused or something… the things she was doing she would never have done of her own free will."

Harry closed his eyes. He could tell how badly Tonks didn't want to tell him any more specifics. The things happening inside Hogwarts were apparently on a scale they had never been in all his time in the school. And this time he hadn't even known about it.

"When I got closer, I saw that Lucius was in there with them, and they stunned me. Before they knocked me out, I heard her asking Lucius if he had the Diary with him. She just kept asking," Tonks managed to get out between pained breaths.

Hermione was already in tears at the information. The horrors that Ginny had suffered through since her first year at Hogwarts had gone mostly unnoticed. It was no wonder she had reached out for a "hero" in Harry. From the age of eleven, she desperately had needed one. Mention of the diary rattled through Harry. Could the diary have had a lasting impact on her all this time? Tom reaching out for a little bit more control to surprise Harry with? The implications of that statement pained Harry greatly. Could the diary have acted as a mental link to Ginny? He had so many questions to ask, but as his eyes once again settled on Ginny's face, he lost the will to ask them. "We need to tell Molly and Arthur before they find out from someone else."

"I don't think there is anything we can do but wait until they get back from the Ministry," Tonks said. "I can't believe that he attacked both places at once."

"Hopefully the fact that he decided to go to Hogwarts in person, meant that he _didn't_ ever go to the Ministry," Hermione reasoned.

"Harry you really should rest," Dan said as Harry tried to stand up. Harry found that he had very little energy to resist the man's attempt to force him back down.

"You and Tonks should both close your eyes for a few minutes. The healing is a long process when it comes from the limited things we can do," Jane said as she placed a calming hand on Tonks's shoulder as well.

Harry wanted to stay alert, he wanted to wait and see Molly and Arthur, he wanted to hear what had happened in London. He wanted a great many things. But what he did was close his eyes and accept the blackness. Dan smiled and put a hand behind Harry's head. Guiding him back down to the floor gently. Harry felt an incredible sense of calm, knowing that Dan was there looking after him.

"Dan," Harry struggled to keep his eyes open. Dan looked him attentively. "I brought her back safe this time. Like I promised."

"That you did, that you did," Dan said softly, smoothing Harry's hair away from his eyes. "Rest now."

Harry, having never heard the comforting tone of a father, didn't hesitate to follow the instructions. The world was swallowed into darkness moments later.

* * *

Harry's eyes blearily opened to the sound of yelling and footsteps. The previous hours came rushing back to him, and he checked the clock on the wall to find that only two hours had passed.

Harry realized he was laying on a couch now. Dan must have moved him after he had passed out. He felt gingerly at his side. Harry felt a pang of pain spread from his side, but nothing like he had felt earlier. He marveled at the brilliance of Dan having that dossier on all the Death Eater habits.

He made to swing his legs over the side of the couch when a hand came from behind him and gently laid itself on his chest. Harry craned his neck around to see that his head was laying on Hermione's lap, and she was looking down at him with a small smile.

"Stay still Harry, you are still healing," she said softly. The hand on his chest rubbed small circles in a comforting way. Harry couldn't help but lay his head back and look up at Hermione.

"Are people getting back now?"

"Yes, Remus got back not long ago... Molly and Arthur should be here in a moment," Hermione said and her eyes tightened around what was to come.

"The Ministry?"

Hermione bit her lip. "He took complete control of the Ministry and Hogwarts concurrently. Not many were able to get out of the Ministry in time. Riddle has complete control over the floo network and the government...and the school."

Harry closed his eyes. "Were Luna and Neville able to make it out?"

"Remus sent some people to Zonkos to find out, but they haven't come back yet," Hermione said.

Footsteps interrupted them. Harry braced himself physically and emotionally. He slid himself into a sitting position despite Hermione's hand on him. Each footfall brought the parents closer to their slain child.

"Remus, just tell us what happened!" Arthur said in a furious tone.

"Arthur... I'm just so sorry," Remus said helplessly as the three came into the room. Ginny's prone form lay on the opposite couch.

Harry had expected the parents to run to their daughter upon seeing her. Instead, Harry watched as time seemed to flow around them. The flickers of the firelight seemed to freeze in place, etching the changing expressions of the Weasley parents into harsh relief. As Harry watched, he thought he could see the permanent lines of grief and pain etch their way across their features as years and years were added to their souls at the loss of their child.

Arthur and Molly walked over to Ginny. Molly was the first to make a noise. A small cough. A gentle intake of breath. Then she crashed to her knees and begin to let the sobs and wails burst from her. " _Not my baby girl! No, No No!_ " Molly screamed as she laid her head across Ginny's midsection loosing torrents of tears for her only daughter.

Arthur finally stumbled to his knees as well. No longer able to support himself, Arthur leaned forward to press his cheek to Ginny's forehead. His trembling hand rose to press the locks of hair from her face. Tears streamed down his face as he slowly stroked her hair, "My princess, my darling princess... I'm so sorry. _So sorry, so sorry, so very sorry._ "

Remus came over to Harry and Hermione silently and helped Harry to his feet. The pain was intense for a second, but with Remus's support, he was able to stand. The grieving parents didn't even notice them leave the room. Harry thought that was for the best.

Remus and Hermione helped Harry get up the stairs and to his room. The bed felt blessedly soft beneath him, but it brought no comfort. The grief-stricken faces of the Weasley parents burned into his mind like acid.

"Is it true?" Harry rasped. His voice didn't seem to work the way he thought it should. "He has control now?" Harry wasn't asking because he didn't believe Hermione. He just needed to hear it one more time.

"Yes," Remus said quietly. He was still blinking tears back from the corners of his eyes. "He took the Ministry when there was virtually no one there. He had people on the inside as we thought. Riddle walked in and took the entire place very quickly. He took the Minister's office and the floo network first. From what we understand, Unspeakable Croaker was able to lock down the Department of Mysteries before Riddle got there."

"What happened at Godric's Hollow?" Hermione asked. Harry felt himself fading again but he needed to know. _I couldn't save everyone…_

"No more Infiri came out after Harry destroyed the first wave of them. Either the trap faded when you left, or you destroyed the trap completely. I stayed long enough to bandage a few people, but I there wasn't much I could do for most of them," Remus said.

Harry didn't say anything. Both he and Hermione stared at Remus until he answered the question he knew they were waiting for.

"Close to twenty people lost their lives. There was nothing more you could have done Harry," Remus tried to soften the blow, but Harry had already heard enough. The room started to spin at the edges.

"We never should have gone," Harry whispered. He had known that there was likely a trap there. But he had thought, arrogantly, that the trap would be focused on him. His growing confidence with the sword had skewed his perception. He had expected the danger focused on him, not on massive collateral damage. "I'm a fool."

"There was no way we could have known that he would have set a trap to attack the town. You did everything you could, more than most ever could have," Hermione said, trying to get Harry's attention. Her attempts failed as Harry felt the world start to fall away into the misty darkness.

Harry blinked a few times and threw a hand over his eye, blocking the morning sunlight. He felt his chest pull towards his left side and remembered the wound. The pull was tight but it wasn't a sharp pain anymore. Harry was astounded to find only a burned scar on his side wrapping around to his back. He reminded himself to thank Dan profusely the next time he saw him.

He slid his legs over the side of the bed and wiggled his toes testing out all the different parts of his body for more injuries from the night before. Finding none, he groped around for his glasses and looked around the room.

Hermione sat on the floor with her back to the door. Her knees were pulled up close to her chest, and she had a frozen look on her face.

"Hermione," Harry said. "What's wrong?"

"Are you feeling ok?" she asked quietly, eyes not moving from the spot on the far wall.

"Yeah I'm feeling a lot better," he answered quickly. "Seriously, what's wrong?"

Hermione finally looked mournfully at Harry. Then she replied, in a voice hardly above a whisper, "Ron woke up this morning."

* * *

**End of Part 1**


	15. Chapter 15: Guilt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: I feel like I should apologize. I have been gone for a few weeks. With some things come up in home life it was hard to find as much time as I wanted to work on this chapter. But also because I have come to the realization that the middle section of this fic is just not up to snuff! There are some things I want to change and some sections I want to re-write completely to tell the story better for you all. So there may come times when the chapters are a little longer to come out, and I might not hid deadlines like I used to, BUT the story will be better for it. As annoying as it is, for the sake of the story, I really want to make sure I do it right. So I profusely apologize for leaving you all in a lurch. I assure you, this is not abandoned, I'm just taking some extra time to make sure it is worth it!
> 
> Thank you to my wife for editing this for me as always and being encouraging enough to help me post these. My friends from all over the world in the Harmony Discord server, I can't thank you enough for your support and help with my writing all the time.
> 
> I hope you enjoy the start of part 2!

**PART TWO**

**Chapter 15: Guilt**

" _The worst guilt is to accept an unearned guilt." - Ayn Rand_

* * *

Remus closed the door behind Harry and Hermione. He closed his eyes and leaned against the wall next to the room. He had never seen Harry look so broken before. He had been present for so many of Harry's lowest moments, but this was quite possibly the worst. The level of pain on Harry's face was unparalleled in Remus's memory. Harry had tried so hard. He had done so much. He had saved so many lives tonight. Students, teachers, children, parents. But he hadn't saved all of them.

Remus heaved a shuddering breath. This was the last and hardest lesson that he knew the kids were going to have to learn about war, and it wasn't one he could teach. He had shared with them some of the worst things about the last war. About loss, and grief, and fear. But this was something that no amount of explanation was ever going to prepare Harry for. There were times when despite all your best efforts, the battle was going to be lost. Remus thought back to all the people that he had lost in the first war. Loved ones, family, friends. And yet he had survived.

Remus's worst nightmares were coming true in this war. Watching Harry fight the war that his parents had died to end, was slowly eating Remus up inside. It didn't seem fair to lose your best friends in a sacrifice to end a war and save their son, only to have the same war come back fifteen years later and try to take the last bit of that family that was left.

The bile rose in the back of his throat. He willed it back down, forcing himself to calm. Since the end of the first war, Remus had been paralyzed by the guilt of being the last one left. Why him? The Ministry labeled him a dark creature. He was shunned everywhere he went. Why, of the entire group, was he the one left alive? James and Lily would have changed the world. They were just those kinds of people. Sirius would have reformed house Black into something to be proud of. And yet here Remus Lupin stood, reviled by the magical community, and with no one left to turn to.

The panic rose again and he pressed it back, fighting to restrain the dark thoughts and swirling fears. He kept his face calm and features still. He forced his breathing to level and tried to clear his mind. Since he had been bitten, Remus had vowed to retain as much control as he possibly could - he battled the wolf constantly beneath the surface, and once a month, he would lose. Most thought him calm and unwavering, when in reality, he was anything but.

Footsteps sounded mournfully up the stairs. Arthur's blank eyes met Remus's war-torn stare and for a moment they both remained silent, Remus acknowledged the other man's pain - silent and respectfully.

Arthur's voice cracked when he finally spoke. "Would it be alright if we brought Ron here from the Burrow? I want my family all together right now," Arthur asked.

"Of course Arthur," Remus rasped, finding his voice again. "I'll sleep easier knowing that you are all here safe."

Remus led Arthur down the hall to a large empty bedroom.

"Thank you." Arthur made to leave the room to find Molly but hesitated. "Do you know what happened?"

His question hung in the air on marionette strings. "Tonks believes that Lucious Malfoy was taking advantage of the mental damage that she suffered while controlled by the diary. Her actions in all this weren't her own," Remus said slowly and carefully.

A tear leaked down Arthur's face. "Mental damage? I thought she was fine. If I had known it had hurt her, I could have done something… I could have helped her."

It wasn't phrased as a question. "Arthur, I don't kn-"

"Be honest with me Remus - could I have helped her?" His face twisted in grief.

Remus's voice wavered. "I honestly don't know. The diary turned out to be much more powerful than Albus expected. None of us realized it could have lasting effects."

Arthur's Adam's apple bobbed. "How," his voice failed. "How did she die?" he whispered.

Remus's eyes pinched shut. "Lucious had her dressed as a Death Eater. He made her attack Harry and Hermione while they were trying to get the students out of the Great Hall." Remus paused, not knowing how Arthur would react to the rest of the story. Not even knowing if Harry was safe being in the same house as the grieving father after he knew Harry had directly caused his daughter's death. But he had the right to know the truth.

"She fired the killing curse at Hermione and Harry blocked it with his sword. Then it rebounded back on Ginny."

Arthur's face crumbled. Remus didn't know what he could say to comfort the man at this moment. "I'm sure that if Harry ha-"

"I know."

Silence permeated the air for a minute more before Arthur nodded slowly. "Thank you for telling me," he said softly before he left the room. His footsteps echoing as mournfully as they had when he approached.

* * *

Tonks was feeling the lashes across her back start to fade into a dull throbbing pain. Allowing cuts and gashes to heal was particularly difficult for her. With her body constantly changing, keeping a strong will about her shape and appearance was key. For the skin to heal properly, even with potions, she needed to keep her appearance steady. As a child, this had been more difficult, but she had gotten better at it over time. Still ruddy difficult though.

She leaned back against the headboard of her bed. After spending some time with Pomfrey, she had finally gotten healed up enough to find a comfortable resting position. She felt the strong urge to sleep, to close her eyes and forget the things that had happened tonight. The beating. Seeing the fear on the student's faces. She reminded herself that even with the horror that had been Hogwarts this evening, it had been nothing compared to what Remus had faced at Godric's Hollow.

Tonks cared so much for the older man, but he refused to accept her feelings. He was trying to protect her from what he was, and she could respect that, but it was still her choice to be with him if she wanted. And he was what she wanted. With every passing day, she could swear she felt her feelings for him grow. If only he would stop stubbornly pushing her away! She was starting to feel the sting of rejection. A woman could only be rebuffed so many times.

She brushed the intrusive thoughts aside. Now was not the time to lament her personal life. The world had shifted under their feet tonight. Tonks turned her thoughts to her students. They had rescued as many as they could out of the castle before Voldemort had arrived. She hoped that the other students had been sent to their dorms because he didn't want to hurt the children of his followers. The ones that had been in danger, she had managed to protect until help had gotten there. In the few weeks of teaching, she had found herself strongly connected to the children that had graced her classroom.

A soft knock came at the door. "Come in," she said softly but clearly.

Remus walked into the room, his face drawn and tired.

"How are you feeling?" he asked blearily. Emotional and physical exhaustion seemed to be working into all of his features.

"I've been worse. I'm more worried about you," Tonks said softly. His pain was so clear on his face that she couldn't help but absorb some of it. Fear for her students clung to her heart for a moment. She hoped they were safe.

"What happened to Neville and Luna? Did they ever make it back to Grimmauld Place?" Tonks asked. She had grown quite fond of so many of the students in the past few months, especially Neville and Luna. Many times she had joined their study sessions in the library disguised as another student so they could discuss the news of the castle.

"Yes, McGonagall called on the mirror. She was able to get them all out of the joke shop before any of the Death Eaters made it to Hogsmeade. They're safe."

Tonks felt a giant weight inside her lift if even a tiny bit. She could still see the looks of fear and desperation on the students' faces as the Death Eaters had ripped her away from them. She scrunched her eyes shut from the images she was seeing in her mind's eye.

_"Ms. Akela! Don't let them take me!" a young student, looking terrified and panicked, screamed for her help._

She blinked a few times and realized that a few tears had leaked out of the corners of her eyes. Even with the false name she had given the children at the start of the school year, it didn't lessen the impact.

"How are you doing?" She asked softly, moving her thoughts away from her own experiences.

"I don't know. Honestly, I don't." Remus sank down on the edge of her bed.

So many things had happened tonight: Godric's Hollow had been attacked, Hogwarts had been taken, and the Ministry was now controlled by Voldemort. No one person in the group had seen all the events take place. Thankfully, according to Mad-Eye, the Ministry coup wasn't as bloody as she thought it would be. A late evening on a holiday that was heavily celebrated in the magical community had made for a very empty building. Remus had seen the worst death toll of the night at Godric's Hollow. The bits and pieces of the evening that she had pieced together all collided in her thoughts.

"Have Molly and Arthur decided if they are going to bring Ron here?" Tonks understood their hesitation to be in the house with others while they were grieving. That didn't stop the Keep from being much safer for the rest of their family than they were at the Burrow.

"I think they are going to bring everyone here. This house is pretty big and it is their safest option at this point. As safe as we can make it, at least," Remus said sadly.

"Remus." Her breath caught. "I failed them."

"No," Remus said strongly, despite his exhaustion. "You will _not_ take responsibility for something Lucius Malfoy did."

"I was there, and I couldn't save anyone. I was there _to protect them_ and I failed at the only thing I was there to do. How am I supposed to take that? Ginny is _dead_ because I didn't notice until it was too late!" Tonks felt the heat rise around the collar of the loose shirt that Madam Pomfrey had given her. This was the first chance she was getting to speak about and think back to what had happened tonight with someone.

"Dora...please, stop," Remus said in a kind hushed tone. "No one in this house is to blame for Ginny's death. Not at all. Not me, not you, not Harry, and not Hermione. Harry told me what happened. Malfoy is to blame for this and him alone."

"They didn't train us for this, you know," Tonks said, her eyes looking away. Her years at the academy had been spent learning how to properly file paperwork and process the minutia of day to day life in a small law enforcement office. Their numbers had been cut so low during the last few years that it was a miracle that Tonks had kept her job at all. She assumed that her ability to change appearance had something to do with her job security. But now...Tonks suddenly realized with a mixture of relief and sadness that she didn't have a job to go back to.

"Not that it matters, because we lost the Ministry, but this wasn't in the tests or manuals. I was trained to bring in criminals. I came to the Order because Mad-Eye trusted me and I wanted to help my cousin...I guess what I'm trying to say is, _I'm lost_ ," Tonks heaved a shuddering breath after admitting her fear. She was known as the chipper one, the one to bring a laugh, but that was a standard that no one could hold all the time.

Remus turned toward her and gently put a hand over hers. "It's going to be alright. I wasn't trained for it either. To be honest, the way I handled it the first time was to run. I ran as far as I could after James and Lily died. Sirius was gone as well and I was suddenly alone in the space of a few days. I couldn't handle the grief."

"Did it help? The running?"

"No," He sighed, "no it did not." Remus looked down at the floor again. "I was so buried in my grief that I forgot about Harry. I missed out on his entire childhood because I ran from my pain. I was as lost as anyone could be."

He smiled at her, warmth and kindness in his eyes. "You, Nymphadora Tonks, will never be lost when you have peo-" he cut off mid-speech. "When you have _me_ around to hold your hand."

Tonks' heart wavered. A shimmer of warmth fled through her body at his words. To her surprise, she felt her hair shorten and she knew that if she had a mirror, she would see her natural appearance right now.

"You," she paused for emphasis, "are the person I want holding my hand, all the time," Tonks said.

Remus seemed to realize his mistake and tried to backstep. "Dora, I'm flattered, I am. But you know what I am. It's not safe." Remus pleaded. He had come to the conclusion a long time ago that he was falling in love with the girl, but he had talked himself out of pursuing it for a plethora of reasons that he wasn't quite able to remember at the moment.

"The world isn't safe. You make me feel safe, you make me feel good about myself inside. You don't see my powers as a way to change who I am at a whim, or anything else, you just see me, a person with a useful gift. There aren't many others out there that would understand that. I don't have to hide or be someone else when I'm around you. Are you going to take that away from me?" Tonks said pressing down on his shoulder so he couldn't get up without throwing her off of him forcefully.

Remus started to sputter and Tonks just rolled her eyes. Whipping her shirt over her head and leaning down over top of him now topless she asked again. "Are you going to take that away from me?"

"Err. No." Remus said before leaning up and kissing her soundly.

* * *

The silence in the house was deafening. The all-encompassing lack of noise seemed to fill him up and leave him empty at the same time. Taking a few steps into the living room, even the click of his boots only seemed to crack the silence only slightly. The inhabitants of the house long asleep, he couldn't help but be grateful that they were finally getting to close their eyes against the doomscape that the world had turned into. He envied them, but he continued.

The steps creaked slightly as he took them instinctually searching out the room he was looking for. Even the creaks didn't seem to reach through the silence to his ears properly. The hallway seemed to stretch into a few different directions but he followed his feet, letting each one fall in front of the other.

Finally, at the end of the hall, he found the room he knew he was looking for. A small beam of light shone from under the door, unlike all the other dark bedrooms along the walls. A flickering fireplace forming a warm glow under the door. He approached as quietly as he had been creeping through the rest of the house, not even sure if he could break the silence if he tried.

If they had heard him come down the hall, they made no move to intercept his path or come to check. While the safety concerns over that behavior were worrying, under the circumstances he didn't blame them. With one child grievously injured and another struck down completely, the parents shouldn't be expected to be behaving coherently.

He knew that only a few more steps would take him face to face with the grieving family, so he took a moment to steady himself. Rolling his shoulders one last time and squaring them as best he could. He wasn't sure what the reaction to his presence would be, regardless of their reception of him, he needed to be here. It was the right thing to do. If for nothing else, he had always attempted to do what was right. There had been those who had disagreed with him, as was their right, but that didn't stop him from trying.

He stepped around the corner to face the familiar group of the red-haired Weasley family.

Molly was the first to look up at him and meet his eyes. Tears stained her cheeks and there was a hollowness to her gaze that struck him deep inside. The usual fire and fervor that had danced behind her eyes were gone, replaced with a bleakness that matched the silence he had previously experienced. As their eyes locked, new tears formed and pooled in her eyes, her face breaking into one of grief-ridden relief. "Hello Mum," he whispered, trying to remain untouched by her sadness. He wasn't sure if he had the right to expect more than that.

Her face seemed to crumple in on itself as she rose from the chair and stepped forward. She collapsed into his arms and they sunk to the floor despite his best attempts to hold her upright, Molly now sobbing in earnest.

"Thank Merlin, my baby boy has come back to me," The words were punctuated with sobs, tears staining the front of his robes. He found that for the first time he didn't much care. He simply stood there and held his mother as she sobbed.

His father stepped up behind him and placed a hand on his shoulder. "It's good to see you again Percy."

After his mother's tears had subsided for a time, the group moved slightly away from the bed holding his youngest brother. Percy did his best to not continually glance over at his still form on the bed. Percy felt a spear of pain seeing that his mother had tucked a Weasley sweater next to Ron's form and she had been keeping his face clean-shaven. How had he taken her motherly love for granted so easily?

Next to him on a second bed that had been conjured was a small form under a white sheet. Momentarily he lost control of his entire self as the grief waved through him. His _sister_ was gone.

"Listen," Charlie said gruffly. "I am of course grateful that you managed to make it out of the Ministry unharmed and it is good to see you again,"

The twins stood. Fred and George silently taking places behind their fathers' shoulders. The looks on their faces were almost unrecognizable to Percy. There was no spark in their eyes either. They had not forgotten Percy's words. And he didn't expect them to.

"But," Charlie resumed, glancing for a second at the identical siblings to his left. "Why are you here? Did you want to be here when Ron woke up so you could tell him you were right?" Charlie's words cut deeper than Percy would have thought.

While he had always had his disagreements with his younger siblings, he had always admired his older brothers. Charlie going off into the world to follow what he loved and Bill doing the same. Breaking free of the family home and starting their own lives, with the backing and pride of their parents. When Percy had pursued the things he had loved, his parent's reaction to them had been a bit more lukewarm. They were, of course, overjoyed at his grades and academic achievements, but he knew that his path wasn't the same as his brothers. His aspirations bored the rest of the spit fire family. Over the years he had accepted that and moved on. Understanding that they didn't appreciate what he loved, but as all parents do, they supported him nonetheless even though they didn't understand it. Charlie and Bill had always been encouraging, telling him to follow his dreams. It was just difficult because his idea of dreams was so drastically different from the rest of the family's ideas.

This past year had been the most difficult. Without contact with his parents and his brothers, he had felt adrift. He had buried himself in his work, looking up from his proverbial desk only when he was required to. His job encompassed his entire life, he finally could focus on the things he loved without anyone judging him for it. And yet, he had felt empty at the end of each day. There was no mother to dote on him and try to feed him more, something that had always annoyed him. No father to prattle on about silly things from the office. No brothers to fill his drink with potions or to charm his clothes to do funny things. He had never admitted it, but those were the things that balanced his love of government work. Without that counterbalance, the work became dry and tedious. Inclinations or not, he was a Weasley deep down and there would always be a part of him that reveled in the chaos of day to day life.

He had always held out hope that his older brothers had understood and forgiven him for the things he had said. However, when Bill's wedding had come and gone with no invitation, he knew it was time to let go of that hope. The Weasley's loved in their way, harsh, and fierce, and incredibly protective of their own. Percy had prepared himself for this confrontation with his oldest siblings, but he hadn't expected it to hurt as much as it did.

Percy closed his eyes for a brief moment and sucked in a breath, steadying himself. "Charlie, I understand your concern, but no. That is not why I am here." Scrubbing a hand across his eyes, Percy looked away, trying to clear a path for his thoughts to make sense.

"I'm here to say, I'm sorry," Percy said, not opening his eyes. "I was afraid for them. I was afraid for them because I had seen the way things in the school were going. Bullying out of control, blood purity being spouted in the hallways. I was scared for them, but I realize now that the way I went about it was all wrong. I should never have said those things, especially after everything Harry had done for the family already. I was wrong," He looked around the room and saw that his family was nonplussed.

"You have every right to be angry at me, to be wary of me, and to not want me here. My behavior over the last year was deplorable and…and I understand if you want me to leave. I have a letter," He pulled the note out of his pocket. "I would rather speak to Ron in person, but I can leave it if need be. I will never…" His voice broke harshly and he realized that he was going to lose the iron grip of control he had over his emotions. "I will never get a chance to apologize to my sister for my actions, and I just want…" He took a shuddering breath. "I just want to tell Ron how sorry I am before I lose that chance too," He put his face in his hands hiding his tears and his face, all semblance of calm and control now gone. "My baby sister is gone and I'll never get to tell her how much I loved her, I don't want to lose that chance for my brother too," The words finally fell out of him, quickly followed by the sorrow he had been bottling up since he had heard the news.

With his face still in his hands, he didn't see his brother approach him. Charlie's burly arms surrounded him in a hug. "Welcome home, brother," The tenderness that only an older sibling can have, evident in his voice. Charlie's deep voice bringing memories of their childhood flooding back to Percy. The times that the twins had pranked him and Charlie had defended him. The times that he had bandaged him up after Percy had fallen and hurt himself trying to keep up with Charlie and Bill.

His father had always worked hard to provide for the family and his mother had her hands full running the house and keeping up with the antics of the twins and Ginny. Charlie and Bill had always been there for him, to have them accept him back was everything he could ask for.

* * *

Jane sipped her tea and glanced at the other cup on the table. The cup was still warm, but the steam had stopped rising from the top. Jane considered for a moment if she had misjudged the situation, but immediately dismissed it. She knew her daughter.

The quiet that enshrouded the house now seemed to be of something other than sound. The air itself in the house felt heavy like something was slowly working its way through the air and into all of their psyches. Ginny had died, and despite the hurtful way that she had treated Hermione before she had left for Hogwarts, the death of a child was always something to mourn. The pain that Molly and Arthur must be going through was something she couldn't bear to even imagine.

Jane remembered her terror the night that Harry had appeared in the house cradling Hermione's body. It felt like her heart stopped until she realized that her daughters' was still beating, The anguish that had rocketed through her body was so intense that she vibrated even thinking about it.

Hermione had almost died tonight. The curse that had taken Ginny's life had been aimed at her daughter first. Harry, being who he was, had saved Hermione without a second thought. But Ginny's death was going to weigh on him terribly. Jane felt the least she could do to thank him for saving Hermione again was to help him through that. If only she knew how.

The years had not been kind to Harry, she knew that. Jane remembered the look on his face early in the summer when he had first shown up in their house. Scared, lost, confused, and grieving. Skip ahead to the man he had become since then and it was a transformation like she had never seen. The scared teenager was no more, and slowly rising from that was a young man resembling a hero from the storybooks. As a little girl, she had read stories of knights and princesses, just like any other girl. She had dreamed of a knight coming to sweep her away and declare his love, just like every other little girl.

As she had grown, she had learned that those kinds of things don't happen quite like that. When Jane had met Dan, she realized that knights in shining armour sometimes looked like dentists.

For Hermione though, her knight in shining armour had a _sword_ and _magic_. The fairy tales weren't tales to Hermione. The dreams of a knight showing up to save the day were coming true. Unfortunately, along with the heroism from the stories came the pain that was usually left out of those tales. This kind of evil and death and _war_ was something left out of those books. Jane knew why now. Because this side of war was something she had never stopped to think about for more than a moment. It was something that had fallen to the periphery of her thoughts, something from history books, or for other countries. The state of war wasn't something she was used to contemplating and yet now she found it to be a core aspect of her life.

A few months ago she and Dan had been cleaning children's teeth. Now, a few hours ago, she had watched her husband drain dark magic out of Harry's body. Her hands had been coated in blood trying to stem the gashes on Tonks' back. This was not the life that she had been living at the start of the summer. Jane sometimes couldn't believe how quickly she and Dan had fallen into the routine of being field medics. Alastor had even told her and Dan that there very well could come a time when he would need them to be out in the field with the rest. It hadn't taken Dan long to agree, and she had followed in kind a few seconds later.

Hermione was at the center of this, and Jane was determined to be there with her daughter until the last second. If Hermione was going to spearhead this fight, be part of the center mass propelling her world into a better future...well then Jane was going to be right there behind her daughter the entire way. Dental practices, card games with friends, fancy dinner dates with her husband. Those things were all gone, but she still had her daughter and her husband, and even Harry.

 _Hermione should be down any minute now. I'm sure she waited for everyone else to be asleep, but I know her. She isn't sleeping._ Jane thought to herself.

A few minutes later, Hermione gently padded her way into the kitchen.

"Hello sweetheart," Jane said softly as Hermione slid into the room with a small glowing sphere of light hovering above her hand. Jane never grew tired of seeing the magical power that her daughter could conjure with a thought. It always filled her with a sense of such wonder.

Hermione looked over to her mother sitting at the table and the cup of tea already waiting for her. She heaved a small sigh and a quirk twitched at the corner of her mouth.

"You came down later than I expected," Jane said while blowing on her cup before taking another sip of the hot tea.

"Harry seemed to have a tough time staying asleep. He had a few nightmares and I didn't feel right leaving him. I gave him a dreamless sleep potion, so I hope it keeps him peaceful through the night." Hermione sat down and wrapped her hands around the cup in front of her.

"Do you want to talk about what happened tonight?" Jane respected that Hermione might not want to, but as her mother, she was going to offer anyways.

"I don't think..." she bit her lip. "Yes, I do."

Jane listened to her daughter's tale about her evening. The horrors that had happened at Godric's Hollow after visiting the graves of Harry's parents. The fear and panic at Hogwarts at seeing the peril of the students and teachers in the hands of the Death Eaters. The killing curse being hurled at her, and Ginny being revealed. Hermione shed no tears, but the corners of her eyes pulled sharply as she spoke. The young woman in front of her was hurting deeply, but she was focused and determined.

"I'm so sorry honey. I can't imagine how you feel right now."

"The thing is mum, I can't figure out what I feel either. There is a man in the other room that saved my life twice tonight. He saved so many lives and I am so proud of him and filled with how much I love him and his bravery. And at the same time, I am filled with this...anger at myself for making him do that to Ginny. If I hadn't been caught by surprise, then Harry wouldn't have had to deflect that curse. I feel like I killed her just as much as Lucius did," Hermione's voice grew fainter and fainter as she followed her words into the pit of her grief.

"That man upstairs loves you so very much that he was willing to do the supposedly impossible to protect you. You didn't make him do it. If it had been reversed, would you believe your own words if it was Harry saying them?" Jane asked her daughter pointedly.

Hermione looked very conflicted. She took some sips from her tea before responding. "No, I would do that for him a thousand times over before watching him die."

"Exactly. What happened tonight was horrible beyond words. But please don't beat yourself up for someone else's choice. You've been through enough without that." Jane placed her hand on top of Hermione's to soothe the slight trembling that had started there.

"How do I face them?" There was no need to specify who Hermione was referring to.

"They are grieving. They might need time. But in the end, I think they will understand that there was nothing you or Harry could have done."

"That's the thing that I am worried about most," Hermione said. "I don't know who Harry is going to be when he wakes up. Is he going to be drowning in self-loathing, or is he going to wake up determined to rush out and fight? I just don't know who is going to walk out of that bedroom tomorrow morning."

"Harry is going to walk out of that bedroom hon," Jane said with a light chuckle. "Harry will come out of that bedroom and either way he is going to need you. If he is down you are going to need to hold his hand and bring him up. If he is ready to fly into battle, you'll need to hold his hand and make him think. And rest."

Hermione smiled briefly and sighed. "You're right. I just hope that I can do that for him."

"I know you can, and I know that Harry loves you enough to try to do the same for you," Jane said.

Hermione opened her mouth to say more but was interrupted by the stamping of harsh footsteps coming from the stairs outside the kitchen.

Bill skidded into the kitchen, his face looking wild and exhausted all at the same time. Jane had observed Bill to be very even-keeled and the look on his face brought her to high alert. Although Hermione had stiffened at the sight of Bill, he seemed not to even notice her presence. Instead, with panic in his voice, he sputtered, "Jane, I need your help. Ron is starting to wake up."

"What?!" Hermione gasped.

"He has moved his hand a few times, but he hasn't opened his eyes. I don't think we can get in touch with Madam Pomfrey right now, What do we do?" Madam Pomfrey had already had a busy night healing different Order members that had fought at the Ministry.

"I'll grab my bag and meet you upstairs. Right now the thing we need to do is monitor his vital signs and make sure that he isn't having trouble staying conscious when he wakes up fully. I'll bring Pomfrey's list of monitoring charms for you to cast for me," Jane said as she rose from the table.

Bill nodded and swept from the room back up the stairs as Hermione began to speak in a hurried tone. "Mum, I don't think I can help you. I'm not ready to go into that room."

"It's ok. Let me handle this part. You go rest, be with Harry. I will take care of Ron and make sure that he wakes up safely. You go take care of yourself. I got this," Jane said as she wrapped her arms around Hermione's shoulders and steered her towards the door.

Hermione resisted for a moment before propelling her feet forward on her own. Hermione spun around and threw her arms around Jane. "Thanks, mum."

Jane pulled away, smiled, put a hand on Hermione's cheek, and admired her daughter for a second. Then she kissed her forehead with a tenderness she could never have expressed in words and, with a last quick smile at her daughter, hurried away to help Ron.

* * *

Hermione slid into the dark bedroom. She heard the patter of footsteps rush down the hall just as she hushed the door closed behind her. Her eyes took a second to readjust to the darkness in the room. With a thought, she bloomed to life in her hand the small sphere of light that she had let wink out earlier. In its simple glow, Hermione could see the soft outline of Harry laying in the bed gently breathing up and down.

She let go of a shuddering slow breath. Her flight up the stairs and spike of panic from contemplating seeing Ron right now was enough to make her heart race. She leaned against the wall and took in another breath. Slowly, Hermione repeated this until she felt her muscles start to loosen and her mind began to clear. She was glad that she had gotten a chance to speak with her mother. Hermione could feel some of the cobwebs in her mind start to clear and her mother's words started to sink in.

Sliding her back down the wall until she reached the floor, Hermione continued to breathe and think. She felt so weary. So tired. So drained.

She took another deep breath and wrapped her arms around her legs, pulling them close. And with one long exhale, she laid her head down across her arms, and finally fell asleep.

"Did you hear me, Harry?" Hermione asked softly. Harry's face hadn't changed since she had told him that Ron was awake. She had expected more of a reaction from him.

He blinked a few times and then nodded slightly. "Do..." he paused. "Do they know if his magic is gone or not?"

"I don't think so. He was only just starting to wake up a few hours ago when I fell asleep here. I don't know if he is all the way awake now," Hermione said, unfurling herself from the floor and feeling her back and joints complain about the hours spent on the floor.

Harry was sitting up in the bed now as well. The blankets and sheets made a small pool around his waist that made him look like something out of a movie. The nasty spell damage that was still visible on his side only added to the effect.

"We should go see him," Harry said.

"Are you ready to stand and start moving around?" Hermione asked.

"After sleeping, I'm feeling loads better honestly. I'm not sure what your dad did last night, but my side feels amazing."

"Let me see."

Hermione stood and approached Harry quickly, preventing him from standing and escaping her inspection. She gently moved his arm out of the way and laid the pads of her fingertips to the skin surrounding the wound. "Didn't my dad use stitches last night?"

"Yeah, why?"

"They're gone."

Harry blinked a few times. Hermione's bewildered eyes rose to meet his. He was as confused as she was. "Did he use a special thread or something?"

"No, I don't think so. Well, it looks a lot better than it did last night. I suppose without Madam Pomfrey around to tell you to stay in bed, there isn't anything I can do to make you stay in bed, is there?" Hermione asked with almost a smile. The pain she was feeling seemed to be alleviated with Harry's presence.

He nodded to her and slowly stood. Suddenly words started to tumble out of his mouth. "Thank you for having my back last night. I wish I could have saved more people, but I did the best I could. You know I did everything I could right?" His voice was unsure. He was desperately seeking her support and validation.

"Harry, we did everything in our power last night to save people. What you did in Godric's Hollow was something that I don't think anyone has ever seen in history. I have been going over it in my head over and over again as well, and I honestly believe you did everything in your power. There is nothing to be ashamed of."

Harry held her gaze for a few more seconds. "I wish I could forget the ones that I wasn't able to save."

"Me too."

He sighed. "That will have to be a problem for later, right now, we need to see Ron."

She nodded and waited for him to put on a shirt and make himself presentable. Harry had a second of hesitation before proceeding to change his clothes. Hermione had no intention of leaving the room right now. if she was going to face the others, then she wanted to do it by Harry's side. His discomfort with changing his clothes around her- well he was just going to have to get over it.

He didn't take long, and a few hygiene charms later he was back to looking like his old self. They nodded to one another and Harry reached for the door handle. Before she knew it, they were in the hall and slowly walking towards the sounds of distinct voices at the far end of the hallway.

Hermione felt the corners of her eyes tighten and the emotions rise to the back of her throat. In the other room, there was a family that was both grieving and hopeful at the same time. What kind of horrible and wonderful twist of fate made it to whereas one child leaves, another returns? If Hermione was having a tough time sorting her feelings on the situation, she couldn't imagine the trouble that Molly and Arthur were going through.

She took another determined step and forced her shoulders back. Harry was right, Ron deserved strength from them. He was the one who had to grieve the loss of a sister. It was not Ron's responsibility to worry about their feelings at the moment. If he was scared, they had to be brave. If he was weak, they had to be strong. He deserved that from them. They had become a team, and despite everything else that had happened in their friendship together, they were still a team.

Ron might be angry at them. As her foot fell another time in front of her, she contemplated her place in that. There was every chance that Ron was going to need someone to be angry at for a time. The stages of grief were something that was a fair standard to accept and her brain rolled through the different things that Harry and she could help him through. It was likely going to hurt, it was going to sting, and he was likely to say things that he didn't mean. For the first time, Hermione locked away her combative nature. All the times she had bickered with Ron, disagreed with him, yelled at him...she put those away and locked them tightly in her mind. He was her _friend_ , she could be strong for him right now.

The second to last footfall felt like sticking her leg through honey. The grief and pain that hung in the air were almost visceral in their strength. She almost stumbled at her body's unexpected resistance to entering the room at the end of the hall. Ron had stood there, been tortured, and flung through the room on the brink of death. To defend her. She grit her teeth and stood as straight as she could. Hermione watched as Harry's shoulders rolled back as well. The line of his jaw was twitching with the effort of keeping his features calm.

They approached the door that was open just a crack and Harry slowly reached out his hand to softly rap his knuckles on the wooden frame. The soft voices stopped instantly and a second later, a very tired looking Fred opened the door. His eyes were rimmed and sunken into his face. Hermione was struck by the level of sadness in his stare like it was a physical blow. The face that was so usually filled with life and laughter, was sunken and gaunt, dark and deadened, harsh and devoid of spark.

"Harry." It wasn't a question, it was just a statement devoid of enthusiasm. If he felt something about seeing them, he didn't show it.

Fred stepped back and let the door swing open wider to admit them into the quiet room. Hermione crossed the threshold and for a moment taking in the sights around her. Her mother was sitting at the head of the bed and dabbing a moist cloth over the beads of sweat that were popping up on Ron's head. The room was starting to attract beams of sunlight through the window, casting half the room into sharp relief from the receding shadows of night. Ginny's body had been moved into the basement earlier this morning so the shadows were the only reminder of her death.

Harry stood shoulder to shoulder with her as Fred returned to the small chair next to his twin. Silence hung heavy for a moment.

"Molly, Arthur...this is al-"

Molly rose from the chair in a lightning flash and was suddenly wrapping Harry in a hug. "No," a single syllable muttered into his chest.

Harry seemed to quake for a moment his entire vibrating with an unseen force. "I'm so sorry..." Harry sobbed as he fell forward into her embrace.

"Me too honey, me too," Molly said as she held Harry close and they both cried. For a moment Hermione was shocked at the change in Harry's demeanor but quickly understood. Harry legitimately did not expect forgiveness from Molly or Arthur. He had put on a brave face so he could face the wrath, but it hadn't come. It had shaken Harry to his core so much that his facade broke.

After a moment they pulled apart and Molly rushed over to wrap Hermione in a close embrace as well. "I'm so glad you are safe Hermione dear." Hermione fell into the embrace and realized how passionately she had yearned to hear that same forgiveness extended to her.

Hermione felt the tears well up in her eyes too. She had been so afraid to face this moment. And here Molly was comforting her. The sheer strength of the woman in front of her, resonated in Hermione so strongly. She was momentarily in awe of this woman that had lost her entire family to the war years ago, and now had lost a daughter to the same war. She was still standing and she was ready to go back to the fight.

Hermione knew at that moment, she would never see Molly Weasley as a doting housewife, or an overbearing mother. This woman was a warrior through and through. The fear she must experience every day as a parent watching her children fight as soldiers...Hermione couldn't even begin to guess. Despite that fear, despite that loss and that grief encompassing her right now, Molly Weasley was still standing.

Hermione scanned the room again after stepping away from Molly and realized that her perception had shifted. Understanding something new about Molly seemed to transfer to the others in the room.

Arthur didn't look devoid of emotion, he looked calculating and focused.

The twins looked furious but the cogs in their minds turning.

Bill, Percy, and Charlie weren't standing impassively near the door, they were standing guard for anyone that might intrude on this sacred space.

And Molly. She wasn't crushed and crumpled by her pain. She was a ball of righteous fury that only a parent could exude. She was focused, determined, furious, and emblazoned with the passion to end the monster that had taken her daughter. Hermione did not doubt that the next person Molly Weasley turned her wand on in the battle, would be obliterated.

This was a family of warriors. Split throughout two wars. Their house name dragged through the mud because of their morals. Family members had laid down their lives to fight, and now, one had fallen as a victim. The people in this room had fought on nearly every battle of this war. Ron had been by their side since exactly six years ago after that first Halloween feast. Gryffindors to the very end.

A small cough came from the other side of the room and all heads turned to watch the features on Ron's face slowly come to life.


	16. Chapter 16: Anger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I feel like I should start this off with an apology. It has been longer than my promised two weeks by quite a bit. As it turned out I had a lot of unexpected family and work things come up that took priority away from my wife and I. But I'm doing my best to get it back into the swing of my new schedule at home. I won't make any promises about update speeds this time, because honestly life is just too chaotic right now for me to be able to say anything with that kind of clarity.
> 
> To all the people that have stuck with it, I thank you. I hope I can continue to provide something worth waiting for.
> 
> To all my friends. Thank you so very much for your support in this story in every way.
> 
> And of course, my darling Wife, who so dutifully edits for me.

**Chapter 16: Anger**

_ “Make the most of your regrets; never smother your sorrow, but tend and cherish it till it comes to have a separate and integral interest. To regret deeply is to live afresh.” - Henry David Thoreau _

November 1st

Ron slowly opened his eyes and blinked a few times, wincing away from the sunlight. The morning light was blinding to his eyes that had been closed for so long. Hermione flicked her fingers to the side and the blinds narrowed, extending their shadow to cover Ron's face and darkening the room a touch.

"Mum," Ron said in a rasping voice as he turned his head to see them.

Molly leaned down and pressed a kiss to his forehead and closed her eyes. The tenderness in her touch was something only a mother's relief could replicate. "Welcome back sweetheart," Molly whispered softly while stroking the hair off of his forehead.

"How long has it been?" The question croaked from his dry mouth and Hermione could see plainly from across the room that it was a struggle for him to speak.

Hermione's mother reached over and handed a cup of water to Molly who took it wordlessly. Molly brought it gently to his lips and let a small sip flow into his mouth. "It's been a little over a month."

Ron's eyes tightened considerably while he swallowed gingerly. "Hermione. Harry. Alive?" he managed to eek out.

"We're here Ron," Hermione said softly. Ron's blue eyes locked with hers and she could see the relief that was in his stare.

"Hurt?"

"Nothing serious," Harry made to sit down but looked at Molly first, she nodded her consent and Harry gently sat at the foot of the bed.

"How are you feeling mate?" Harry asked quietly. Hermione wasn't sure what social phenomenon was happening in the room, but Ron was clearly seeking out Harry and herself first. They had been the last ones with him, and Hermione imagined that things were coming back to him little by little.

Ron pushed himself up to a sitting position. Molly made a small tutting noise in protest, but he waved his hand and she withdrew without any more of a fuss. Hermione marveled at the changes in Molly. She was so different from the woman that she had known before the war. It was like the smothering mother had been her way of hiding from the war, focusing on raising her children. And now that she had accepted that the war was here and Ron was a part of it, she had transformed from smothering to supportive. Molly Weasley was not the woman that had given the cold shoulder to Hermione over a newspaper article.

Ron cleared his throat a bit and took another sip of water. The room was oddly silent except for these small sounds. Ron's eyes moved from silent person to silent person, finally taking in the scene around him as his eyes further adjusted to the light. From person to person his eyes passed. With every movement, the corners of his eyes seemed to tighten and his skin lost? the small amount of color it had gained.

His eyes slowly closed and he leaned back against the bed frame. "Where's my sister?" Ron's voice was much clearer now and she could already hear the inflection of pain reverberating in his speech.

Hermione felt the lump rise in the back of her throat so strongly that she wasn't sure she could breathe. Ginny had been horrible to her, said terrible things, and hurt her deeply. Despite that, Hermione could see that it was a long series of events that had led to those hurtful moments. Ginny had spent the better part of a year with a horcrux constantly by her side. For an entire school year, the literal soul of Tom Riddle was seeping life from Ginny and inserting himself into her thoughts and mind.

The prolonged exposure was probably something that Dumbledore didn't think about after it had been destroyed. The fact that the diary was physically burned hadn't retroactively healed the scars inside Ginny's mind. Hermione wasn't sure what events in the castle had led to the final parts of her will fading. Was the rape from the older Slytherin students what caused her mental collapse? Or was it the other way around? Hermione knew it was a question that would go unanswered.

It didn't change the fact that likely since the beginning of the year, Ginny had been suffering from sexual abuse and mental torture. Her actions with Lucius and his clear use of the Diary's scars in Ginny's mind proved to Hermione that all the dots were connected. The Diary had finally collapsed Ginny's mental state and had led to her torture and death.

This war was being fought on a level of cruelty that Hermione recoiled from with every fiber of her being. The Death Eaters weren't content with simply seizing power. They were compelled by their master to do so in a way that caused as much pain as possible. Their willingness to become agents of such darkness bothered Hermione on a deep level.

The result was before her. A brother mourning the loss of his only sister.

"She's not with us anymore dear," Molly said softly into the silence.

Ron didn't move or make any outward emotions at first, but tears leaked down the sides of his face all the same. His pain didn't need to be loud. It didn't need to announce itself with wails and screams. Ronald Weasley, known for his passionate temper and thoughtless words, bore his grief with silence. A testament to the level of pain he was in, his silence was profound.

"I'm so sorry Ronald," Hermione offered quietly.

  
  


Hermione stormed out the back door of the house. She wasn't sure if she was upset or if she was angry. Each emotion battled for prominence. Her upset at seeing Ron so utterly crushed by grief had been almost more than she could stand. His pain had been so vivid and clear in every feature of his face. After not hearing his voice for so long, for the first words that he had spoken to be something so desperate...just broke her heart.

Her anger was aimed directly at herself. If she had been faster, if she hadn't been caught off guard, if she had been stronger. If only she had been just a bit more...of everything, then maybe Ginny would still be alive. Molly had made Hermione feel moderately better in holding her blameless. But Hermione not blaming herself? That was going to be a process. A process that would certainly take longer than a few minutes.

Hermione ground her teeth as she stomped away from the house, ignoring the pattering footsteps following her. Harry was trailing her quietly. He didn't seem interested in cooling her mood, which she appreciated. He just seemed curious. She got the impression that he wasn't sure what she would do with anger that wasn't directed at him or even for him. It was a new feeling for Hermione as well. For so many years she had saved her ire for those that had hurt Harry in some way. When vileness had been thrown her way, she had managed not to retaliate most of the time. That of course hadn't held true when Harry had been involved.

This time though, she was just angry at herself. She wasn't feeling depressed about it. She wasn't feeling sorry for herself. Hell, she wasn't even beating herself up. It was just a statement of fact- if she had been more than herself, then Ginny would be alive. If it had been an exam, she had gotten a solid EE. But it should have been an O.

And for all that, Harry didn't seem interested in trying to talk her down from her tower of rage. Hermione felt like his trepidation and curiosity was a physical force pressing on her, but he didn't say a word and neither did she.

She finally found her feet slowing down around the same place that she and Harry had kissed for the first time. The wind whistled around them in small gusts and she felt it pull her hair askew. Hermione found that she didn't even have the ability to care.

She stood there for a moment. Letting the feeling of the sunlight on her skin give her some of the warmth she seemed to be lacking inside.

Harry waved his wand and a chunk of earth ripped itself from the ground and floated in the air. "Break it," he simply said, before flopping himself down on the ground.

"Wha-"

"Just break it, it will feel good."

Hermione ground her teeth at his sudden desire to help her. But the idea of breaking something did appeal to her. Instead of snipping at him, she decided to just go with it. After all, she wasn't angry at Harry.

Hermione flicked her wrist and felt her wand fall into her hand. Without thinking she fired a soundless ripple of magic through the air to smash into the block. It exploded in a violent blast of air and dust.

Harry coughed, but waved his hand and the dirt flew away from him. He cleaned his glasses and placed them back on his nose.

Hermione had to admit, that had felt good.

He flicked his wand again and another block of earth floated in front of her.

This time she didn't hesitate and threw another concussive blast, watching the rock explode into tiny shards. Without waiting this time, Harry created more blocks with another flick and they started to spin in slow circles around her. Like moons circling a planet, the rocks wove patterns around her.

Without a second thought, she threw herself into action. Spinning and firing waves of power at the small blocks and turning them into dust. Harry kept silently adding more, giving her more and more targets until finally she slowed down and stopped. Her chest was heaving with her rapid breaths. Between her anger and the exertion from blasting half the field to dust, Hermione leaned over with her hands on her knees and just breathed.

The rocks fell to the ground as Harry continued to sit in silence.

"I can show you some of the more advanced charms we used to put on training dummies at the Academy," Mad Eye said as he came into view suddenly.

Harry raised an eyebrow. "I was wondering when you were going to come over here," Harry said. His tone implied that he had known that Mad Eye was nearby. Hermione must not have noticed him approach while she had been blasting rocks.

"Aye, I wanted to see what all the racket was about. You had me worried there for a minute lass," he said. His tone lacked its usual barking intimidating crack.

"Sorry," Hermione said, not feeling particularly sorry, but also not in the mood to argue with someone.

"Oh no, don't apologize," Moody said, chuckling. "I have broken my fair share of furniture and walls after a mission gone bad."

Hermione didn't have anything to respond to that. The mission had gone bad. And breaking things did feel good. His words weren't trying to placate her or absolve her, they were just an offer of understanding. He had gone through this before.

"Missions don't always work out Granger. This is partly my fault.” He reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a pipe which he promptly lit. "I have been training you for battle. But it occurred to me recently that I haven't prepared you mentally for war."

"Well unless your mental training can make me faster and stronger, then I don't think it would have helped me save Ginny." Hermione snapped, increasingly frustrated again. Why wouldn't anyone just admit that she had failed? They were so concerned with making her feel better that they weren't even admitting the obvious.

Moody looked at her critically for a moment. His spinning eye focused directly on her in an eerie way. He took a puff from his pipe when his wand appeared in his other hand out of nowhere.

Hermione's eyes snapped to the movement and within a second a ring of fire surrounded her. The wild array of blue and red swirled in a circle around her.

"What the hell Mad-Eye!?" Harry barked, now standing.

"Stand back Potter!" Moody growled.

The flames started to march inward. Without thinking, Hermione snapped her wand to her side and silently fired water out of her wand tip. Instead of aiming it at the rapidly approaching flames, she moved the water through the air to make a sphere around her. Mixing wand movements of the bubble head charm, she positioned the sphere of water to surround her entirely. Just as the flames were about to touch the water, Hermione flicked her wand and froze the water solid.

Instantly the heat from outside caused the walls to start to melt. It was a temporary solution that would only buy her a few more seconds. There was no way to conjure enough water to keep the ice in place before the fire got through. She had no idea why Moody was doing this, but she desperately hoped it was a training exercise.

Not letting herself get distracted by worry, she wracked her brain for an alternative way to put out the fire. The ice started to thin and Hermione could see the flames dance on the other side. Then it hit her.

She flicked her wand back into her holster, knelt down, and pressed her hands directly onto the ice in front of her. She calmed her mind and let herself feel the magic that she had felt Harry touch in Godric’s Hollow. The kind of magic that made her heart sing.

Her hands flashed gold and the ice glowed blindingly bright. Without pausing to think, Hermione thrust her hands out to either side and imagined powerful blasts of air at her command. Snapping in response to her thoughts, the dome shattered apart. The wave of ice and air moved the flames back and she stood in the middle again with her hair now whipping around her face. Water from the melting ice had soaked through her closes now and she felt the beads of water mix with the sweat on her brow and slide down her face.

Hermione had had enough. Whatever was happening right now, was about to end. Reaching forward she imagined the bluebell flames that she had conjured so often in years past. She imagined them under her control. And the same way that she controlled the simple spell, she commanded the fire to stop. Hermione closed her luminescent hand and the flames were snuffed by a blast of wind that scattered dust and debris all over the area. Silence was all that remained.

She whirled on Moody and held her hand to her side in defense. "What the fuck?"

Harry came up behind her and stood just behind her shoulder.

"Still think you are too slow?" Moody said, his eye boring into hers.

"Excuse me?"

"You said you needed to be faster. Did you even think about what you just did?" Moody shook his head when she didn't have a response for him. "You said you needed to be stronger. Lass, you didn't even use your wand to put out Fiendfyre!"

"You cast what at her?" Harry growled. Hermione was also slightly in shock. The level of danger he had just put her in...

“Potter, I have forgotten more about magic than you understand. A proper Wizard can control Fiendfyre just fine. Granger wasn't ever in danger."

Hermione felt like that was a bit of a stretch.

"I have taught you speed and power in spades. And you both have taken to it, unexpectedly quickly," Moody said. "Granger, you don't lack speed or power, you just proved that. What I haven't taught you yet is how to accept a loss so that way you can get back up and keep going. Your command of magic surpasses almost every Auror I have ever trained. Don't insult my training and your own hard work by saying otherwise."

Hermione opened her mouth, but for once didn’t have an argument. She was not used to being backed straight into a verbal corner, so She snapped her mouth closed and glared.

Moody smiled a lopsided grin. "Now clean this yard up. You both made a mess."

He barked a laugh as he stomped his way back down the path he had come.

  
  


A few days had gone by and Dan still didn't feel like he had his feet under him. After the initial flurry of activity and panic in the house had settled down, Dan began to people watch. With the death of a child, there was a level of grief that he was unsure that anyone in the house was prepared for. The weight of it seemed to be hanging in every room and dark corner of the house.

Dan was incredibly concerned.

The past few days had been a flurry of activity for most of the Order. They had varying success returning the children at Grimmauld Place back to their homes. A few of the students' families had lived in remote enough locations in the country that returning them had been simple. In a growing majority of the cases though, the families were just gone. It was as if they had been completely removed from existence. No one remembered them, no one knew their names. They were just gone. The confusion and pain that this was causing the children was almost unbearable to watch.

Dan’s concern came from the fact that everyone was busy. The Weasleys were all focused on Ron waking up and processing their grief. Tonks and Remus were working diligently on getting the children home that they could. Minerva was working with Kingsley and Alastor on a plan to get the Castle back. The adults had so much on their plates, Dan was afraid they were overlooking two important things. Or in this case, people.

Harry and Hermione were...withering. When Ron had woken up, Harry had put on a brave face for a few hours until Ron had fallen back asleep. For a moment Dan had thought that Harry was going to bounce back when they found that Ron's magic wasn't completely gone. Dan had hoped that seeing the small bubble of light at the end of Ron's wand would light some hope back into the young man.

Unfortunately that had not come to pass. Harry's physical injury had healed quickly, surprisingly so, but his mental trauma was proving slower to heal. Yesterday, Harry had done something new and went for a long walk, alone. Hermione had been rather put out that he had asked her to say behind. However, after he had left, Hermione had come to Dan and Jane and let some of her emotions out. As she had when she was a child, she had explained her problems and upset in an incredibly logical way, that of course made no sense. His daughter’s insatiable need to insert logic into emotion had never failed to make him smile.

By the time Hermione had finished getting some of it off her chest, Harry had returned. He had been quiet and contemplative. Granted, he hadn't been the most talkative soul before, but now he was silent unless spoken to. His green eyes seemed to take in everything around him, while seeing nothing. Dan could see that Harry needed help, desperately. He had hoped that Hermione would be able to convince Harry to reach out to Remus. Remus had been there for him, and he of course had been close to the Potters before their passing. He seemed like the logical choice of person to be able to help and understand Harry.

But Harry never reached out. In fact, as time went on, Dan could see the only direction Harry was going was inward. Dan's concern had grown now almost to the point of bursting. The adults all were looking this way and that, but they weren't seeing what Harry was going through. Hermione had come to them, but they had taught her from a young age to share her pain with them so they could get through it together. Harry had learned no such thing. In fact he had been tortured by his relatives if he had even suggested sharing his pain with them. Harry was not going to reach out to someone on his own, and if he wasn't listening to Hermione, then he was adrift and alone.

"Why did you want us to be here tonight?" Jane asked Remus from Dan’s side. The dining room of the Keep wasn't the largest room in the house, but it seated the current occupants just fine. Remus had asked them earlier if they would come to this small meeting of the leading members of the Order. Since Halloween, there had been precious little time for the group to have a meeting with any sort of cohesion until now. Remus, Alastor, Minerva, Kingsley, Tonks, Jane and himself sat around the room in varying states of exhaustion. Arthur was the only one not present. He and Molly were still in the process of grieving their lost daughter and reuniting with the two sons that had returned.

"Because we need your help," Minerva said quietly. "It has become abundantly clear that without access to St. Mungo's, we are woefully unprepared for medical attention. As wonderful as Poppy is, she can only be at one place at a time. We were incredibly lucky that you were here, otherwise Harry would have likely died."

Dan raised his eyebrows in surprise. While this group of witches and wizards had tolerance in abundance, they were still from a different culture that had shunned all non-magical ways of thinking for centuries. He understood that breaking this kind of social and cultural barrier was a radical idea.

Minerva sighed. "If you are willing to, we would like you to not only join the Order, but also be in charge of our medical preparedness."

Jane looked at him and he nodded ever so slightly. "We are willing to do that," Jane replied clearly.

"You realize that it could be dangerous? We very well might need your help in the field," Alastor growled.

"The children are risking their lives and fighting this war in the front lines. If there is a way I can stand with my daughter and help, then we are more than willing to do that," Jane said, a fire dancing in her eyes that Dan recognized well. Molly wasn't the only angry mother in the house.

"Tonks, we are asking you to step up into a leadership role as well. You are already helping the students home. I watched you with them during the months at Hogwarts while you were teaching. The children adore you and they feel comfortable with you, more than almost any other professor. With my attention split to getting the Castle back under our control, I can't give them the attention that they deserve in all this.” Minerva looked saddened by the admission, but resolved as well.

"I would be happy to. I'm pretty attached to them as well," Tonks smiled.

“Excellent. Thank you all. With that settled, I think helping the students home will be good for Harry and Hermione to help with. Get them moving again," Minerva said to the group.

Dan blanched and blinked a few times to make sure that he understood what the Headmistress had just said.

"I don't think that's a good idea," Dan blurted out into the room.

"What do you mean? There's a lot that needs doing right now," Kingsley said in a deep voice.

"Sending Harry into a situation would likely only make his PTSD worse," Dan said, failing to keep the tone of shock out of his voice at having to explain this. "He's clearly suffering enough as it is right now."

The faces around the room looked confused and Dan's worry increased.

"This isn’t the first time this has happened to him, surely you must be familiar with how he grieves. How was he in the past?" Jane asked, referencing the last three school years.

"He seemed fine to me at the start of the school year afterwards," Minerva said.

"I will ask Poppy next time I see her for the records of Harry's grief counseling check ups," Dan said slowly. He knew what he was saying, he knew what he was implying, and he unfortunately knew what their response was going to be.

"Grief counseling?"

"Of course, for the past three school years someone has died while Harry was with them. I can't imagine what his mental state would be if that had gone unchecked for so long," Jane said, her tone turning icy.

Dan saw out of the corner of his eye his wife's profile change shape. Her eyes narrowed and her jaw clenched. Hermione was not the only person in the Granger house that was terrifying when they were angry. It appeared that Jane had also put together the same puzzle that Dan had.

The silence hung for a moment, "You haven't done anything have you?" The accusation was strong, but Dan could tell by the tone in his wife's voice that she was past being tactful.

Minerva looked taken aback for a moment. "Well, he was home with his family every summer, we assumed that they would help him past the issue he was going through."

Dan felt his stomach drop out. Harry was in much more trouble than he thought. He felt his internal temperature rise. Dan's fury was starting to build at the group of adults who had collectively forgotten about the orphan in their midst.

Remus looked shell shocked. "Vernon and Petunia Dursley would never do something like that for Harry. They treat him like an unwanted dog."

Jane looked like she was going to burn the building down with the fire in her eyes now. “Headmistress, is there a way to see the student registry for Harry?" Jane asked.

"That information isn't stored at Hogwarts. It's stored at the ministry with the underage magic department," the Headmistress replied, still confused and off balance from Jane's tone.

"I brought it with me from the Ministry. The addresses would be devastating if Voldemort had gotten his hands on them," Kingsley said. He strode over to the stack of boxes in the corner. "Accio 1991 Hogwarts address list." A roll of parchment squeezed itself out of the box and into Kingsley's hand. He handed it to Jane.

She skimmed the page for a moment before nodding and handing the paper back to McGonagall. "Here, read the listing for H. Potter."

Minerva took the scroll and skimmed down similar to how Jane had. However, when her eyes reached the "H" line she stopped and her face went pale. "This must be wrong,” she whispered.

Harry Potter, the Cupboard Under the Stairs read cleanly across the sheet of parchment.

"It’s not. Until he was twelve years old Harry lived in a small cupboard. As punishments for accidental magic they would lock him in there with no food or water for days. Until he was five he thought his name was "freak". He didn’t know his own birthday until he was nine and someone recognized him from our world when they were at the supermarket and wished him a happy birthday. Almost all the accidental magic Harry exhibited as a child was to heal wounds inflicted by his cousin or Uncle," Jane's tone was dead flat. She listed off each bullet point like a stab with a knife. The informative tone of her voice clearly belied her anger.

Remus was white as a sheet and only took a moment before he put his face in his hands and grew silent. Dan could swear he could see the man’s skin ripple with how fast his hair had stood on end. When Remus raised his head, Dan could swear that his eyes had a golden sheen to them.

"I'll kill them," Remus growled deep in his chest. "I'll make them pay for everything they did to him.” He wavered for a moment with emotions. "Lily and James won't forgive me for what I failed to do...but," he trailed off, looking like he wasn't sure what to do with the sadness and anger that were flooding him all at once. After the flash of anger had faded into sadness, his face assumed one of such emotional pain that he seemed to age before their very eyes.

Minerva’s hands were shaking in earnest now. "I told him they were the worst kind of Muggles, but I didn’t believe that anyone was capable of doing that to their own flesh and blood.” Minerva's face didn't have a single trace of color in it and her eyes were unmoving as the realizations hit her.

"I think I will have a talk with Harry and see if I can help," Dan said. Remus looked up and met his eye. Dan had a feeling that Remus had assumed that the responsibility for Harry's wellbeing was falling to him. "I have some training in it at least. I almost went into that field while I was in school." Dan held Remus's gaze unwaveringly. For a moment it looked like Remus was going to challenge Dan on the subject, but finally he dropped his eyes to the floor.

Dan didn't have any ill will toward the man, but there was a rage deep inside of him that he couldn't ignore. As a father, he knew the level of responsibility it took to raise a child and take care of them through all the different things they faced in their life. He had been unable to do this for Hermione while she had been at Hogwarts. His expectation was that the adults at the school would be looking out for and taking care of the children in more than just their education. Dan had expected Remus and Minerva to have been paying more attention to the needs of the children.

Not only had they failed to take care of Harry, Dan could see that they had also failed to take care of Hermione as well. If this was the level of support that they had offered to students that had been in life and death situations every year, then he shuddered to think of all the other things that had fallen through the cracks within Hogwarts.

"While I think that getting Harry the help he needs should be a priority, wouldn't Remus be the more obvious choice? He was Harry's teacher for an entire year," Kingsley said, looking perturbed.

"No," Jane said forcefully. "Harry doesn't need a teacher. He needs a parent."

  
  


Neville stared at the ceiling. The room he was staying in wasn’t that large and there were currently four beds in it. While he had been used to sleeping in a dorm room while at school, he wasn’t used to being in this close of quarters. The dorm rooms at the school were made to have multiple beds in them and house a number of teenage boys. This bedroom outfitted with double bunkbeds on opposing sides of the room was far from that.

After he had gotten everyone here safely, he had attempted to contact his grandmother. She had taken a while to reply which had worried him but in the end she had sent an owl to say that she was safe and not to worry. She did caution him against coming home at the moment though since she felt that the Order safehouse was safer than their ancestral home. “Looking for a house you don’t know about is much harder than looking for a house that you simply misplaced.” Neville had to admit, she had a point.

The short time they had spent in Hogwarts this year had been different than years past. The change in the atmosphere had come from the shadows. He and Luna had known what they needed to do when they realized that Harry wasn't coming back. Tonks had explained herself to them early in the year and they had been doing their best since then. But the stress had become extreme.

Without Harry or Hermione to lead the group, and Ron injured, even Luna had looked to him a number of times to decide what they should do. Neville’s thoughts drifted back to Luna. There was something about her quiet trust in him that he didn’t understand. Even though they had been close since the battle at the Ministry, they had barely known each other before that. But now, even when it had come time to lead the students out of the castle, she had followed him without question. He had always understood why people flocked to Harry or Hermione for that kind of thing. The confidence that seemed to radiate off of them was palpable. But him? That was a new feeling.

This fed into the suffocating feeling that he wasn’t sure he could take any longer. Neville had always been soft spoken and on the outskirts of the main group of students in Gryffindor house. He had been decent enough friends with Harry through their first few years, but he could tell that something changed for Harry during the battle at the Ministry. It had changed him too. He felt more like he belonged with the others than he had felt he belonged anywhere else in his entire life. The “Ministry Six” as the Prophet had called them a few times was something he was proud to have been part of. No one would ever question again why he had been put in Gryffindor house. No one would ever again wonder why he was in the house of the brave. Even his Grandmother had treated him differently after that.

This year had been the first time he had felt the weight of having peers look to him for answers. It was much more of a responsibility than he had realized it would be. He couldn’t imagine what it felt like to Harry, having all those people looking to him to solve all their problems. Neville had barely been able to handle the stress of just a few handfuls. Harry had an entire population looking to him.

He swung his legs out of the bed and slipped out of the room without much sound. The soft footfalls were muffled by the carpet in the hallway and the cushioning of his socks. He didn’t want to wake the others that he was sharing the room with. They were scared obviously and also having some trouble contacting their families. The last thing he wanted was to disturb their sleep.

A minute later he found himself in the kitchen of Grimmauld place, looking out the window at the garden. The garden had been unkempt when they had first gotten to the house, but a few of the house elves from Hogwarts had volunteered to work for McGonagall at the new house since that was where the students were, and now it was tidy and neat. It was a misconception that the House Elves were bonded to Hogwarts itself. House Elves formed family bonds, not bonds with Castles, and the families of the Hogwarts elves were the students. Coming here and taking care of them had been more of a statement from the House Elves about what they were going to do, than what they were offering to do. Neville smiled at that. He knew that it would make Hermione more than pleased to notice it.

He knew what he needed to do all of a sudden. Without thinking he summoned a bit of parchment and a quill, and wrote a quick note on it and dropped it on the table.

Not letting himself get stalled in the moment, he walked out to the garden and quickly turned on his heel apparrating into the garden of the Keep. Tonks had shared the secret with him not long after they had gotten to Grimmauld. In case there was an emergency, she wanted to make sure that he and Luna could do what needed to be done if they had to get the people out of the house in a hurry.

Snapping into the yard, he didn't waste much time before striding over to the house with intention. He focused his thoughts, squared his shoulders, and thought about the way that Luna had looked at him earlier. The earnest trust and faith in him, even though he didn’t feel like he deserved it. Taking a deep breath to calm his nerves, he knocked on the door before pushing it open.

Walking down the hall, he followed the sounds of muffled voices and light streaming from under the door. The door was only partially closed and a strip of light coming into the hall gave him the confidence to knock lightly and then push the door open.

The man and woman that Neville had been introduced to as Hermione's parents were sitting with the other leaders of the Order. Neville felt his throat start to close with all the annoyed eyes on him all of a sudden.

"Mr. Longbottom, we are having a private conversation. Why have you interrupted us this late?" Neville winced but grit his teeth and pushed his mental strength to its limits.

"Because I can’t sleep not knowing what is going on. I helped a decent number of students get out of the school safely, and yet I had no idea what was going on. I risked my life and haven’t been given a scrap of information to show for it. Without Hogwarts being open anymore," he took a breath to steady himself before he continued, "I want to be in the Order. I think I have earned that.” His chin rose slightly. "My parents were part of the Order. It is what they would have wanted."

The other adults seemed to be frozen for a moment at the clarity and determination that Neville had in his voice. On the other hand, Tonks was smiling broadly at him, her face clearly marked with pride.

Remus was the first to react. He slowly looked up from the table and met Neville's eyes solidly. Then his face twisted into something that was a mix between unbridled rage and terrible pain. Neville had only seen the look on someone's face once before. And that was when he had seen his grandmother after the trial of Bellatrix Lestrange. Her fury and sadness had resonated within him more powerfully than the grief over the realization that his parents weren't coming home.

"Wrong!" Remus barked. "Your parents would NEVER have wanted that for you. The only reason we are fighting this battle is because our generation failed you so miserably that now you are paying for our sins. Frank and Alice were two of the most wonderful and caring people I have ever known. It would break your mother’s heart to know that you have to fight in this war," Remus said his eyes red rimmed and furious.

Neville wanted to take a step back. Instead he met the man’s gaze and held his ground. "You may be right. But I will never know now will I? Because an animal took them away from me! You know what I know about my mother!?" Neville reached into his trousers pocket and pulled out something he always kept with him.

Now it was his turn to slam the table. He left behind a small stack of bubblegum wrappers. "THAT is what I know about my mother! For as long as I can remember I have pretended that these are her way of saying that she loves me and is proud of me. So you might be right on what she would think if she knew what was going on, BUT SHE DOESN’T. And she never will. I deserve the right to pay that back in full to the monster that took her away from me." Neville was shaking with anger now. And some trepidation. He had never stood up to the adults like this before. Especially not two of his teachers.

There was a silence in the room for a moment, no one really sure how to respond to the outburst.

Moody started to laugh which confused Neville greatly. "The boy is more like Frank than he will ever know. Not to mention he is right to boot. He has my support."

"Mr. Longbottom, school or no school, you will always be a member of my house. Home of the brave, I cannot in good faith turn you away from this when you are exemplifying everything Godric stood for. You have my support.” McGonagall looked saddened by what she was saying, but her words filled Neville with pride.

"I can’t do this,” Remus said, standing and leaving without another word.

"Kingsley? It comes down to you," Minerva said softly.

"My vote is that anyone who successfully led the raid on the Ministry should be allowed in. They risked their lives to save one of us who they thought was in danger. That was and is enough for me. You have my support. There is a meeting tomorrow afternoon,"

Neville was out of steam at this point. "Thank you. I’ll be there."

  
  


The afternoon Order meeting didn’t provide a lot of new information. Voldemort had indeed taken control of the Ministry, but he was doing it in a way that didn’t insight panic. As it turned out, a good percentage of the Ministry was already at least sympathetic to the Death Eater causes and ideals. Getting them to agree to work under new leadership hadn’t taken much. The worst part was that the insidious way he had taken control allowed him to trick the magical population as a whole into thinking that nothing had changed.

Voldemort hadn’t named himself king of the world yet, and that made things more difficult for the Order. It was harder to fight an enemy that no one knew was there. If the Order tried to stand up to the Ministry, the public would see them as the dissidents. The character assassination that Harry and Dumbledore had undergone in previous years, thanks to Fudge, had set the stage for people to mistrust anything tied to either of them. Voldemort was successfully in control of the Ministry and the public opinion.

Neville quickly learned that being in the Order meetings wasn’t as exciting as he had hoped it would be. Rather than discussing how they were going to fight Death Eaters, they were too busy discussing how to sway the public opinion and turn the people against the Ministry first. If they could sway that, then when the open fight began, they would have the support of the people. So now it was a race between the political machinations of the Dark Lord and the covert dissemination of information from the Order.

Luna had been accepted into the Order without much fuss. Remus had put forward the same arguments that he had with Neville the night before, but the others out voted him and there didn’t seem to be anyone else with any opposition. Neville and Luna had proven that they were worth paying attention to. Being friends with Harry Potter had a tendency to get you noticed from time to time.

The thing that was getting to Neville was that there wasn’t enough being done about the families of the muggle born students, or rather any of the students. It was one thing to know academically that during war difficult decisions needed to be made, but it was another thing entirely to watch those decisions being made. Neville had spent too much time stepping into Harry’s shoes and taking responsibility for the safety of the other students. It hadn’t taken much time for Neville to feel a kinship with the other students that he hadn’t in years previous. The universal threat of possible death and war permeated the entire student body and had given them something to bond over.

The ones that agreed with the dangerous rhetoric aside, there was for a brief time a universal evil that had bound them all together. Even the teenagers could throw away the bonds of House Rivalry when the need came for it. That being said, the students that were slowly being taken care of were his main concern. He couldn’t stop himself from pressing the issue.

“So, and I’m sorry for interrupting, but are we really not going to do anything to reach out to the families of the students that are at Grimmauld Place?”

"We are doing everything we can, Mr. Longbottom, but our means of communication are limited. Anything going through the Floo Network can be tracked and owls are dangerous to send out right now. The fact that this house and Number 12 are under Fidelus makes matters much more difficult. We can’t run the risk of sending out owls with our location written on them with the hope that nothing will fall into the wrong hands," McGonagal answered straightforwardly.

"Ok, but what about side-along apparition to get people home?" Neville countered. He didn’t like arguing with the Headmistress, but he felt that he had to. With Harry gone, no one was here to buck the rules and speak up for the other members of the DA. Keeping track of the needs of two separate organizations was starting to confuse Neville, but he knew that he had to stick with it. The members of the DA and the other students that he had gotten out of the Castle deserved someone to stand up for them. The DA really was a part of the Order, even if not recognized as such. Decades previous Dumbledore had started the Order of the Phoenix when the need in the world had become clear. When the need had become clear inside the walls of Hogwarts, Hermione had done the same thing.

Dumbledore and Hermione shared more traits than either of them wanted to admit. Hermione had encouraged Harry to start the DA in the first place. They thought that no one had noticed the interchanges between them, but Neville had. Hermione hadn’t always been the most covert person and when she really wanted Harry to do something she usually got her way eventually. Neville was soft spoken by nature, but he also listened more than the average person to make up for it.

When Hermione and Harry combined forces they were a powerful force that rivaled, and likely surpassed, Dumbledore’s skills. Neville wasn’t sure that even Dumbledore would have handled the events of Halloween as well as Hermione and Harry had. They had been stronger than he could have ever imagined that night. Walking into complete danger to save others. That was the mark of a true hero, and the world needed more of those. If Hermione could raise her head and fight in those moments, then so could Neville.

"We just don’t have the time or resources for that. Each of those locations need to be scouted out beforehand and then if they haven’t already been destroyed, then proper wards would need to be put into place before we can in good conscious send anyone back to those homes," Minerva finished clearly.

Luna put a hand on his arm and he turned to meet her blue eyes. She seemed to have an idea. "What if we did that? We don’t have combat experience other than what we learned from Harry, but we know how to apparate and we can certainly check their homes from a distance. I did some research into detection charms and I’m fairly sure with some runic manipulation I could accurately cast them from a decent distance. As long as we have some carving materials I could set up a rune string to make it much faster and safer," Luna said, all her dreaminess drained out of her voice. Neville felt his mouth fall open a little bit as he stared at the blond witch.

Professor Flitwick smiled in the corner of the room, knowing exactly why the girl had been placed in his house. McGonagal blinked a few times, trying to reconcile the words that Luna had just spoken with the aloof girl that had been in her classes for years.

"We have some materials in the library. If you can prove that you can have an accurate reading from a distance, then I don’t see a problem with you and Mr. Longbottom taking the lead on that."

Luna squeezed his forearm and smiled at him. She nodded and then left the room. Some confused looks followed her out the room. Neville got the feeling that everyone usually stayed until the end of the meetings. Luna was a woman on a mission though and he had to respect that. While he had been sitting here asking why they weren’t doing anything about the problem as he saw it, she had sat back and thought about what she could do to fix it. Neville would have to work harder on not shying away from taking action. Harry nor Hermione never had, and it would appear that Luna didn’t have any compunction about it either.

Neville turned back to the meeting with a small smile gracing the corners of his mouth. She really had become his partner in crime while the school months had worn on. All eyes had seemed to turn to them the minute Harry, Hermione, and Ron weren't in the Castle anymore. There simply wasn't a presence that could replace Hermione Granger when it came to Hogwarts castle.

He steeled himself a little bit internally as the conversation in the room wore on. He would get those kids home. He had protected them and guided them through a dangerous school year, and he wasn't going to stop until he could get them home where they belonged.

  
  
  


Luna looked around the library. Hermione’s notes and scribbles were still strewn about the room. Maps with pins in them stuck to a number of the walls and even bookshelves. The books were all organized perfectly of course. The alphabetical stacks of books were organized neatly on the desk in front of her. In a few stacks, however, the books were not as perfectly aligned as the others and she noticed that the break always occurred around the same few letters. Upon closer inspection, Luna decided that Hermione must have taken a selection of books with her when she and Harry had left.

Luna was sure that if Hermione had taken them, then they were imperatively critical to the success of whatever the two of them were doing. The only issue was that if those books were that important, then they would be at a disadvantage by not having them. Luna made a tsk noise in disapproval of taking such nice books on a crazy adventure. After all, spending time on the run was no place to have a nice book that might get damaged on the trip. Hermione didn't have quite the eidetic memory that she did. It was one of the single most useful skills Luna had while she was in Hogwarts. Never really forgetting something she read was a good way to maintain top of her class in Ravenclaw. Hermione was smart, there was no doubt of that, but she had been placed in Gryffindor for a reason. The main reason was because of how she was willing to fly into the face of danger for a good cause, but it was also because, at the end of the day, if she had to choose between gaining knowledge or scouring the earth in a noble quest to find that knowledge, she would choose the latter. Luna, on the other hand, appreciated the more subtle search for information.

As she walked through the library and over to the wall that had the majority of maps on the wall, she let her hand graze over the books on the table as she passed. The light touch of her fingertips sliding across the covers and open pages as if to gain their information just by osmosis. A sound at the door caused her to turn around, her hand still resting on one of the open books at the end of the table.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. I just needed a place to think and I didn't think anyone would be in here." Ron said from the doorway looking uncomfortable.

Ron hadn't moved much out of his room in the last few days. After he had woken up he hadn't wanted to see people. Understandably. Hermione and Harry weren't processing the entire situation particularly well and Ron wanting time to himself wasn't making them feel any better. Luna understood what he was going through more than most. Losing a family member was like having a part of you sliced away suddenly and without warning.

"You didn't interrupt me. I was just looking for a few reference books for the rune schemes that I need to create. I'm rather excited that they are letting Neville and I take the lead on something like this. Even though I'm not of age yet, I'm glad that they aren't holding that against me. Either that, or they forgot that I am younger than the rest of you," Luna shrugged and cut off her stream of words. Sometimes when she sensed that someone else was hurting or uncomfortable, she tended to talk more than needed to to make up for it. "I can't imagine how upset you are, losing something so important to you."

He winced. "Even at her worst, I would give anything to have her back."

Ron had misunderstood her meaning.

"Not that. I mean your magic. You must be terribly upset it is gone," Luna said unapologetically.

"How..." Ron trailed off. His eyes burrowing into hers. "Who told you?"

Luna shook her head. "No one. Your aura is gone." Usually Luna would insert some quip about different animals that her father had taught her about. But she knew that right now it wouldn't be appreciated.

Ron just blinked at her a few times.

"Luna, someday. I want to get to know you better."

She smiled. Maybe Ronald was growing up.

"Well, I did have a seer for a grandmother, but other than that, it is just basic observations." Luna was doing everything she could to keep the conversation “normal.” Sometimes when she talked about the creatures that her father studied, or the things she had learned from helping him with the Quibbler, it made people think she was crazy. She wasn't crazy, she just had a wider view of the world than most, and that sometimes scared people.

"I don't know what to do without it," Ron said. "It's like I can't feel something that I should be able to feel. I don't know how to explain it."

"It will come back." Luna said it with finality.

Ron stared at her woefully. "You don't have to say that Luna."

"It's a statement of fact. Magic isn't something you can lose. It isn't yours to begin with. It is a living force that we can interact with to do incredible things," Luna said smiling. "You can't lose your magic. Your connection to it might be damaged, but that is all."

Ron's mouth opened a few times before he closed it and cocked his head to the side. "Every time I think I have you figured out, you go and do something different."

Luna smiled softly in return. "I like keeping people on their toes. It also has the added effect of keeping the nargles away."

Ron laughed softly, "See that is more like the Luna that I know from school." She resisted the urge to wink at him.

"How do you think I can get it back then?"

"The magic isn't gone, you are just going to have to decide if you want to reach out to it," Luna replied.

"Well of course I want to!" Ron exclaimed frustratedly.

"If that was true, then you would be able to do magic right now," Luna said simply. She knew that people hated being talked to in this way. However she had always said what she wanted to say. Even when it had given her a reputation of being strange or obtuse.

Luna was anything but obtuse. So she spun on her heel and turned to the map on the wall behind her. Leaving Ronald to think about her words before trying to argue with her.

She nodded her head, letting her earrings wave back and forth before turning back to the wall and looking intently at the map. There wasn't a lot of information on the map, but there was enough for her to get an idea of what Hermione and Harry were looking for. Or at least a pattern of where they were looking.

"You are searching for something that belongs to him aren't you?" she asked, not needing to qualify who “him” was.

"Uhh, how did you...?"

Luna sighed internally. "It's simple really. The places marked on the map are different locations around Europe important to muggle folklore. As a witch, I am familiar with most of the places since many of them actually did have magical histories. They were simply places where the latent magic was too much to really cover up, no matter how hard we tried. Loch Ness, Dracula, Big Foot, things like those are all stories that they have come up with to explain things we know as facts. The places marked on the map here are all places that have darker stories attached to them. The book on the table is open to a page about historical items that have been connected to these locations. That book over there is a cross reference of all the muggle fairy tales that we as a magical society have contributed to." She took a breath. "During our fight in the Ministry, Voldemort showed that he was still seeking tools to win the war. In that case, it was the prophecy that was destroyed during the fighting. That type of behavior has a basic psychological explanation. Voldemort collects things, doesn't he? Things that he thinks will make him more powerful than he already is. He was worried about a prophecy, assuming it either told of his path to victory or his inevitable defeat. He believes in external forces having a great impact on what he is doing. Therefore, I can assume that the three of you are looking for something that he either hid, or something that he is trying to find first. Simple really,” she said, turning around to face Ron.

His mouth was slack open and she had to laugh at his impersonation of a fish out of water.

"You're completely right. How did you do that?" Ron shook his head, almost looking surprised that he had admitted she was right. “Actually, never mind. That was brilliant."

Luna walked over to the other side of the table. "The only question is, what is it you are looking for?" She put her hand on the book. "Dark and Darker Magical Items of Eastern Europe."

That was when the room around her faded to black and she seemed to slip backwards ethereally. Before she was completely given over to the vision, she had a moment to realize what was happening and stop herself from panicking. That didn't seem to apply to Ron though. His face contorted into one of worry and fear as she felt her eyes roll back into her head. She did so hope that he caught her before she hit the floor. He was a wizard after all, wasn't he?

_ Only a few times before in her life did Luna experience a vision. She found herself staring at the inside of an unfamiliar building. The house was clearly magical, but other than that it looked fairly standard. The only hint of where she was lay in the fact that the house was not exactly kept up very nicely. Motes of dust floated in the air all around her. Even in the perpetual gloom and washed out colors of a vision, she could see them floating in the beams of sunlight coming in from the opened windows. The difficulty with visions was that she didn't really have a lot of control over where or what she saw. The vision was going to show her something in particular and then it was going to be up to her to suss out what it meant. _

_ Thoughts from what seemed a lifetime ago floated through her head, but she shoved them aside. She needed to be concentrating on everything around her. Eidetic memory would come in handy this day. The house was musty and unkempt. The wallpaper was peeling in quite a few places and there appeared to be a room off to her side that hadn't been inhabited in a long time. The vision shifted when she noticed this room, as if responding to her focus. _

_ Now with her perspective in the center of this room, Luna looked around. There were scattered notes on the floor. However, attempting to read them turned them fuzzy. Apparently they were not important to the message the vision was attempting to portray. The desk on the side of the room had a few open books, a number of broken quills and some scattered parchment. The parchment appeared to have some sort of list on it with some words clearly marked out. A few of them floated into focus before phasing out again. “Fire," “Shattering," and "Slicing" had all been scratched through. They didn't remain in focus for any longer than it took Luna to read them. _

_ Under the desk there appeared to be a bundle of blankets and shreds of other clothing or fabrics. There appeared to be some odds and ends in the pile. A mug with a crest imprinted on it. A small photograph that appeared to have been ripped in half. A few articles of silverware and a golden locket that was resting off to the side all on its own. The fact that the locket was in crystal clear focus told Luna what she already knew instinctively; whatever this vision was about, the locket was at the center of it. She could see every curve and edge of the metal. She could make out perfectly the serpent that was embossed on the front side, its emerald eyes glittering in the low light. The chain was pooled underneath it like some kind of low, coiled altar. _

_ She was moving backwards out into the main hallway again and she did everything she could to find a defining trait that she could describe later in hopes of finding this mystery house. Explaining it as an unclean house with peeling wallpaper wouldn't be enough. With the colors seeming to drain out of the world around her, she knew she didn't have much time. She turned her head and saw on the wall a line of House Elf heads mounted on their plaques. At the end of the row there was an empty plaque, apparently awaiting a head to match. The last detail she could make out was the word "Kreature" carved into the plaque. _

_ Luna realized with a jolt that she was looking at Grimmauld Place! It looked derelict and decrepit, but it was certainly the same house. She cast her phantom eyes around in search of some other clue, but knowing she was in the Ancient House of the Black Family was as much information as she could gather before the vision started to change and shift around her. _

_ The new image that it showed was clearly the halls of Hogwarts. Having spent a number of years there, she could recognize most of the corridors that the vision was taking her through. Her memory was serving her in spades in this case, the halls familiar and not needing to come into focus for her to know where she was. _

_ Images of the seventh floor corridor flicked through her consciousness. It felt as if she was flying through the halls like the ghosts were so wont to do. The feel of the castle around her seemed to shift and change with a beating rhythm that she could clearly feel. With surprise, Luna realized the castle was alive and thrumming with magic. Not like a sentient being of course, but it was clearly something that was so invested with magic that it had a signature and life all its own. Luna was moved by how much magic she could feel around her, even in the vision. _

_ As she approached the part of the corridor that she knew the Room of Requirement was hidden in, the feeling around her changed. The feeling took on a darker shade, still magical and still thrumming with life, but now tinged with darkness. The Castle's latent magic seemed to be focusing on this area like an infection in the body. Luna could feel the eddies and swirls of the combatting magics. The door flung itself open and it showed a room that Luna had never seen before. Piles and piles of things, mountains of them even. The pathways that cut through the garbage and broken furniture seemed to wind into the expansive room forever. Luna was well aware that the room was capable of making rooms larger than the great hall, and this one appeared to be working under that constraint. _

_ The feel in the room changed and shifted multiple times, the battle between the inherent goodness of the castle's magic and the invasion that it was so clearly trying to keep at bay. Luna pressed on into the room, desperate to find whatever she was meant to find here. Ron had just confirmed that there were things in the world they were trying to find. Her thoughts scrambled chaotically while she tried to work through what that meant in the back of her mind. She managed to keep focus long enough to reach a far corner of the room. She could sense that if she turned the corner, she would be face to face with what she sought. _

_ Luna pressed her astral image further around the last bend but the details around the edges started to fade and Luna knew that her time here was at a close. Whatever the castle was trying to tell her would have to be done in person. The images faded and Luna felt her astral body slip backwards, the pull of reality yanking her back to herself before she could make a note of anything else in the room. _

  
  



End file.
